Your favourite culchie one liners

BrianJD · 27-10-2010 08:52PM

As usefull as a sow in reverse!!

27-10-2010 08:53PM

Said by a man;

"It's all right love, *wink* I'm on the pill"

Ghandee · 27-10-2010 08:57PM

Maggie: Fergus, I think my parents are watching us, we'd better stop riding or I'm dead when l get home.

Fergus: shut up maggie would ya, sure aren't they my parents too!

t1mm · 27-10-2010 09:00PM

the tide wouldn't talk her out

she's a face like a bulldog after licking piss off a nettle

If i'd a bag of mickeys i wouldn't give her one

Gran Hermano · 27-10-2010 09:06PM

"I was happy out"

You were happy out WHERE?
Bloody turf-chewers butchering the language.

Kent Brockman · 27-10-2010 09:08PM

If ya can't lift her, then don't shift her!

efb · 27-10-2010 09:10PM

Never go into a wet field without your wellies on!

(Always wear a condom)

Dilbert75 · 27-10-2010 09:18PM

"She'd give you a stalk that'd bate a stuck ass out of a bog" = she's very attractive

DisasterIRL · 27-10-2010 09:22PM

My favourite would have to be when chatting up a girl:

"Chance?" insert gesture of culchie to prey

yeahme · 27-10-2010 09:25PM

JOHNNIES ya said, WTF,
no point at all no point im tellin ya

tis like takin a bath with yer wellies on.

tomo75 · 27-10-2010 09:25PM

Leroy Lita wrote: »

tis fierce close (when its warm outside)

or
person 1: "begodden 'tis fierce close"
person 2: "Sur, if t'was any closer t'would be on top of us!":pac:

BOHtox · 27-10-2010 09:28PM

24 years ive been on these streets, fightin, drinkin, shmokin... shmokin shmoke for shmokes sure who can shmoke anywhere now like?

johnnyfruitcake · 27-10-2010 09:36PM

"you can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear"

NabyLadistheman · 27-10-2010 09:37PM

"the pup for the boreen & the dog for the road"

In reference to the weather - "ya wouldn't put the mother-in-law out in it!"

"boilg na greine" On his back from drink

"Theres a great stretch in the evenins"!

robbie_998 · 27-10-2010 09:42PM

"you're as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle !"

Chorizo · 27-10-2010 09:56PM

Mup' ye humpy fcker

AnneElizabeth · 27-10-2010 10:17PM

Love this thread! Having a father from Mayo will finally be an advantage to me

"Looking at curtains on another man's window" - When you rent a house but don't own it.
"Athníonn ciaróg ciiaróg eile" (though he insists it's "Thaitníonn" which makes no sense whatsoever). It's supposed to mean something like people of the same type flock together. I googled and got this: http://www.daltai.com/proverbs/weeks/week44.htm

(I have loads more but they're just gross or stupid so I won't post them)
I'll try and think of more..

Spanish Eyes · 27-10-2010 10:43PM

Why are the culchies on here putting down the wimmins so much?

Culchie men must be sooooo repressed. I am amazed at how they view the ladies. Are ya all afraid of them or what? Or are ye all looking at the size of your members before you make a move. Mad.

But then again t'was the Catholic Church that did it for ye wasn't it?

Not nice. But I am not surprised. Sure it was only a few years ago ye were lined up in the Ballroom of Romance salivating at the ladies lined up on th'other side of the room. They would buy and sell ya I say.

The Scawgeen · 27-10-2010 10:52PM

Ms. Captain M wrote: »

It's to cut turf, not foot it

Cut, spread, foot, clamp, draw, and burn. I feel a C'n'I song coming on

CaptainMeerkat · 27-10-2010 11:05PM

Spanish Eyes wrote: »

Why are the culchies on here putting down the wimmins so much?

Culchie men must be sooooo repressed. I am amazed at how they view the ladies. Are ya all afraid of them or what? Or are ye all looking at the size of your members before you make a move. Mad.

