What's Worse? Rape or Murder?

rizzee · 08-02-2010 10:18PM

I'd say a lot more males would say murder is worse than females.

+1 on murder worse.

Bolag_the_2nd · 08-02-2010 10:20PM

rizzee wrote: »

I'd say a lot more males would say murder is worse than females.

+1 on murder worse.

i agree, i recon if you took a poll. more females would say rape was worse that murder

Jesus Wept · 08-02-2010 10:26PM

SeanKev wrote: »

This, depends.

A 16 year old myself, I'd honestly rather be raped then my life taken.

Ok..
That doesn't relate to what I said though.

OutlawPete · 08-02-2010 10:27PM

Bolag_the_2nd wrote: »

i agree, i recon if you took a poll. more females would say rape was worse that murder

You mean more women would say yes, that have been raped? Or just in general?

As otherwise I can't understand that as men can get raped too.

Bolag_the_2nd · 08-02-2010 10:29PM

OutlawPete wrote: »

You mean more women would say yes, that have been raped?

Or just in general?

As otherwise I can't understand that as men can get raped too.

and i stated that in my older post, however, in my opinion more females would rate rape worse than murder

OutlawPete · 08-02-2010 10:32PM

Bolag_the_2nd wrote: »

in my opinion more females would rate rape worse than murder

Yes, I agree .. but why?

If you are not talking about women who have been raped, then why would women rate rape worse than murder more than men would?

Tigger · 08-02-2010 10:32PM

SeanKev wrote: »

This, depends.

A 16 year old myself, I'd honestly rather be raped then my life taken.

as a 35 yeaR OLD i agree

Agonist · 08-02-2010 10:36PM

It's weird to see the number of people who think rape is worse than murder.

A percentage of the people posing here will have been raped. 0% of you have been murdered.

If I was told a friend was beaten and raped my first question would be Will he survive? and I'd be very relieved to hear he was still alive.

If I was murdered I expect it would be a very unpleasant few minutes/hours and I'd be dead forever.

If I was raped I expect it would be a very unpleasant few minutes/hours. I would have a lifetime ahead of me to recover from it and if I couldn't the worse that could happen is that I'd kill myself and end up dead forever.

In murder there's unpleasantness followed, by definition, death. In rape there's unpleasantness followed by life. Death is still an option.

To me it doesn't need an explanation like this, it's so obvious.

Being attacked and horribly scarred/blinded (plus the consequential psychological scars) and left permanently physically disabled is worse than a rape that leaves only psychological scars.

Jesus Wept · 08-02-2010 10:37PM

As a blue eyed person, I'm undecided.

Bolag_the_2nd · 08-02-2010 10:37PM

OutlawPete wrote: »

Yes, I agree .. but why?

If you are not talking about women who have been raped, then why would women rate rape worse than murder more than men would?

its a female thing maybe, romance is not on the cards when it comes to rape, again be it male or female, its a brutal offence, it makes something that should be giving and caring, into a brutal act, as i said before, how can someone freely give again and not go through the memory of the attack. this is with them forever, love is important and the loving relationship between a man and a woman is precious, its a huge part of our adult lives, then its sullied forever, comeon, how could you ever get over that?

Jesus Wept · 08-02-2010 10:40PM

Agonist wrote: »

If I was told a friend was beaten and raped my first question would be Will he survive? and I'd be very relieved to hear he was still alive.

My first thought would be of the psychological scars.

Agonist wrote: »

If I was raped I expect it would be a very unpleasant few minutes/hours. I would have a lifetime ahead of me to recover from it and if I couldn't the worse that could happen is that I'd kill myself and end up dead forever.

The worst thing might be to live through it.

Agonist wrote: »

To me it doesn't need an explanation like this, it's so obvious.

It's not.

Agonist wrote: »

Being attacked and horribly scarred/blinded (plus the consequential psychological scars) and left permanently physically disabled is worse than a rape that leaves only psychological scars.

Entirely subjective and unquantifiable.

Agonist · 08-02-2010 10:41PM

The-Rigger wrote: »

I don't see why the question is invalid...

How about:

1. Being tortured for 50 years via the worst torture methods imaginable

or

2. Being murdered - 2 quick shots to the head.

You're still alive in the former but I know which I'd prefer.

