Do smelly bastards know they stink?

Milk & Honey · 01-02-2013 07:52PM

There is an easy way to stop a person smelling permanently. Cut off their nose!

newmug · 01-02-2013 08:00PM

I was on a course with the army once, this fella arrives late, and he got the last bunk in the place, the one beside ME!. I was stuck beside the cnut for 2 weeks. He was the most disgusting human being I have ever come across. The skin was flaking off his scalp, there was a line of yellow across his teeth where the plaque built up between his gum and the point where he bites into his food, and his feet were raw with atheletes foot. It looked like he had leopracy, there were huge yellow flakes of his feet-skin all over the floor. And the baxtard used to put his runners right up beside my pillow at night. I fcuked them across the room in frustration one night.

But you cant just go around accusing people of being smelly when you have 30 lads living together in 1 room. One NCO walked in, and in his own words, he "nearly went blind" with the smell. Because of this vile baxtard, we were made go on shower parade. We were all marched to the shower block, got bollock naked, and showered by numbers. That means there was a sergeant standing there (fully clothed), giving us orders on how to shower, roaring stuff at us like "odd numbers, step into the shower, even numbers soap up - marsheal" etc.

A few days later, we had a little talk with this fella. It turns out he only brought 1 pair of socks with him, and he thought it was perfectly ok to just turn them inside-out every second day. People actually gave him some of their unused socks and jocks for keeps, just to keep this fcuktard hygenic. Turned out aswell that he was 26, and had a kid! I dont know who would let him ride her, but she must have been one desperate woman! This fella must have had psychiatric issues, he was obviously living in Disneyland.

If anyone knows the course I'm talking about, PM me. I know there's a few posters who were on it lurking around here somewhere!

Larianne · 01-02-2013 08:00PM

zef wrote: »

On a serious note, I have a friend who has started to smell. It makes hello & goodbye hugs awkward. I think she has been depressed and lost interest in herself, but it's a very difficult thing to say to someone, 'Hey, you smell, why don't you have a bath and change into clean clothes."

How about approaching her and asking her is everything okay as you've noticed her personal hygiene has declined? She may be looking for help.

OP, buy a deodorant set in Boots and hand it to him saying "Got this for christmas but its not my taste, you have use it".

Aglomerado · 01-02-2013 08:08PM

Best username ever wrote: »

There was a chap I worked with that was called "Bisto pits" he used to smell like "arse barnacles" and he wore a white tshirt which had brown armpits from all the gravy seeping out of him.

He was a miser too, he told us he would never waste water of any kind, he would use the bog 5 times for a píss before flushing it, and twice after backing out a "king Edward"

Dirty filthy animal.

Filth wizard! Imagine the state of his jax, the dirty fvcker.

"Bisto pits" is a great name, I'm going to use that for all the smelly fvckers I encounter.

I don't think they know they stink. These are the people who think its perfectly acceptable to take last week's shirt and wear it to work for another 5 days, even though it's visibly encrusted with dirt. And then they put a jacket and tie over it and go around thinking they're posh!!!! I don't know whether to laugh, cry or just blast them with Dettol!

nbar12 · 01-02-2013 08:14PM

My cousin is a farmer from Longford and his best mate is sound but my God him and his family were filthy beashts. I spent some summers down with my cousin and would sometimes go for dinner in his friends which I dreaded because they only had one toilet. The problem was that this toilet had been broken for literally 15 years. It couldn't and wouldn't flus, so whenever you went for a piss, the water/piss would be at the brim and there would usually be shít floating around as well. It was absolutely disgusting.

ToddyDoody · 01-02-2013 09:18PM

No more than annoying bastards knowing their annoying I wud tink

cantdecide · 01-02-2013 11:12PM

@OP, I'd just drop it on him. I'd tell him calmly and firmly that however much he showers it's not enough and it's simply inconsiderate. Leave him to make what he wants of it. He shouldn't be allowed pollute your air-space like that...

I did have the misfortune of having to sit to the only available seat in a Gloria Jeans lately with a very stinky lady. It's been a while and I forget how revolting it is but particularly when it's a member of the fairer sex.

StormWarrior · 01-02-2013 11:36PM

How many of you are living together? if there's more than just you and him and you can't bring yourself to tell him face to face, put an anonymous note under his door. Make it a serious note so that he takes it seriously, for example:

Dear Bob,
It has come to my attention that your personal hygiene is not quite up to scratch. Unfortunately, it is bothering me a great deal and ruining my enjoyment of this home. Would you please shower, use deodorant and wash your clothes every day from now on? It would be very much appreciated, thank you.

If you're worried he might recognise your writing and know who sent him the note, cut letters out of the newspaper and use them.

BillyMitchel · 01-02-2013 11:39PM

muff03 wrote: »

There was a fella in my class in secondary school who was a farmer and smelled like cow poo all the time. Didn't matter if it was a sunday after mass, still smelled like poo. You could tell he was around before ya even saw him, cause he smelled of poo so much. His sister smelled of poo too. I don't think any of them knew they smelled like poo, but we all knew. "You smell like poo", we used to say.

