What is your current life struggle?

LynnGrace · 15-04-2014 07:53PM

Czarcasm wrote: »

I used to be terrible for my inability to say 'no' to people, and then I got good at it when I started to tell myself it was ok to say no to people and it was ok to be selfish, take time out and concentrate on putting myself first.

But it's slowly creeping back into my life again now this inability to say no to people, because I'm not happy leaving stuff unfinished, incomplete, or "putting it off till tomorrow" (I have other shìt planned for tomorrow already), and I know if I don't get it under control and implement a proper time management system and stop taking on shìt, I'll snap, again, and then I'll get bored not doing stuff, and then I'll throw myself into stuff again because I'm afraid that they'll get someone else to do the job and that person will make a balls of it.

I hate the control-freak, micro-managing, people pleasing perfectionist nature of my personality that preaches that there's nothing wrong with failure, yet I'm shìte at taking my own advice.

This is very similar, for me, and it has affected my health.
Am working on changing what I can, in my approach.

Wompa1 · 15-04-2014 08:10PM

Work stress. Tight deadlines, lots of work, no help. Waking up with my heart racing every morning, anxious. Employers told me to submit to present at some big conferences, I did and got picked to present on three topics but I'm not being given the time to actually put my presentations together. I've been working pretty much every hour of the day, every day.

But whatever, got to get on with it.

Ilyana 2.0 · 15-04-2014 08:15PM

Exams looming for a course I'm starting to hate. No motivation to do my assignments or study, but the fear of disappointing people. A chronic lack of time, especially with a crappy weekend job. Trying to see my boyfriend when we both have manic schedules. College friends seemingly turning against me, although I have no idea idea why.

They're all fairly trivial things but cumulatively, they all add up. I'm trying to do nice things for myself every couple of days, like watching a movie in bed, or making myself a nice dinner. It makes things slightly less crap!

15-04-2014 08:21PM

Nothing really.

Had a pretty sh*t year last year and couldn't imagine how happy and grand I'd be now. Can't complain about anything really. There are small things, but meh!

thegreatgonzo · 15-04-2014 08:26PM

I have exams coming up in 3 weeks, that's not so bad itself but it's hard to find the headspace to study. I come home a lot to my parents because my dad has alzheimers and my mom is elderly and they can't manage the farm alone. It was a particularly hard spring for us work wise and I missed a fair bit of college due to the farm, driving my parents to hospital appointments and getting sick myself. I have one sibling that refuses to help out and is quite abusive sometimes and another who lives far away and is extremely busy so I don't get away from the situation often. Hopefully when I'm finally qualified later this year I'll be lucky enough to get a job and get back to where I was a few years ago, what I miss far more than money is just being able to hang out with friends and have a laugh.

15-04-2014 08:30PM

Ficheall wrote: »

I spent almost five years worrying about my viva at the end, because there were so many questions they could have asked that could have easily tripped me and ended up costing me everything I'd worked for. Then viva day came and I was giddy with excitement - one way or the other I was finished working on the PhD and worrying about it. I gave the best presentation I've ever given, the question session afterwards was just like a chat and they didn't ask me any difficult questions, and then I was free*!!!

So don't stress about it - you've the hardest part of the work done, and it looks really bad on them if you fail, so everyone will do their utmost not to let that happen. Be grand!

I'm actually quite confident, but I just want it over. Over, over, over!!!. I'm exhausted worrying about it!

*I've since started a postdoc which I'm not enjoying at all, and don't have the balls to quit, but that's another story...

This is both my worst nightmare and a distinct possibility!

