Sex before Marriage

Mike 1972 · 02-08-2010 07:09PM

yungwan wrote: »

I DO however think that it does actually delay people getting married.

Usually a good thing TBH

stovelid · 02-08-2010 07:17PM

Each to their own. I think it's weird to wait, but I assume that most people wait until marriage for religious reasons, and if so it's their own business if they want shit sex on their wedding night to wait.

Strange Loop · 02-08-2010 07:17PM

I don't see the point, especially with the massive odds of a marriage breaking up these days. One in two, innit?

What's the point waiting, besides all the enjoyment your'e missing out on.

OutlawPete · 02-08-2010 07:21PM

Quickie would be alright I suppose, otherwise you'd just be late for the wedding.

Mike 1972 · 02-08-2010 07:24PM

Strange Loop wrote: »

the massive odds of a marriage breaking up these days. One in two, innit?

In Ireland ????

Strange Loop · 02-08-2010 07:27PM

Mike 1972 wrote: »

In Ireland ????

27% in Ireland (but mostly amongst young people, so that rate keeps rising year on year).

50% in the rest of Europe (or thereabouts).

AckwelFoley · 02-08-2010 07:29PM

I was at a wedding last week of a woman that was a virgin at 37

She looked like it too.

I wouldnt be able to hld out for 38 years, i reckon id have been blind by 24

Mike 1972 · 02-08-2010 07:30PM

Didnt realise it was that high in Ireland -actually the Europe figures look a bit on the high side too

I know its 50% in some parts of the US but even there the figures tend to be skewed by people who get divorced multiple times (how the fup they afford it is a bit of a mystery)

snyper wrote: »

I was at a wedding last week of a woman that was a virgin at 37

I didnt realise people were so open about their level and range of sexual activity or that when they are it was in anyway worthy of belief ?

opinion guy · 02-08-2010 07:30PM

snuggles285 wrote: »

really!...ya if you come from a family that have strong beliefs of no sex before marriage that is likely to be drilled into them!

Part of becoming a mature adult is realising that sometimes the stuff your parentals tried to program with it horseshlte and then promptly rejecting it.

Not grown up enough yet to make one's own decision about pre-marital sex yet = not ready to get married

Ninja edit: note there is a difference between deciding to bleief it for yourlsef veruss believing it because it was shoved down your throat.

Millicent · 02-08-2010 07:33PM

Just to play devil's advocate, there may be benefits to waiting til the wedding night. Sex can cloud your judgement and put a boyfriend/girlfriend needlessly on a pedestal. I know in the past I've confused the sexual chemistry I've had with someone for something greater. Perhaps waiting has the benefit of letting you get to know someone without anything clouding your judgement.

Cherrycola · 02-08-2010 07:34PM

Never buy a pig in a bag.

Dudess · 02-08-2010 07:38PM

opinion guy wrote: »

Ninja edit: note there is a difference between deciding to bleief it for yourlsef veruss believing it because it was shoved down your throat.

Yes, blow jobs are often used as a substitute for sex before marriage...

Strange Loop · 02-08-2010 07:38PM

Mike 1972 wrote: »

Didnt realise it was that high in Ireland -actually the Europe figures look a bit on the high side too

I know its 50% in some parts of the US but even there the figures tend to be skewed by people who get divorced multiple times (how the fup they afford it is a bit of a mystery)

You're right. Can't find the percentage as total, just for separate countries (some european ones are 50%+) but I'd estimate (cause i couldn't be arsed calculating it), it's about 30-35% for Europe as a whole.

Still bad odds, to keep it on topic. Go for it, OP.

Mr Benevolent · 02-08-2010 07:55PM

OP, are you talking about anal sex before marriage?

Wolfe Tone · 02-08-2010 07:56PM

Personally I think if you are in a relationship then its cool.

I am a guy and casual sex would not be my thing. No I am not gay. lol

starlit · 02-08-2010 08:03PM

genericguy wrote: »

*condescending snigger*

why you sniggering? cuddling is nice!

Bonito wrote: »

Selective reading FTW.

why you crossing out my post...boyo!

Confab wrote: »

OP, are you talking about anal sex before marriage?

No I am not! :eek: I am talking about sexual intercourse before marriage not just other stuff...:rolleyes::P

up for anything wrote: »

Frigid not fridgit!

I think your cryogenic facility must have had a power cut!

fridgid /fridgit/ fridget its frigit? lol sorry...by bad...sometimes my spelling gets a head of me...have a tendancy to be a little dyslexic/dyspraxic sometimes (dysprastic/dysilecstic)!

amen · 02-08-2010 08:14PM

log thread but in conjunction with the thread on islam and marrying 9 year olds

No sex before marriage is a theory that was designed in a culture where people got married at 18

No in Ireland.

