76 Things Banned in Leviticus- how many have you done?

efb · 06-01-2014 12:48AM

Muise... wrote: »

just aN/Al so?

lol

EuropeanSon · 06-01-2014 12:51AM

34. Just short of half, guess there's a lot of things I need to start having sex with and/or eating.

mightybashful · 06-01-2014 12:51AM

.

whatdoicare · 06-01-2014 01:05AM

Im actually astounded that even though I never go to mass I actually managed to break the not go to mass within 66 days of giving birth to a girl!!

I went with my elderly granny to Christmas eve mass as my Dad who usually brings her was laid up with his back.

Score! I got one without trying....wonder why its only a girl?

JuliusCaesar · 06-01-2014 01:12AM

20 or so.

Glad to see there's no prohibition on women sleeping with - almost anyone really.

Eeden · 06-01-2014 01:16AM

efb wrote: »

23. Going to church within 33 days after giving birth to a boy (12:4)

24. Going to church within 66 days after giving birth to a girl (12:5)

...giving birth to a girl is obviously much worse ("unclean") than giving birth to a boy... figure that one out!

J_E · 06-01-2014 01:16AM

About 32, well proud of myself!

"38. Giving your children to be sacrificed to Molek (18:21)"

This one sounds a bit sinister!

Duck Soup · 06-01-2014 01:24AM

Number 21. What's a skink?

Gyalist · 06-01-2014 01:25AM

Manach wrote: »

Possibly breaking the ones responding to trolls by pointing out the bible has to be put into the context of a living faith tradition, which holds that moral laws such as Moses commandments are immutable but disciplinary requirements are customs and so can be changed. This has been the case for about 2000 years now.

It's remarkable how so many people who clearly have little or no knowledge of the subject suddenly become online experts in Biblical hermeneutics.

J_E · 06-01-2014 01:25AM

Duck Soup wrote: »

Number 21. What's a skink?

Some sort of lizard apparently!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skink

smcgiff · 06-01-2014 01:28AM

Sleeping with your own slave seems to be grand.

My favourite is the mixing of materials one. I assumed this was brought in by some savvy businessman who was having no truck with innovation and was happy to leave things as they were.

What Christians will tell you is that it's all grand since Jesus did his thing, because the NT supersedes the OT and OT laws no longer apply.

But that doesn't take away from their (I'm removing the adjective I'd like due to the blasphemy law) god demanding these laws at some stage.

But, to be fair I think the original Boy Wonder mentions homosexual acts in the NT.

Cookie_Monster · 06-01-2014 01:30AM

3. Eating fat (3:17)

so every human ever then needs to be killed to death for wrongdoing against god

the_syco · 06-01-2014 01:31AM

efb wrote: »

1. Burning any yeast or honey in offerings to God (2:11) No, as that's a waste

2. Failing to include salt in offerings to God (2:13) Done

3. Eating fat (3:17) Done

4. Eating blood (3:17) Done (black pudding; if you ever had a proper "Irish Breakfast", you had this!)

5. Failing to testify against any wrongdoing you’ve witnessed (5:1) Done

6. Failing to testify against any wrongdoing you’ve been told about (5:1) Done

7. Touching an unclean animal (5:2) Done

8. Carelessly making an oath (5:4) Done

9. Deceiving a neighbour about something trusted to them (6:2) Unknown

10. Finding lost property and lying about it (6:3) Done

11. Bringing unauthorised fire before God (10:1) Done

12. Letting your hair become unkempt (10:6) Done

13. Tearing your clothes (10:6) Done

14. Drinking alcohol in holy places (bit of a problem for Catholics, this ‘un) (10:9) Done

15. Eating an animal which doesn’t both chew cud and has a divided hoof (cf: camel, rabbit, pig) (11:4-7) Done

16. Touching the carcass of any of the above (problems here for rugby) (11:8) Done

17. Eating – or touching the carcass of – any seafood without fins or scales (11:10-12) Done

18. Eating – or touching the carcass of - eagle, the vulture, the black vulture, the red kite, any kind of black kite, any kind of raven, the horned owl, the screech owl, the gull, any kind of hawk, the little owl, the cormorant, the great owl, the white owl, the desert owl, the osprey, the stork, any kind of heron, the hoopoe and the bat. (11:13-19) Done

19. Eating – or touching the carcass of – flying insects with four legs, unless those legs are jointed (11:20-22) Done; when cycling, this happens

