The Weird, Wacky and Awesome World of the NFL - General Banter thread V2

Realt Dearg Sec · 16-07-2015 10:58PM

As a bears fan I have two words: Devin Hester.

Guffy · 17-07-2015 12:24AM

Realt Dearg Sec wrote: »

As a bears fan I have two words: Devin Hester.

Was going to post the same thing. Word for word

Billy86 · 17-07-2015 12:40AM

Realt Dearg Sec wrote: »

As a bears fan I have two words: Devin Hester.

I think he is fairly safe getting in because TOUCHDOWNS WOOOOOOOOOOO TOUCHDOWNS!!

Now don't get me wrong, he deserves to walk in on a laugher, probably first ballot if I am honest. But I think he should be safe because sadly, the general NFL media make Jamie Red Knapp and Eamon Dunphy look like well schooled imperious historians and tactical/analytical geniuses in their fields.

I will never, ever forget the TNF game early last season where the whole half time analysis was former Ravens player Devin Sanders just screaming "wood, Flacco baby! Woop Flacco!! Yeah, it's the Flack-cooooo!!" while former Steelers coach Bill Cowhers I out was "3 and out baby! Yeah baby three and out! Go Steelers, 3 and out yeah!!!". It was the most spectacularly stupid, unentertaining and simply annoying thing related to any sports, or any analysis (outside of US politics) that I can remember ever seeing - I was just very grateful I wasn't trying o convert a "what's this muck?" type of mate to the sport that night! Even worse, it is clearly scripted imo, not a chance I could see Cowher (a genuine student of the game) having nothing beyond "yeah baby, 3 and out!!"

Still, as for special teams I'm guessing it has something to do with one of America's greatest talents, and more finely tuned skills: discrimination. Because those lads loooove to have someone to 'look down on' even if it is totally unjustified. I'm amazed they celebrated Tim Howard after the World Cup rather than ignoring all his good showings because he conceded at the death vs. Belgium. After all, goalkeepers are the 'special teamers' of sawkerball.

eagle eye · 17-07-2015 01:19AM

Watching the CFL game because I read that Rakeem Cato was playing in it. Hamilton Tiger Cats just had a kickoff return td negated by a penalty and I see Jeff Reinbold going crazy on the sideline. Keep forgetting he coaches there, current ST's coach for Hamilton.

Billy86 · 17-07-2015 01:24AM

As per Ian Rappaport of NFL. come... It's not that Wilson wants to hit free agency, according to a source who has spoken with him. It's that he wants to be paid as if he did. Meanwhile, thoughts of a fully guaranteed contract have not left his mind, especially with an agent who regularly negotiates such deals with baseball players."

Man, that God fella drives a hard f***ing bargain! Either that or he's a 49ers fan who wants to see the Seahawks cap space for the next several year decimated. Must've been some chit-chat to sit in on between Russell "God speaks to me, os my word is the word of God. Swear I'm not being pompously self important here" Wilson and the big fella.

eagle eye · 17-07-2015 02:51AM

Cato looked real good in that game, I'd imagine if he keeps up that level of performance that he might get looked at next season in the NFL. Very composed, good footwork, got rid of the ball when it was required and on one play close to halftime they had an opportunity but a field goal was certain from where they were so you gotta be careful and he threw a touchdown to the sidelines which only his receiver had a chance of getting.

Sidenotes, former Patriots, Bucs and Jags WR Tiquan Underwood is playing for the Tiger Cats and doesn't look that good. Brandon Banks, formerly of the Redskins, is also with them. I remember him as a kick-returner for the Redskins and he was pretty tricky, going by the commentators he seems to have made a big name for himself over the last couple of years in Canada as a kick-returner.

GoldFour4 · 21-07-2015 11:34PM

Titans officially sign Mariota, about time too!

raze_them_all_ · 21-07-2015 11:37PM

I see peterson has restructured his contract, colour me shocked

21-07-2015 11:51PM

malistheman wrote: »

Titans officially sign Mariota, about time too!

who caved on the small print the titans or mariota

helimachoptor · 22-07-2015 07:48AM

Both. Partial offset language so probably 50%

Son Of A Vidic · 22-07-2015 05:45PM

malistheman wrote: »

Titans officially sign Mariota, about time too!

