Why do Men hate Sex & The City?

The_Conductor · 14-05-2008 11:15AM

milod wrote: »

To be fair though, when watching Top Gear, my g/f doesn't really 'get' the importance of brake-horsepower and torque on the latest BMW M5...

My wife is Richard Hammonds biggest fan, and owns every book that Jeremy Clarkson ever published. She thinks I look like James May (shudder) and thinks that goading the Stig on makes him go faster....... Then again- when I was buying my last car and asked her opinion- she told me to make sure I didn't buy a red one........:)

Rowley Birkin QC · 14-05-2008 11:57AM

Could Men Behaving Badly be the antithesis of Sex & the City? Discuss.

Wibbs · 14-05-2008 12:12PM

Not really, the men in it are the dopey ones and the women oh so sensible, so same old same old in that regard anyway.

Star Lord · 14-05-2008 12:26PM

If anything, the show "Two and a half men" would be the opposite...

solace · 14-05-2008 12:30PM

pwd wrote: »

I'd say it objectifies men and encourages women to be slutty and materialistic; but I'd be worried I'd sound pretentious - so I'll just say that it's unfunny, irrelevant and dull.

Poetic and factual. Nice.

is_that_so · 14-05-2008 12:35PM

Minesajackdaniels wrote: »

Sex and the City utterly objectifies men.

If a similar show had a group of guys who slept around, dumped girls for being too fat or not having big enough breasts, demanded a perfection trophy-wife in exchange for cash and security, set out to define perfect relationship material, and then had the main characters slapping each other on the back for their decisions, women would hate it too.

Summed up very well. I have tried watching it and I found them hedonistic self-worshippers who made me want to go and do something else instead. But it's the old "sisters are doing it for themselves" and "gurl powah" that make it so popular as far as I can see.

DamoElDiablo wrote: »

If anything, the show "Two and a half men" would be the opposite...

Also unwatchable IMO.

John Mason · 14-05-2008 12:40PM

JackieO wrote: »

What about "Men behaving badly"?????? A big hit with the ladies aswell I'm sure.

i loved MBB, it was like watching some blokes i knew at the time. None of my friends are like SATC, they have lives and more to talk about then men and shoes

all the stars wrote: »

Im a girl and i hate sex in the city & desperate housewives!!

\ 0 / yeah

DublinWriter wrote: »

OP - the question you should be asking is why don't you find Top Gear so appealing?

i love top gear - hmmm jemery clarkson, now there is a real man for you

Sparky · 14-05-2008 12:41PM

and on that bombshell.......

tororosso · 14-05-2008 12:50PM

I sometimes switch it on but to be honest its more a sense of curiosity like those victorian freakshows that people used to go and gawk at

I don't think guys dislike the show because it is based on female protagonists; in fact I think men and women would dislike a show like that because the characters aren't particularly likeable and it is part of the bland "lifestyle propaganda" coming out of America these days...it's horribly materialistic and false and the behaviour of the protagonists (it wouldn't matter if they were male protagonists) is horrible and vacuous.

On another point I think shows like Sex and the City, Cribs, Pimp My Ride etc send out an appalling message to the younger generation (I'm only 28 LOL:D )
....I mean how is Samanthas character still alive?! She must have slept with half of New York and should be depicted as being absolutely riddled LOL At least if this were the case, and you got to see the consequences of her lifestyle choice ,in a realistic way, there would have been a decent message sent out....

Its all horribly materialistic and to see people aping the characters from this show, and Friends etc, is depressing.....

Caoimhín · 14-05-2008 12:59PM

tororosso wrote: »

On another point I think shows like Sex and the City, Cribs, Pimp My Ride etc send out an appalling message to the younger generation (I'm only 28 LOL:D )

Its all horribly materialistic and to see people aping the characters from this show, and Friends etc, is depressing.....

