Moving out prank/general bastardness

SV · 24-10-2013 03:17AM #1

So here's the deal, I'm moving out of my current house at the end of next month and I'm looking for some way to annoy the one remaining housemate there.

Why? Well I think everyone who has moved out had that one annoying housemate, this guy is the ultimate one and I can't just let it go.

I've got one month, any ideas?

banquo · 24-10-2013 03:22AM

Fish inside the curtain pole.

They will never[/] be able to trace the source of the smell.

Mr. Chrome · 24-10-2013 03:24AM

Sprinkle grass seeds on a carpet and wet it. You'll have a nice lawn carpet by the time you move out :-)

SweepTheLeg · 24-10-2013 03:25AM

Say goodbye and wish him all the best. No point ending on a sour note with a stupid prank which could end up being dangerous.

Frosty McSnowballs · 24-10-2013 03:26AM

Microwave a poo before you leave. Then spread it under the corner of the carpet.

SV · 24-10-2013 03:31AM

SweepTheLeg wrote: »

Say goodbye and wish him all the best. No point ending on a sour note with a stupid prank which could end up being dangerous.

That's an awful prank.

Mr. Chrome · 24-10-2013 03:33AM

Senor Fancy Pants wrote: »

Microwave a poo before you leave. Then spread it under the corner of the carpet.

I know a guy who was asked to leave a house party because he was acting the knob, so he shat on a plate and put it in the microwave and set it for 15 minutes.
The smell ended the party :-D
We call him the party pooper!

wotswattage · 24-10-2013 03:35AM

A top decker. Crap in the cistern it could be there for months!!

ArnoldJRimmer · 24-10-2013 03:39AM

I knew people who shared a house with an absolutely insufferable pr!ck. He seemed to relish the fact that they hated him and point blank refused to move out. He was such a knob that even the landlord couldn't stand him, so the other 3 housemates got the landlord to agree to a fake eviction. All 4 packed up everything they had, but 3 of them were 'delayed' with the lifts they were waiting for. They said goodbye to the pr!ck, and as soon as he was out the door, they unpacked and got someone else to move in. He copped on a few weeks later when he went back for the post, but at that stage it was too late

Ihatecuddles-old · 24-10-2013 03:41AM

wotswattage wrote: »

A top decker. Crap in the cistern it could be there for months!!

First thing that came into my head, before I even opened the thread

ButtersSuki · 24-10-2013 03:54AM

Ones I've heard:

You could stick his toothbrush up your ass every day for the last month......not that I condone this of course, but I do know someone who did this to a particularly nasty person before they left a shared house. The "victim" will never know but you will.....

Or just gently brush your bum bum with it if insertion isn't your thing.

As previously posted fish/frozen prawns in curtain rails is a classic but do not do this until your very last day!

You could also remove a socket from a wall and place a poo inside the cavity and replace the socket.

Poo in butter: empty butter out of the tub. Poo in tub. Carefully replace, cover and shape butter around poo. Replace kid, place in fridge and leave quickly!

Spill milk on the carpet under his bed. As it sours it will stink.

Overheal · 24-10-2013 03:56AM

Mr. Chrome wrote: »

I know a guy who was asked to leave a house party because he was acting the knob, so he shat on a plate and put it in the microwave and set it for 15 minutes.
The smell ended the party :-D
We call him the party pooper!

even though that isnt true at all thats still a good one

Diageio_Man · 24-10-2013 04:05AM

Put a sh!t in the freezer, then grate it all over the place like carpets sofas etc with a cheese grater. Could be a messy job but he'll never get rid of it.

Sea Sharp · 24-10-2013 04:11AM

Pour some milk into the bottom of kitchen bin and on the top of the cupboards.

endacl · 24-10-2013 04:12AM

It's been a while since one of these threads.... The "Here's what you should do. I never actually would, and I know you won't either OP" type thread.

How about you leave something behind of yours that you know your housemate would appreciate, wish them all the best, and leave like a grown up. They'll never expect that of somebody who would start one of these particularly cringeworthy AH threads. It'd have their head wrecked for months.