--LOS-- · 15-04-2014 08:31PM

Bell's Palsy (or ells alsy as it should be called). One side of my face has been paralysed for a week now, lawd knows how long it will last, one of my eyes stays opened permanently so that I'm forever winking at everyone, I have to tape it shut at night, fun! My taste is really affected, eating's hard, drinking's hard, my speech is somewhat affected, not to mention how goofy it makes you look and the ignorance you have to deal with from people because of that. And I've had nothing but conflicting advice from doctors. Then today when I was walking home some lad was shouting at me from a bike, I figured either he's just another sexist arsehole or he's being ignorant about my face, nope, I looked down when I got home and realised my fly was opened :P Damn language barrier. I can't wait to do a class presentation next week with it ¬_¬ Overall though it's not a big problem, just an annoying thing to have, trouble is I'm pretty sure I have it from being run-down, not eating, not sleeping, not looking after myself because of a much bigger issue, depression. Add to that how hard it is to do a masters at the same time, it's like climbing everest at the moment. On the bright side (which I feel like I should add for such a gloomy post!) I am getting help and I am optimistic, and sometimes I catch my face in the mirror and just cannot stop laughing at how stupid I look

15-04-2014 08:34PM

--LOS-- wrote: »

Bell's Palsy (or ells alsy as it should be called). One side of my face has been paralysed for a week now, lawd knows how long it will last, one of my eyes stays opened permanently so that I'm forever winking at everyone, I have to tape it shut at night, fun! My taste is really affected, eating's hard, drinking's hard, my speech is somewhat affected, not to mention how goofy it makes you look and the ignorance you have to deal with from people because of that. And I've had nothing but conflicting advice from doctors. Then today when I was walking home some lad was shouting at me from a bike, I figured either he's just another sexist arsehole or he's being ignorant about my face, nope, I looked down when I got home and realised my fly was opened :P Damn language barrier. I can't wait to do a class presentation next week with it ¬_¬ Overall though it's not a big problem, just an annoying thing to have, trouble is I'm pretty sure I have it from being run-down, not eating, not sleeping, not looking after myself because of a much bigger issue, depression. Add to that how hard it is to do a masters at the same time, it's like climbing everest at the moment. On the bright side (which I feel like I should add for such a gloomy post!) I am getting help and I am optimistic, and sometimes I catch my face in the mirror and just cannot stop laughing at how stupid I look

You poor thing. A friend had Bells Palsy in school, it disappeared as abruptly as it appeared. I hope the same for you.

shuyin1 · 15-04-2014 08:42PM

Garrigai wrote: »

6 months into a three and a half year contract and I hate my job

trainee a/c :P

--LOS-- · 15-04-2014 08:44PM

Candie wrote: »

You poor thing. A friend had Bells Palsy in school, it disappeared as abruptly as it appeared. I hope the same for you.

ye hopefully it'll be over in a few weeks like most people, one doctor was making it sound like it might never go which was making me feel sorry for myself but I think it's just one of those things where there's a lot of conflicting ideas on causes and treatments, I'm pretty confident myself it'll sort itself out soon. Thank you!

Donkey Oaty · 15-04-2014 08:44PM

--LOS-- wrote: »

not sleeping

That's a biggie. Tackle that, and the other issues will definitely be easier to deal with.

pow wow · 15-04-2014 09:01PM

Both my parents have the same type of rare cancer - one is in remission, the other has just been diagnosed. I would laugh at the irony of it if it weren't so serious! Puts all my work/social/life worries in perspective though.

--LOS-- · 15-04-2014 09:05PM

Donkey Oaty wrote: »

That's a biggie. Tackle that, and the other issues will definitely be easier to deal with.

working on it

I can also confirm that your eye does not pop out if you sneeze with your eye open!

15-04-2014 09:06PM

pow wow wrote: »

Both my parents have the same type of rare cancer - one is in remission, the other has just been diagnosed. I would laugh at the irony of it if it weren't so serious! Puts all my work/social/life worries in perspective though.

That's some burden there.

Best of luck with it all. Hope you manage ok with it.

princess-lala · 15-04-2014 09:11PM

I just want the pains to go away so I can leave hospital and go home and get back to work.

3 months of pains and got my diagnosis, now they dunno how to fix me enough to allow me home.

Jesus I just want my life back!!

thegreatgonzo · 15-04-2014 09:27PM

--LOS-- wrote: »

ye hopefully it'll be over in a few weeks like most people, one doctor was making it sound like it might never go which was making me feel sorry for myself but I think it's just one of those things where there's a lot of conflicting ideas on causes and treatments, I'm pretty confident myself it'll sort itself out soon. Thank you!

