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Missing man at the Cliffs of Moher.

12467…10

Comments

  • #92
    JustShon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,404 ✭✭✭JustShon


    Just to clarify by the way. I'm not trying to come at this from a "Poor me, the system wouldn't help me" point of view.

    I'm just using myself as a very very first-hand example of how the system handles people with obvious mental health issues.


  • #93
    JustShon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,404 ✭✭✭JustShon


    RoisinD wrote: »
    Whatever about the speculation is to who the person is a very big thank you to the Doolin Coast Guard who have been searching day and night since the person 's car was found at the Cliffs.

    They are all voluntary and do trojan work. They had said that they would keep searching until the body was found. This was the 2nd recovery this week. They are a vital part of the community and very much appreciated.

    My godfather has done work with the coast guard out that way, they're brave and dedicated people. They deserve a lot of respect.


  • #94
    LorMal
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,372 ✭✭✭LorMal


    brooke 2 wrote: »
    That is the age of the person whose name has been mentioned a few times already. The secrecy kind of bugs me, as if Joe/Mary Blogs went missing, it would be all over the media. They would not be according much privacy to those individuals.

    Jesus, how can you even think like that? You think there is some sort of hierarchy of suffering?
    You resent his family being afforded some time to be informed before this goes public?
    'This secrecy kind of bugs me'' - well, get over yourself!!


  • #95
    brooke 2
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,472 ✭✭✭brooke 2


    IvyTheTerrible wrote: »
    I think there is a difference between waiting til a body is identified/family informed and removing stigma from suicide, tbh.

    He has been missing for days. His family will have been through hell. Speaking as someone who has experienced such an ordeal, I believe it will be a relief to his loved ones that his body is found. I have told very few people that a sibling of mine died by suicide many years ago, mainly because there are still people who refer to suicides as 'incidents like this' and say such things as 'they might have been concerned about his reputation'. I am also aware of other fairly high profile people whose families have concealed the fact that suicide was the cause of the death of their loved one. There is a lot of hypocrisy in the media about the subject. They tend to circle the wagons when it is one of their own. Perhaps it was mentioned in the RTE or TV3 news bulletins that this individual was missing at the Cliffs of Mother, but I did not hear it.


  • #96
    LorMal
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,372 ✭✭✭LorMal


    Stephen Hero wrote: »
    I did the Darkness Into Light walk a couple of weeks ago and have also contributed to Pieta House.

    But seeing secrecy like this and deaths being reported inaccurately on an ongoing basis (i.e. suicide not mentioned) are making me regret my generosity.

    Want to cover up suicide? Fine but if you think you're getting funding to "raise awareness" then f**k off.

    That is just bizarre thinking.
    You want Pieta House to 'F**k O**' ?????


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  • #97
    brooke 2
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,472 ✭✭✭brooke 2


    eviltwin wrote: »
    Surely his family know he's missing at this stage. If he's well known it could actually be helpful to release his name to the media. No one knows for certain he's killed himself, it could be a tragic accident or he might have left his car there and went somewhere else, wouldn't be the first time.


    If it was something other than suicide, a car accident perhaps, his name would be out there. No amount of 'Darkness into Light' processions will remove the stigma of suicide, as can be seen from some of these posts.


  • #98
    drunkmonkey
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,022 ✭✭✭✭drunkmonkey


    JustShon wrote: »
    Just to clarify by the way. I'm not trying to come at this from a "Poor me, the system wouldn't help me" point of view.

    I'm just using myself as a very very first-hand example of how the system handles people with obvious mental health issues.

    It's not designed to help you by the sounds of it. A couple of simple changes could help a lot.
    I'm going back to the babies and the amount of check ups for development, house visits by the nurse, check is the food on the right levels in the fridge etc. Was going to post a link to what they do for them but the HSE website is broke right now, then decided i'd look at what it says about suicide prevention on the HSE website, it doesn't work today.
    If anyone is thinking of suicide over the next few days, leave it off until next weekend there maybe some useful information on the HSE website.

    Honestly I think we should sell the HSE to the NHS, they seem to have it a lot more together, at least their website works.


  • #99
    s4uv3
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 952 ✭✭✭s4uv3


    brooke 2 wrote: »
    If it was something other than suicide, a car accident perhaps, his name would be out there. No amount of 'Darkness into Light' processions will remove the stigma of suicide, as can be seen from some of these posts.

    Ehh, the body recovered this am hasn't been identified yet, and likely family and friends haven't been notified. Chill the beans like.


  • #100
    pq0n1ct4ve8zf5
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,070 ✭✭✭✭pq0n1ct4ve8zf5


    If he's a public figure it could be partly a litigation thing too I'd imagine?


