The Man who ****s in His Pint Glass

karlog · 15-07-2009 02:08AM

It's gotta be heaven nightclub the sh*tty pint would compliment the sh*tty music

jill_valentine · 15-07-2009 02:09AM

A friend of mine who works in a bar once witnessed the following. It is absolutely true, I promise.

One day, two unrelated groups were drinking at neighbouring tables. As the night proceeded, one group realised that a member of the other group was continuously robbing pints of Guinness from their table. Once they were sure it could be no mistake, a member of the aggrieved party ordered a round of fresh pints, took one to the bathroom, and returned the pint to the table.

In short order, the other party, as expected, stole the apparently abandoned pint and to paraphrase my friend "- Just took the peak of the turd off before he realised."

Nobody steals pints in that pub anymore. Ever.

karlog · 15-07-2009 02:12AM

jill_valentine wrote: »

A friend of mine who works in a bar once witnessed the following. It is absolutely true, I promise.

One day, two unrelated groups were drinking at neighbouring tables. As the night proceeded, one group realised that a member of the other group was continuously robbing pints of Guinness from their table. Once they were sure it could be no mistake, a member of the aggrieved party ordered a round of fresh pints, took one to the bathroom, and returned the pint to the table.

In short order, the other party, as expected, stole the apparently abandoned pint and to paraphrase my friend "- Just took the peak of the turd off before he realised."

Nobody steals pints in that pub anymore. Ever.

That's what you call revenge best served sh*tty

FlutterinBantam · 15-07-2009 09:01AM

Sorry to disappoint all you good folks but this is urban myth.

Not possible e v e r y night and obviously, if indeed it did ever happen once or twice or even more, it's someone who works there cutting off some rope into the pint glass .It's a staff member without doubt.

My advice to anyone is not to try that stunt as you will be caught,or perhaps be disturbed and get a shard of glass in the rusty bullet hole.

Concentrate on behind the cubicle door,a dash of topdecking,or a curry blatherer across the ceramics if you feel the need to express yourself .

Much much safer:cool:

PlayGirl · 15-07-2009 10:41AM

they should call in....

The Hardly Boys !

Porkpie · 15-07-2009 10:57AM

Are they keeping a log of what's happening?

mikeystipey · 15-07-2009 01:56PM

Must have been Dave England practising his aim for Jackass 2

Bob Z · 15-07-2009 08:40PM

FlutterinBantam wrote: »

Sorry to disappoint all you good folks but this is urban myth.

Not possible e v e r y night and obviously, if indeed it did ever happen once or twice or even more, it's someone who works there cutting off some rope into the pint glass .It's a staff member without doubt.

My advice to anyone is not to try that stunt as you will be caught,or perhaps be disturbed and get a shard of glass in the rusty bullet hole.

Concentrate on behind the cubicle door,a dash of topdecking,or a curry blatherer across the ceramics if you feel the need to express yourself .

Much much safer:cool:

Its you isnt it?

FlutterinBantam · 15-07-2009 08:47PM

No Bob it is not.

Never shít into anything translucent,Opaque is good.Cloth is better.

That's the way to make a statement,into a white bath towel, good and runny,high and sour.

Wrap her up, into the hotpress, about a week later your party host will remember that SOMEONE, didn't enjoy the festivities.

Won't cost too much to fumigate the gaff, will remember to keep the beer cold next time.

bang bang, no risk.

try it out friend.

pebbles21 · 15-07-2009 08:49PM

Grimes wrote: »

Whats the niteclub. Go on tell us

Copper Face Jacks ! That place is full of jumped up little ****s every night!

Bob Z · 15-07-2009 08:51PM

FlutterinBantam wrote: »

No Bob it is not.

Never shít into anything translucent,Opaque is good.Cloth is better.

That's the way to make a statement,into a white bath towel, good and runny,high and sour.

Wrap her up, into the hotpress, about a week later your party host will remember that SOMEONE, didn't enjoy the festivities.

Won't cost too much to fumigate the gaff, will remember to keep the beer cold next time.

bang bang, no risk.

try it out friend.

.......er...i'll just take your word for it

FlutterinBantam · 15-07-2009 08:53PM

No worries Bob.

Makes an impact though.

never say never;)

The Prophecy · 15-07-2009 08:54PM

pris ske Gud!

FlutterinBantam · 15-07-2009 08:57PM

:eek:

Ace first post there Bud.

Luno · 15-07-2009 09:41PM

How did ye know it was me

Bob Z · 15-07-2009 09:46PM

M&S* wrote: »

How did ye know it was me

'cause there was toilet roll going from the glass to your arse

jiltloop · 15-07-2009 10:40PM

FlutterinBantam wrote: »

No Bob it is not.

Never shít into anything translucent,Opaque is good.Cloth is better.

That's the way to make a statement,into a white bath towel, good and runny,high and sour.

Wrap her up, into the hotpress, about a week later your party host will remember that SOMEONE, didn't enjoy the festivities.

Won't cost too much to fumigate the gaff, will remember to keep the beer cold next time.

bang bang, no risk.

try it out friend.

Remind me to never invite you to a party in my house.

stepbar · 15-07-2009 11:15PM

If the OP had said p!ss instead of ****s, this thread would have went some where else.

Luno · 17-07-2009 03:09PM

Bob Z wrote: »

'cause there was toilet roll going from the glass to your arse

why were ya looking at my arse then :eek:

WIZE · 17-07-2009 03:20PM

I wonder if you had a pint their and said '' This pint tastes like sh*t''
Would the Bar go quiet with everyone staring at you ?

shamblertine · 17-07-2009 09:38PM

Capt'n Midnight wrote: »

3 years and they still haven't checked the finger prints :rolleyes:

As a glass sh1tting enthusiast, it offends me that you think all of us are criminals therefore have our fingerprints on file :mad: Some of us (albeit very few) are good honest people who just like to let off a bit of steaming sh1t into a glass at the end of a hard days work.

FlutterinBantam · 17-07-2009 11:35PM

shamblertine wrote: »

As a glass sh1tting enthusiast, it offends me that you think all of us are criminals therefore have our fingerprints on file :mad: Some of us (albeit very few) are good honest people who just like to let off a bit of steaming sh1t into a glass at the end of a hard days work.

Fcuking top class post there Shamble.

Honest and erudite.

Can't beat cutting a length of knotty rope into a hot glass, just out of the washer.

Something noble about that.Sit her up on the shelf and admire her as the steam condenses around the rim.
Wow!

The Man who ****s in His Pint Glass

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