Weirdest chat up line

Witchie · 01-02-2015 02:30AM #1

At a friend's birthday party and a guy about half my age was chatting to me and quite obviously flirting then said:

You will be in your bed soon with your feet burnt by the bulb.

I just laughed.

What is the weirdest chat up line you have used or had used on you?

wretcheddomain · 01-02-2015 02:31AM

When Linda Martin sang Get Lucky to me live from Saturday Night Show studios.

Iranoutofideas · 01-02-2015 02:33AM

Do you want to go halves on a bastard?

Birneybau · 01-02-2015 02:34AM

Can I smell your fanny?

No!

It must be your feet then.

The Backwards Man · 01-02-2015 02:34AM

I use 'Do you want to buy a load of turf?' on tinder, works a charm.

Sold three load so far.

thelad95 · 01-02-2015 02:34AM

You must make milkshake because I was in your yard last night.

eternal · 01-02-2015 02:37AM

'Do you want to dance?'
'No.'
'Suppose a blowjob's out of the question then.' (50 year old guy to 17 year old me)

'I was thinking of something exciting to say to you but by the time I got over here, I couldn't
remember what is was.' (My second cousin who didn't recognise me and went blood red when I told him who I was)

Random asshole in Kilkenny grabbing my breast on the street: 'I'd like a nice, comfortable hole to slip into.'

pablo128 · 01-02-2015 02:39AM

Hows your belly for a lodger?

Talib Fiasco · 01-02-2015 02:42AM

"Hey my d*ck just died, can I bury it in your arse?". It's weird because it works.

Kovu · 01-02-2015 02:47AM

Him- ''F**k me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name Aishling?''
Me- "No...."
Him-

EoghanIRL · 01-02-2015 02:48AM

Everytime you look away I take a hair and add it to my collection .

wardy2 · 01-02-2015 02:57AM

does this smell like chloroform to you?

CJ Haughey · 01-02-2015 02:58AM

I have a front grab.

NachoBusiness · 01-02-2015 03:13AM

I'm not Asian but I'd still like to eat your pussy.

Hi, can I have your number?
No, I have a boyfriend.
I have a maths exam next week.
'Maths exam'? What?
Sorry, weren't we talking about things we were going to cheat on?

AndonHandon · 01-02-2015 03:18AM

"I refuse to pay for water".
Your man was bent as fcuk, small, fat and on the dole.

jamesbere · 01-02-2015 04:09AM

EoghanIRL wrote: »

Everytime you look away I take a hair and add it to my collection .

Charming

Wang King · 01-02-2015 04:22AM

Many years ago I had a woman come up to me and tell me I looked like the gay lad off Fair City
It was unusual....but it worked for her

The Sidewards Man · 01-02-2015 04:27AM

Do you think I could borrow that dress sometime?

Purple Mountain · 01-02-2015 04:31AM

You're smashing...

I ran for the hills pretty quickly!!

RWCNT · 01-02-2015 01:35PM

Some lad in Ibiza to my ex years ago -

"Excuse me, what perfume are you wearing?"
"I'm not wearing any"
"Well you must smell ****ing good in bed then!"

Macavity. · 01-02-2015 01:57PM

Me: Are you from Tennessee?
Her: (unimpressed) Why, because I'm the only ten you see? :rolleyes:
Me: No, it's just you've got a real inbred look about you.

AlanS181824 · 01-02-2015 02:04PM

One I heard before.

"Are you a swan? Cos you have skinny legs and fat arse!"

Charming right?

Potential Underachiever · 01-02-2015 06:01PM

'I'm looking for somewhere warm to park the willy wagon tonight'

'Nice legs, what time do they open at?'

'See my mate over there (point), her (yeah), he wants to know if you fancy me.