Its been only 10 years or so since marriage in Ireland was legal at 16 (need parents consent)

I think the church still allows it at 12! so not much different really.

btw I agree with the try before you drive post

Bonito · 02-08-2010 08:16PM

snuggles285 wrote: »

why you crossing out my post...boyo!

Note to self: Women will read the strike through text of a post rather than the highlighted text in bold.

Cypher_sounds · 02-08-2010 08:22PM

Unless you get married on a 2nd or 3rd date you should wait;), if not then yessum lots of sex before marriage

baalthor · 02-08-2010 08:23PM

Hogzy wrote: »

No sex before marriage is a theory that was designed in a culture where people got married at 18.

Not in todays world. Ya havnt lived till you've had an STD

Actually, post-famine Ireland was notable for its above average marriage age: people often delayed getting married until their late 20s/30s or even later.

This IT article from 1954 gives one reason why Irish people tended to marry so late.

deereidy · 02-08-2010 08:26PM

snyper wrote: »

I was at a wedding last week of a woman that was a virgin at 37

She looked like it too.

I wouldnt be able to hld out for 38 years, i reckon id have been blind by 24

You just made me spurt tea everywhere :P

thee glitz · 02-08-2010 08:28PM

The internet has spoken

starlit · 02-08-2010 08:53PM

Fizman wrote: »

There's a lad I know who is around my age (27) and he is getting married at xmas. He has never had sex with his GF, and they are going out over 3 years! I'm pretty sure he is also a virgin. Strong family beliefs and all that lark! :eek:

are you sure his name isn't ray!?

:P

MagicMarker · 02-08-2010 09:05PM

Sex before marriage?

Yes please!

bnt · 02-08-2010 09:18PM

Think of the history, before modern medicine: the physical sign of female virginity (i.e. the hymen) was the only way you could be sure that a girl had not had sex, and was therefore not pregnant and free of STDs. Boys don't have such an easily-checked way of determining virginity, and don't have the pregnancy concerns - so the virginity requirements naturally focused on girls.

Now look at her from the parents' point of view, in a tribal system: a "clean" girl was a valuable commodity, and could be traded for bargaining purposes e.g. to forge alliances between tribes. I know it sounds cold, and it was - and still is, in some parts of the world. Look at what happens in the Middle East and South Asia, with arranged marriages and a heavy emphasis on virginity. The in-laws expect to see bloody sheets, the morning after the wedding - no exaggeration. In London, a young woman can go to Harley Street, pay £4,000 for a 1/2 hour operation, and emerge "re-virginised" - story here.

Never mind that there are now other ways of avoiding pregnancy and STDs: it's "cultural", and therefore immune to progress. :rolleyes:

ejmaztec · 02-08-2010 09:19PM

Sex before marriage means that you don't end up marrying a lady-boy, although some people wouldn't be too upset.

Mike 1972 · 02-08-2010 09:24PM

amen wrote: »

Its been only 10 years or so since marriage in Ireland was legal at 16 (need parents consent)

Au Contrare

Prior to the mid 1990's Legal age for marrage was (IIRC) 14 (with parents permission) or 21 (without)

The law was changed to 16 and 18 respectively with a three months notice period (not long enough IMNSHO) and a requirement to apply to the courts if under 18.

Bizzarely the age of consent is still 17

bnt wrote: »

Think of the history, before modern medicine: the physical sign of female virginity (i.e. the hymen) was the only way you could be sure that a girl had not had sex,

Not 100% accurate either

bnt wrote: »

Look at what happens in the Middle East and South Asia, with arranged marriages and a heavy emphasis on virginity.

Also in parts of South Eastern Europe and to a lesser extent among certain migrant communities elsewhere

baalthor wrote: »

Actually, post-famine Ireland was notable for its above average marriage age: people often delayed getting married until their late 20s/30s or even later..

Is it not still the case today that Ireland has one of the highest average ages of (first) marriage in the world (not a bad thing by any means). Some reckon this is why the divorce rate is pretty low by international standards

02-08-2010 09:25PM

Millicent wrote: »

Just to play devil's advocate, there may be benefits to waiting til the wedding night. Sex can cloud your judgement and put a boyfriend/girlfriend needlessly on a pedestal. I know in the past I've confused the sexual chemistry I've had with someone for something greater. Perhaps waiting has the benefit of letting you get to know someone without anything clouding your judgement.

Yes... but hormones could get in the way too. I have no doubt there are a lot of young marriages caused by hormones in places !

Tar.Aldarion · 02-08-2010 09:26PM

Why!? I'd go crazy.

:):)

mikom · 02-08-2010 09:29PM

Dudess wrote: »

There's no benefit whatsoever to waiting until marriage. The only valid reason I can think of is religious grounds.

Didn't stop me that time I had sex in a graveyard.

Sex before Marriage

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