Yep, they want you to be a shopper rather than a person. Buy, buy, buy to keep up with your peers, you must have these clothes, car, goods to be a real person/individual/valued. Blame and hate all different countries and people who want to destroy our "way of life". In short, live in fear and work and spend then die from the stress of it all.

Reku · 14-05-2008 01:04PM

monkeyfudge wrote: »

Also the Beauty and the Beast TV series was awesome.

Holy poop! For years I've been thinking I imagined my mum watching that as a show!:eek:
Meh was good enough that even as a kid I watched it (perhaps just as an excuse not to go to bed though

), can't really remember much about it though as it was years and years ago.

JackieO wrote: »

Therefore, men not the centre of the universe in S&TC

Jaysus but someone needs to tell the 4 main characters if that's the case, they seem to have little else to fill their time with.:p

Wibbs wrote: »

Maybe some men reduce that side of themselves around women as experience may tell us it sadly isn't as fruitful as being obvious and crass in a lot of such company. Either that or as DamoElDiablo wrote you've only dealt with woolly backed cavemen types. If so that's a pity.

Research has repeatedly shown that during the more fertile part of their cycle (presumably when they would also be the most inclined to have sex since their bodies and hormones would also be geared towards procreation) females are more likely to be attracted to alpha male types (i.e. jerks and bastards), whereas the rest of the time they are more inclined towards good paternal providers and rolemodels (i.e. nice guys), so since the male perogative is to father children and not be a father to someone else's child it's understanding why guys may play down their nice guy intellectual sides around women. Also why put in an effort & time to develop the relationship so she sees more than just the cuckold if being an a55hole will get you to the same destination much faster. As a friend recently quoted to me: "guys give love so they can get sex, girls give sex so they can get love"
"nice guys finish last"

pookie82 wrote: »

Should the real question not be "why do women like it????". Unless you're an uneducated, vacuous, shoe obsessed half wit you really shouldn't find it entertaining, or have anything in common with the characters.

The aim of the show is clearly to "show the world" that women talk about sex, enjoy sex and are sexually liberated creatures who can sleep around will nilly and not give it a second thought. Which might be fair enough if their lives had any other substance. But what do these newly liberated, well educated ladies do all day??? Talk about men. And talk about men. And sometimes men. And then shoes. But mostly men.

Have seen a bit of it and from what I remember there was one episode where the core plot to it was essentially one of the characters went to a party, had to take off her shoes when entering, shoes disappeared and her lamenting the loss of her WAY OVERPRICED shoes and trying to figure out how to get the friend who threw the party to buy her a new pair. Ohhh.... I can really feel the neurons being stimulated with that wonderfully thought out and complicated plot....:rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

As for Battlestar Galactica, not a fan, too much drama too little technology and no surprising twists (hated Deep Space 9 for the same reason). CSI - some tech, good plots and some nice twists, even if they REALLY need to get more technical consultants in to point out when they do things completely wrong, not so much a fan of the spin-off CSIs though.

John Mason · 14-05-2008 01:07PM

i knew a girl years ago, who thought she was carrie bradshaw and got herself into a lot, i mean a lot of debt buying the clothes and the shoes to fit her image

I dont understand why someone as shallow and pointless as carrie bradshaw can be made in a lifestyle choice

monkeyfudge · 14-05-2008 01:11PM

farohar wrote: »

Holy poop! For years I've been thinking I imagined my mum watching that as a show!:eek:
Meh was good enough that even as a kid I watched it (perhaps just as an excuse not to go to bed though), can't really remember much about it though as it was years and years ago.

