Can I be a Godparent even if I am not Catholic?

lazygal · 05-11-2014 03:18PM

Manach wrote: »

And the victomology begins, pardon while I put the violins on the background.

Whilst I decline to take social advise for such quarters I can admire the relentless drive to undercut to underpinnings of society to make them amenable to change, subjectivity and eventual obsolescence. Cultureal PCism at its finest. By continuously raising the hue and cry of the "but what of X", the aim is to make the actual ceremonies less common or de-evolved to pale, shallow copies.

So if you don't have church ceremonies for weddings, children and death, all you're doing is having pale, shallow copies of the real thing?
Nice rant btw. But I'm still married, right? Even though we didn't have a church wedding?

eviltwin · 05-11-2014 03:29PM

Festus wrote: »

With respect to your wedding you may find this Huffington post article of some interest.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/bethany-blankley/how-protestantism-redefined-marriage_b_1510654.html

Ah right so in the eyes of the religious a non church wedding will never be good enough, well that's okay, I think we're used to religious people being on their moral high horse looking down at the rest of us. Personally I don't care. I have no interest in the church having any place in my life especially on what is meant to be a family celebration. I had my marriage in a registry office, its legally binding so in the eyes of the state we have the rights we wanted, everyone - even those people we know who are religious funnily enough - consider us married and most importantly WE know we are married. A church to you might be a very emotional and spiritual environment but to me and my husband ( can I call him that?

) its just a building, it has no more significance than a house or the local community centre.

Festus · 05-11-2014 03:41PM

Your are in a Christian forum on a thread that is discussing a Christian sacrament. Why do you get so upset when people explain the facts and God's plan to you?

eviltwin · 05-11-2014 03:45PM

Festus wrote: »

Your are in a Christian forum on a thread that is discussing a Christian sacrament. Why do you get so upset when people explain the facts and God's plan to you?

God's plan is fine for those who believe in God. I don't. I don't need to seeing as how alternatives exist. I'm not upset by your comments, you're entitled to your opinion. Funny its always the Christians who look down at other people. You're no more married than I am if you choose to get married in a church.

lazybones32 · 05-11-2014 04:00PM

katydid wrote: »

No, the official function is to ensure that the child gets religious guidance. You can do that without giving them instruction yourself.

Apologies. The responsibility lies with the Godparent, then.

lulu1 wrote: »

In all honesty can any god parent see themselves going round to their brother/sister/friends house and instructing their child in religion because their parents dont.

But that's kind of the point: why accept responsibility for something you have no intention of ever fulfilling and - in the OP's case - don't believe?

I wouldn't make a 'promise' I have no intention of keeping, much less make a religious promise/commitment if I neither believed in God or intended to keep it.

Just because (maybe) a lot of Irish people don't understand and appreciate what Baptism actually is, doesn't justify abusing* it or making a mockery of it.

*abuse - to use something to bad effect, misuse or using it for purpose not intended for.

PopePalpatine · 05-11-2014 04:02PM

Manach wrote: »

And the victomology begins, pardon while I put the violins on the background.

That's a bit rich coming from you, where any whittling away of Catholic supremacy in this State is condemned as "anti-Catholic" by you.

MojoRisinnnn · 05-11-2014 04:04PM

I'm a godparent and in no way religious

Festus · 05-11-2014 04:23PM

eviltwin wrote: »

God's plan is fine for those who believe in God. I don't. I don't need to seeing as how alternatives exist. I'm not upset by your comments, you're entitled to your opinion. Funny its always the Christians who look down at other people. You're no more married than I am if you choose to get married in a church.

if you don't believe in God what are you bringing to a discussion on a Christian sacrament?

PopePalpatine · 05-11-2014 04:25PM

Festus wrote: »

if you don't believe in God what are you bringing to a discussion on a Christian sacrament?

The OP also doesn't believe in God and he started this whole discussion, why not take the issue up with him?

eviltwin · 05-11-2014 04:29PM

Festus wrote: »

if you don't believe in God what are you bringing to a discussion on a Christian sacrament?

Because this is a discussion forum and I have experience of being a non religious godparent

BizzyC · 05-11-2014 04:30PM

I'm an athiest and a god parent, and I don't see any conflict there.

