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Child Item

Missing man at the Cliffs of Moher.

septictank

I didn't hear about this until this morning, no idea who it is, hopefully will show up ok.

http://www.independent.ie/irish-news/cliff-search-continues-for-highprofile-professional-feared-to-have-fallen-into-sea-34717475.html

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Ruad

brooke 2 wrote: »

With respect, the point I am trying to make is about the media choosing which names to publish. They display no reticence, or show little respect, when a Joe/Josephine Soap is involved

Are you saying that the media reports identities before bodies are identified? Because it's not true...

brooke 2

JustShon wrote: »

Gardai already respect the wishes of the family in regard to name releasing don't they?

The points being made are about busybodies putting the name out there without the family's consent, not the authorities.

With respect, the point I am trying to make is about the media choosing which names to publish. They display no reticence, or show little respect, when a Joe/Josephine Soap is involved

clairewithani

drunkmonkey wrote: »

It's not designed to help you by the sounds of it. A couple of simple changes could help a lot.
I'm going back to the babies and the amount of check ups for development, house visits by the nurse, check is the food on the right levels in the fridge etc. Was going to post a link to what they do for them but the HSE website is broke right now, then decided i'd look at what it says about suicide prevention on the HSE website, it doesn't work today.
If anyone is thinking of suicide over the next few days, leave it off until next weekend there maybe some useful information on the HSE website.

Honestly I think we should sell the HSE to the NHS, they seem to have it a lot more together, at least their website works.

In fairness new mothers can feel very isolated. In this day and age family support systems are not what they were and district nurses can pick up on problems small children have that mothers might not. Why is it suicide v new mothers? Why can both not be given support?

Ruad

Funny how he hasn't bothered to update his twitter account to instantly put the rumours to rest. Anyone would think he was Keen for attention...

UpCork

drunkmonkey wrote: »

It can't be him as he was on the phone this morning apparently.

It isn't him!!!

timmythesheep

If you NEED HELP NOW for yourself or for another person:
CALL 999: in the event of an emergency;
A & E: visit your Accident & Emergency Department;
GP: talk to your GP;CALL A HELPLINE:
Ring SAMARITANS 24/7 on freephone number 116-123

JustShon

brooke 2 wrote: »

I agree it should be up to the family but, my point is, this is not always respected by the media, unless it concerns one of their circle.

As I said at the bottom of the last page (where posts never get noticed), the authorities do actually treat the information around suicides as sensitive and will only release as much information to the media as the family is comfortable with. At least that's how it was handled when my sister killed herself. I actually managed to keep that one away from my classmates in school for a good 7 years until some gossip got their hands on it.

clairewithani

LorMal wrote: »

That is just bizarre thinking.
You want Pieta House to 'F**k O**' ?????

He didn't say that in fairness.

brooke 2

Augme wrote: »

It should be up to the family to decide if the name of a missing family member gets released, not the gossips on the internet.

I agree it should be up to the family but, my point is, this is not always respected by the media, unless it concerns one of their circle.

drunkmonkey

Allison Important Raft wrote: »

Yeah but if it's not that public figure who's dead and somewhere reports he is, I'd imagine there's very much a policy of erring towards caution

It can't be him as he was on the phone this morning apparently.

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

seamus wrote: »

No, not really. Dead people can't sue.

Yeah but if it's not that public figure who's dead and somewhere reports he is, I'd imagine there's very much a policy of erring towards caution

JustShon

I can, unfortunately, weigh in from personal experience again here. I don't remember specifics because I was quite young when it happened but when my sister killed herself I know the authorities afforded us additional privacy protection beyond what would normally be afforded to the family of a recently deceased person, specifically in relation to what information they'll release to the media. It's treated as a sensitive case in much the same way a murder investigation is handled (indeed both of my parents were briefly investigated for murder, but only as a matter of policy than any real suspicion they'd killed her and dressed it up as a suicide)

If suicide is even so much as suspected it could be that they are affording the family the same level of privacy protection as we received.

brooke 2

IvyTheTerrible wrote: »

I remember that, it was awful.
When my brother killed himself, one of the emergency responders who came out to the house texted one of her neighbours, who then proceeded to spread the news around. One of my mum's work colleagues came out to the house to "sympathise" before my parents had even had time to call me or my siblings. Some people seem to think "news" is more important than letting a family come to terms with something.

