2020 Bride/Groom

ainy · 16-10-2018 9:54am #1

Hi everyone,
I have seen a few comment in the 2019 thread about getting married in 2020 so thought I would start this thread.

We are getting married in Feb 2020, we have our venue and church booked, photographer, band and my hair and make up booked.

I am leaving dress shopping until early new year, I'm not sure if there is anything more I can do just yet.

hanaimai · 16-10-2018 2:01pm

I'm also Feb 2020. We have the venue, celebrant, photographer, band and ceremony music booked. Hoping to try and get hair, make-up and flowers done before the end of the year.

I'm dreading dress shopping so think I'll be putting it off for as long as possible!

ainy · 16-10-2018 2:27pm

Flowers are one thing I wasn't sure how long beforehand it would be necessary to have them sorted. I feel like I need my dress before i pick what flowers to use.
I have a new baby, 6 months old so putting off dress shopping until January so I can lose a few more pounds before then. Although I see a lot of the bridal shops are having sample sales soon and I do love a bargain!

Scarinae · 17-10-2018 8:04pm

I'm a 2020 bride too! So far we have our date and the reception venue confirmed. We're fairly sure on the photographer we want, and he's recommended a DJ and a videographer that we'e going to check out. We still haven't decided if we're going to have a church ceremony or a secular ceremony, and we'll need to decide that before we sort some of the other things.

We're in a slightly odd position in that we're not 'officially' engaged... We're planning to get married and have started organising everything, but he still wants to actually propose to me. We'll probably have most of the wedding sorted before we tell people we're getting married, which may be a good thing because nobody will be sticking their oar in (for example, on whether to church or not to church!) It just seemed sensible to get a headstart when we've got so much else going on, like moving continent, buying a house, sorting a job etc.

ainy · 18-10-2018 8:32am

I love that you are doing all the planning without anyone knowing, thats a great idea!! You can do everything you want to.
I have had comments from my mum saying oh I wouldn't have that on the menu etc, I have kind of stopped talking about the wedding to people now, I just don't want their input!!

Minnie_mol · 21-10-2018 8:31pm

Hi everyone!
I'm getting married February 2020 too! I have the venue, church, church singer, videographer and accord course booked and hoping to book most other things before Christmas!

The one thing I can't seem to decide on tho is a band!! I can be indecisive at the best of times but I'm another level with this

I've been to see a few at this stage we wanted pink champagne but unfortunately they were booked. Any ideas of who may be similar?

I'm also putting off dress shopping can't face the the thoughts of it yet!!

jellybear · 21-10-2018 11:33pm

ainy wrote: »

Flowers are one thing I wasn't sure how long beforehand it would be necessary to have them sorted. I feel like I need my dress before i pick what flowers to use.

Just a 2017 bride popping in here

In relation to flowers, you don't need to know exactly what you want this far in advance. My florist only booked 2 weddings per day so they can book up fast. I had a consultation a few months before my wedding day and then a final run through a couple of months before the big day where she made up a mock bouquet for me and I chose my final selection that day.

ainy · 22-10-2018 8:35am

jellybear wrote:

Just a 2017 bride popping in here In relation to flowers, you don't need to know exactly what you want this far in advance. My florist only booked 2 weddings per day so they can book up fast. I had a consultation a few months before my wedding day and then a final run through a couple of months before the big day where she made up a mock bouquet for me and I chose my final selection that day.

Thanks for that jellybear, may contact the florist now so!

ainy · 22-10-2018 8:38am

Minnie_mol wrote:

The one thing I can't seem to decide on tho is a band!! I can be indecisive at the best of times but I'm another level with this I've been to see a few at this stage we wanted pink champagne but unfortunately they were booked. Any ideas of who may be similar?

I don't have suggestions on ones like pink champagne, I picked the first band I went to see, i just loved the lead singer voice, lovely tone to it. They are the soundmen live.

jellybear · 22-10-2018 4:00pm

ainy wrote: »

Thanks for that jellybear, may contact the florist now so!

