Dental plan!

Loafing Oaf · 10-08-2021 10:13am

Can't just post a meme anymore without adding some extraneous commentary...

Riddle101 · 27-08-2021 3:18am

Get Out!

https://youtu.be/SRnjWGdqXi8

Loafing Oaf · 27-08-2021 10:38am

perish the thought...

bdmc16 · 27-08-2021 5:14pm

Don’t do what Donny don’t does

tgdaly · 27-08-2021 7:28pm

Insurance Clerk: Now before we give you health insurance, I have to ask you a few questions.

Homer: Questions! Questions! My whole scheme down the... I mean ask away.

Clerk: Oh good, now, under "heart attacks", you crossed out three and wrote zero.

Homer: Oh, I thought that said "brain hemorrhages".

Clerk: Uh huh, and do you drink?

Homer: I do enjoy a snifter of port at Christmas

Clerk: All right. Here's your policy.

Homer: Now let me tell you something, Mr. Sucker. I just--

Clerk: Oh hold on there, you still have to sign it

Homer: Oh, yeah, I-- [gags] ... must... sign... policy!

Clerk: I'm sorry, sir, we can't insure you!

Homer: I made an H!

Clerk: That doesn't count!

Homer: Looks like an X.

Clerk: We better get you to a hospital.

Homer: Can I have a free calendar?

Clerk: OK.

Riddle101 · 29-08-2021 7:50pm

Not a Pyramid Scheme

https://youtu.be/uuVh36vQkSI

AndrewJRenko · 02-09-2021 6:28pm

Homer: Spare some salt, Tubby?

Sumo Wrestler: Tubby? [Japanese subtitled:] The name "Tubby" is hurtful, as my weight problem is glandular. Are you going to eat that?

Homer: Hey, that's mine!

Peregrine · 02-09-2021 6:37pm

"Cover me, Sarge. I'm going after Bart's soul"

"If the Ayatollah can’t have it, no one can!"

Riddle101 · 02-09-2021 7:08pm

"You've got it set on whore!"

https://youtu.be/Yj7XA3tiGUg

Loafing Oaf · 03-09-2021 10:11am

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LqA2F5HoyRY

Ow, my freakin' ears

tgdaly · 09-09-2021 8:15am

Kirk: You're letting me go?

Cracker Factory Executive: Kirk, crackers are a family food. Happy families. Maybe single people eat crackers, we don't know. Frankly, we don't want to know. It's a market we can do without.

Kirk: So, that's it after 20 years? "So long, good luck?"

Cracker Factory Executive: I don't recall saying "good luck."

Riddle101 · 09-09-2021 5:16pm

You're next Chester A. Arthur

https://youtu.be/BirwmYZVGSg

Loafing Oaf · 09-09-2021 8:43pm

Bosun Willie: I warn ye, captain, push this crew too far, and there'll be mutiny.

Bligh: Mutiny? On the "Bounty"? Heh, heh, heh, heh. What have you been smoking.

Bosun Willie: Opium.

Bligh: Besides that.

AndrewJRenko · 14-09-2021 7:25pm

Comic Book Guy: Stop, those are prescription pants.

Riddle101 · 19-09-2021 2:54am

Homer: Where have you been?

Bart: Playing with Milhouse.

Homer: No, you haven't! You've been out gallivanting around with that floozy of a bigger brother of yours, haven't you? Haven't you! LOOK AT ME!

Kermit.de.frog · 21-09-2021 6:18pm

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=PrpUSKE9p_M

..

silliussoddius · 23-09-2021 3:36pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117909967#Comment_117909967

Why do you want to be a big brother?

(Don’t say revenge)

paddylonglegs · 25-09-2021 6:45am

And when is this weekend?

Peregrine · 25-09-2021 8:21pm

Hello, is this President Clinton?

Good! I figured if anyone knew where to get some Tang, it'd be you. Shut up!

silliussoddius · 27-09-2021 11:00pm

....

