Separation

Ezeoul · 06-10-2023 07:44PM

If you move back in its almost a guarantee that her next move will be an ex-parte application for a Safety / Protection Order, even a temporary barring order, on the grounds of emotional abuse and intimidation, and that you are putting her in fear. She doesn't need to "create an incident" to do this.

She has already recorded you in the past, which makes me think she was thinking of going down that road, when you left voluntarily.

I'm not telling you to move back in, or not move back in. Only you can decide that.

But I would advise you to think very carefully, and not to let the rented room you do have go immediately.

Alonzo Mosley · 07-10-2023 11:15AM

If she does get a protection/safety order contest it when you are in front of the judge. The judge will adjourn your case and it will be up to her to produce the evidence that she fears for her safety.

Put the ball back in her court. Don't roll over so easily - stay strong.

FishOnABike · 07-10-2023 10:30PM

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121202836#Comment_121202836

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121204687#Comment_121204687

Unfortunately it is much to the disgrace of our family law courts how frequently such fraudulent claims succeed without any objective evidence.

Depriving someone if their fundamental right to their family life is a serious matter and should require serious evidence, unfortunately it often doesn't.

Tomlad79 · 11-10-2023 02:48PM

bit of a update , Im going to move back into my home it’s what my kids want not sure how my ex wife will react, she has phoned me twice in the last 2 weeks to come to the house and talk about the children and at this stage I think it’s best I’m in the home for them my solicitors b thinks it will be over 2 years before the separation goes before a Judge it’s a long time so I’m going to move back in keep to myself and and see how it goes it’s 3 months since I moved out

rtron · 11-10-2023 06:08PM

Hi Tom, totally sympathize with your situation I'm going through something similar. I've decided to stay in the family home. I've seen far too many men move out only to be paying a mortgage and rent at the same time and no money for themselves at the end of the month.

I've accepted she will move on with her life as she sees fit, it's sort of tolerable at the moment and I hope it gets easier. But right now I'm here for the kids as best I can be.

FishOnABike · 12-10-2023 01:00AM

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121223972#Comment_121223972

If it will take over two years before your separation will go before a judge I'd suggest applying for divorce as soon as the law allows i.e. July 2024, two years after she claims you started living separately.

If you can get a good solicitor to file the application for divorce for you it may give you the opportunity to put your case better and put your wife on the back foot.

I'd have your divorce application ready to file two years to the day as your wife may be thinking along the same lines.

There is no point in going through the court process twice, once is traumatising enough.

FishOnABike · 13-10-2023 05:14PM

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121230428#Comment_121230428

As the wife has already applied to court for a judicial separation it is past the point of the OP applying for a judicial separation. The OP may be able to make back some ground in court if they can remain in the family home and apply for a divorce before the judicial separation comes up in court and before the OP's wife applies for divorce.

Tomlad79 · 13-10-2023 05:38PM

I have been told by my solicitor I can love back into my home the locals have not being changed and it’s been 3 months I have spoken to both my teenagers and both are begging me to move back in, at this stage my ex wife dose not know my plans, my only concern is a Barron order, how easy is it for my ex wife to lie to get one which would result in me been removed from my home thank lads

FishOnABike · 13-10-2023 10:44PM

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/121233518#Comment_121233518

It's very easy for your wife to lie. Your solicitor might be able to advise how likely those lies are to succeed. It's as important, if not more important, to know the measure of the local judges as it is to know the law.

FishOnABike · 13-10-2023 10:57PM

I have been told that some judges have the attitude that 'the husband is going to be out of the house anyway so it may as well be now as later'.

People are more inclined to complain when they are hard done by. The fairer judges may go unnoticed but there certainly are some bad eggs out there

Your solicitor might be able to advise what way local judges lean.

It wouldn't be unheard of for your wife's solicitor to manipulate and play the system to have any application she makes end up before a judge who leans her way. There's plenty of dubious practices they can use to their advantage.

Separation

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