Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

The 'Fortunately' 'Unfortunately' game

1…6781012

Comments

  • #272
    PFJSplitter
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,575 ✭✭✭✭PFJSplitter


    Fortunately, the worn out soccer mum suffered a massive prolapse relapse and was immediately admitted to the Psych ward for her regular ECT, while J & E were locked up with hardened milfaholics...


  • #273
    Cicero
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,144 ✭✭✭✭Cicero


    Unfortunately, the person in charge of locking up J & E was a paid insider, and while transporting them to jail, faked their escape...they are now at large and armed with..well eh...arms..


  • #274
    PFJSplitter
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,575 ✭✭✭✭PFJSplitter


    Fortunately, a BOLO had been issued for Johnnie and Eddie and the public has been warned to avoid their spiked hair - it has been declared a lethal weapon 6...


  • #275
    RunHomerRun
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 963 ✭✭✭RunHomerRun


    unfortunately, the warning was broadcast when most of the public were watching the soccer game, so J+E's hair has been on the rampage and has maimed at least 18 innocent victims.....


  • #276
    joes girls
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,448 ✭✭✭✭joes girls


    fortunately the 18 were idiots, so no-one was worried!


  • Advertisement
  • #277
    aaronjumper
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,128 ✭✭✭✭aaronjumper


    Unfortunately the parents of said 18
    were rich which resulted in a big scene


  • #278
    joes girls
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,448 ✭✭✭✭joes girls


    Fortunately they have paid me to find the hair!!!


  • #279
    staker
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,677 ✭✭✭staker


    Unfortunately, stipulations included on cashing said cheque involves "favours" for the teller


  • #280
    joes girls
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,448 ✭✭✭✭joes girls


    Fortunately the teller is mighty handsome, and blind!!!


  • #281
    RunHomerRun
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 963 ✭✭✭RunHomerRun


    unfortunately he is also deaf, so can't hear you at the cheque desk


  • Advertisement
  • #282
    staker
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,677 ✭✭✭staker


    Fortunately, another zero on the amount won't be noticed....


  • #283
    aaronjumper
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,128 ✭✭✭✭aaronjumper


    Unfortunately you forgot your
    "How to forge a cheque"
    for beginners kit.


  • #284
    joes girls
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,448 ✭✭✭✭joes girls


    Unfortunately i panicked and took a zero off!!


  • #285
    PFJSplitter
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,575 ✭✭✭✭PFJSplitter


    Fortunately, the cheque was imprinted in braille and the mighty handsome sightless teller caught the error.


  • #286
    CountingR
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 38 ✭CountingR


    Unfortunately, and rather ironically, I myself was temporarily blinded by the man's handsomeness and as a result ended up taking less money than I meant to anway.


  • #287
    Deki
    Closed Accounts Posts: 44,501 ✭✭✭✭Deki


    Fortunately, although that was not enough money, a second forged check was successfully cashed.


  • #288
    PFJSplitter
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,575 ✭✭✭✭PFJSplitter


    Unfortunately, all that cash could not be stuffed in ma's pants!


  • #289
    Deki
    Closed Accounts Posts: 44,501 ✭✭✭✭Deki


    fortunately the other part of it was stuffed into pa's britches.


  • #290
    PFJSplitter
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,575 ✭✭✭✭PFJSplitter


    Unfortunately, Pa's knickers were already overflowing with the soccer balls Ma nicked from Dunnes...:eek:


  • #291
    Deki
    Closed Accounts Posts: 44,501 ✭✭✭✭Deki


    Fortunately Ma's bra could stand a little padding and they stuffed the money there thus allowing Pa to keep his balls.


  • Advertisement
  • #292
    PFJSplitter
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,575 ✭✭✭✭PFJSplitter


    Unfortunately, Ma liked her new booby look soooooooooo much that she refused to remove her bra ever again - not even for her monthly bath....


  • #293
    Deki
    Closed Accounts Posts: 44,501 ✭✭✭✭Deki


    Fortunately Ma never had many friends in the first place so the musty moldy money wasn't noticed


  • #294
    PFJSplitter
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,575 ✭✭✭✭PFJSplitter


    Unfortunately, Pa got bored playing with his new soccer balls and began looking for other more amusing activities...


  • #295
    Deki
    Closed Accounts Posts: 44,501 ✭✭✭✭Deki


    Fortunately he joined a traveling bowling league and really loved the new people he met


  • #296
    PFJSplitter
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,575 ✭✭✭✭PFJSplitter


    Unfortunately, Ma's loot turned to multicoloured cheese - she couldn't GIVE it away...


  • #297
    CountingR
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 38 ✭CountingR


    Fortunately Ma kept a pet mouse called Derek. Eventually the cheese-money ended up saving her as much money as she had had in the first place, as she never again had to buy any cheese for the mouse.


  • #298
    joes girls
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,448 ✭✭✭✭joes girls


    unfortunately the mouse got too fat, and i have to carry him everywhere in ma pants!!!


  • #299
    CountingR
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 38 ✭CountingR


    Fortunately, the mouse eventually got fat enough to necessitate his own pair of pants. So he got ma pants and I got shiny new pants and matching loafers.


  • #300
    joes girls
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,448 ✭✭✭✭joes girls


    unfortunately this turned the mouse into a super star, he now lives in mouseywood, and never comes to dinner, so the cheese is a problem again!!!


  • Advertisement
  • #301
    CountingR
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 38 ✭CountingR


    Fortunately, the mouse changed his name from Derek to Dirk. So, at the very least, none of ma's contemporaries knew anything about her secret shame of her mouse walking out on her (and leaving her to look after the little ones).


Advertisement