But then again t'was the Catholic Church that did it for ye wasn't it?

Not nice. But I am not surprised. Sure it was only a few years ago ye were lined up in the Ballroom of Romance salivating at the ladies lined up on th'other side of the room. They would buy and sell ya I say.

awww look, someone has their 'visitor' for this month!

giles lynchwood · 27-10-2010 11:10PM

Face like a cow lickin piss off a nettle.
Face like a bulldog chewing a wasp.

Only two thing's ever came out of wexford,Strawberries and Kn*****s and your no strawberry

jimthemental · 27-10-2010 11:27PM

Culchie 1: Went to see the girlfriend but Tom was there.
Culchie 2: Who?
Culchie 1: You know Tom, the big red lad, comes over for a visit every few weeks.

giles lynchwood · 27-10-2010 11:42PM

She had a fanny like a horse's collar,you'd want to put in a leg of lamb and pull out the bone.

Fethard on sea co Wexford 1991

Ms. Captain M · 27-10-2010 11:49PM

Drive 'er like you're late for mass

Spanish Eyes · 27-10-2010 11:53PM

CaptainMeerkat wrote: »

awww look, someone has their 'visitor' for this month!

Riposte of the month there!

Look at the posts boy. They say everything about culchies ( and I have to say men in general)

Are ye all wimps or what, have to get yer rocks off by denigrating the ladies. As usual. Cos you can't do it in real life.

I suppose it saves ye having to look down at yer own inadequacies. Both in size, performance, and..... conversation. He haw.

knockinglass · 28-10-2010 12:35AM

WELL

I'M AS FULL AS A TEAT

ANY CULCHIE I KNOW SUCH AS MYSELF SAY MICKEY NOT COCK

YA CAN THROW YER HAT AT IT PASCHAL

DUNKY

INJUN

TIS FAIR WARM/FAIR CAULD

HE'D SAY MASS

HE STEAL THE CROSS OFF AN ASSES BACK

HE COULDN'T LIE STRAIGHT IN A BED

DON'T BE GETTIN THICK

HE'S SOME STUKE

HAVE A SHOT O' TAY

ironictoaster · 28-10-2010 12:40AM

The tide wouldn't take her out.

Tilt Gone · 28-10-2010 12:47AM

"as wet as an otters pocket"

mikom · 28-10-2010 12:49AM

Spanish Eyes wrote: »

Why are the culchies on here putting down the wimmins so much?

Culchie men must be sooooo repressed. I am amazed at how they view the ladies. Are ya all afraid of them or what? Or are ye all looking at the size of your members before you make a move. Mad.

But then again t'was the Catholic Church that did it for ye wasn't it?

Not nice. But I am not surprised. Sure it was only a few years ago ye were lined up in the Ballroom of Romance salivating at the ladies lined up on th'other side of the room. They would buy and sell ya I say.

♫
Blue, Spanish eyes
Tear drops are falling from your Spanish eyes
Please, please don't cry
♫

CaptainMeerkat · 28-10-2010 01:10AM

Spanish Eyes wrote: »

Riposte of the month there!

Look at the posts boy. They say everything about culchies ( and I have to say men in general)

Are ye all wimps or what, have to get yer rocks off by denigrating the ladies. As usual. Cos you can't do it in real life.

I suppose it saves ye having to look down at yer own inadequacies. Both in size, performance, and..... conversation. He haw.

Look!! Is it a bonfire??!! Nooo....Is it a burning crashed airplane??!! Nooo.... Well, what is it??!!......

Ach sure tis only them wimmin (wee men, women, ladies, girls) burning their bra's again....pffff zzzzzzz

Ah no seriously Spanish Eyes, I'd be very willing to have a nice conversation with you in English, Irish, French, Russian, Polish or Hungarian. Or cos I'm a wee culchie from the bogland, I'm already inadequate for your high feminine standards and stupid!? BORING!!

Your favourite culchie one liners

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