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The Online Dating Thread Part II **Mod Warning** Read First Post/or Post 7389

18485878990179

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    sharper wrote: »
    Ha I had a similar experience.

    It's possible she was expecting you to ask her out and she took it as you not being interested.

    The guessing game about what people are silently expecting and reacting to is endlessly frustrating. I find it very difficult to get to the point where I'd feel comfortable meeting someone.

    Its head melting really :(

    "Hey I really hate it when people send me messages and then blank me don't you"

    "Yes I really hate that too"

    *blank*

    aaaaargh :(

    I did then message her saying I would be up for meeting for coffee if she is but I also said in the same message I would understand if she is not comfortable doing so yet and would rather chat more.

    I can't tell if shes pissed I didnt instantly ask her out, or just finds the idea of meeting soon uncomfortable.

    Bah all I can do is try to be nice and honest in my messages but this online stuff really has a way of making you feel like some freak of nature. Women can be so hard to read at the best of times, never mind through Internet messaging :(

    I'd much prefer it if women just bluntly told me why they suddenly didnt wanna talk to me anymore, at least I know and learn.

    Ah well, tis really seeming that just like every other aspect of coupling in Irish society..the introverted male has no hope. I can only imagine the kinda guys messaging these girls that they'd be comparing me too.

    sigh.

    There is a very attractive girl I would consider out of my league messaging me, who only replies every 3-4 days. (i find this odd) Starting to wonder if this is a 'keep my replies in the yellow/green' situation as some poster mentioned earlier. :(


  • Registered Users Posts: 40 Busy Lizzie


    Thanks Discodog, I havent signed up to POF yet, but from reading on here I realise Im going to need ALOT of patience! ;)

    SOconfusing - I wouldn't write someone off because you dont get a message everyday. I was on another dating website a couple of months ago and I never thought it'd be so time consuming. I gave it up cos I didnt have time to be online every night writing messages/searching profiles. Though I have decided to make more of an effort this time. :)

    Also dont dwell on the "out of her league" thing, surely she wouldnt be messaging you if she wasn't interested? But then maybe I'm too sensible to understand games!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,144 ✭✭✭stargazer 68


    Discodog wrote: »

    In other words I was agreeing with you that you can't get a date because people assume that you look too good to be true.

    This dating lark would be so much easier if men & women spoke the same language :D

    And I said I need new pics - I meant uglier ones but I was trying to be modest!! :o


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,390 ✭✭✭The Big Red Button


    hey there you :P

    fonz.jpg

    aaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyy :cool:

    Hiya :o

    Oh I had actually been referring to one of my OTHER dates from last night.

    Well, this is awkward. :/

    :P


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,918 ✭✭✭✭Discodog


    Dovies wrote: »
    And I said I need new pics - I meant uglier ones but I was trying to be modest!! :o

    That's quite a good idea. Test the men out & see if they want you just for your looks :D
    Also dont dwell on the "out of her league" thing, surely she wouldnt be messaging you if she wasn't interested? But then maybe I'm too sensible to understand games!

    There definitely are a lot of games being played but one can never make assumptions. I know a couple that have been together for over 20 years. When they met he was 48 & she was 17 ! She is still blonde & glamorous & he is even fatter & balder :D. And before any one makes the obvious assumption - he wasn't wealthy & still isn't !


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,144 ✭✭✭stargazer 68


    Discodog wrote: »
    That's quite a good idea. Test the men out & see if they want you just for your looks :D

    !

    or dont want me at all! :(
    Why is there no crying smilie :confused:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 51,342 ✭✭✭✭That_Guy


    Got message on POF.

    Went to open it.

    Read message.

    Funny message.

    Message was sent by "Deleted User"

    dsfdsufdsfjsdjfdhfdajfadhfadfsda FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU


  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Regional Abroad Moderators Posts: 6,485 Mod ✭✭✭✭silvervixen84


    I'm getting fed up of copy & paste messages. :mad:


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,247 ✭✭✭Maguined


    I'm getting fed up of copy & paste messages. :mad:





    :pac:


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    I'm getting cut & paste messages. :)


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  • Registered Users Posts: 40 Busy Lizzie


    Haha :)

    I was on another site a while ago, and I had my profile written to try and attract people to contact me. Im about to join POF, but I think I'll copy what Larianne did and hide my profile to try avoid all the messers. This way though I'll be making all of the initial contact. Any hints on what I should include to get a reply?! :) Obv I'll have to include what Im interested in, but I dont want it to look like Im sending out my CV!!

    Even as I write this Im thinking, sure if everyone knew what makes someone reply we'd all be out on dates every night :D....but someone might have some guidelines for me!


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,508 ✭✭✭hollypink


    I got a message saying he "liked the look of me, very intoxicating". I initially read it as "very intoxicated" :P (which wouldn't be like me at all at all :D )

    in keeping with the theme above, I suspect that message too was a copy and paste.