I've managed to catch an episode or two recently on one of the more obscure Sky satellite channels... Zone Romantica or something.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1XKVIXd00AQ

Reku · 14-05-2008 01:25PM

The other program my mum used to watch around then:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/China_Beach

tipex · 14-05-2008 01:35PM

farohar wrote: »

Have seen a bit of it and from what I remember there was one episode where the core plot to it was essentially one of the characters went to a party, had to take off her shoes when entering, shoes disappeared and her lamenting the loss of her WAY OVERPRICED shoes and trying to figure out how to get the friend who threw the party to buy her a new pair. Ohhh.... I can really feel the neurons being stimulated with that wonderfully thought out and complicated plot....:rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:
QUOTE]

This episode was more about the fact that getting married and having kids isn't the most important thing in the world. I'm in a relationship of over five years so I'm not some bitter single girl but just fed up of how everything is still quite geared towards finding an other half to be fulfilled. Which is why I liked that episode and yeah the show is all about relationships but it's only Charlotte who's obsessed with finding the other half to be complete per se.

I like the show because they don't bitch about each other which is refreshing real women could do a hell of alot better if they didn't constantly compete with their best friends. It's popular the way fashion magazine industry is huge you get to see a variety of outfits in 25 mins and it's good thing to sit down with your sister and laugh at. No educated woman believes there's anything real about this but some of the story lines do harbour some teeny weeny element that you can/have or will identify with. It has a feel good factor which women need in some form of media that is portrayed as "glamour" as all the others usually have feel bad factors.
The more educated women I know tolerate this and the less educated are the ones who watch all the reality crap, soaps, desperate houswives etc.

Only previous shows I've ever watched are the sopranos and six feet under which did not include any show stopping beauties (bar Nate) but were very successful so I think it definitely shouldn't be judged on that.

Kooli · 14-05-2008 02:04PM

exactly, did you deliberately miss the whole point of that episode?
The episode wasn't about shoes. It was about her choice to remain single, and why she should be judged or punished for it (i.e. the opposite of what people are saying the show is about). Her point was that because her friends chose to got married, she willingly dishes out for engagement presents, wedding presents etc., but as a single person you get nothing. And if she chooses to spend money on shoes, because she has no dependents, then who is to say that is wrong.

So they didn't just sit around and say 'let's do an episode about Carrie losing a pair of shoes...ooooh wouldn't that be great? Like, really nice shoes! Girls love shoes, right? Ooooh this'll be a good one!'

JackieO · 14-05-2008 02:09PM

As a person who has spent a lot of time and money shopping for friends engagement, wedding and baby presents I can particularly identify with this episode.

Caoimhín · 14-05-2008 02:11PM

Kooli wrote: »

exactly, did you deliberately miss the whole point of that episode?
The episode wasn't about shoes. It was about her choice to remain single, and why she should be judged or punished for it (i.e. the opposite of what people are saying the show is about). Her point was that because her friends chose to got married, she willingly dishes out for engagement presents, wedding presents etc., but as a single person you get nothing. And if she chooses to spend money on shoes, because she has no dependents, then who is to say that is wrong.

So they didn't just sit around and say 'let's do an episode about Carrie losing a pair of shoes...ooooh wouldn't that be great? Like, really nice shoes! Girls love shoes, right? Ooooh this'll be a good one!'

Girls, seriously.....

LCPL SWOFFORD · 14-05-2008 02:15PM

because sarah jessica parker is an ugly bitch thats why men hate it.........

panda100 · 14-05-2008 02:35PM

LCPL SWOFFORD wrote: »

because sarah jessica parker is an ugly bitch thats why men hate it.........

nice :rolleyes:

Fair play to SJP who hasnt succumbed to the surgeons knife like so many actresses with distinctive facial features. Its sickening in how every interview with her they mention how she was voted" worlds unsexiest women". In interviews she comes across as incredibly sexy, shes completly confident with who she is and has a great charisma about her. I saw an interview with Eva Longoria last week and nothing was more unsexy,she was a one dimensional plank who didnt crack a smile or joke once.

While sex and the City is definatly not above criticism it has done a good job in highlighting real womens issues out there such as working mothers,attitudes to sex, abortion etc etc and for this it should be applauded.