No problem

Not sure where you're based but I used Sheefin Flowers in Mullingar and I would HIGHLY recommend them

ainy · 22-10-2018 4:55pm

jellybear wrote:

No problem Not sure where you're based but I used Sheefin Flowers in Mullingar and I would HIGHLY recommend them

I'm about half an hour away from mullingar, I had my eye on the local florist so will contact them and see but thanks for the recommendation!

Minnie_mol · 26-10-2018 11:26am

Hi everyone after seeing people mention here booking flowers early I've started to try and look for someone! Does any one have recommendations around the limerick area? I've come across wedding decor businesses as well as wedding florists, I'm not sure which to go for. is there a need for wedding decor in people's opinions? I know most of these decisions are down to taste/ preference but is there an obvious difference between the two? I've seen lovely displays outside churches at friends weddings, are these done by most florists or is this the wedding decor side of things? ... sorry for the longwinded message as you'll tell i have literally no clue about flowers in general anyway so I'm lost when it comes to this

Scarinae · 14-12-2018 7:23pm

So we've put down the deposits for the venue, photographer, videographer and DJ. We've also settled on the church ceremony - it wouldn't have been my personal choice, but it means a lot to my boyfriend so we've agreed to compromise.

I'm not sure if I should tell people how much we've organised when we do get 'officially' engaged, it might seem a bit weird

Faith · 15-12-2018 12:24pm

I mean, you are officially engaged. You just haven’t told people. Engaged means you’ve agreed to get married, you just haven’t had a big proposal. So I’d imagine it would make more sense to announce that you’re getting married (“so happy to announce that John and I are getting married!”), rather than a fake “omg he got down on one knee and asked me to marry him and I was so surprised!” Facebook post or similar. It only sounds weird if you pretend the “proposal” was the first you knew of anything.if anyone asks, be honest - tell them that you got quietly engaged a while ago but didn’t announce it for a while.

Scarinae · 07-01-2019 9:02pm

Oh I know that, that's why I had 'officially' in inverted commas. Anyway we've told everyone now and have started asking people to be bridesmaids/groomsmen etc, which is exciting! We probably won't be doing any more wedding planning for a while though as we've got the move to Canada and all the logistical stuff to sort out first, but we've got the main stuff ticked off at least.

Shelli2 · 13-01-2019 12:54pm

2020 Bride here! Just started looking and narrowed down to 5 venues, 5 wildly different venues. Will be booking viewings this week.

Super excited, but also very overwhelmed.

jesso22 · 16-01-2019 7:01pm

We've just decided to get married! We are in the middle of buying a house, and already have two little boys. Marriage would be the next sensible step, and I like the idea of being a 'wife'. Just the wedding part to get past though aaaaahhhh!
Hate the thoughts of it, so we are going small and local. Besides, we are flat broke. But there's no way our families and friends would let us elope ha!
Going to try for May 2020, when we will be together 10 years. Small private ceremony, then a buffet party for everyone else, something relaxed. Disco for the kids and drinks flowing

Shelli2 · 03-02-2019 10:36pm

Venue, celebrant and ceremony/arrival drinks singer booked.
Enquiries sent to chosen band and wedding car.

Just looking for photographer/ videographer now and once that's booked then I can relax for a few months.

Using an app called Wedding Happy. Finding it great so far for tracking suppliers.

blue note · 11-02-2019 6:19pm

Ah ffs guys, you're making me worried here. We're just engaged a week and were thinking a wedding around February to not stress ourselves too much with trying to do it all in a hurry. And the first two posts are from October and practically have the whole thing organised already!

ainy · 11-02-2019 7:14pm

blue note wrote:

Ah ffs guys, you're making me worried here. We're just engaged a week and were thinking a wedding around February to not stress ourselves too much with trying to do it all in a hurry. And the first two posts are from October and practically have the whole thing organised already!

Ha don't worry!! I was just super organised, I was on maternity leave so wanted to get things sorted before getting back to work.
Plus I wanted to be able to have prices so that I could budget!

It is perfectly doable to organise in a year, you just may not get the exact suppliers you want!