20. Eating any animal which walks on all four and has paws (good news for cats) (11:27) No

21. Eating – or touching the carcass of – the weasel, the rat, any kind of great lizard, the gecko, the monitor lizard, the wall lizard, the skink and the chameleon (11:29) Not yet

22. Eating – or touching the carcass of – any creature which crawls on many legs, or its belly (11:41-42) Done

23. Going to church within 33 days after giving birth to a boy (12:4) I'm a dude, so no

24. Going to church within 66 days after giving birth to a girl (12:5) I'm a dude, so also no

25. Having sex with your mother (18:7) No

26. Having sex with your father’s wife (18:8) No

27. Having sex with your sister (18:9) No

28. Having sex with your granddaughter (18:10) No

29. Having sex with your half-sister (18:11) No

30. Having sex with your biological aunt (18:12-13) No

31. Having sex with your uncle’s wife (18:14) No

32. Having sex with your daughter-in-law (18:15) No

33. Having sex with your sister-in-law (18:16) No

34. Having sex with a woman and also having sex with her daughter or granddaughter (bad news for Alan Clark) (18:17) No

35. Marrying your wife’s sister while your wife still lives (18:18) No

36. Having sex with a woman during her period (18:19) No

37. Having sex with your neighbour’s wife (18:20) No

38. Giving your children to be sacrificed to Molek (18:21) No

39. Having sex with a man “as one does with a woman” (18:22) No

40. Having sex with an animal (18:23) No

41. Making idols or “metal gods” (19:4) Done

42. Reaping to the very edges of a field (19:9) No

43. Picking up grapes that have fallen in your vineyard (19:10)Done

44. Stealing (19:11) Done (apples from an apple tree)

45. Lying (19:11) Done

46. Swearing falsely on God’s name (19:12) Done

47. Defrauding your neighbour (19:13) No

48. Holding back the wages of an employee overnight (not well observed these days) (19:13) Done

49. Cursing the deaf or abusing the blind (19:14) Done

50. Perverting justice, showing partiality to either the poor or the rich (19:15) Done

51. Spreading slander (19:16) Done

52. Doing anything to endanger a neighbour’s life (19:16) No

53. Seeking revenge or bearing a grudge (19:18) Done

54. Mixing fabrics in clothing (19:19) Done

55. Cross-breeding animals (19:19) No

56. Planting different seeds in the same field (19:19) Done

57. Sleeping with another man’s slave (19:20) No

58. Eating fruit from a tree within four years of planting it (19:23) Done

59. Practising divination or seeking omens (tut, tut astrology) (19:26) Done

60. Trimming your beard (19:27) Done

61. Cutting your hair at the sides (19:27) Done

62. Getting tattoos (19:28) Not yet, but plan to

63. Making your daughter prostitute herself (19:29) No

64. Turning to mediums or spiritualists (19:31) You mean like priests? Hell no!

65. Not standing in the presence of the elderly (19:32) Done

66. Mistreating foreigners – “the foreigner residing among you must be treated as your native-born” (19:33-34) Done

67. Using dishonest weights and scales (19:35-36) Done

68. Cursing your father or mother (punishable by death) (20:9) Done

69. Marrying a prostitute, divorcee or widow if you are a priest (21:7,13) No

70. Entering a place where there’s a dead body as a priest (21:11) No

71. Slaughtering a cow/sheep and its young on the same day (22:28) No

72. Working on the Sabbath (23:3) Done

73. Blasphemy (punishable by stoning to death) (24:14) Done

74. Inflicting an injury; killing someone else’s animal; killing a person must be punished in kind (24:17-22) No

75. Selling land permanently (25:23) No

76. Selling an Israelite as a slave (foreigners are fine) (25:42) No

Jaysus christ, I see why the Romans decided to nail most of the them to the cross! No fun at all.

Penny Tration · 06-01-2014 01:48AM

14. I'm too well behaved!

_Redzer_ · 06-01-2014 02:12AM

BrokenArrows wrote: »

They really had to work hard to come up with some of those rules.
54. Mixing fabrics in clothing (19:19). What could the reasoning be for that?

It's God. He doesn't seem to know wtf he's on about

_Redzer_ · 06-01-2014 02:19AM

smcgiff wrote: »

Sleeping with your own slave seems to be grand.

My favourite is the mixing of materials one. I assumed this was brought in by some savvy businessman who was having no truck with innovation and was happy to leave things as they were.

What Christians will tell you is that it's all grand since Jesus did his thing, because the NT supersedes the OT and OT laws no longer apply.