  • #101
    Ruad
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16 ✭Ruad


    brooke 2 wrote: »
    He has been missing for days. His family will have been through hell. Speaking as someone who has experienced such an ordeal, I believe it will be a relief to his loved ones that his body is found. I have told very few people that a sibling of mine died by suicide many years ago, mainly because there are still people who refer to suicides as 'incidents like this' and say such things as 'they might have been concerned about his reputation'. I am also aware of other fairly high profile people whose families have concealed the fact that suicide was the cause of the death of their loved one. There is a lot of hypocrisy in the media about the subject. They tend to circle the wagons when it is one of their own. Perhaps it was mentioned in the RTE or TV3 news bulletins that this individual was missing at the Cliffs of Mother, but I did not hear it.

    How do you know the poster you're speaking to hasn't experienced the same thing? The media can't (or shouldn't!) release any names before the body has been identified and family notified, the cause of death doesn't change that.


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  • #102
    seamus
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 68,190 ✭✭✭✭seamus


    Allison Important Raft wrote: »
    If he's a public figure it could be partly a litigation thing too I'd imagine?
    No, not really. Dead people can't sue.


  • #103
    DK man
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 458 ✭✭DK man


    If anyone is reading this and experiencing difficulties please talk to someone.....


  • #104
    brooke 2
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,472 ✭✭✭brooke 2


    IvyTheTerrible wrote: »
    I remember that, it was awful.
    When my brother killed himself, one of the emergency responders who came out to the house texted one of her neighbours, who then proceeded to spread the news around. One of my mum's work colleagues came out to the house to "sympathise" before my parents had even had time to call me or my siblings. Some people seem to think "news" is more important than letting a family come to terms with something.

    I am so sorry to hear that. When my extroverted brother died by suicide, one of the local Gardai said to my mother re my other, introverted, brother 'No one would have been surprised if he had done it'!! :( The local Sergeant was fantastic.


  • #105
    JustShon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,404 ✭✭✭JustShon


    I can, unfortunately, weigh in from personal experience again here. I don't remember specifics because I was quite young when it happened but when my sister killed herself I know the authorities afforded us additional privacy protection beyond what would normally be afforded to the family of a recently deceased person, specifically in relation to what information they'll release to the media. It's treated as a sensitive case in much the same way a murder investigation is handled (indeed both of my parents were briefly investigated for murder, but only as a matter of policy than any real suspicion they'd killed her and dressed it up as a suicide)

    If suicide is even so much as suspected it could be that they are affording the family the same level of privacy protection as we received.


  • #106
    pq0n1ct4ve8zf5
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,070 ✭✭✭✭pq0n1ct4ve8zf5


    seamus wrote: »
    No, not really. Dead people can't sue.

    Yeah but if it's not that public figure who's dead and somewhere reports he is, I'd imagine there's very much a policy of erring towards caution


  • #107
    drunkmonkey
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29,022 ✭✭✭✭drunkmonkey


    Allison Important Raft wrote: »
    Yeah but if it's not that public figure who's dead and somewhere reports he is, I'd imagine there's very much a policy of erring towards caution

    It can't be him as he was on the phone this morning apparently.


  • #108
    brooke 2
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,472 ✭✭✭brooke 2


    Augme wrote: »
    It should be up to the family to decide if the name of a missing family member gets released, not the gossips on the internet.

    I agree it should be up to the family but, my point is, this is not always respected by the media, unless it concerns one of their circle.


  • #109
    clairewithani
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,270 ✭✭✭clairewithani


    LorMal wrote: »
    That is just bizarre thinking.
    You want Pieta House to 'F**k O**' ?????

    He didn't say that in fairness.


  • #110
    JustShon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,404 ✭✭✭JustShon


    brooke 2 wrote: »
    I agree it should be up to the family but, my point is, this is not always respected by the media, unless it concerns one of their circle.

    As I said at the bottom of the last page (where posts never get noticed), the authorities do actually treat the information around suicides as sensitive and will only release as much information to the media as the family is comfortable with. At least that's how it was handled when my sister killed herself. I actually managed to keep that one away from my classmates in school for a good 7 years until some gossip got their hands on it.


  • #111
    timmythesheep
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 163 ✭✭timmythesheep


    If you NEED HELP NOW for yourself or for another person:
    CALL 999: in the event of an emergency;
    A & E: visit your Accident & Emergency Department;
    GP: talk to your GP;CALL A HELPLINE:
    Ring SAMARITANS 24/7 on freephone number 116-123


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  • #112
    UpCork
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 688 ✭✭✭UpCork


    drunkmonkey wrote: »
    It can't be him as he was on the phone this morning apparently.

    It isn't him!!!