Congratulations on your engagement!

hanaimai · 11-02-2019 8:26pm

blue note wrote: »

Ah ffs guys, you're making me worried here. We're just engaged a week and were thinking a wedding around February to not stress ourselves too much with trying to do it all in a hurry. And the first two posts are from October and practically have the whole thing organised already!

Well we've since cancelled all our plans in that post in favour of a much smaller wedding this October!

mahamageehad · 18-02-2019 12:03pm

Hi!

We're also considering May 2020. Nothing organised - I've started emailing a few folks from humanist Ireland to see availability. I have a *gorgeous* venue in mind that I think should be possible (family connection) but need to settle on a date first and then get a rough idea of numbers.

Similarly to one of the above, we didn't do a big proposal we just decided it was something we wanted to do. We've not told anyone yet and I'm bursting to. Our parents will be over the moon. We'll be together 9 years then. I'm still half afraid he'll change his mind and want to do a big proposal but for me it seems a waste of money to buy a ring when we could save that money and put it towards the party. Not planning to tell anyone til the venue is booked and date is set and basically just send some save the dates. :pac:

baby and crumble · 18-02-2019 12:43pm

blue note wrote: »

Ah ffs guys, you're making me worried here. We're just engaged a week and were thinking a wedding around February to not stress ourselves too much with trying to do it all in a hurry. And the first two posts are from October and practically have the whole thing organised already!

All I will say on that is to try and get the core elements decided on ASAP. Our photographer that we used (I still follow them on Instagram) is now fully booked for 2019 already, with a lot of dates for 2020 gone. We got our date, location, photographer and celebrant nailed down as soon as we could and then took our time with everything else. We got those nailed down almost 2 years in advance which seems excessive but it did mean we had our pick of suppliers. Actually when it came to the celebrant (humanist) the first few we contacted once we had a date were already booked - and that was for a November wedding.

Shelli2 · 18-02-2019 1:35pm

Yep, we've booked 02/05/20, I thought it was so far away but was surprised at the amount of suppliers already booked up!

We got our second choice band.
And while shopping around for photographer and videographer got lots of replies saying they weren't free on our Date!

I've everything booked and deposits paid now. And I've sent my save the date messages.

My bridesmaids are busy planning the hens too.

Just dresses, suits and flowers later in the year.

jellybear · 18-02-2019 1:43pm

Humanists definitely book up very quickly so I would recommend getting that sorted ASAP

Scarinae · 07-03-2019 1:24pm

Fellow podcast listeners - One Fab Day has started a wedding podcast (called The One Fab Day Wedding Podcast, so it's fairly easy to search for) I've listened to a few episodes so far and it seems pretty good! The first episode is about what to do when you're first engaged, and they have another one on dealing with tricky parents - it's probably the most useful for people early in the wedding planning stages but they have some handy tips.

oneright · 22-03-2019 10:11pm

Shelli2 wrote: »

2020 Bride here! Just started looking and narrowed down to 5 venues, 5 wildly different venues. Will be booking viewings this week.

Super excited, but also very overwhelmed.[/QUOTE
Very much where we are at! Picking a month is also hard!

mahamageehad · 24-03-2019 3:35pm

mahamageehad wrote: »

Hi! We're also considering May 2020. Nothing organised - I've started emailing a few folks from humanist Ireland to see availability. I have a *gorgeous* venue in mind that I think should be possible (family connection) but need to settle on a date first and then get a rough idea of numbers.

Similarly to one of the above, we didn't do a big proposal we just decided it was something we wanted to do. We've not told anyone yet and I'm bursting to. Our parents will be over the moon. We'll be together 9 years then. I'm still half afraid he'll change his mind and want to do a big proposal but for me it seems a waste of money to buy a ring when we could save that money and put it towards the party. Not planning to tell anyone til the venue is booked and date is set and basically just send some save the dates. :pac:

Venue booked for April 2020, celebrant booked, ceremony music booked, and in the process of making the save the dates. We're down to two or three bands that we're deciding on. I've also got the postal notification ready to drop in the post tomorrow. Got some quotes for hair/makeup. Next thing is to look at photographers. Wedding insurance isn't possible. Planning has been pretty smooth so far.