But that doesn't take away from their (I'm removing the adjective I'd like due to the blasphemy law) god demanding these laws at some stage.

But, to be fair I think the original Boy Wonder mentions homosexual acts in the NT.

Jesus actually never mentioned homosexuality in any way, shape or form

Phill Ewinn · 06-01-2014 02:54AM

41. Putting tomatoes in a fruit salad (24:7)

bnagrrl · 06-01-2014 02:55AM

29 :cool:

AlmightyCushion · 06-01-2014 02:58AM

I'm going to make this my bucket list.

Slutmonkey57b · 06-01-2014 03:08AM

"This thing reads like the ramblings of a drugged horse"

efb · 06-01-2014 08:54AM

smcgiff wrote: »

Sleeping with your own slave seems to be grand.

My favourite is the mixing of materials one. I assumed this was brought in by some savvy businessman who was having no truck with innovation and was happy to leave things as they were.

What Christians will tell you is that it's all grand since Jesus did his thing, because the NT supersedes the OT and OT laws no longer apply.

But that doesn't take away from their (I'm removing the adjective I'd like due to the blasphemy law) god demanding these laws at some stage.

But, to be fair I think the original Boy Wonder mentions homosexual acts in the NT.

He doesn't. St Paul does though

Sunglasses Ron · 06-01-2014 09:44AM

At what point did the Roman church decide that the first half of the bible was largely irrelevant yet still to be kept in the bible, and that the only "real" parts came from Jesus and the Pope?

That is the funny thing about Catholicism vs fundamentalist Protestantism. I've not once met a devout Catholic who can reel off numbered biblical quotations like Dot Cotton and the Southern US preachers like to do. I don't think my nan even owns an actual bible. Certainly owns a pocket sized prayer book or two, but Catholics seem to place sod all stock in the old skool Jewish parts of the bible!

I would guess it stems from the old rule of having a Latin mass. It was hard enough to keep up with and repeat a dozen or so of the most common prayers, let alone learn how to read an entire bible in Latin.

smcgiff · 06-01-2014 10:21AM

efb wrote: »

He doesn't. St Paul does though

You're right, although he does mention something about old laws and it's vague enough for those that want to read it a certain way to interpret to suit their agenda.

Might make sense considering Jesus was not wed, which would have been highly unusual at the time for a man into his 30's.

Orlaw3136 · 06-01-2014 10:48AM

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

I'm going to make this my bucket list.

Your sister, half-sister, aunt/uncles wife, sister-in-law, daughter-in-law and grand-daughter are shuddering at the thought.

Orlaw3136 · 06-01-2014 10:49AM

Manach wrote: »

Possibly breaking the ones responding to trolls by pointing out the bible has to be put into the context of a living faith tradition, which holds that moral laws such as Moses commandments are immutable but disciplinary requirements are customs and so can be changed. This has been the case for about 2000 years now.

So...are you for or against shagging your grand-daughter/animals ?

iDave · 06-01-2014 10:57AM

53. Seeking revenge or bearing a grudge (19:18)

This could be a problem for the entire nation of Ireland

Archeron · 06-01-2014 10:58AM

Hi Molek? Archeron here. Look, really sorry about this but I have to get the kids back off you I'm afraid. Just read on the internet that it's apparently bad form to sacrifice them. Yeah, I know, I'm shocked too. I'll send you a muffin basket instead. Thanks, bye.

biko · 06-01-2014 11:03AM

Manach wrote: »

Possibly breaking the ones responding to trolls by pointing out the bible has to be put into the context of a living faith tradition, which holds that moral laws such as Moses commandments are immutable but disciplinary requirements are customs and so can be changed. This has been the case for about 2000 years now.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SfrO6LJyhII

For Forks Sake · 06-01-2014 11:09AM

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

I'm going to make this my bucket list.

You've informed your family to brace themselves for when you get around to no's 25-35 yet?

systemicrisk · 06-01-2014 11:19AM

_Redzer_ wrote: »

It's God. He doesn't seem to know wtf he's on about

If I was god I would wake up some mornings pissed off and ban a load of shít too.

Thou shalth not pray to me before I get at least a bucket of coffee into me in the morning because I aint ****ing listening.

Thou shalth be stoned to death if thou interupteth a man/woman's dinner to try and get him/her to switch energy providers.

Thou shalt spend all eternity in hell fire if thou sneezeth on your hands while serving in a shop and then proceed to touch the apple I am buying for my lunch.

76 Things Banned in Leviticus- how many have you done?

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