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Best pleasure you've experienced?

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  • Registered Users Posts: 2,910 ✭✭✭Gwynplaine


    Dropping a load with no bag.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 183 ✭✭Andreas77


    IAMAMORON wrote: »
    We mainly engaged in some heavy dry humping on the first night. I was very conscious of her regal background and did not want to spoil what we had together. I felt if I had been more forceful with our initial encounter, that she may have considered me to be too loose and overly forward.

    She was wearing a loosely fitted burgundy cashmere jumper, with just a lace slip and bra underneath. I did manage to get both my hands on her breasts at one stage and she seem quite titillated by this. When I began mauling them her kissing became quite intense and she began grabbing my back and lightly scratching it. There followed some rather mild petting of both our major erogenous zones, I managed to remove her belt and loosen her jeans so that I could get my hand down there. She reciprocated by pulling my trousers down just below my waste and began stroking me, quite intensely at times.

    Her clothes no doubt were high quality. She was a snooty little minx. You performed cunnilingus?


  • Registered Users Posts: 12,378 ✭✭✭✭Sardonicat


    Andreas77 wrote: »
    Her clothes no doubt were high quality. She was a snooty little minx. You performed cunnilingus?

    I'm more curious to know why she was wearing a slip when she was wearing jeans and not a dress or a skirt.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,078 ✭✭✭IAMAMORON


    Andreas77 wrote: »
    Her clothes no doubt were high quality. She was a snooty little minx. You performed cunnilingus?

    Not on our initial encounter Andreas77. She was far from snooty, I think it is fair to add. She was a very friendly and a lovely young women, she enjoyed my company and was very comfortable to be around. We mainly engaged in heavy petting and fell asleep after she appeared to have some sort of a seizure at one point. I had at that time both my index and middle finger entered in her cervix and she had begun to move around and up and over my fingers quite rapidly. I had placed my thumb on top of her clitoral area and she had begun to grab my back and neck, squeezing me quite tightly. At one point it got quite intense for about a minute or so, she started moaning and whimpering, whilst beginning to knaw away at my lower neck and shoulder area. She suddenly almost froze whilst grabbing my back and she began to exhale as if she had become out of breath. At this point my hand was quite warm and wet and I was afraid she may have been in some sort of pain. This continued for around 10 or 15 seconds until she eventually calmed down and started hugging me intensely and began kissing and nibbling my neck. She relaxed a couple of minutes and then kissed me quite softly ( no tongue ) for what seemed like an hour. I left the sofa to break some wind and I smoked a joint on the veranda whilst looking over the canal, when I returned to the room she was asleep. I got in beside her and we spooned ourselves until the morning.

    The following day we rented a tandem bicycle and cycled over to Christiania to spend the afternoon. We followed the canal on our way over and almost crashed once when she asked me to chase a Squirrel which had been eating tourist food near the trees. We got off the tandem and had a magical embrace, I had begun to become quite hard at this time and had experienced a lot of pre seminal fluid on my underwear.


  • Registered Users Posts: 12,378 ✭✭✭✭Sardonicat


    Very poor effort, IAAM. Maybe read up on female anatomy before your next post.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 16,789 ✭✭✭✭the beer revolu


    Sardonicat wrote: »
    Very poor effort, IAAM. Maybe read up on female anatomy before your next post.

    Maybe he has extremely long fingers?


  • Registered Users Posts: 12,378 ✭✭✭✭Sardonicat


    Maybe he has extremely long fingers?

    Perhaps. Or perhaps he doesn't realise he just told us he had two fingers inside a woman's uterus.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,078 ✭✭✭IAMAMORON


    Sardonicat wrote: »
    Perhaps. Or perhaps he doesn't realise he just told us he had two fingers inside a woman's uterus.

    You must forgive me Sardonicat, it was quite a long time ago.


  • Registered Users Posts: 445 ✭✭canonball5


    IAMAMORON wrote: »
    You must forgive me Sardonicat, it was quite a long time ago.

    One never heard the phrase, 1 in the pink, two in the stink.


  • Registered Users Posts: 12,378 ✭✭✭✭Sardonicat


    IAMAMORON wrote: »
    You must forgive me Sardonicat, it was quite a long time ago.

