Have you got a penis beaker?

January · 09-10-2013 05:32PM #1

Thread over on mumsnet asking if you have a beaker for dunking your penis into after having sex...

So, do you have a penis beaker? Or any other type of penis dunking receptacle?

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/1875847-Do-you-dunk-your-penis

The Backwards Man · 09-10-2013 05:34PM

No, I have nothing to dunk my penis in before, during, or after sex.

.Henry Sellers. · 09-10-2013 05:38PM

Penis beaker? You mean a girls mouth.

JackieChan · 09-10-2013 05:39PM

The Backwards Man wrote: »

No, I have nothing to dunk my penis in before, during, or after sex.

I have a cup with a lit cigarette in it and a lid on top...when the main business is done I dip my lad into that as he likes a smoke afterwards aswell.

NegativeCreep · 09-10-2013 05:41PM

No. I have a shower.

dark crystal · 09-10-2013 05:43PM

I love how she says her husband is her first and only lover, so she thinks it's perfectly normal. How weird!

Love this reply further down:

I don't mean to be rude, but are you both so dirty that you require immediate cleaning?

That must be sexy. You do it then spring apart, you rush to the bathroom and he plunges his knob into a bucket.

You've just had sex so I assume you are on fairly intimate terms. Even if you have an acid fanjo and his sperm is nine tenths itching powder, surely you can use the bathroom at the same time? You can wash your fanjo in the bath and he can scrub his cock in the sink.

Renegade Mechanic · 09-10-2013 05:43PM

NegativeCreep wrote: »

No. I have a shower.

Jaysus!! What do you be ridin'? :eek:

.Henry Sellers. · 09-10-2013 05:44PM

Just browsed that site and there's threads about a drug dependent baby and someone shitting themselves, nice find OP.:)

MadsL · 09-10-2013 05:45PM

Fanjo?

GTFO!

NegativeCreep · 09-10-2013 05:45PM

Renegade Mechanic wrote: »

Jaysus!! What do you be ridin'? :eek:

I plead the fifth.

wandatowell · 09-10-2013 05:46PM

Those moist tissues, the scented kinda. I give me chap a quick wipe. Cleaning off the goodness, then I have a shower in the AM.

kiffer · 09-10-2013 05:47PM

I read that as penis breaker... *shudder*

Can't he just wipe off on the edge of the sheets?

Slattsy · 09-10-2013 05:47PM

I just let mine drop into the toilet.
Freshly flushed of course.

Mr. CooL ICE · 09-10-2013 05:47PM

It's called a 'curtain'

kiffer · 09-10-2013 05:48PM

NegativeCreep wrote: »

I plead the fifth.

Maybe you should plead the filth...

.Henry Sellers. · 09-10-2013 05:48PM

wandatowell wrote: »

Those moist tissues, the scented kinda.

A used tampon?

Miike · 09-10-2013 05:48PM

Website took forever to load, in plain text. Worth every minute for the comedy.

wandatowell · 09-10-2013 05:49PM

.Henry Sellers. wrote: »

A used tampon?

jesus lad

P_1 · 09-10-2013 05:50PM

That sounds pretty damn unhygienic to be honest

Nodin · 09-10-2013 05:52PM

January wrote: »

Thread over on mumsnet asking if you have a beaker for dunking your penis into after having sex...

So, do you have a penis beaker? Or any other type of penis dunking receptacle?

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/1875847-Do-you-dunk-your-penis

...what the jaysus is so feckin urgent that he can't wait till she gets out of the bathroom?

How the feck long is she in there?

these and other questions......

princess-lala · 09-10-2013 05:52PM

Eeeew :eek:

dark crystal · 09-10-2013 05:54PM

I'm not in posession of a penis myself, but aren't men's lads fairly, er, sensitive straight after sex?

I can't imagine dunking it in cold water straight afterwards would feel very nice.

Daveysil15 · 09-10-2013 05:57PM

I actually do, but its nothing to do with a post sex-ritual. It's just to keep my foreskin clean. Smegma can build up easily.

princess-lala · 09-10-2013 05:58PM

dark crystal wrote: »

I can't imagine dunking it in cold water straight afterwards would feel very nice.

Maybe they boil the kettle before they go up!

Then by the time they're done washing before sex that they undoubtedly have to do too, get the ride and the water has cooled down to warm enough for willy washing

Pumpkinseeds · 09-10-2013 05:59PM

Dear God, shudders* things like that make me very glad I stayed child free:eek:

kiffer · 09-10-2013 06:00PM

Daveysil15 wrote: »

I actually do, but its nothing to do with a post sex-ritual. It's just to keep my foreskin clean. Smegma can build up easily.

... you have a cup/glass of water beside your bed for dipping yourself in?
Surely it's enough to just wipe clean?
I mean are people cleaming between round one and two? Or is it just an end of festivities kind of thing?

kowloon · 09-10-2013 06:01PM

A scrub down with 000 grade wire wool and some acetone should do it.

Daveysil15 · 09-10-2013 06:01PM

kiffer wrote: »

... you have a cup/glass of water beside your bed for dipping yourself in?
Surely it's enough to just wipe clean?
I mean are people cleaming between round one and two? Or is it just an end of festivities kind of thing?

I think you picked that up wrong. It's nothing to do with sex, just general hygiene.

waterworld87 · 09-10-2013 06:02PM

Instructions Weren't Clear Enough, I Got My Dick Caught in a Ceiling Fan

09-10-2013 06:03PM

Just wipe it on the curtains like a real man.

The ladies love that.

Temptamperu · 09-10-2013 06:04PM

Daveysil15 wrote: »

I actually do, but its nothing to do with a post sex-ritual. It's just to keep my foreskin clean. Smegma can build up easily.

It does if you dont wash... what the hell dude

Have you got a penis beaker?

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