Do you smell like muff?!!

fryup · 01-02-2013 11:45PM

Do smelly bastards know they stink? nope i don't think so unfortunately

i worked a few years back in an open office, and "my sweet lord" there was one chap who stank to high heaven with BO, it was onion soup everyday:(

summertime as you can well imagine was unbearable he could be standing at the far end of the office and you'd smell him, i seriously considered wearing a gas mask to work

but the sad thing is nobody had the nerve to tell him..i mean the poor chap must have been wondering why we gave him a wide berth all the time

but thankfully xmas was our saving grace and in particular kris kingle ..i was assigned to get his gift, so it was straight down to boots and i bought multipacks of lynxs galore

think the penny dropped for him after that

Pottler · 01-02-2013 11:46PM

muff03 wrote: »

There was a fella in my class in secondary school who was a farmer and smelled like cow poo all the time. Didn't matter if it was a sunday after mass, still smelled like poo. You could tell he was around before ya even saw him, cause he smelled of poo so much. His sister smelled of poo too. I don't think any of them knew they smelled like poo, but we all knew. "You smell like poo", we used to say.

I used to be a cattle farmer. I came in one night, worked all day then last thing I was after calving a cow(really hard birth) and I stunk(despite having a shower that morning). Hard to avoid when you are rolling around in cow poo.

The Brother in law was down with the sister, visiting, and when I came in, he said "jasus, Pottler, you stink of shyte, would you ever wash yourself". Being very, very tired and in no humour for townie ponces with no idea or manners, I grasped him by the collar, and threw him bodily out the front door with the polite inference that should he return, I would cheerfully decorate his lap with his dental implements.

O.P, be careful of people who smell, they might not be completely happy with the fact they smell a.t.m and may not need you to point out the obvious. it's a bit like telling your fat sister in law she needs to lose weight. Might not go down the best, and might not come across as fresh news.

the purple tin · 01-02-2013 11:47PM

Pepe Le Pew didn't realise he stank, maybe human stinkers don't realise it either.

Sam Kade · 02-02-2013 12:04AM

dorkacle wrote: »

I was working in a supermarket before and I was up working near the till at the front of the shop, and this horrible little greasy (literally dirt on his face) man came up to me saying he was worried as he could smell gas on his way past the tills.

I have no idea how he smelt gas over himself, absolutely disgusting, I was actually backing away from him and he kept walking closer to me! How do these people not know they stink!? Particularly if they are visibly filthy aswel!?

[EDIT] : There was no gas leak or even a smell of gas.

So you have a flatulence problem and he was telling you in a polite manner

You also answered the op's question

JupiterKid · 02-02-2013 12:53AM

Pottler wrote: »

I used to be a cattle farmer. I came in one night, worked all day then last thing I was after calving a cow(really hard birth) and I stunk(despite having a shower that morning). Hard to avoid when you are rolling around in cow poo.

The Brother in law was down with the sister, visiting, and when I came in, he said "jasus, Pottler, you stink of shyte, would you ever wash yourself". Being very, very tired and in no humour for townie ponces with no idea or manners, I grasped him by the collar, and threw him bodily out the front door with the polite inference that should he return, I would cheerfully decorate his lap with his dental implements.

O.P, be careful of people who smell, they might not be completely happy with the fact they smell a.t.m and may not need you to point out the obvious. it's a bit like telling your fat sister in law she needs to lose weight. Might not go down the best, and might not come across as fresh news.

If you had the energy to grab your bro in law by the scruff of his neck and f@ck him out the door then surely you had the energy to have a quick shower.

There's fewer things more revolting than a person who stinks and doesn't care about how this affects others.

Pottler · 02-02-2013 01:04AM

JupiterKid wrote: »

If you had the energy to grab your bro in law by the scruff of his neck and f@ck him out the door then surely you had the energy to have a quick shower.

There's fewer things more revolting than a person who stinks and doesn't care about how this affects others.

Yeah. I'd just walked in the door. The door to my own house. I'll smell how I like in my own home, thanks, Mr Lynx. You'd get fecked out on your ear fairly sharpish as well.

Madam_X · 02-02-2013 01:11AM

Smelling of sh1t because you work with cattle, but regularly washing yourself, is one thing. Smelling of your own personal stink due to lack of hygiene is a different story.
Both though... :eek:

I genuinely don't believe a non washing person doesn't get their stink however; how can they possibly not smell themselves? I know they can get used to it but they surely still know they stink to others. I don't think people should feel bad about saying it to them. It's not an easy thing to do, but it's not unreasonable.

Merch · 02-02-2013 01:27AM

Best username ever wrote: »

There was a chap I worked with that was called "Bisto pits" he used to smell like "arse barnacles" and he wore a white tshirt which had brown armpits from all the gravy seeping out of him.

He was a miser too, he told us he would never waste water of any kind, he would use the bog 5 times for a píss before flushing it, and twice after backing out a "king Edward"

Dirty filthy animal.

