Trying to Conceive 2016 onwards Chat Thread

Emmal14 · 06-02-2016 7:21pm

FunkSoulSista wrote: »

Any update Emma?!

Negative digital test :-(! I genuinely don't know whats going on!

FunkSoulSista · 06-02-2016 8:14pm

Sorry to hear, what stage are you at in your cycle? I'm in the fertile period per ovia and hubbie has a bit of a tummy bug,hope he's on the mend soon!

Emmal14 · 06-02-2016 10:05pm

FunkSoulSista wrote: »

Sorry to hear, what stage are you at in your cycle? I'm in the fertile period per ovia and hubbie has a bit of a tummy bug,hope he's on the mend soon!

Day 26 as per ovia!! God only knows when af arrives! Poor hubbie!! I hope he gets better soon!

bee06 · 08-02-2016 11:16am

Currently 7 days past ovulation and the waiting is wreaking my head! Had a bit of spotting on Saturday with what felt like ovulation pain so trying not to get my hopes up that it was implantation related but failing miserably.

FunkSoulSista · 08-02-2016 8:21pm

Hard not to symptom spot!! Hope they're actual symptoms anyway, keep us updated. Hubbie on the mend so got some quality time in ;-)

Nellywelly · 08-02-2016 10:12pm

Hi, can I join?
Will be ttc #3 from March so just getting an understanding of my cycle at the moment. I had a missed m/c @ 12 weeks last Oct & had a D&C so needed a few months to recover physically & emotionally. I also had a missed m/c at 10 weeks on my very first pregnancy.
Really hoping things work out better next time as it's probably our last try. We are lucky though to have 2 great kids but nervous now that I've 2 miscarraiges now too. Fingers crossed!

So at the moment I am eating healthy, working out a bit, taking a pregnacare supplement & tracking my cycles....I'm lucky my cycles are fairly regular each month.

Best of luck to everyone!!

Meubles · 09-02-2016 12:04pm

Finally starting to figure out a pattern for my cycle as ovulation has been jumping from CD17 to CD24 but have realised I always get EWCM 2 days before ovulation. Just got a positive OPK this morning but it's not happening with the OH. He is just so stressed about it, he is fine the rest of the month but baby making days he can't perform. I'm trying to be patient and be positive with him but today I want to scream!

We DTD 2 days ago but I feel we need another shot to be in for a chance this month. I'm not going to try later though it's just too stressful....It's only our 5th month and I feel we've never managed to hit the fertile window to give us a chance it's so frustrating....I'm thinking next month not to even mention when I'm ovulating...

bee06 · 09-02-2016 12:27pm

Same thing happened with my husband. Stop telling him when you're ovulating and just have sex regularly. You can step up the frequency when you know you're ovulating but you don't need to tell him.

Neyite · 09-02-2016 12:35pm

I agree. You need to not tell him when you are ovulating. You can always tell him after the fertile window, chances are he'll have a good guess what you are up to anyway, but I found that discussing the technical aspects in depth could quickly turn what should be enjoyable into a chore for both of you.

If you feel you need to do it today, then maybe dress up and surprise him this evening? Bit of a distraction and puts the fun back into it for you and him.

Toots · 09-02-2016 12:37pm

Same thing happened with my husband. I suppose the plus side to having an irregular cycle is he won't be able to work out if you're ovulating (ie he knows you ovulate on the 5th of the month) so just say nothing and start having sex a bit more regularly.

the_sonandmoon · 09-02-2016 12:37pm

bee06 wrote: »

Same thing happened with my husband. Stop telling him when you're ovulating and just have sex regularly. You can step up the frequency when you know you're ovulating but you don't need to tell him.

Was just about to say the same. I found the exact same issue with my husband. And then he would be annoyed with himself afterwards. It was so frustrating.

I stopped telling him when I was ovulating, and eventually stopped tracking it myself, and just tried to ensure we were having regular sex, particularly in the middle of my cycle. We got into a pattern of having sex way more frequently, which led to both of us initiating it more frequently, which took the pressure off. It all eventually fell into place with that approach, and we are now 18 weeks pregnant.

Meubles · 09-02-2016 1:31pm

Thanks for the advice you guys are right I think I will be keeping it to myself from now on and just have regular sex. We visited friends at the weekend and he said 'Oh they probably think we're going to announce that you are pregnant' and it just set me off crying in what felt like out of nowhere! I am tempted to also not do any OPK testing or temping next month and just forget about it for a cycle and relax.