  • #113
    Ruad
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16 ✭Ruad


    Funny how he hasn't bothered to update his twitter account to instantly put the rumours to rest. Anyone would think he was Keen for attention...


  • #114
    clairewithani
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,270 ✭✭✭clairewithani


    drunkmonkey wrote: »
    It's not designed to help you by the sounds of it. A couple of simple changes could help a lot.
    I'm going back to the babies and the amount of check ups for development, house visits by the nurse, check is the food on the right levels in the fridge etc. Was going to post a link to what they do for them but the HSE website is broke right now, then decided i'd look at what it says about suicide prevention on the HSE website, it doesn't work today.
    If anyone is thinking of suicide over the next few days, leave it off until next weekend there maybe some useful information on the HSE website.

    Honestly I think we should sell the HSE to the NHS, they seem to have it a lot more together, at least their website works.

    In fairness new mothers can feel very isolated. In this day and age family support systems are not what they were and district nurses can pick up on problems small children have that mothers might not. Why is it suicide v new mothers? Why can both not be given support?


  • #115
    brooke 2
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,472 ✭✭✭brooke 2


    JustShon wrote: »
    Gardai already respect the wishes of the family in regard to name releasing don't they?

    The points being made are about busybodies putting the name out there without the family's consent, not the authorities.

    With respect, the point I am trying to make is about the media choosing which names to publish. They display no reticence, or show little respect, when a Joe/Josephine Soap is involved


  • #116
    Ruad
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16 ✭Ruad


    brooke 2 wrote: »
    With respect, the point I am trying to make is about the media choosing which names to publish. They display no reticence, or show little respect, when a Joe/Josephine Soap is involved

    Are you saying that the media reports identities before bodies are identified? Because it's not true...


  • #117
    clairewithani
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,270 ✭✭✭clairewithani


    DK man wrote: »
    If anyone is reading this and experiencing difficulties please talk to someone.....

    Well said.


  • #118
    JustShon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,404 ✭✭✭JustShon


    clairewithani wrote: »
    In fairness new mothers can feel very isolated. In this day and age family support systems are not what they were and district nurses can pick up on problems small children have that mothers might not. Why is it suicide v new mothers? Why can both not be given support?

    It's not suicide v new mothers, drunkmonkey is just using the follow-up care provided to new mothers as an example of how we should be handling cases like mine, where I was afforded absolutely no follow-up care. I might easily have gone home and finished the job then wound up in a morgue with someone going "Well ****, he was only in for an overdose a couple of days ago, someone should've helped him."

    New mothers should be afforded follow-up care, attempted suicides should be afforded follow-up care. The families of the deceased should be afforded follow-up care.
    brooke 2 wrote: »
    With respect, the point I am trying to make is about the media choosing which names to publish. They display no reticence, or show little respect, when a Joe/Josephine Soap is involved

    Fair enough. Well the media is the media, pack of vultures at the end of the day. But I can say, at least, that authorities won't give the name to the media of Joe / Josephine Soap's family don't want it. The rest is just the media being scumbags as usual.


  • #119
    Stephen Hero
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 33 ✭Stephen Hero


    clairewithani wrote: »
    He didn't say that in fairness.

    Thanks

    My problem is with hypocrisy

    People saying that we have a suicide problem

    while simultaneously supporting euphemistic and sanitised reporting of suicides or cover-ups.


  • #120
    Samaris
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,544 ✭✭✭Samaris


    I am just going to throw in a word saying that it's not -necessarily- suicide either. I figure it's likely for falling off the cliffs, I -assume- there are barriers and the like. But accidents do happen too and it would be also awful for the family to be hearing about X's suicide and be racking their brains for clues that simply weren't there.

    At the moment, we know sod-all. We don't know if this is the fella that was missing, we don't know if the body found was the owner of the car left there. We don't even know if the body found fell from the cliffs, given longshore drift and currents.

    Garbage in, garbage out, without information, speculation is pretty useless.


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  • #121
    brooke 2
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,472 ✭✭✭brooke 2


    JustShon wrote: »
    They gave me sh1te all. I agree, they should've done way more at the time but I was in one of Dublin's many over-worked and understaffed hospitals and I suspect they wanted to get rid of me just as much as I wanted to get out of there so when I said "honest doc I'll never do it again" they were more than happy to say "case closed so" and send me on my way.

    Granted we don't know if this case was a suicide yet but given it's the Cliffs of Moher it seems quite likely. The place is plastered with signs with hotline numbers on them for those who need to seek help.

    I know the area well. If a car is found in the car park in the morning, it is quite likely left by a person who has suicided. The sad fact is that it is a go to place for people who wish to kill themselves. Even the morning, a few years ago, shortly before the Chinese leader visited, another body was found there.


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