  • Registered Users Posts: 779 ✭✭✭ChannelNo5


    Discodog wrote: »


    In other words I was agreeing with you that you can't get a date because people assume that you look too good to be true.

    This dating lark would be so much easier if men & women spoke the same language :D

    Ah..... Discodog and Dovies sittin in a tree K...I...S...S..I...N...G:D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,399 ✭✭✭KamiKazeKitten


    Jaysus, just got this outta the blue...clumsy complimenting (I think...) FTW!
    thats not on stealing some poor girls facebook pics and putting them up on this site.
    you must be a right dog if you have to do that love out of order.

    *Checks mirror*

    No, my face is still my face... :pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 51,342 ✭✭✭✭That_Guy


    Jaysus, just got this outta the blue...clumsy complimenting (I think...) FTW!



    *Checks mirror*

    No, my face is still my face... :pac:

    He sounds like a catch. You should marry him. :pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,918 ✭✭✭✭Discodog


    ChannelNo5 wrote: »
    Ah..... Discodog and Dovies sittin in a tree K...I...S...S..I...N...G:D

    In a tree :eek: ?


  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,914 Mod ✭✭✭✭Insect Overlord


    The awkward moment when you meet up with someone from POF and you realise there's more of a spark between her friend and yourself. :pac:

    (I think I'm doing it wrong.)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 51,342 ✭✭✭✭That_Guy


    The awkward moment when you meet up with someone from POF and you realise there's more of a spark between her friend and yourself. :pac:

    (I think I'm doing it wrong.)

    Score them both, take pictures. God speed young man.


  • Registered Users Posts: 779 ✭✭✭ChannelNo5


    Discodog wrote: »
    In a tree :eek: ?

    Ah live a little Discodog! There are stranger places to kiss a girl!! :p


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,918 ✭✭✭✭Discodog


    ChannelNo5 wrote: »
    Ah live a little Discodog! There are stranger places to kiss a girl!! :p

    Like in a bush :P. Mind you they say that one in the hand is worth two in the bush :D


  • Registered Users Posts: 779 ✭✭✭ChannelNo5


    Discodog wrote: »
    Like in a bush :P. Mind you they say that one in the hand is worth two in the bush :D


    Ooh Err!! Easy Tiger!! ;)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,918 ✭✭✭✭Discodog


    ChannelNo5 wrote: »
    Ooh Err!! Easy Tiger!! ;)

    Tiger ? I don't roar, I don't scratch & I don't bite ..........but I might nibble :P

    Anyway I thought that a sophisticated rock chick could tame a Tiger or at least take one by the tail :pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    tumblr_lpetyfrebJ1qzfmx7o1_500.jpg


  • Registered Users Posts: 73 ✭✭JimBob777


    Its head melting really :(

    "Hey I really hate it when people send me messages and then blank me don't you"

    "Yes I really hate that too"

    *blank*

    aaaaargh :(

    I did then message her saying I would be up for meeting for coffee if she is but I also said in the same message I would understand if she is not comfortable doing so yet and would rather chat more.

    I can't tell if shes pissed I didnt instantly ask her out, or just finds the idea of meeting soon uncomfortable.

    Bah all I can do is try to be nice and honest in my messages but this online stuff really has a way of making you feel like some freak of nature. Women can be so hard to read at the best of times, never mind through Internet messaging :(

    I'd much prefer it if women just bluntly told me why they suddenly didnt wanna talk to me anymore, at least I know and learn.

    Ah well, tis really seeming that just like every other aspect of coupling in Irish society..the introverted male has no hope. I can only imagine the kinda guys messaging these girls that they'd be comparing me too.

    sigh.

    There is a very attractive girl I would consider out of my league messaging me, who only replies every 3-4 days. (i find this odd) Starting to wonder if this is a 'keep my replies in the yellow/green' situation as some poster mentioned earlier. :(

    ha sounds familar, does the name start with an A?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser



    SOconfusing - I wouldn't write someone off because you dont get a message everyday. I was on another dating website a couple of months ago and I never thought it'd be so time consuming. I gave it up cos I didnt have time to be online every night writing messages/searching profiles. Though I have decided to make more of an effort this time. :)

    Also dont dwell on the "out of her league" thing, surely she wouldnt be messaging you if she wasn't interested? But then maybe I'm too sensible to understand games!

    Well its that she replied everytime bar up until she stated how she hates when people stop replying. Its been a few days at this stage and shes been online and on my profile since...

    I obviously just said something wrong some how :(

    Thanks though :)

    Time consuming? Wow the female and male experience is so different. Very hard time finding someone who wants to even chat. Versus not having the time to reply to all the messages....

    And they say its a mans world :p


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    @ JimBob777

    Well no, the "I hate when people chat then stop replying" girl's name does not begin with A.

    But the out of my league, (I say this mainly cause she's taller than me) replies every 3-4 days girls user name does....

    :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,949 ✭✭✭Samich


    Any dates lined up? :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 73 ✭✭JimBob777


    @ JimBob777

    Well no, the "I hate when people chat then stop replying" girl's name does not begin with A.