Neyite · 09-02-2016 2:37pm

Meubles wrote: »

Thanks for the advice you guys are right I think I will be keeping it to myself from now on and just have regular sex. We visited friends at the weekend and he said 'Oh they probably think we're going to announce that you are pregnant' and it just set me off crying in what felt like out of nowhere! I am tempted to also not do any OPK testing or temping next month and just forget about it for a cycle and relax.

I only have the best of intentions when I say that you (and your OH) need to try to take a step back and enjoy the process. As you've both seen, TTC can get very emotional, very technical and consequently very stressful very quickly. This is what those annoying people mean when they tell you you need to relax and you want to hit them.

You are only a few months in. Do take a month or so off. Maybe keep a log of your symptoms but don't keep track?

What I've found helpful is to not focus on thinking about it happening *this month* or date-clocking (where you think that if you get pregnant now you'll have the baby by Christmas /someone's birthday etc.) Instead, focus on an arbitrary point in time to daydream about. So for example, daydream about reading stories to a toddler in the near future, but don't daydream about say Christmas 2016 being baby's first Christmas if you know what I mean? I found that really helped me. You are going to think about life with a baby anyway so you might as well steer the thinking in a way that doesn't set you up for disappointment each month.

With regard to people maybe hinting about an announcement, well, you can have a little fun there.

I used to reply "Oh yes, well actually we DO have an announcement" then pause for a few minutes and then say something mundane like that we changed the colour scheme in the living room or we switched from UPC to Sky.

greenttc · 09-02-2016 3:18pm

That is some good advice Neyite and some good tips too. You do hear people saying "stop trying and it will happen" stop worrying/thinking about it" and "enjoy the process" and I listen and say to myself that it makes sense but the strong desire for a baby just takes over your mind completely that even trying to stop thinking about it makes you think about it. But not setting mental dates and even stopping all the tracking is good advice.

We are lucky with the expectations of "news" I was very sick for a long time so people assume I am still sick in some way and not ready/able for a baby yet so they just dont ask! I imagine that would be very tough to deal with, especially when the majority of people just mean well.

greenttc · 09-02-2016 3:26pm

We got a bit of bad news recently. We have both had lots of tests like the bloods and an ultrasound etc. (we have only been trying for about 6 months but I had a feeling something was wrong so went for tests) I am all good and have regular cycles with temping going as it should.

My husband however did not have such luck with his semen analysis. his motility is excellent, concentration is good count is on the very verge of being abnormal but still okay but his morphology is just 1% so that means that only 1% of his sprem are normal. the cut off point for what is acceptable is 4%. totally devastating news. I know that "you only need one" but has significantly lowered our chances.

we have been told however that you cannot judge by just one test so we will repeat this in two/three months. for now he is off all alcohol, caffeine, jacuzzis and saunas and will maintain a clean diet along with taking supplements. massive fingers crossed that it makes a difference. this is by no means an easy task for him at all and there was some resistance in the beginning but he has come around to the idea of commiting to this now.

Has anyone gone through this or have any extra advice? I almost wish the problem was with me, I feel like I would be more in control of fixing the problem.

Meubles · 09-02-2016 3:50pm

Thanks Neyite, that's great advice, I see what you mean about it getting emotional and stressful
quickly, I know my OH is going to be feeling down tonight so I am going to do something nice for him and suggest we 'relax' a bit with the tracking. We attempted trying to have sex every other day this cycle during the fertile week and although it started out well now on ovulation day he is too stressed so I think next month I am going going to watch out for the CM and aside from that try enjoy it and let it happen more naturally. Just feeling so down today when this should be the exciting day we've waited for all month!

This is our 5th month trying, we're both 31 so naively assumed it would happen right away. I definitely put pressure on myself in terms of time frames, everyone I know seems to have gotten pregnant so fast. So it is a nice idea to think in broader terms of our new life rather than having the baby by a specific date. I just started a relaxation yoga class which is amazing hopefully this will help me!

Neyite · 09-02-2016 3:50pm

greenttc, I think on the older chat thread there was a bit of information on improving swimmers with regard to supplements, lifestyle changes and the like. I can't remember who posted on it, but you might find some information there if you do a search.

Luckily in lots of cases, sperm responds really well to healthier regimes so does not necessarily mean that you are straight to ICSI.

greenttc · 09-02-2016 4:09pm

Neyite wrote: »

greenttc, I think on the older chat thread there was a bit of information on improving swimmers with regard to supplements, lifestyle changes and the like. I can't remember who posted on it, but you might find some information there if you do a search.