LCPL SWOFFORD · 14-05-2008 03:20PM

panda100 wrote: »

nice :rolleyes:

Fair play to SJP who hasnt succumbed to the surgeons knife like so many actresses with distinctive facial features. Its sickening in how every interview with her they mention how she was voted" worlds unsexiest women". In interviews she comes across as incredibly sexy, shes completly confident with who she is and has a great charisma about her. I saw an interview with Eva Longoria last week and nothing was more unsexy,she was a one dimensional plank who didnt crack a smile or joke once.

While sex and the City is definatly not above criticism it has done a good job in highlighting real womens issues out there such as working mothers,attitudes to sex, abortion etc etc and for this it should be applauded.

applauded???!!!! are you for real, it is one of the dumbest badly plotted tv shows ever, its like a tv version of heat magazine rubbish from cover to cover in between the ads for womens products.......

its for women who live in bogged down lives who want to escape from the reality of their mundane everyday grunt and live a fantasy through these semi ugly characters...

why dont they have gorgeous women playing the characters? if they did the people that watch it would be fixated on their jealousy of how good looking the cast are and not on how they can relate to these seemingly ordinary average looking women enjoying a dream lifestyle....

Reku · 14-05-2008 03:36PM

Kooli wrote: »

Her point was that because her friends chose to got married, she willingly dishes out for engagement presents, wedding presents etc., but as a single person you get nothing. And if she chooses to spend money on shoes, because she has no dependents, then who is to say that is wrong.

Still far from being anything deep and meaningful, just materialistic "me, me, me-ing", the same sort of behaviour which tends to draw complaints when viewed in reality TV and yet is somehow a respectable moral to an episode for SATC.

I'd have more respect for a woman who judges her life by comparing it to Mills and Boon novels than I would one who compares it to SATC, which considering the first thing they did on Channel 6 (pretty sure it was this one, feel free to correct me if I'm wrong) when the adds for the film were released was to go out and ask people which SATC character they were most like, implying that many of it's fans do such comparisons, is rather depressing.

xzanti · 14-05-2008 03:58PM

I'm not a huge fan of it, and I'm a girl, just can't warm to the characters at all.. and I've tried.. I'm more of a Sopranos girl..

citytillidie · 14-05-2008 04:11PM

I dunno i have never watched it, but from what i have heard if this was a show with 4 lead men and they talked about sports sex and woman thee way the girls in this talk about shopping sex and men it would never last, as there would have been equality groups out complaining as how it treats woman as objects.

Helix · 14-05-2008 04:16PM

im a man and i think its great

also, id love to do very very bad things to charlotte

cuckoo · 14-05-2008 04:23PM

farohar wrote: »

Still far from being anything deep and meaningful, just materialistic "me, me, me-ing", the same sort of behaviour which tends to draw complaints when viewed in reality TV and yet is somehow a respectable moral to an episode for SATC.

Done in the context of a half hour drama I think it got the point across quite well. The character was attending yet another celebration of coupledom/children, which had a gift registry attached. Yes, the 'my shoes are my children' analogy is a little materialistic, but the point i took from that episode is that the character felt annoyed that no aspect of her life was considered worthy of celebration in the same manner. And, facing into another summer of weddings and engagements, and hotel rooms booked for one, i can identify with that a little.

It's been years since I saw that episode, and the fact that i can remember the plot demonstrates that it resonated with me.

Imho, it's a half hour piece of fun tv, escapism with some pretty sets to look at. I wouldn't tune in to see it especially, but i wouldn't flick away from it either. 'Desperate Housewives' on the other hand is like a cheese grater on my nerves, the oh so zany escapades get to me.

A few people here have mentioned knowing people who modeled their lives on SaTC characters - details?!? That sounds odd.

RealEstateKing · 14-05-2008 05:29PM

it's the materialisticness of it that bothers me:

The idea that life really is largely all about shoes, shiny things and rich men: Bag yourself a top job in a big corporation, surround yourself with lots and lots of fancy branded ****, and never, ever think deeply about life or other people in any way.