Would it be fair to say that rape is extreme torture that lasts for a number of hours followed by milder torture for the subsequent years? It's not an accurate comparison.

pookie82 · 08-02-2010 10:42PM

OutlawPete wrote: »

Yes, I agree .. but why?

If you are not talking about women who have been raped, then why would women rate rape worse than murder more than men would?

First of all a woman is in general far more likely to be raped than a man, so it's definitely more to the forefront of her mind in everyday situations, such as nights out/walking alone in the dark/going on a date with a stranger etc. I'm not saying that men are not at risk and don't get raped but it's less likely for a man to be attacked and I don't think they consider it half as much.

Women's attitude to the sexual act in general is very different to a guy's. As someone who gets penetrated on a regular basis (sorry to be graphic) you're going to identify with the horrors of it being forcefully done quicker than a guy might, I would think.

That's my opinion and my reasons but I don't pretend to speak for all women.

ChocolateSauce · 08-02-2010 10:45PM

Bolag_the_2nd wrote: »

the families can lay to rest the murder victim, they can say there goodbies and in time go back to semi normal, the rape victim has to relive there ordeal over and over, in some cases never knowing who violated them, nightmares n maybe suicide, to take the one thing that should be perfect and make it a dirty deed, how can that person freely love again, be it male or female, thats a lot to live with.

Key word there highlighted in bold.

A murdered person can never get over the things mentioned above (not to mention a number of other things too). A raped person can.

Jesus Wept · 08-02-2010 10:45PM

Agonist wrote: »

It's not an accurate comparison.

It doesn't have to be. If you read the post that I quoted when I was responding, you'll see the context of what I wrote.

OutlawPete · 08-02-2010 10:47PM

Bolag_the_2nd wrote: »

comeon, how could you ever get over that?

How can someone get over it?

A lot quicker that they would get over being murdered I would say.

I don't mean to be trite but I just don't get how people can see the crime of rape as bad as a murder.

pookie82 · 08-02-2010 10:48PM

Agonist wrote: »

Would it be fair to say that rape is extreme torture that lasts for a number of hours followed by milder torture for the subsequent years? It's not an accurate comparison.

It comes down to potential suffering/torture for a lifetime or a relatively short death. If you value life over all else, obviously you will advocate that it be preserved in any case.

Many people, myself included, would disagree. It's not fair to decide that physical scars are worse than psychological ones, or that someone who has lived through the trauma of rape should automatically be glad to be alive above all else. Some people just don't see it that way.

Bolag_the_2nd · 08-02-2010 10:56PM

OutlawPete wrote: »

How can someone get over it?

A lot quicker that they would get over murder I won't say.

I don't mean to be trite but I just don't get how people can see the crime of rape as bad as a murder.

as a victim of murder, ur buried and people live on with there lives as a rape victim, u are a walking murder victim

OutlawPete · 08-02-2010 10:58PM

pookie82 wrote: »

it's definitely more to the forefront of her mind in everyday situations, such as nights out/walking alone in the dark/going on a date with a stranger

Forefront of women's minds or not, being raped is not ending your life.

Some women and men that have been raped may say that it ended their life, the way it was, but many things change our lives like illnesses and accidents and people don't just say I would be better off dead.

pookie82 wrote: »

I'm not saying that men are not at risk and don't get raped but it's less likely for a man to be attacked and I don't think they consider it half as much.

You'll find that men in prison worry about it quite a bit

pookie82 wrote: »

As someone who gets penetrated on a regular basis (sorry to be graphic) you're going to identify with the horrors of it being forcefully done quicker than a guy might, I would think.

You could argue then that penetration is more shocking to a man and would be a far worse experience for him should another man rape him.

we'llallhavetea_old · 08-02-2010 10:58PM

this needs a poll, i think that murder will be seen as a worse crime, i would take a horrific experience over death anyday.

08-02-2010 11:01PM

OutlawPete wrote: »

How can someone get over it?

A lot quicker that they would get over murder I won't say.

I don't mean to be trite but I just don't get how people can see the crime of rape as bad as a murder.

Murder. You're dead. You are at peace. You are never going to suffer ever again. You will not have to relive your murder every day.