The role of a godparent is to support the child and help them to develop in their faith.

As my nephew grows up, if he needs support or help in any way from me in pursuing his faith I'll be happy to support him.
You don't have to be the person driving his faith, you just have to be available and willing to help if he needs/wants it.

eviltwin · 05-11-2014 04:33PM

I would tell anyone in the OP's situation to do whatever feels right for them. I wouldn't worry about it if I wanted to accept but felt I shouldn't. The people who have the biggest responsibility to the child are its parents and seeing as how so many of them get their child baptised and never set foot in a church again I'm sure they won't mind that you aren't religious, any parent who is religious will probably not ask a non religious person to be godparent in the first place.

Benny_Cake · 05-11-2014 08:41PM

Mod: People, can we leave the culture wars elsewhere, please? The OP asked a reasonable question, keep things on topic.

Manach wrote: »

Which shows how the policies of divisional identity is so inherent in this post-modern Ireland. To expect the parents to confirm to whatever group identification so as make the ceremony of baptism less relevant with whatever fad a naming "ceremony" which presumable is of humanist/usual suspects origins, both a pale imitation and to yet another attempt undercut any religious connection so as to purge the event of any meaning and by that implication any tradition or cultural ties.

Referring to a way of marking a life event as a "fad" simply because it's newer and different than one's own traditions isn't on. Please refrain from it.

PopePalpatine wrote: »

That's a bit rich coming from you, where any whittling away of Catholic supremacy in this State is condemned as "anti-Catholic" by you.

If there were issues between you and another poster elsewhere, please don't drag them up here.

Benny_Cake · 05-11-2014 09:11PM

I think the OP is showing a high level of respect for what is a Catholic sacrament after all, not simply a community event. I wouldn't judge anyone for a second if they decided to go ahead as a godparent - it's a huge honour after all - but I've a lot of time for someone who does their homework and makes a decision based on principle rather than convenience.

katydid · 08-11-2014 10:08PM

BizzyC wrote: »

I'm an athiest and a god parent, and I don't see any conflict there..

How did you handle making the statements at the baptism ceremony where you were asked about your beliefs? Presumably you had to lie. Not good example for your godson.

Mark Tapley · 08-11-2014 11:37PM

katydid wrote: »

How did you handle making the statements at the baptism ceremony where you were asked about your beliefs? Presumably you had to lie. Not good example for your godson.

Matthew 7:1-3King James Version (KJV)

7 Judge not, that ye be not judged.
2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.
3 And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?

eviltwin · 08-11-2014 11:41PM

katydid wrote: »

How did you handle making the statements at the baptism ceremony where you were asked about your beliefs? Presumably you had to lie. Not good example for your godson.

The kid is probably a couple of months old. He will be okay.

katydid · 08-11-2014 11:46PM

Mark Tapley wrote: »

Matthew 7:1-3King James Version (KJV)

7 Judge not, that ye be not judged.
2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.
3 And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?

I'm not judging. You DID lie if you said in the ceremony that you believed in God and rejected the Devil and all his works.

Lying is not a good example to a child.

Those are facts.

katydid · 08-11-2014 11:47PM

eviltwin wrote: »

The kid is probably a couple of months old. He will be okay.

When he grows up, and finds out the person he presumably looks up to deliberately lied, he will surely be disappointed.

eviltwin · 08-11-2014 11:52PM

katydid wrote: »

When he grows up, and finds out the person he presumably looks up to deliberately lied, he will surely be disappointed.

Better not tell him about Santa Claus or the tooth fairy so

lazygal · 09-11-2014 10:11AM

eviltwin wrote: »

Better not tell him about Santa Claus or the tooth fairy so

Lots of parents don't. I'm very uncomfortable about the Santa Claus thing myself. I love the festive season but I'm very unsure about how to navigate lying about Santa. In fact, some Christians don't celebrate Christmas at all or have Santa deliver presents.

eviltwin · 09-11-2014 11:56AM

lazygal wrote: »

Lots of parents don't. I'm very uncomfortable about the Santa Claus thing myself. I love the festive season but I'm very unsure about how to navigate lying about Santa. In fact, some Christians don't celebrate Christmas at all or have Santa deliver presents.