Riddle101 · 04-10-2021 9:59am

Union strike song

https://youtu.be/vt5X8zrHiSM

Hammer Archer · 24-11-2021 10:25am

Aw no, the corn! Paul Newman's gonna have m'legs broke.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGzkUgTgpa4

Loafing Oaf · 24-11-2021 12:01pm

Luigi: Yes, and it's-a making-a me so mad, I'm-a gonna throw the meatballs at the screen!

Riddle101 · 24-11-2021 4:55pm

Grandpa At Burlesque House

https://youtu.be/qBmAPyZsbRA

tgdaly · 30-11-2021 10:58pm

Mr Burns: Let me make one thing clear. I want your legal advice. I even pay for it. But to me, you're all vipers. You live on personal injury, on divorces. You live on pain and misery! But I'm rambling. Anybody want coffee?

Lawyer: I'll have coffee.

Mr Burns: Want it black, don't you? Black like your heart. It's so hard to listen. I hate you all so much! I'm sorry. It's my problem. I'll deal with it. Please continue.

Lawyer: If you offer Mr. Simpson a couple thousand, he'll be so dazzled... he'll sign anything you shove under his nose.

Mr Burns: Oh, a cash settlement. I could have figured that out, you buttoned-down maggot!

Lawyer: You have cream?

Mr Burns: Why yes, where are my manners?

Loafing Oaf · 01-12-2021 12:58am

And this show is supposed to be suitable for children...

Riddle101 · 09-03-2022 12:45pm

Waylon Smithers' favorite band.

https://youtu.be/j_QLzthSkfM

Loafing Oaf · 10-03-2022 2:05pm

Ned: Well sir, now we'll have an open marriage.

Edna: Um, you do know what that means?

Ned: No, but I"m sure Newt Gingrich wouldn't steer us wrong.

AndrewJRenko · 03-11-2022 8:50pm

Impervo the Painless : Oh! Oh! Man, that hurts! Oh, I can't stand it.

Riddle101 · 04-11-2022 4:07pm

Krabappel

Riddle101 · 08-11-2022 10:22am

Rev Lovejoy: Well, it looks like Science has faltered once more to overwelming religous evidence

Judge Snyder: I find defendant not guilty. As for science vs religon. I hereby issue a restraining order. Science should stay 500 yards from religon at all times

talla10 · 12-11-2022 11:34pm

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119833282#Comment_119833282

Wait a minute! Bart's teacher is Mrs Krabappel? I've been calling her Krandall! Oh i've been making an idiot out of myself!

AndrewJRenko · 27-11-2022 9:29pm

Dexter Colt: You know, Homer. Ever since I first met you, I always knew I would kill you in a hall of mirrors

Lewis_Benson · 27-11-2022 10:36pm

You don't win friends with salad...

silliussoddius · 28-11-2022 1:59am

The joke’s on Flanders, I’ll be dead by tomorrow.

Riddle101 · 28-11-2022 5:01pm

The Simpsons - 25 years in 2 minutes. Love this.

https://youtu.be/n5oHoh0JjSY

Loafing Oaf · 29-11-2022 3:54pm

Todd: My math teacher said believing in something without proof is crazy.

Ned: You think the coat of many colors was crazy? Noah's ark and the Holy Ghost, crazy? Don't tell me you're doubting Balaam's talking ass.

silliussoddius · 30-11-2022 1:28am

Terrorist to Mr. Burns: You’re a credit to the great satan.

Riddle101 · 11-12-2022 8:58pm

40 Seconds of hilarity.

https://youtu.be/JqsKqIkJ0wk

tgdaly · 11-12-2022 10:10pm

Hey, kids Meet Grampa Murphy.

But we have three grampas already

This one's a great jazz musician.

Oh, they all are

Oh, oh you see, the kids, they listen to the rap music which gives them the brain damage. With their hippin', and the hoppin', and the bippin', and the boppin', so they don't know what the jazz...is all about! You see, jazz is like the Jello pudding pop. No, actually, it's more like Kodak film. No, actually, jazz is like the New Coke: it'll be around forever, heh heh heh.