    Since Junior Cert biology?


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  • Moderators, Regional East Moderators Posts: 21,502 Mod ✭✭✭✭Agent Smith


    I watched Mary Hannifin Lose her seat.... that was pretty intense


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 183 ✭✭Andreas77


    IAMAMORON wrote: »
    Not on our initial encounter Andreas77. She was far from snooty, I think it is fair to add. She was a very friendly and a lovely young women, she enjoyed my company and was very comfortable to be around. We mainly engaged in heavy petting and fell asleep after she appeared to have some sort of a seizure at one point. I had at that time both my index and middle finger entered in her cervix and she had begun to move around and up and over my fingers quite rapidly. I had placed my thumb on top of her clitoral area and she had begun to grab my back and neck, squeezing me quite tightly. At one point it got quite intense for about a minute or so, she started moaning and whimpering, whilst beginning to knaw away at my lower neck and shoulder area. She suddenly almost froze whilst grabbing my back and she began to exhale as if she had become out of breath. At this point my hand was quite warm and wet and I was afraid she may have been in some sort of pain. This continued for around 10 or 15 seconds until she eventually calmed down and started hugging me intensely and began kissing and nibbling my neck. She relaxed a couple of minutes and then kissed me quite softly ( no tongue ) for what seemed like an hour. I left the sofa to break some wind and I smoked a joint on the veranda whilst looking over the canal, when I returned to the room she was asleep. I got in beside her and we spooned ourselves until the morning.

    The following day we rented a tandem bicycle and cycled over to Christiania to spend the afternoon. We followed the canal on our way over and almost crashed once when she asked me to chase a Squirrel which had been eating tourist food near the trees. We got off the tandem and had a magical embrace, I had begun to become quite hard at this time and had experienced a lot of pre seminal fluid on my underwear.

    Very fine, very fine indeed. She reminds me of my ex wife, when we would go together on picnics. I took picnic basket, enamel plates and mugs, one flask of hot chocolate, a bottle of white wine in a cooler bag, sometimes champagne, tuna and apple sandwiches with red onion, cheese (I remember these especially, to this day, when I eat a tuna sandwich it reminds me her cheeky mouth and teeth with my tongue exploring inside , or her mouth stretched open around my swollen penile, slathering it, this beautiful woman, so that always the smell of tuna sandwich brings back these playful memories)sometimes jelly, chocolate, my nikon camera


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,751 ✭✭✭Motivator


    Just today I had to take an unmerciful shįt but my favourite toilet in work wasn’t accessible for most of the morning. I finally headed down around 2.30 and spent a good 20 mins just enjoying myself. Then I finally made peace with the fact that I had to wipe.

    Considering the size of the load and how much lighter I felt after it, I expected it to be a serious clean up job. What I discovered was amazing. It was a 4 wiper.

    4 quick wipes and I was good to go. I genuinely haven’t enjoyed anything as much in ages. If Monday was that good to me, I can’t wait for the rest of the week.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,707 ✭✭✭Bobblehats


    Motivator wrote: »
    If Monday was that good to me, I can’t wait for the rest of the week.

    It’s fleeting though isn’t it?

    Fleeting as it is floating. Unless of course you forgot to flush ;)


  • Registered Users Posts: 10,275 ✭✭✭✭greenspurs


    Did you get itchy aftewards? Remember in the States I took hydrocodone and it was nice for 3 hours then I itched terribly afterwards. Didn't have any antihistamines nearby. Worst feeling EVER.

    You took Hydrocodone in the U.S ??

    You were there from the age 7 - 10 ??

    wow....

    "Bright lights and Thunder .................... "



  • Registered Users Posts: 13,762 ✭✭✭✭dubstarr


    After giving birth in hospital,the cup of tea and pieces of toast where absolute heaven.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,483 ✭✭✭mr_fegelien


    greenspurs wrote: »
    You took Hydrocodone in the U.S ??

    You were there from the age 7 - 10 ??

    wow....