I am so sorry to hear that. When my extroverted brother died by suicide, one of the local Gardai said to my mother re my other, introverted, brother 'No one would have been surprised if he had done it'!!

The local Sergeant was fantastic.

DK man

If anyone is reading this and experiencing difficulties please talk to someone.....

seamus

Allison Important Raft wrote: »

If he's a public figure it could be partly a litigation thing too I'd imagine?

No, not really. Dead people can't sue.

Ruad

brooke 2 wrote: »

He has been missing for days. His family will have been through hell. Speaking as someone who has experienced such an ordeal, I believe it will be a relief to his loved ones that his body is found. I have told very few people that a sibling of mine died by suicide many years ago, mainly because there are still people who refer to suicides as 'incidents like this' and say such things as 'they might have been concerned about his reputation'. I am also aware of other fairly high profile people whose families have concealed the fact that suicide was the cause of the death of their loved one. There is a lot of hypocrisy in the media about the subject. They tend to circle the wagons when it is one of their own. Perhaps it was mentioned in the RTE or TV3 news bulletins that this individual was missing at the Cliffs of Mother, but I did not hear it.

How do you know the poster you're speaking to hasn't experienced the same thing? The media can't (or shouldn't!) release any names before the body has been identified and family notified, the cause of death doesn't change that.

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

If he's a public figure it could be partly a litigation thing too I'd imagine?

s4uv3

brooke 2 wrote: »

If it was something other than suicide, a car accident perhaps, his name would be out there. No amount of 'Darkness into Light' processions will remove the stigma of suicide, as can be seen from some of these posts.

Ehh, the body recovered this am hasn't been identified yet, and likely family and friends haven't been notified. Chill the beans like.

drunkmonkey

JustShon wrote: »

Just to clarify by the way. I'm not trying to come at this from a "Poor me, the system wouldn't help me" point of view.

I'm just using myself as a very very first-hand example of how the system handles people with obvious mental health issues.

It's not designed to help you by the sounds of it. A couple of simple changes could help a lot.
I'm going back to the babies and the amount of check ups for development, house visits by the nurse, check is the food on the right levels in the fridge etc. Was going to post a link to what they do for them but the HSE website is broke right now, then decided i'd look at what it says about suicide prevention on the HSE website, it doesn't work today.
If anyone is thinking of suicide over the next few days, leave it off until next weekend there maybe some useful information on the HSE website.

Honestly I think we should sell the HSE to the NHS, they seem to have it a lot more together, at least their website works.

brooke 2

eviltwin wrote: »

Surely his family know he's missing at this stage. If he's well known it could actually be helpful to release his name to the media. No one knows for certain he's killed himself, it could be a tragic accident or he might have left his car there and went somewhere else, wouldn't be the first time.

If it was something other than suicide, a car accident perhaps, his name would be out there. No amount of 'Darkness into Light' processions will remove the stigma of suicide, as can be seen from some of these posts.

LorMal

Stephen Hero wrote: »

I did the Darkness Into Light walk a couple of weeks ago and have also contributed to Pieta House.

But seeing secrecy like this and deaths being reported inaccurately on an ongoing basis (i.e. suicide not mentioned) are making me regret my generosity.

Want to cover up suicide? Fine but if you think you're getting funding to "raise awareness" then f**k off.

That is just bizarre thinking.
You want Pieta House to 'F**k O**' ?????

brooke 2

IvyTheTerrible wrote: »

I think there is a difference between waiting til a body is identified/family informed and removing stigma from suicide, tbh.

He has been missing for days. His family will have been through hell. Speaking as someone who has experienced such an ordeal, I believe it will be a relief to his loved ones that his body is found. I have told very few people that a sibling of mine died by suicide many years ago, mainly because there are still people who refer to suicides as 'incidents like this' and say such things as 'they might have been concerned about his reputation'. I am also aware of other fairly high profile people whose families have concealed the fact that suicide was the cause of the death of their loved one. There is a lot of hypocrisy in the media about the subject. They tend to circle the wagons when it is one of their own. Perhaps it was mentioned in the RTE or TV3 news bulletins that this individual was missing at the Cliffs of Mother, but I did not hear it.