Am I right in thinking he was the last drafted player to sort out the contract?

Beefy78 · 22-07-2015 06:08PM

Corvus Maximus wrote: »

Am I right in thinking he was the last drafted player to sort out the contract?

Yeah that's right. Been that way for a while.

helimachoptor · 22-07-2015 06:16PM

yep, titans are always slow with their picks, i think in the last 5 years at least they are normally last or second last to get their 1st round pick signed

Son Of A Vidic · 22-07-2015 07:12PM

Thanks lads, I had it in my head alright but I wasn't to sure.

nasty_crash · 23-07-2015 11:33AM

aparently mariotas deal was because they wanted to ban him from surfing!!

phatkev · 23-07-2015 11:46AM

I remember reading that alright, I'd imagine you'd have a fairly hard time trying to tell a kid from Hawaii he can't surf

Son Of A Vidic · 23-07-2015 01:45PM

nasty_crash wrote: »

aparently mariotas deal was because they wanted to ban him from surfing!!

Barring an unfortunate encounter with a Great White, that's a bit crazy. Now I could understand them saying stay away from something like Motocross.

Realt Dearg Sec · 23-07-2015 01:49PM

Corvus Maximus wrote: »

Barring an unfortunate encounter with a Great White, that's a bit crazy. Now I could understand them saying stay away from something like Motocross.

Or fireworks...

raze_them_all_ · 23-07-2015 01:51PM

Corvus Maximus wrote: »

Barring an unfortunate encounter with a Great White, that's a bit crazy. Now I could understand them saying stay away from something like Motocross.

I'd imagine they would be worried about sprains, broken fingers and dislocations more than big injuries

Billy86 · 23-07-2015 01:52PM

A competitor got attacked by a shark in a big surfing event only a few days back, and they had to call the whole thing off after they got him to safety. Even though shark attacks surfing are pretty rare (sharks typically don't go that close to shore if I am correct, and unless literally starving they have no interest in people who apparently taste awful to them... they usually confuse the surfboard for the underside of a seal, hence how many people get half their board bitten off along with possibly a limb, but rarely much beyond that), my guess is Mariota did most of the caving on that front.

Son Of A Vidic · 23-07-2015 04:17PM

raze_them_all_ wrote: »

I'd imagine they would be worried about sprains, broken fingers and dislocations more than big injuries

Tbh, I'm no professional but I surfed for a few years and the only thing I ever injured was my pride.:(

Billy86 · 23-07-2015 04:28PM

Corvus Maximus wrote: »

Tbh, I'm no professional but I surfed for a few years and the only thing I ever injured was my pride.:(

"Chill out while going for a surf" - the biggest lie in the history of the world! :eek:

Son Of A Vidic · 23-07-2015 04:30PM

Billy86 wrote: »

A competitor got attacked by a shark in a big surfing event only a few days back, and they had to call the whole thing off after they got him to safety. Even though shark attacks surfing are pretty rare (sharks typically don't go that close to shore if I am correct, and unless literally starving they have no interest in people who apparently taste awful to them... they usually confuse the surfboard for the underside of a seal, hence how many people get half their board bitten off along with possibly a limb, but rarely much beyond that), my guess is Mariota did most of the caving on that front.

Ya that guy was down on South Africa otherwise known as shark central. And you're spot on, sharks do mistake the underside of a wet suit for a seal because they usually attack from below. A lot of attacked surfers statements across the globe, have said a shark often appeared to spit them and then swim away out after the initially bite. They probably expected a juicy seal but instead tasted something gross.

But you know what they say, don't let facts get in the way of a good news story/media hype.

Experts objected to media descriptions of the incident. Andrew Ingram, spokesman for the National Sea Rescue Institute, said: “To call it an attack is inaccurate. I’ve watched the slow motion footage very carefully. I think the shark was coming for a look. It felt it had got caught by the lead and tried to get away. If it wanted to bite, it would have done.