    No, i took the drug when i went to visit cousins in 2017 when i was 19


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 133 ✭✭Urethral Buttercup


    Had an upsetting dream last night. I was watching a boulevard, is that the word, from a public green space, sitting on a park bench actually, and the street was fairly quiet, but I was observing maybe ten or fifteen women from a distance, and God said to me that I could pick one to engage in consensual sex with me (back, front, top, everything in between). So I picked a brunette with a dark ponytail, slim figure, and God lifted her up and brought her floating in the sky towards me, and as she got closer and closer my heart dropped, as I realized it was a young man with a ponytail in a business suit, and I had been mistaken, and still the deed must be done.


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Had an upsetting dream last night. I was watching a boulevard, is that the word, from a public green space, sitting on a park bench actually, and the street was fairly quiet, but I was observing maybe ten or fifteen women from a distance, and God said to me that I could pick one to engage in consensual sex with me (back, front, top, everything in between). So I picked a brunette with a dark ponytail, slim figure, and God lifted her up and brought her floating in the sky towards me, and as she got closer and closer my heart dropped, as I realized it was a young man with a ponytail in a business suit, and I had been mistaken, and still the deed must be done.

    That's pretty gay..


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,600 ✭✭✭BanditLuke


    Peeing in the swimming pool.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 4,695 ✭✭✭ablelocks


    dubstarr wrote: »
    After giving birth in hospital,the cup of tea and pieces of toast where absolute heaven.

    jesus yes, I remember that feeling. especially after the 4th child when i knew that would be the last one.

    My wife enjoyed hers too, I think.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,794 ✭✭✭Aongus Von Bismarck


    A number of years ago I was involved in a rather difficult break up.

    I took some time off work and headed to Canada to build a log cabin as part of a group. It was an initiative launched by the Canadian National Parks service that brought together members of the First Nations with foreign visitors who wanted to learn woodcraft, survival skills, and hunting.

    Camping out under the stars, fishing from the lake, telling stories, becoming one with the axe, mallet, and chisel. Not a chainsaw, German whine, or smartphone bleep to be heard for the entire 3 weeks.

    The pleasure I experienced when that cabin was finally finished was something that will live with me to the day I die. It will be there long after everyone involved with its creation has died. The euphoric pleasure of nature, hard work, and togetherness still makes me emotional when I think about it.


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,189 ✭✭✭Ubbquittious


    A number of years ago I was involved in a rather difficult break up.

    I took some time off work and headed to Canada to build a log cabin as part of a group. It was an initiative launched by the Canadian National Parks service that brought together members of the First Nations with foreign visitors who wanted to learn woodcraft, survival skills, and hunting.

    Camping out under the stars, fishing from the lake, telling stories, becoming one with the axe, mallet, and chisel. Not a chainsaw, German whine, or smartphone bleep to be heard for the entire 3 weeks.

    The pleasure I experienced when that cabin was finally finished was something that will live with me to the day I die. It will be there long after everyone involved with its creation has died. The euphoric pleasure of nature, hard work, and togetherness still makes me emotional when I think about it.




    Aongus, welcome back. Another sublime post, the whole experience sounds delightful except if I were going myself I'd schneak in a chainsaw just so I could indulge in the smell of sawdust and 2-stroke oil. Hope you are doing well in these covid-ridden times


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,438 ✭✭✭Sgt Hartman


    When the Tramadol kicks in after a bad dose of sciatica, it was like heaven!!


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 14 NackJapier


    Yous ain't lived til you've had sex coming down off acid or psilocybin lads


  • Registered Users Posts: 15,176 ✭✭✭✭ILoveYourVibes


    Music. Art Philosophy ..exercise.

    Oh and this.

    :)



  • Registered Users Posts: 5,718 ✭✭✭pappyodaniel


    That time Archie Gemmill scored against Holland in 1978.


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,034 ✭✭✭joeguevara


    That time Archie Gemmill scored against Holland in 1978.

    I hope people get this reference.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,625 ✭✭✭Millionaire only not


    Down in doolin with the wife ,girlfriend at the time having a ride in the car one night .
    In the height of an intense session opened the door pulled her out onto the grass that was as all dew from the fine weather we were having .
    The Dew from the grass with the sweat from our bodies was some feeling . Mixed with fingers tongues stuck in every nook and cranny of one another still sticks out in my mind owe the memories.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 2,149 ✭✭✭kowloonkev


    nothing beats the sense of accomplishment.


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