Luckily in lots of cases, sperm responds really well to healthier regimes so does not necessarily mean that you are straight to ICSI.

Thanks Neyite, yes I did a bit of searching (a LOT if i was honest) and I did find the person you are talking about, I was as stalkerish on boards as you can be and read everyone of her posts and have found them very reassuring (thank you Lucuma if you ever come across this thread!!!) I was so grateful for the level of detail she had given. It was interesting that her posts were some of the only ones regarding morphology though.

I can only hope that we are as lucky as she was! she has two children through natural conception now! she was also battling with bad results from an AMH test where she had a low egg reserve.

there is hope for us all I suppose! just hard to take the blows when they come though.

Tea drinker · 10-02-2016 9:28pm

greenttc wrote: »

We got a bit of bad news recently. We have both had lots of tests like the bloods and an ultrasound etc. (we have only been trying for about 6 months but I had a feeling something was wrong so went for tests) I am all good and have regular cycles with temping going as it should.

My husband however did not have such luck with his semen analysis. his motility is excellent, concentration is good count is on the very verge of being abnormal but still okay but his morphology is just 1% so that means that only 1% of his sprem are normal. the cut off point for what is acceptable is 4%. totally devastating news. I know that "you only need one" but has significantly lowered our chances.

we have been told however that you cannot judge by just one test so we will repeat this in two/three months. for now he is off all alcohol, caffeine, jacuzzis and saunas and will maintain a clean diet along with taking supplements. massive fingers crossed that it makes a difference. this is by no means an easy task for him at all and there was some resistance in the beginning but he has come around to the idea of commiting to this now.

Has anyone gone through this or have any extra advice? I almost wish the problem was with me, I feel like I would be more in control of fixing the problem.

I had poor morphology, I cleaned up things and have had a few good results since. The supplements are good, Zinc gives quick results though i think there are better (i.e. targetted for prgnancy supplement pills) combo packs available. Is anyone (or everyone?) using the drug refund scheme thing? You pay ~ 140 for all your medicines and can get refund back on the rest.

What is the Drugs Payment Scheme?

Under the Drugs Payment Scheme, an individual or family in Ireland only has to pay €144 each month for approved prescribed drugs, medicines and certain appliances for use by that person or his or her family in that month. The amount is determined from time to time by the Minister for Health and Children. If you have a GP Visit Card or do not have a Medical Card you should apply for a Drugs Payment Scheme Card.

This scheme is aimed at those who don't have a Medical Card and normally have to pay the full cost of their medication. It also applies to those who have a GP Visit Card. Anyone ordinarily resident in Ireland can apply to join the scheme, regardless of family, financial circumstances or nationality. Being ordinarily resident in Ireland means that you have been living here for a minimum of one year or that you intend to live here for a minimum of one year.

The definition of a family for this Scheme, is an adult, their spouse, and any children under 18 years. Dependents over 18 years and under 23 years who are in full time education may also be included. Everyone ordinarily resident in Ireland without a Medical Card should have a Drugs Payment Scheme Card.

How Much do I Pay?

You will not pay more than €144 for all your prescribed approved medication each calendar month. This maximum amount is subject to review by the Government from time to time. You must present your card each time you attend the pharmacy before a prescription can be dispensed. For details of the maximum amount please refer to the Drugs Payment Scheme and Medical Card rates leaflet. There are a number of items that legally do not require a prescription but for inclusion under the scheme they do require a doctor's prescription.

http://www.hse.ie/eng/services/list/1/schemes/drugspaymentscheme/

greenttc · 11-02-2016 8:48am

Tea drinker wrote: »

I had poor morphology, I cleaned up things and have had a few good results since. The supplements are good, Zinc gives quick results though i think there are better (i.e. targetted for prgnancy supplement pills) combo packs available.

do you mind me asking what percent you had in your morphology when it was at its worst? I have read about people with 3% and 2% and they really were able to turn things around (raising up to 4% plus) but it is harder to find examples of significant improvement from 1%.

my husband doesnt smoke or take drugs and is very fit and has a reasonable diet but he binge drinks, we might not drink for weeks but every month or so there is an occasion where we go all out!

I wonder will quitting the drink and supplements be enough. I suppose I am asking did you lead a somewhat unhealthy lifestyle before cleaning it up or were you similar to my husband.

Sorry if I am asking too many questions!!! I am just looking for glimmers of hope from somewhere! thank you so much for sharing!