Oh, and we finally told people!

He never did change his mind.

oneright · 30-03-2019 7:55pm

Struggling with venues! we have been to see 5, the one we want already has a provisional booking. Theyve no other days available in the month we want to get married. How odd would a Wednesday or Thursday wedding be? Would you feel bad about asking people to take 2 days off work?

Shelli2 · 30-03-2019 8:13pm

We're considering cancelling everything and eloping!
I'm all over the place. I can't make up my mind what to do, but the next installment on the venue is due in 4 weeks so I'll have to decide by then.

hanaimai · 30-03-2019 8:38pm

Shelli2 wrote: »

We're considering cancelling everything and eloping!
I'm all over the place. I can't make up my mind what to do, but the next installment on the venue is due in 4 weeks so I'll have to decide by then.

I know how you feel. We had deposits down and everything booked when we decided to cancel the whole thing in favour of a much smaller scale event. I was so stressed when I started to think about changing the plan and it was awful cancelling everything and wondering if you've made the right choice but now a few months later I feel SO much happier with the new plan than with the original plan. We're getting married earlier now which I'm super excited about. And it was much less stress to get things sorted for the smaller event.

It's a really hard position to be in and at the end of the day only you can know what's best. Do whatever will make you and your fiancé happy. Good luck with the decision!

ainy · 31-03-2019 9:37am

oneright wrote:

Struggling with venues! we have been to see 5, the one we want already has a provisional booking. Theyve no other days available in the month we want to get married. How odd would a Wednesday or Thursday wedding be? Would you feel bad about asking people to take 2 days off work?

We are having ours on a thursday as its the date we wanted, I don't see a problem with it. The people who want to be there will be there, you might need to give a bit more notice so people can plan!

SozBbz · 02-04-2019 11:38am

oneright wrote: »

Struggling with venues! we have been to see 5, the one we want already has a provisional booking. Theyve no other days available in the month we want to get married. How odd would a Wednesday or Thursday wedding be? Would you feel bad about asking people to take 2 days off work?

Humm, not great in my opinion.

I've been to a Wednesday wedding and a Thursday wedding before, both couples got quite a bit of stick (good natured mostly, but I think people wanted to them to know they'd been put out). Your good friends/family will still go, but I think it does get noted.

I think people got over the Thursday one more easily, as by taking the friday you essentially had a nice long weekend and some people made a little weekend away out of it, but the Wednesday one was pretty inconvenient. Its still so early in the week, it just feels disruptive to anyone who works the standard working week.

Also i found in both cases that some people who didnt have much annual leave for whatever reason ended up leaving early so they didnt have to take the next day off.

Could you not look at the following month?

blue note · 02-04-2019 12:22pm

oneright wrote: »

Struggling with venues! we have been to see 5, the one we want already has a provisional booking. Theyve no other days available in the month we want to get married. How odd would a Wednesday or Thursday wedding be? Would you feel bad about asking people to take 2 days off work?

I went to a Wednesday one last year which was not much over an hours drive from Dublin. A huge amount of people (myself included) drove home from it. We left around 1 and hadn't been drinking much because we were working the next day.

We wouldn't choose a midweek wedding for that reason.

Shelli2 · 15-04-2019 7:12pm

I think the wobble has passed and we're going to push ahead with our original wedding plans.
It just seemed so overwhelming there for a little bit, but when we took stock we realised that we had all the big decisions made. And what's left can be trimmed back.
I'm starting to look forward to it again, the sense of dread has left.

PinkLady2016 · 29-04-2019 12:08pm

I'm getting married January 2020 booked photographer, venue, DJ's got dress and suit. Bridesmaid is buying her dress. Cake needs 6 months advance notice. Then ordering rings in October. Anyone here sending out Save the Date invites?

B_ecke_r · 29-04-2019 12:13pm

December 2020 and we have

Venue
Photographer
all the music
Church
Video
FLowers
Make Up

still need to sort cars,

haven't touched suits or dresses yet.