LorMal

brooke 2 wrote: »

That is the age of the person whose name has been mentioned a few times already. The secrecy kind of bugs me, as if Joe/Mary Blogs went missing, it would be all over the media. They would not be according much privacy to those individuals.

Jesus, how can you even think like that? You think there is some sort of hierarchy of suffering?
You resent his family being afforded some time to be informed before this goes public?
'This secrecy kind of bugs me'' - well, get over yourself!!

JustShon

RoisinD wrote: »

Whatever about the speculation is to who the person is a very big thank you to the Doolin Coast Guard who have been searching day and night since the person 's car was found at the Cliffs.

They are all voluntary and do trojan work. They had said that they would keep searching until the body was found. This was the 2nd recovery this week. They are a vital part of the community and very much appreciated.

My godfather has done work with the coast guard out that way, they're brave and dedicated people. They deserve a lot of respect.

JustShon

Just to clarify by the way. I'm not trying to come at this from a "Poor me, the system wouldn't help me" point of view.

I'm just using myself as a very very first-hand example of how the system handles people with obvious mental health issues.

RoisinD

Whatever about the speculation is to who the person is a very big thank you to the Doolin Coast Guard who have been searching day and night since the person 's car was found at the Cliffs.

They are all voluntary and do trojan work. They had said that they would keep searching until the body was found. This was the 2nd recovery this week. They are a vital part of the community and very much appreciated.

JustShon

Deleted User wrote: »

Sorry. I'm a hospital pharmacist with an interest in mental health. To be honest, even in the UK where I work, mental health isnt the best treated. Usually, once the overdose is dealt with, the patient is usually discharged, a letter will be sent to gp informing him of the admission, patient will encouraged to seek support (asked if family/friend who could help). Ironically, depression is best treated through cbt/ sleep hygiene rather than medication. The problem is arranging the cbt can take ages.

No need to apologise, I took no offense from anything you said

My point is that although it was a cry for help, no help was provided. If I'd been better prepared I might have had enough pills squirreled away to go home and do it all again. I never heard a thing from the hospital or my GP or anyone bar friends and family afterwards. I know that medication isn't always the best course of action but they did nothing. They weren't even the ones who saved me, that was my friend, they just stuck me on saline and restrained me for a while.

Stephen Hero

I did the Darkness Into Light walk a couple of weeks ago and have also contributed to Pieta House.

But seeing secrecy like this and deaths being reported inaccurately on an ongoing basis (i.e. suicide not mentioned) are making me regret my generosity.

Want to cover up suicide? Fine but if you think you're getting funding to "raise awareness" then f**k off.

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

drunkmonkey wrote: »

An assigned public health nurse could do a lot, they do it for babies why can't they do it for adults at risk once it's flagged.

If you start looking into or ever have the misfortune to become acquainted with the mental health services, you'll be shocked. There are some great people working in them, but at a systemic level it's fcuked. Even if someone is given a phone number to call when they're sent home, I have seen situations where family called that number fifty times and still didn't get help or even a clear answer on where to go for it. I've seen that more than once. Nobody knows where to put teenagers, the notion of them needing help is apparently a new one. Know at least one case where a very sick young man died and explicitly referenced being put in an adult ward as the reason. And if you live outside of a big city, you sure as hell better only get sick during office hours. GPs and A&E staff end up being frontline and they're not equipped, even with the best of intentions.

And that's just acute care, prevention? Bitch please

[Deleted User]

JustShon wrote: »

You're not wrong, for once you have the person here to weigh in speculation over whether or not it was a cry for help

However they didn't exactly hear that cry for help did they? How much louder need I have cried than almost ending my life? Perhaps they might have offered help to my corpse had I not called my friend.

Sorry. I'm a hospital pharmacist with an interest in mental health. To be honest, even in the UK where I work, mental health isnt the best treated. Usually, once the overdose is dealt with, the patient is usually discharged, a letter will be sent to gp informing him of the admission, patient will encouraged to seek support (asked if family/friend who could help). Ironically, depression is best treated through cbt/ sleep hygiene rather than medication. The problem is arranging the cbt can take ages.