“They are inquisitive and intelligent. It’s a young animal and it’s got spooked. If I’d been in the water, I’d have been scared, but with hindsight I don’t think it wanted to bite. Sharks don’t want to bite humans generally; people kill many more sharks.”

http://www.theinertia.com/surf/mick-fanning-was-not-attacked-by-a-shark/

http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/jul/20/south-african-shark-encounter-town-drones-spotters-jeffreys-bay-surfer-mick-fanning

Son Of A Vidic · 23-07-2015 04:34PM

Billy86 wrote: »

"Chill out while going for a surf" - the biggest lie in the history of the world! :eek:

So true and I meant to say in the earlier post that I used to surf.

helimachoptor · 23-07-2015 05:37PM

apparently hes not even a big surfer..

Son Of A Vidic · 23-07-2015 07:59PM

I've seen some freaky things come into hospitals down the years and most were simple accidents that happened at home. One of the freakiest was a girl who nearly died brushing her teeth. She was rushing around in the morning late for work, rushed into the bathroom to finishing cleaning her teeth, slipped on a floor mat and fell driving the tooth brush up through her hard palate and into her Nasal Septum.

Basically up through the top of her mouth and into the cavity behind her nose. She lost consciousness and would have died only for her brother found her. She came into us with the tooth brush impaled in her. Very freaky and she was very lucky. Long story short, don't walking around while brushing your teeth. When it comes to franchises protecting their high value players, there's only so much wrapping in cotton wool you can do. Keep them away from crazy stuff like bungee jumping, hand gliding ect and just hope for the best that they don't trip while brushing their teeth.

23-07-2015 09:52PM

Corvus Maximus wrote: »

I've seen some freaky things come into hospitals down the years and most were simple accidents that happened at home. One of the freakiest was a girl who nearly died brushing her teeth. She was rushing around in the morning late for work, rushed into the bathroom to finishing cleaning her teeth, slipped on a floor mat and fell driving the tooth brush up through her hard palate and into her Nasal Septum.

Basically up through the top of her mouth and into the cavity behind her nose. She lost consciousness and would have died only for her brother found her. She came into us with the tooth brush impaled in her. Very freaky and she was very lucky. Long story short, don't walking around while brushing your teeth. When it comes to franchises protecting their high value players, there's only so much wrapping in cotton wool you can do. Keep them away from crazy stuff like bungee jumping, hand gliding ect and just hope for the best that they don't trip while brushing their teeth.

Iv always said qbs shouldn't rush

In Exile · 23-07-2015 10:55PM

Corvus Maximus wrote: »

I've seen some freaky things come into hospitals down the years and most were simple accidents that happened at home. One of the freakiest was a girl who nearly died brushing her teeth. She was rushing around in the morning late for work, rushed into the bathroom to finishing cleaning her teeth, slipped on a floor mat and fell driving the tooth brush up through her hard palate and into her Nasal Septum.

Basically up through the top of her mouth and into the cavity behind her nose. She lost consciousness and would have died only for her brother found her. She came into us with the tooth brush impaled in her. Very freaky and she was very lucky. Long story short, don't walking around while brushing your teeth. When it comes to franchises protecting their high value players, there's only so much wrapping in cotton wool you can do. Keep them away from crazy stuff like bungee jumping, hand gliding ect and just hope for the best that they don't trip while brushing their teeth.

You should be banned for that comment. Not only was it horrible, I will now be afraid of bath mats and tooth brushes

Guffy · 23-07-2015 11:33PM

In Exile wrote: »

You should be banned for that comment. Not only was it horrible, I will now be afraid of bath mats and tooth brushes

:D:D:D

Son Of A Vidic · 23-07-2015 11:54PM

In Exile wrote: »

You should be banned for that comment. Not only was it horrible, I will now be afraid of bath mats and tooth brushes

Maybe I should share some other stuff I've encountered with you:D:pac:. A guy was using a nail gun in the garden on some panel fencing and decided to nail gun his left testicle to his left thigh as you do. It wasn't an industrial sized nail gun, but a 1 & 1/2 inch nail is still no laughing matter. I suppose I'll leave it there before the site ban arrives.

The Weird, Wacky and Awesome World of the NFL - General Banter thread V2

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