Neyite · 11-02-2016 12:51pm

I've heard that morphology and quality can plummet if there is other ill health the male is experiencing. Even a good belt of flu can affect swimmers. But the good news is that there is a 3 month production timeframe so if you instigate health changes now, in three months the analysis could be very different.

greenttc · 11-02-2016 1:19pm

Neyite wrote: »

I've heard that morphology and quality can plummet if there is other ill health the male is experiencing. Even a good belt of flu can affect swimmers. But the good news is that there is a 3 month production timeframe so if you instigate health changes now, in three months the analysis could be very different.

I have heard that imrpovements can take 3 months too so we are aiming for a positive healthy retest at the end of April, fingers crossed!

Emmal14 · 12-02-2016 9:21pm

Have a very light brownish bleed tonight after a 31 day cycle. Though my stomach in the last 2 weeks is just so bloated its mad! I feel like i have a bump. i hate my body right now i just don't know whats going on.

mollybird · 14-02-2016 6:59pm

well im out for feb so now on to our 3rd month. the joy's eh!! it's our 3rd month trying hoping to catch the egg. keeping everyting crossed anyhow.

bee06 · 14-02-2016 7:22pm

I think I'm out too. Not due until Tuesday but did a test this morning in the hopes I'd have a nice Valentine's Day surprise for himself which was negative. Also been spotting the last few days. Been feeling randomly sick during the week (including today) so had really got my hopes up.

greenttc · 15-02-2016 8:48am

Did AF come in the end Emma? I feel that sometimes when you know it is coming you just want it arrive and get it done with so that you can start all over again instead of going through the waiting!

Good luck for this month molly and bee!

Emmal14 · 15-02-2016 9:35am

greenttc wrote: »

Did AF come in the end Emma? I feel that sometimes when you know it is coming you just want it arrive and get it done with so that you can start all over again instead of going through the waiting!

Good luck for this month molly and bee!

I think it did! Had a very light very brownish bleed that started mid friday and seems to be stopped this morning! Just want to get in to see the gynae in march so i know whats going on! How are you holding up green?

greenttc · 15-02-2016 10:01am

Emmal14 wrote: »

I think it did! Had a very light very brownish bleed that started mid friday and seems to be stopped this morning! Just want to get in to see the gynae in march so i know whats going on! How are you holding up green?

March must seem like a lifetime away to you, I hope you get sorted whatever it is! have you been temping etc so that you have some idea about a possible cycle pattern? Might even help to have data like that for whoever you get to see.

Oddly enough I am still holding out hope for a BFP, AF is due this Saturday. Ever the optimist! I suppose there is still a chance that it could work even if he has wonky swimmers! 1% of them arent wonky after all! He is hoping too!

On the flip side however I have been doing lots of reading on ICSI etc, that is my realist side coming out. We will wait until April for his semen retest and see then. He is determined to get our positive before his retest though. Not easy!

Emmal14 · 15-02-2016 11:01am

greenttc wrote: »

March must seem like a lifetime away to you, I hope you get sorted whatever it is! have you been temping etc so that you have some idea about a possible cycle pattern? Might even help to have data like that for whoever you get to see.

Oddly enough I am still holding out hope for a BFP, AF is due this Saturday. Ever the optimist! I suppose there is still a chance that it could work even if he has wonky swimmers! 1% of them arent wonky after all! He is hoping too!

On the flip side however I have been doing lots of reading on ICSI etc, that is my realist side coming out. We will wait until April for his semen retest and see then. He is determined to get our positive before his retest though. Not easy!

It seems like a million years away! I have been tracking my cycle on the ovia app since dec! Haven't been temping but recording everything else!

Well at least its a 1% chance not a 0% chance! Fingers and toes crossed for you! At least you have caught it early and are doing everything to improve!

Liam McPoyle · 15-02-2016 2:29pm

Herself is due to ovulate in a couple of days.

We have been living very healthily since Christmas, eating better, exercising more, not drinking at all etc so we shall see.

What would have been her due date is coming up in the not too distant future so she has been thinking that if all had gone normally that she would be finishing up for maternity leave shortly, its doubly hard on her as there are a couple of ladies in her office that are going on ML themselves shortly.

Im being as supportive as I can and trying to keep her calm but its hard, my heart breaks for her as she has been a bit weepy the last few days too.

I honestly don't know how ye do it, ladies.

Trying to Conceive 2016 onwards Chat Thread

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