Husband leaving me

A lot of illinformed "advice" here, which while understandable given the secrecy of family law courts is assuredly misleading in 2023. Two principles of family law in the State: what is in the 'best interests of the child', and ensuring 'proper provision' financially for each spouse.

First, the 'best interests of the child' claim is naked hypocrisy by the Department of Jusice and Law Reform which has a two-year minimum wait until adult Irish citizens can legally be divorced. On top of this, an inordinately long, highly secretive and uncertain legal process will be added to those two years. And kids will have to endure this for much longer than necessary because of our lack of legal reform. In other words, be prepared for a lot of pain from our legal system which has nothing whatever to do with the "best interests of the child". Nevertheless, the judges are supposed to put the "best interests of the child" at the heart of all cases.

Second, the OP understandably didn't give sufficient information on the family finances or location of the family home - both of which are vital factors in any court judgement. If, however, there is enough equity in the family home and both parents are sharing parenting it is much more likely that a judge will order that the family home be sold and the proceeds divided evenly - subject to the shared parenting arrangement continuing. If one person is doing 95% of the parenting and there's no equity in the family home, that person might well get to keep it until the youngest is 23 - although if two good homes could be bought when the family home were sold, it is likely the latter would happen.

Third, to avoid this sort of 50/50 division of parental responsibility/assets, one side attempts to show they are the 'primary parent' and should therefore keep the family home at the expense of the children's father. However, as most mothers - especially in areas like Dublin where house prices are highest/need two incomes - are working outside the home, they will find it very difficult to successfully contend they are the 'primary parent' and therefore should get the family home. The OP should be aware of this. This is where things can become especially nasty, and allegations of abuse almost always enter the fray - mostly laid by the mothers against the fathers. These days, there is a nuance to the abuse allegations: because the "best interests of the child" are emphasised, lawyers will get their clients to focus not on allegations of abuse against the mother but on allegations that the father is a bad father. So, the financial self-interest of wanting the family home is always dressed up as "best interests of the child". On this point, there is an enormous degree of malice, resentment and viciousness laid against fathers in particular. So, while in law men and women have equal rights to the family home, judicial/societal prejudices against fathers as equal parents and plenty of victimhood/martyrdom/tears/drama ensure that the vast majority of fathers have to prove themselves in court in a way women never have to. This, therefore, will benefit the OP.

Fourth, the fact that renting is invariably significantly more expensive than the mortgage in the same areas would make it even less likely that a judge would allow a mother to stay in a home with hundreds of thousands of euro of equity while ordering that the father must rent. This is especially so in Dublin, where house prices are at Celtic Tiger levels. However, the hope of that happening combined with a lot of ill-informed, outdated legal advice (greatly facilitated by the secrecy of the family law court judgements) ensures that a huge number of women will go for broke and use the law to get everything, most especially the destruction of their ex by forcing him to rent - in "the best interests of the child", of course. In other words, the secrecy of court judgements ensures fear drives the entire family law system, with both sides spending the children's future wealth in legal fess for, em, "the best interests of the child". However, as much as it is a high-stakes game for the men especially - who, unlike the mothers are not threatened with poverty/renting for 20 years - it is a game nonetheless. Some 90% of all divorces are settled out of court and a mere 10% go before a judge. Don't leave the family home.

Fifth, you would be well advised to consult a specialist family lawyer, be it a solicitor or a barrister. Don't just assume because you're the mother that a court will give you greater rights to parenting your children and living in the family home than the children's father has. FLAC has a free Family Law specialist legal service, which you have to book in advance: https://www.flac.ie/help/centres/familylaw/

"the most probable outcome as regards the house would be that you will be staying there with the kids until the youngest one is 18." You don't have enough information from the OP to make that call. There are many reasons and circumstances, some of which I outlined above, why "the most probable outcome" is that a judge will order that the family home be sold.