Rape. You are alive - but what's the point. No life. No peace. You suffer and relive your ordeal every day.

People who are raped sometimes commit suicide. I think that says alot about how much they must be suffering.

Agonist · 08-02-2010 11:01PM

pookie82 wrote: »

It comes down to potential suffering/torture for a lifetime or a relatively short death. If you value life over all else, obviously you will advocate that it be preserved in any case.

Many people, myself included, would disagree. It's not fair to decide that physical scars are worse than psychological ones, or that someone who has lived through the trauma of rape should automatically be glad to be alive above all else. Some people just don't see it that way.

I agree with everything you've said there except that my main point is that murder victims have every possible outcome and option removed. A rape victim has his/her options reduced but not removed.

I don't mean to be cruel but every rape victim who hasn't killed herself has chosen life over death.

The-Rigger wrote: »

It doesn't have to be. If you read the post that I quoted when I was responding, you'll see the context of what I wrote.

Yes, fair enough. I think this post elaborates what I was getting at.

Whyno · 08-02-2010 11:02PM

Very little difference between the two. Both are equally brutal and well murderous rape is worse again

Bolag_the_2nd · 08-02-2010 11:03PM

we'llallhavetea wrote: »

this needs a poll, i think that murder will be seen as a worse crime, i would take a horrific experience over death anyday.

a 75 year old lady was raped, her attacker was sent to prison (saturdays/ sundays papers) anyhow, what do you recon that victim is thinking, that she will get over it! i think not

christmasinjuly · 08-02-2010 11:05PM

rape is evil

OutlawPete · 08-02-2010 11:05PM

Deleted User wrote: »

People who are raped sometimes commit suicide. I think that says alot about how much they must be suffering.

Oh, I agree with that and I am not suggesting their lives are worse but they are alive.

We are talking about which crime is worse here not which crime has the most impact, although some have strayed off on that tangent.

My point is that Murder is taking someone's life intentionally, rape is not.

pookie82 · 08-02-2010 11:05PM

Forefront of women's minds or not, being raped is not ending your life.

Not your physical life, no. It's impossible to weigh up whether it's better to live a scarred life or none at all. Everyone is going to have different opinions on that. Like I said, my preference would be to have my life ended. Some people hold life above the most traumatic experiences.

Some women and men that have been raped may say that it ended their life, the way it was, but many things change our lives like illnesses and accidents and people don't just say I would be better off dead.

SOME people come out of experiences like that and are lucky to grow and get better and live good lives. Others aren't so lucky. Not everyone would agree that it's better to live with the trauma than not live at all.

You'll find that men in prison worry about it quite a bit

Hardly comparable to the everyday situations (dates, nights out etc) that would make a woman aware of her risks.

You could argue then that penetration is more shocking to a man and would be a far worse experience for him should another man rape him.

Perhaps, but chances are, unless he's gay, he would never have to experience it again. If a woman ever wants to have sex again she has to go through the exact same physical process as the rape entailed. Which IMO would be a lot more difficult to overcome.

we'llallhavetea_old · 08-02-2010 11:06PM

Bolag_the_2nd wrote: »

a 75 year old lady was raped, her attacker was sent to prison (saturdays/ sundays papers) anyhow, what do you recon that victim is thinking, that she will get over it! i think not

woah there nelly!

i don't expect anyone to get over rape, so i dunno why you're asking me this?

personally i would pick rape, i have a child to think about, i would get on with my life. i couldn't do that if i was murdered, could i?

bazmaiden · 08-02-2010 11:07PM

Rape. You are alive - but what's the point. No life. No peace. You suffer and relive your ordeal every day.

People who are raped sometimes commit suicide. I think that says alot about how much they must be suffering.

I think you have summed this up correctly sure the victim is still alive but are they really living??

I mean I suppose rape is a less worse crime for the family and friends as the victim is still alive, tough question though

08-02-2010 11:08PM

OutlawPete wrote: »

We are talking about which crime is worse here not which crime has the most impact, although some have strayed off on that tangent.
.

Well see that's where we definitely differ in opinion.

I would be of the opinion that the crime with the higher impact is the worse crime.

What's Worse? Rape or Murder?

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