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Help me!/Ask Hot Latte guy-Supplying cream and wisdom since 2007

Red Hand · 2007-01-21 00:45:22

Please help, kind poster. No wait, don't log off!!!! Dear gentle, kind boardsie, with your pink little fingers at the keyboard, dancing like incontinent fat little pigs on key-shaped flagstones on market-day, I need your help. You must understand, I'm about to SNAP! The stress and the pressure...the vague, veiled threats…

21-01-2007 12:45AM

#1

Red Hand

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Please help, kind poster.

No wait, don't log off!!!!

Dear gentle, kind boardsie, with your pink little fingers at the keyboard, dancing like incontinent fat little pigs on key-shaped flagstones on market-day, I need your help.

You must understand, I'm about to SNAP! The stress and the pressure...the vague, veiled threats to me....I need some Heroes right right and now to save this slight, delicate damsel from the evil grasp of HER!!!

Put your underpants on over your trousers and Rescue me! Either that electrocute me with a cattle-prod.

Save me from the...Unmentionable One!

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Comments

#2 21-01-2007 12:49AM

Scraggs

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iGod

0
#3 21-01-2007 12:53AM

Rabies

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Click me to be saved.

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#4 21-01-2007 01:02AM

Matt Holck

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key-shaped flagstones makes me do a double take
markets have no stones pressed into that complex shape
trot along the box tops skew half way through each level change

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#5 21-01-2007 01:09AM

Matt Holck

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and if your gonna a snap
click a crimps cold crack
even with in timing
so skiddadles will be chiming

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#6 21-01-2007 01:20AM

randylonghorn

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OK, Jer, which of them is it this time?

The Empress of Evil? ... Blue? ... Dutch?

Or has the reported demise of Amp caused a reincarnation of Pam?

If the latter, I reckon I'm going with the cattle-prod option ... more painless for everyone in the end.

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#7 21-01-2007 01:25AM

Dutchology

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Matt Holck wrote:

and if your gonna a snap
click a crimps cold crack
even with in timing
so skiddadles will be chiming

Go away.

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#8 21-01-2007 01:40AM

Matt Holck

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not til wiggle out all the loss struts
and disassemble the rusting fire truck

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#9 21-01-2007 03:02AM

Matt Holck

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Dutchology wrote:

Go away.

granted
what do yoou want for a dollar

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#10 21-01-2007 05:46AM

Shiminay

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THIS IS NOT A MEDICAL FORUM

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#11 26-01-2007 06:00AM

[Deleted User]
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randylonghorn wrote:

OK, Jer, which of them is it this time?

The Empress of Evil? ... Blue? ... Dutch?

Must not be Blue, cause he's still breathin' (posting?). Do you have to be still breathing to post on TCN? **Looks at ceiling :rolleyes: **

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#12 26-01-2007 06:06AM

Matt Holck

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I can't stop

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#13 26-01-2007 08:36AM

Hail 2 Da Chimp

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Try harder!

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#14 26-01-2007 09:39AM

Dutchology

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Matt Holck wrote:

I can't stop

*hands you special shoes*

...Now put them on and go for a swim...

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#15 27-01-2007 07:57AM

[Deleted User]
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Need CPR Jeremiah?

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#16 28-01-2007 01:12AM

Red Hand

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If you are dispensing it, then YES MAHM!

Clutches throat and gasps.

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#17 28-01-2007 06:13AM

[Deleted User]
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Lay on this bed and we will administer treatment.*

*Yes, I know... "This is not a medical forum"

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#18 28-01-2007 03:31PM

Red Hand

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Don't pinch my nostrils so hard this time, nurse!

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#19 28-01-2007 03:46PM

challengemaster

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Blue_Lagoon wrote:

Lay on this bed and we will administer treatment.*

*Yes, I know... "This is not a medical forum"

you even qualified?

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#20 29-01-2007 12:59AM

[Deleted User]
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Practice makes perfect!

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#21 29-01-2007 01:06AM

The Bollox

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Scraggs wrote:

iGod

it's not the smartest thing in the world, ironically enough

God wrote:

Me:
hello God
God:
Hello child. What is your name?
Me:
none yo god damn business
God:
I heard there are some.
Me:
what?
God:
Are you surprised?
Me:
very
God:
Very much, eh?
Me:
oh yes
God:
Really.
Me:
what the **** did I just say, YES
God:
You said " what the **** did I just say, YES" . Please don't be so rude.
Me:
feck off
God:
What do you have that is ?
Me:
stfu
God:
My brain contains categories, but not one that matches your last input.
Me:
can I ask you a question?
God:
Ask me anything.
Me:
why are you such a wanker?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.

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#22 01-02-2007 10:40AM

[Deleted User]
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Not so sure this was helpful to OP Jeremiah...

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#23 01-02-2007 10:32PM

Red Hand

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I agree. Help dealing with human females is what I need!

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#24 02-02-2007 10:41AM

[Deleted User]
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Taibhse bean?

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#25 02-02-2007 11:19AM

Red Hand

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Bean-si.

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#26 02-02-2007 11:27AM

[Deleted User]
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Ta' me' cinnte

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#27 02-02-2007 12:52PM

Red Hand

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De Sathrain no de Luain, deanaigh me am.

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#28 02-02-2007 12:58PM

Dutchology

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Ca bhfuil me?

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#29 02-02-2007 06:04PM

Red Hand

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In die Nedjerlands!

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#30 02-02-2007 06:20PM

challengemaster

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Blue_Lagoon wrote:

Ta' me' cinnte

tsk tsk.. "Tá mé"

agus, an créatúr, faigh sláintiúil gan mhoill.

(Níl mé abalta caint as gaeilge. gabh mo leithscéal!)

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#31 03-02-2007 02:54AM

randylonghorn

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Tá an béalscrudú ag teacht ... tá an béalscrudú ag teacht ... tá an béalscrudú ag teacht ...

/mise ag damhsa

Um ... mór mo náire anois!

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