Shelli2 · 29-04-2019 6:58pm

PinkLady2016 wrote: »

I'm getting married January 2020 booked photographer, venue, DJ's got dress and suit. Bridesmaid is buying her dress. Cake needs 6 months advance notice. Then ordering rings in October. Anyone here sending out Save the Date invites?

I did a quick Save the date FB message, just because our wedding is the Saturday of the May BH, so I wanted to give people as much notice as possible to avoid clashing with holiday plans.

zedhead · 17-05-2019 9:39am

Joining in for this thread. Just booked our wedding for May 2020.

Keeping things low key with a registry office ceremony with a small group of family and maybe very close friends, meal after with the same group followed by a reception for the larger group of friends and family that evening.

Now the venues are booked gonna take it handy for a few months before we start thinking of other details, might do a bit of dress shopping - but nearly 100% sure I'l be buying something off the rack so no rush on that!

citygal93 · 21-05-2019 3:24pm

Got engaged in March of this year and we've booked our wedding for August 2020. So far we've got the following booked:

Venue
Humanist Celebrant
Photographer

Since booking the above we've taken a step back to relax and I've felt so much happier! Does anyone else feel at happiest in their engagement when they're NOT planning the wedding? Every time I discuss the wedding with the in-laws I get super stressed because of all the judgement and opinions we've faced so far and so I have enjoyed the past few weeks with no wedding talk.

Scarinae · 22-05-2019 4:36pm

citygal93 wrote: »

Every time I discuss the wedding with the in-laws I get super stressed because of all the judgement and opinions we've faced so far and so I have enjoyed the past few weeks with no wedding talk.

Could you just be vague with people who you know are going to be judgemental? I know it's possibly trickier as it's the in-laws but if they ask you about particular wedding plans could you just say you're considering options and then change the subject?

citygal93 · 23-05-2019 1:48pm

Scarinae wrote: »

Could you just be vague with people who you know are going to be judgemental? I know it's possibly trickier as it's the in-laws but if they ask you about particular wedding plans could you just say you're considering options and then change the subject?

see if I say that I'm considering options then I am bombarded with "you should do this and this and this and I'll link you to them and my second cousin twice removed did the same etc etc". I'm sure they mean well but I really don't think they grasp that this is mine and my partner's day, not anyone else's.

zedhead · 23-05-2019 1:54pm

citygal93 wrote: »

see if I say that I'm considering options then I am bombarded with "you should do this and this and this and I'll link you to them and my second cousin twice removed did the same etc etc". I'm sure they mean well but I really don't think they grasp that this is mine and my partner's day, not anyone else's.

Its really hard. We stopped telling people when we were considering options and waited until it was booked. I still had someone suggest a way that we could do our ceremony so that all our guests could be there after I had afterthing all booked (doing small ceremony with family and big party that night).

I really had to bite my tongue not to be rude and just explained we wanted a small intimate ceremony.

citygal93 · 23-05-2019 2:03pm

zedhead wrote: »

Its really hard. We stopped telling people when we were considering options and waited until it was booked. I still had someone suggest a way that we could do our ceremony so that all our guests could be there after I had afterthing all booked (doing small ceremony with family and big party that night).

I really had to bite my tongue not to be rude and just explained we wanted a small intimate ceremony.

yeah I think a lot of the wedding will be me biting my tongue....never knew so many people had so many opinions about what I do with my life! lol

Neyite · 23-05-2019 2:10pm

Most people are well meaning but often don't realise how pushy they come across as.

I had an earful of literally everyone giving their tuppence worth. I didn't really mind the ones who say, would have liked to incorporate [favourite thing of theirs] into their wedding but for whatever reason didn't or couldn't and suggesting it to you because they think it would be nice but the minute anyone said "oh you have to have /do X" like it was an order got shut down. I pointedly told them that I absolutely didn't have to do any of it bar a celebrant and witnesses and if people kept telling me how to plan my wedding, we would elope.