Nothing wrong with that. I just find it amusing that the lying argument is used when talking about non religious grandparents. Most of these kids will be lied to throughout their life. In fact seeing as how few families bringing their children to be baptised will even bother with mass surely the biggest liars are the parents.

katydid · 09-11-2014 06:04PM

eviltwin wrote: »

Better not tell him about Santa Claus or the tooth fairy so

There's a bit of a difference between telling stories and swearing in a church in front of witnesses that you believe in God when you don't.

katydid · 09-11-2014 06:13PM

lazygal wrote: »

Lots of parents don't. I'm very uncomfortable about the Santa Claus thing myself. I love the festive season but I'm very unsure about how to navigate lying about Santa. In fact, some Christians don't celebrate Christmas at all or have Santa deliver presents.

I think that things like fairy stories and Santa Claus are myths. All civilisations have myths and use them for different purposes; to explain life, to ask questions, or to prepare children for adult realities. If we dismiss myths, we should dismiss fiction writing for adults too...

Other than fundamentalist Christians, most Christians understand that the Bible is a collection of myths; but the difference is that we don't tell children bible stories, or we don't read them ourselves, in the fundamental knowledge that they are not true, like Snow White or Puss in Boots. We read them and teach them as ways of explaining greater truths, truths which are in many ways beyond our understanding.

So I don't see a contradiction in being a believing Christian who accepts that the Scripture brings the truth through myths, and telling children fairy stories and fantasies you know not to be true. Different functions.

shruikan2553 · 09-11-2014 06:26PM

I would guess the reaction you get would depend on the parents views. If they are actual Catholics and follow the religion then they would probably be ok with you explaining you arent a Catholic or Christian. If the parents are doing it to please their own parents or for a day out and wont see a church until the child's communion then they would probably think you are being rude or something.

katydid wrote: »

There's a bit of a difference between telling stories and swearing in a church in front of witnesses that you believe in God when you don't.

Not to a person who doesnt believe in god.

eviltwin · 09-11-2014 06:39PM

katydid wrote: »

There's a bit of a difference between telling stories and swearing in a church in front of witnesses that you believe in God when you don't.

Why? The parents make the same promise. Not such a big deal though. Funny that :rolleyes:

katydid · 09-11-2014 07:35PM

shruikan2553 wrote: »

I would guess the reaction you get would depend on the parents views. If they are actual Catholics and follow the religion then they would probably be ok with you explaining you arent a Catholic or Christian. If the parents are doing it to please their own parents or for a day out and wont see a church until the child's communion then they would probably think you are being rude or something.

Not to a person who doesnt believe in god.

Are you suggesting that people who don't believe in God have no compunction in swearing something they believe not to be true? You don't think much of the ethical standards of atheists, do you?

katydid · 09-11-2014 07:35PM

Manach wrote: »

Or perhaps to illustrate the failure to understand the honour being done in the invite as a mark of social occasion and standing within the community.

What has that got to do with the fact that some people don't feel able, in all conscience, to fulfil that honour?

katydid · 09-11-2014 07:37PM

eviltwin wrote: »

Why? The parents make the same promise. Not such a big deal though. Funny that :rolleyes:

Of course it's a big deal. Swearing that you believe in something you don't believe in is unethical, no matter who you are.

Parents who don't believe in God should not be hypocritial and have their children christened, and they certainly shouldn't stand there and make declarations they don't mean. What kind of start in life is that for the child, having your parents behaving hypocritically and unethically from the get-go?

shruikan2553 · 09-11-2014 07:57PM

katydid wrote: »

Are you suggesting that people who don't believe in God have no compunction in swearing something they believe not to be true? You don't think much of the ethical standards of atheists, do you?

I dont think much of the ethical standards of most people regardless of religion or lack of. For someone who doesnt believe in god there is no difference between saying santa is real and god is real.

Swearing things you dont believe or will do is a common theme for many people taking part in sacraments. Nobody is being harmed by a person saying they believe in God when they dont. The event goes on and they get their piece of paper so that their child isnt at the bottom of the list for school, they get a party and the grandparents are kept happy.

Can I be a Godparent even if I am not Catholic?

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