I go out of my way to avoid those limited sort of people (sadly all too prevalent in Celtic Tiger Ireland) and Ill be buggered if Im spending my time off watching 'em on TV.

That said. The dialogue is pretty sharp, and I have found myself cracking a laugh or two when my flatmates watching it.

lazernuts · 14-05-2008 05:56PM

that show is so crap, i bought my GF the complete box set so i'd never have to watch it again. Best idea, ever.

...materialism, shoes, clothes, aaaghhhhhhhhh!.

I think women like it cos they all aspire to have a bunch of friends that are so nice and care about each other etc. Women aren't like that ever, so really, it's just fantasy bull****.

Wibbs · 14-05-2008 06:06PM

farohar wrote: »

Jaysus but someone needs to tell the 4 main characters if that's the case, they seem to have little else to fill their time with.:p

Yep remove all refrences to men and pretty much all you would be left with is babies, sex toys and fashion/shoes.

Research has repeatedly shown that during the more fertile part of their cycle (presumably when they would also be the most inclined to have sex since their bodies and hormones would also be geared towards procreation) females are more likely to be attracted to alpha male types (i.e. jerks and bastards), whereas the rest of the time they are more inclined towards good paternal providers and rolemodels (i.e. nice guys), so since the male perogative is to father children and not be a father to someone else's child it's understanding why guys may play down their nice guy intellectual sides around women. Also why put in an effort & time to develop the relationship so she sees more than just the cuckold if being an a55hole will get you to the same destination much faster. As a friend recently quoted to me: "guys give love so they can get sex, girls give sex so they can get love"
"nice guys finish last"

OT but pretty much. Yep. The sad thing is if you are slightly dismissive, keep some distance and are emotionally detached the chances of getting women and keeping women are increased. Clearly this is in general and it does depend on the age and maturity of the woman, but I would say that's pretty accurate. I have to say the men I've known over the years that are the most successful with women are to a man like that. That is attracting women and keeping their interest long term are all like that. The least successful men are of the "nice" guy persuasion. The latter do attract women, but nothing like to the extent of the former. I've even seen where a guy was one of the former, falls hard for a woman, ends up being like the latter and loses said woman in short order. The funny thing is if you ask women what they want their answers can be a good distance away from what they actually go for.

tipex wrote:

yeah the show is all about relationships but it's only Charlotte who's obsessed with finding the other half to be complete per se.

They're all obsessed with men and relationships. The brunette is just the most obvious and direct from what I can see. She wants a rich guy, the wedding, the kids, the gaff in the hamptons etc AFAIR they all got loved up in the last show did they not. All complete now kinda thing. That argument would hold far more water if one or two of them bought a mob of (expensive) cats and lived on their own.

I like the show because they don't bitch about each other which is refreshing real women could do a hell of alot better if they didn't constantly compete with their best friends.

I must say that's the least convincing part of the whole show for me. I have a few very close women friends and I would be the friend they have the longest by a huge margin. Their mates come and go to a much higher degree than among men. The competition between them is far higher. They're much more fluid in their social mixing. When I compare the friendship landscape of my male friends and their mates the difference is pretty obvious. Now men do bitch about each other, but not even close to the same extent as women. This is over a 20 yr time frame. I can only think of one woman of my aquaintance that has a mate from school, that she sees to any great degree, whereas all of the guys I know would have. Clearly this is a massive generalisation but in general I reckon it's pretty accurate.

RealEstateKing wrote:

That said. The dialogue is pretty sharp, and I have found myself cracking a laugh or two when my flatmates watching it.

That I agree with.

Dudess · 14-05-2008 06:15PM

I wouldn't mind if it was just treated as what it is: a piece of mindless, and to be fair, entertaining piece of escapism (and I emphasise that word - there is very little, if anything, realistic about it).

But the fact that it's received as so "pioneering" and "inspirational" for women - it has even been considered a breakthrough for feminism - is really perplexing... and not good.

Why do Men hate Sex & The City?

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