Faith · 24-05-2019 8:43am

zedhead wrote: »

Its really hard. We stopped telling people when we were considering options and waited until it was booked. I still had someone suggest a way that we could do our ceremony so that all our guests could be there after I had afterthing all booked (doing small ceremony with family and big party that night).

I really had to bite my tongue not to be rude and just explained we wanted a small intimate ceremony.

Stop explaining yourself. I do the same thing, but it just leads to arguments because your explanations will never be accepted. I learned to just say “Thanks, we’ll take it under consideration” and move on. Don’t justify, defend, argue or explain.

Scarinae · 07-06-2019 3:00pm

I've just found out that one of my bridesmaids is pregnant - the baby will be around eight months old by the time the wedding comes around. She's offered to step down as bridesmaid but I don't mind if she's still happy to do it, I'd just like to make things as easy as possible for her.

I don't have children myself so can anyone recommend things I should bear in mind? I guess I'll need to get a dress that is somewhat easy to undo for breastfeeding (she breastfed her first child, who is now two, so I think it's safe to assume she'll want to do the same with this one). Similarly, she'd need to have the baby with her when we're getting our hair and makeup done, and possibly during the ceremony itself? I would be checking for places to change nappies anyway, and that the venue has high chairs for smallies.

Is there anything else I haven't thought of?

Shelli2 · 07-06-2019 9:15pm

Scarinae wrote: »

I've just found out that one of my bridesmaids is pregnant - the baby will be around eight months old by the time the wedding comes around. She's offered to step down as bridesmaid but I don't mind if she's still happy to do it, I'd just like to make things as easy as possible for her.

I don't have children myself so can anyone recommend things I should bear in mind? I guess I'll need to get a dress that is somewhat easy to undo for breastfeeding (she breastfed her first child, who is now two, so I think it's safe to assume she'll want to do the same with this one). Similarly, she'd need to have the baby with her when we're getting our hair and makeup done, and possibly during the ceremony itself? I would be checking for places to change nappies anyway, and that the venue has high chairs for smallies.

Is there anything else I haven't thought of?

I think you've got most everything covered, just be aware that you will likely not be able to depend on her for help in the lead up to or indeed on the day, likewise your other bridesmaids will probably not have much help from her with the hens, she might not even attend.
This is not so important if you have a few other bridesmaids, but if you only have 2 it might have an impact.
8 months is a good age though, it's not a teeny tiny baby, other than feeding breaks childcare is easily obtainable for a baby that age.

cant26 · 09-07-2019 12:08pm

Getting married February 2020. Having a really low key registry office ceremony with just our children, our parents and our two witnesses. We will then go for a lovely lunch. That night we will have a party with all our friends and family to celebrate.
Have the registry office date and time booked and have contacted the venue for the party to see about availability. Hopefully will have that nailed down by the end of the week. It’s a blank canvas venue so decor and catering will be sorted once we get confirmation.
We are engaged since the middle of last year and I have been allergic to the idea of a wedding! Once we decided on this plan(last weekend!) I’ve gotten so excited. Yay!!!

blacklilly · 17-07-2019 1:57pm

May 2020 for us, we got engaged in March of this year

We have the following booked:

Church
Church signer
Reception venue
Hair
Make up
Cake
Photographer
Videographer
Car
Band
DJ
Wedding dress
Wedding shoes
Flowers

We will do e-mail invites with one of the wedding websites.

Just having one bridesmaid and one best man, hoping to decide on bridesmaid dress this weekend. Other than that, we are pretty organised:)

citygal93 · 17-07-2019 2:29pm

blacklilly wrote: »

May 2020 for us, we got engaged in March of this year

We have the following booked:

Church
Church signer
Reception venue
Hair
Make up
Cake
Photographer
Videographer
Car
Band
DJ
Wedding dress
Wedding shoes
Flowers

We will do e-mail invites with one of the wedding websites.

Just having one bridesmaid and one best man, hoping to decide on bridesmaid dress this weekend. Other than that, we are pretty organised:)

Wow you're so organised! Mine is August next year and I've only a quarter of those things done

2020 Bride/Groom

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