Unless your housemate is the type to respond to one of these threads in the predictable 'leave something smelly behind' manner. If we're talking about that kind of housemate, chloroform them while they sleep, full the house with animal carcasses, and brick up every door and window. Leave scary music playing and strobe lights flashing.

AH enough...?

Mr. Chrome · 24-10-2013 04:13AM

Overheal wrote: »

even though that isnt true at all thats still a good one

It happened, I was there! The guy is a bit of a sick fcuk.
I notice alot of the posts involve fecal matter!

SV · 24-10-2013 04:29AM

endacl wrote: »

It's been a while since one of these threads.... The "Here's what you should do. I never actually would, and I know you won't either OP" type thread.

How about you leave something behind of yours that you know your housemate would appreciate, wish them all the best, and leave like a grown up. They'll never expect that of somebody who would start one of these particularly cringeworthy AH threads. It'd have their head wrecked for months.

Unless your housemate is the type to respond to one of these threads in the predictable 'leave something smelly behind' manner. If we're talking about that kind of housemate, chloroform them while they sleep, full the house with animal carcasses, and brick up every door and window. Leave scary music playing and strobe lights flashing.

AH enough...?

I work nights, this guy bangs on my door and roars shouting 'WAKE UP SV WAKE UP' when he comes in on his lunch break and I'm fast asleep, amongst many other things, as he thinks it's funny. If you I'm going to be taking the mature approach then you're sorely fcking mistaken.

Canis Lupus · 24-10-2013 04:38AM

Leave a dead body under the floorboards and then frame your exflatmates.

24-10-2013 04:42AM

Edit: just saw what he does to you.

Turd into his food in the kitchen is all I can come up with at this hour.

wonski · 24-10-2013 04:51AM

ButtersSuki wrote: »

Ones I've heard:

You could stick his toothbrush up your ass every day for the last month......not that I condone this of course, but I do know someone who did this to a particularly nasty person before they left a shared house. The "victim" will never know but you will.....

Or just gently brush your bum bum with it if insertion isn't your thing.

You can always take a picture of the same and send him an email with attachments few weeks later;)

CrazyJoe · 24-10-2013 04:55AM

Tape some eggs to the roof of some hidden area the day you leave.
The tape should give way a a few days later. Hold onto some mature eggs for a better effect

Karl Stein · 24-10-2013 05:13AM

Dress up as a sexy rabbit and seduce him..

Aotearoa · 24-10-2013 05:23AM

lift the top off the toilet and **** in on top of the cistern. that way he will be flushing **** in on top of ****. #winning

Royal Irish · 24-10-2013 05:31AM

Put a little bit of your piss into his shower gel and shampoo.

Royal Irish · 24-10-2013 05:31AM

Or your sperm if your a dirty git.

ButtersSuki · 24-10-2013 06:08AM

wonski wrote: »

You can always take a picture of the same and send him an email with attachments few weeks later;)

And end up in court.....

padd b1975 · 24-10-2013 08:08AM

Pour a bottle of Mi Wadi into the attic tank, its takes months for the discoloured water to flush itself out.

Rubberchikken · 24-10-2013 08:11AM

just leave with your head up.
be the bigger man/woman, and let him there in all his prickness:D

Teyla Emmagan · 24-10-2013 08:28AM

Most of these suggestions involve damaging someone else's property i.e. the landlord's. And it will probably be the landlord who ends up clearing it all up, or one of the other housemates stuck living there.

Just move out and forget about the prick.

Royale with Cheese · 24-10-2013 08:37AM

There's quite a lot of talk of shít in here. Who really wants to shít onto a plate and then have to spread it on the carpet etc? Sounds as bad for you as it would be for them.

I lived with three other people last year, hated two of them. Said goodbye to the one I liked and then just packed up and left happy in the knowledge I'd never have to see the other two again. If I'd seen the other two on the day I left I'd probably have managed a one word bye but that's about it. Don't be nice to somebody you hate for the sake of trying to do the mature thing. That's just false and shít advice. Pack your shít up and leave and then never talk to them again.

tritium · 24-10-2013 08:54AM

Leave a loud alarm clock radio behind set for 3am, 4am, 5am, 6am etc. Hide it in your bedroom then lock the door. Battery rather than mains operated is best...

Moving out prank/general bastardness

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