    But the out of my league, (I say this mainly cause she's taller than me) replies every 3-4 days girls user name does....

    :)

    i only asked cos i guessed you were on OkCupid and this beautiful girl only replys every 3 days or so to me too ha..taught maybe coincidence :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,814 ✭✭✭Nemanja91


    Signed up to POF for the laugh and sent 1 message, here's hoping.


  • Registered Users Posts: 73 ✭✭JimBob777


    Nemanja91 wrote: »
    Signed up to POF for the laugh and sent 1 message, here's hoping.

    send 10 before hoping hah, best of luck on it though :)


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,199 ✭✭✭G-Money


    JimBob777 wrote: »
    send 10,000,000 before hoping hah, best of luck on it though :)

    Fixed your post there.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 35,954 ✭✭✭✭Larianne


    G-Money wrote: »
    Fixed your post there.

    :D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,925 ✭✭✭Otis Driftwood


    Coffee date tomorrow with a girl Ive been chatting too.I could be hungover.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,814 ✭✭✭Nemanja91


    JimBob777 wrote: »
    send 10 before hoping hah, best of luck on it though :)

    I would send more except it seems to be the only girl I've found that I've a bit of interest in.


  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,914 Mod ✭✭✭✭Insect Overlord


    I keep bottling out of sending messages. Somebody e-slap some sense into me!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,122 ✭✭✭DerekDGoldfish


    Its strange when you seem someone on a site you know from somewhere but cant quite place them, I saw a profile and it took about a week to realise I knew her as my boss's ex.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 35,954 ✭✭✭✭Larianne


    I keep bottling out of sending messages. Somebody e-slap some sense into me!

    What have you got to lose?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,814 ✭✭✭Nemanja91


    I keep bottling out of sending messages. Somebody e-slap some sense into me!

    Just go for it, you'll regret it if you keep putting it off, everyone is on it for the same reason so you've nothing to lose.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,199 ✭✭✭G-Money


    Nemanja91 wrote: »
    I would send more except it seems to be the only girl I've found that I've a bit of interest in.

    That's good but for me the old cynic says "Well what are the odd's that she will reply when so many other won't and even if she does, am I the only guy she's been writing to?"

    By all means keep that option open, but personally I find online dating the best/worst example of putting all your eggs in one basket and it backfiring.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,431 ✭✭✭Sky King


    I keep bottling out of sending messages. Somebody e-slap some sense into me!

    Click here


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  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,914 Mod ✭✭✭✭Insect Overlord


    Sky King wrote: »

    It ain't working for me! "Hotlinking disabled." :(

    I know I've nothing to lose really. Just building up the courage to make first contact is all. :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 35,954 ✭✭✭✭Larianne


    It ain't working for me! "Hotlinking disabled." :(

    I know I've nothing to lose really. Just building up the courage to make first contact is all. :)

    FFS do it already!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :mad:



    :pac:


  • Administrators Posts: 54,091 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭awec


    This post has been deleted.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 35,954 ✭✭✭✭Larianne


    awec wrote: »
    4 messages on pof today.

    All of them were zero effort types. :(

    Well, there was a poster back a few pages who has been getting on with a "hi" message person. You never know!! ;)


  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,914 Mod ✭✭✭✭Insect Overlord


    Larianne wrote: »
    FFS do it already!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :mad:



    :pac:

    Done! :p

    Right, that's that hurdle jumped! Now I can worry about whether people reply or not instead. :pac:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,949 ✭✭✭Samich


    Chatting to a girl for a short while tonight, said I'd send a pic (she didn't ask for one) and said she'd "reciprocate depending on my dazzling good looks ;) " in a jokey way so not bitchy like that sounds :P Please write back! :P


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,949 ✭✭✭Samich


    Samich wrote: »
    Chatting to a girl for a short while tonight, said I'd send a pic (she didn't ask for one) and said she'd "reciprocate depending on my dazzling good looks ;) " in a jokey way so not bitchy like that sounds :P Please write back! :P

    Cool, she complimented me and said she'd sent a pic if my joke was good, as I asked her did she wanna hear a joke. ;)

    :P


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,669 ✭✭✭✭Galwayguy35


    @ JimBob777

    Well no, the "I hate when people chat then stop replying" girl's name does not begin with A.

    But the out of my league, (I say this mainly cause she's taller than me) replies every 3-4 days girls user name does....

    :)

    Why would a woman be out of your league because she is taller than you?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,918 ✭✭✭✭Discodog


    Why would a woman be out of your league because she is taller than you?

    As a bit of a short arse myself most women want tall men or at very least taller than them :(


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 965 ✭✭✭johnr1


    Why would a woman be out of your league because she is taller than you?

    Ok, you didn't ask me, but I'll answer as if I believe you actually don't know.

    If you read any discussion on dating anywhere, or have ever asked any of your female friends or sisters, you'd know that most, -not all, but
    most women prefer to date a guy taller than them or at least the same height.


This discussion has been closed.
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