I knew someone who had it too, she was terrified but made a complete recovery after a short while:)

misspumpqueen · 15-04-2014 09:34PM

My ex is constantly trying to emotionally manipulate me. I'm uber proud of myself that I can see past his bullsiht!

Neyite · 15-04-2014 09:48PM

lily09 wrote: »

My current life struggle is that i have my first apt with the pregnancy loss clinic this week after 3 miscarraiges in 8 months. Each one has slowly broken me down but I believe things will get better.

Best of luck on your appointment. Mine is next month, and I really hope that there are answers, and also hopefully drugs that will get me duffed and keep me duffed.

My other life struggle is work related. Hopefully I can resolve that one too.

seenitall · 15-04-2014 10:00PM

thegreatgonzo wrote: »

I knew someone who had it too, she was terrified but made a complete recovery after a short while:)

I had it when I was in college as well, one side of face turned to stone kinda. No blinking on one eye either. A bit scary.

Got prescribed B vitamin daily, AFAIR. The thing went within a couple of weeks.

Hulk Hands · 15-04-2014 10:37PM

c_man wrote: »

I feel pretty lonely most of the time tbh.

You know your GAA iirc? Would you consider getting involved with training a team in the local club? They're always on the lookout for more trainers

The One Doctor · 15-04-2014 10:54PM

No life struggles right now. Is struggling to have a life struggle a life struggle?

Pawn · 15-04-2014 10:55PM

mike_ie wrote: »

What about you? Air your life's struggle.

Life is my struggle.

anncoates · 15-04-2014 11:01PM

Trying to be a right on caring parent and not throw my eldest son head - first from an upstairs window.

therealme · 15-04-2014 11:04PM

Struggling business, 2 more years repayments on business loan, single, orphaned & facing cardboard city.

Working 60 hours at least per week & not taking a wage.I'm tired, so tired of it all. Close to breaking point.

15-04-2014 11:06PM

therealme wrote: »

Struggling business, 2 more years repayments on business loan, single, orphaned & facing cardboard city.

Working 60 hours at least per week & not taking a wage.I'm tired, so tired of it all. Close to breaking point.

Don't wait until you're broken, garner all the support you can now. I hope it gets better for you.

therealme · 15-04-2014 11:09PM

Candie wrote: »

Don't wait until you're broken, garner all the support you can now. I hope it gets better for you.

Thanks Candie.I have tried but everybody has their own problems & things to deal with. I really hope so too, this is not how I thought life would be.

15-04-2014 11:11PM

I have to say this thread really gives me perspective on my petty issues. So many people are struggling with real life-changing and even life-threatening stuff.

I've a lot of respect for how people are managing and coming through so many difficult situations here.

Butterface · 15-04-2014 11:16PM

My only struggle at the moment is college-related (finishing thesis), and while it can be frustrating, I don't feel stressed out about it.

Reading the struggles of others here tonight really does put those minor things into perspective. I wish all the best for those undergoing stressful situations at the moment!

Savage Tyrant · 15-04-2014 11:40PM

I despise my job, but as I have no prospect of another one, I am stuck in it...
I struggle massively with my mood (depression) and cant control my anger. I despise myself as a person.
I have 7 kids, 4 of my own and 3 step kids, and i know im a bad role model for them.
I wish i was someone else.... I feel like I'm living someone else's life...

lufties · 15-04-2014 11:45PM

Savage Tyrant wrote: »

I despise my job, but as I have no prospect of another one, I am stuck in it...
I struggle massively with my mood (depression) and cant control my anger. I despise myself as a person.
I have 7 kids, 4 of my own and 3 step kids, and i know im a bad role model for them.
I wish i was someone else.... I feel like I'm living someone else's life...

Don't be too hard on yourself. A relative of mine recently took his own life, a perfect role model he was, everthing he did was to perfection, and was considered a rock in people's lives. Now he's gone, leaving behind a young family.

Nobody is perfect, and blaming yourself doesn't help.

What is your current life struggle?

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