While your post is hilarious

, its a bit insensitive.
I had a friend that used to complain about a guy he used to share with, the chap was allegedly filthy, but having met him a few times, I didnt really notice it, people have a tendencey to overdo things when they are personally offended or dislike someone.
Needless to say, my friend complained about his house mate endlessly, I think he had a dislike for him and any excuse would be amplified, jeez the mate was on a drink and drug binge himself yet complained about this guys drinking and lack of regard for himself. I thought the poor guy had depression.
Work up a bit of empathy there.

iCosmopolis · 02-02-2013 02:58AM

Hints just don't work, stinky people just seem to be oblivious-they just have to be told as directly but sensitively as possible. If they don't get it after that then..well

A chap is famous in our area for it. His stench literally would bring tears to the eye. I've actually gagged and retched. As many shop assistants had done too. I could only describe it as a cross between rotting meat and pee. What's worse is he's so genuinely nice. Bump into him every few days in the various local shops, and he's really friendly and chatty, and would be lovely to chat to but you've to hold your breath.
He lives with his perfectly ok smelling and well presented relative-friends say their house is nice,clean and well kept.

Bad Santa · 02-02-2013 03:06AM

I smell of a cross between rose petals and vanilla essence, I'm that sweet.

Seriously though, odour is not always about hygiene. Seen a few documentaries about a condition where people could shower all day long and it wouldn't make a difference. One famous one was the woman who got fired and was then on Oprah and Oprah was even saying that she couldn't bare the smell but that her producers had made 100% sure that she showered at the studios but yet, it had made no difference. Here's another women with the same condition from the UK:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IPV72B4-3c

Irish Guitarist · 02-02-2013 05:26AM

When I was sixteen years old I did a FAS course. There was one troublemaker there who went around all day bullying people. One day he held another lads head down the toilet and flushed it. Later on I said to the victim "I bet you'll be washing your hair when you get home". He replied "no, I couldn't be bothered".

I've seen him a few times since then and I try my best to avoid him. There was one time when I couldn't avoid him and he started talking to me. The smell off of him made me think he never got around to washing his hair or having a shower since the toilet incident twenty years ago.

pauldla · 02-02-2013 06:13AM

I was in a museum in Paris recently...

Galwayguy35 · 02-02-2013 06:25AM

I used to work in a factory and there was a guy there who had the worst BO that I think I have ever come across.

Some of the women wanted one of us to say something to him but how do you go up to someone and tell them that it's like there is something dead in their armpits.

Some people seem to have a medical problem with their sweat glands though so maybe that was the case with him.

JupiterKid · 02-02-2013 07:03AM

Pottler wrote: »

Yeah. I'd just walked in the door. The door to my own house. I'll smell how I like in my own home, thanks, Mr Lynx. You'd get fecked out on your ear fairly sharpish as well.

And that is precisely the reason why people are hesitant to bring up the issue with flatmates/colleagues who stink. But then what do I know, being a "townie" and all that...

Ps: Did we ever find out what the OP meant by a WE guy?

xLexie · 02-02-2013 10:03AM

A couple of years ago, in my college class, there was a girl who absolutely reeked. Our uniforms were white, but hers was beginning to turn a yellow colour. She had one pair of socks, that she wore every day. The smell off her was unreal and our tutors and college director both called her aside many times to speak to her about her personal hygiene. However, the following day she would still come in wearing her yellow tunic and reeking of sweat and feet mixed with deodorant. She made a point of using deodorant in class after lunch but she was still vile. She told us one day she took "whores baths", I hadn't ever heard that expression before so asked her what a whores bath was... "It's washing the 3 f's" :eek:

Just can't imagine being told you smelled and still coming into college dirty the next day.

amdublin · 02-02-2013 10:12AM

What's a WE person

amdublin · 02-02-2013 10:14AM

xLexie wrote: »

She told us one day she took "whores baths", I hadn't ever heard that expression before so asked her what a whores bath was... "It's washing the 3 F's :eek:

Face, fingers (i.e.hands), feet?

xLexie · 02-02-2013 10:22AM

amdublin wrote: »

Face, fingers (i.e.hands), feet?

Nope! Face feet and somewhere else :eek: judging by the hum off her I doubt she washed 2 out of 3 of the f's

JupiterKid · 02-02-2013 11:22AM

I really can't fathom why people just don't bother to wash and keep themselves reasonably clean. Not everyone is a cleanliness perfectionist - and I understand that - but surely there is a basic standard that people can adhere to?

If not for their own sense of self-respect then as a courtesy to the people they work and live with.

I (thankfully briefly) shared an office with a guy who stank of BO and sh*te. His teeth were yellowed and rotten - shocking for a young guy in his 20s. I doubt he took a shower or a bath on even a fortnightly basis. He was also notorious for using the jacks and not flushing afterwards. Vile!! Thankfully, he left before too long.

the purple tin · 02-02-2013 12:21PM

Well OP learned a valuable lesson anyway. Next time your house hunting give the occupants a good hard sniff.

Lisha · 02-02-2013 12:44PM

amdublin wrote: »

What's a WE person

My money is on Work Experience person

Do smelly bastards know they stink?

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