There will be a rise in incel related terror attacks

Money. Or a big dick. I know they're generalisations, but that's my understanding of it! Especially money. Yeah, queue all the wimmens on here shouting that money isn't everything, but there are 10x as many women out there who only care about the money so....

"Would ya not just kind of pack in dating etc,if its making ya miserable and depressed,and drawing happiness from other areas of your life??"

I did that, and now people give out that I don't try anymore... can't win! But I agree, most relationships (imo) have a public and private show, and they are usually quite different. You see a happy couple out with their kid having a meal, looks lovely, but when they get home it could be separate rooms and hatred. Better to be single imo. Yeah, you have to give up a lot, and you have to be ok with not being "normal", but once you accept all that (or, like me, believe everyone else to be wrong), it's grand being single. Less stress anyway. For me that is. Wouldn't suit everyone.

Because you like what you like, you simply can't deny attraction.

Yeah, some women are with men because of a certain lifestyle and if you're content with a relationship that is essentially transactional and therefore shallow more power to you.

I think its more to do with confidence and personality. I've seen fellas in low paying jobs who weren't exactly blessed in the looks department do well with women because they had the gift of the gab. I also know a few very attractive women who have boyfriends of the same height or even slightly shorter. Money helps, but then how much money do you actually need? 60k salary? 100k?

"I did that, and now people give out that I don't try anymore... can't win!"

This is where it gets a bit tricky. Do you keep pursuing something that is making you miserable in the hope that you'll eventually meet someone, or do you focus on things you enjoy and just leave it down to chance? Ideally you would want to meet someone organically doing something you enjoy without all the bullshít of dating, but that's easier said than done. There is a bit of an obsession with romantic relationships that makes single people feel pressured to get into a relationship for the sake of it, as they’re convinced their singleness makes them unworthy. 

Cos you are making the same mistake that men do in their teens and early 20's and then women do in the 30's when trying to settle down.

You are projecting what you are attracted to on to the opposite gender, applying that logic in mirror and wondering why what you are expecting to see does not materialise in the real world. But they do not work that way.

Women are not attracted to looks to the same extend that guys are (luckily for guys) and guys are not attracted to status the same way girls are.

Took me years to figure that out, could have saved me a lot of trouble and headaches had someone told me.

Now that I'm older I seen the rolls reversed, women asking "Why is he with her, I have a career and a degree and I'm well travelled, she is working in maccers?" The answer is the same, people try to be what they are attracted to rather than understanding what the opposite gender is generally attracted to.

These are generalisations, of course, but hopefully you get the point I'm trying to make.

Exactly! The "he must have a massive shlong" arguement makes no sense. Women would have to already have "chosen" him to know what's in his trousers. Also, why would a woman go out with a guy entirely for his penis? A dildo or vibrator is surely a lot less hassle if that's all they are after.

OP and those who share his mindset have let bitterness colour how they see the world. It doesn't matter what you look like, how much you earn or how big your dick is, if your a miserable whinger, no one will want you.

Yeah this is the core of it, OP just comes across as massively negative, entitled, whiney and totally lacking in confidence. The biggest 'ladies man' I've ever known was like 5'8" or something, but he was funny and quite charming so people were attracted to that.

People are typically going to end up in a relationship they have things in common with, or even if they just can have a talk with.

Nobody on this thread can change the OP's mind here on this thread, they need to go through self-reflection and figure out where the problem is, and it's most likely coming from them directly.

I was single for 8 long years 3 of which I was unemployed for. I was unconfident as a result of this which meant it became harder to approach a girl and stung all the more if I was rejected. Fear of rejection then made it harder to approach women. In other words a negative feedback loop.

Couple this with mostly solitary hobbies (video games reading etc) and chronic seemingly unending unemployment, then you become something women won't encounter or desire when they do encounter you. It's sad and it's hard to break out from but it's not a trap that's inescapable. Getting a job and socializing helps boost the confidence a lot.

I wasn't miserable exactly, just lonely I didn't hate women at all I just found them difficult to understand.

I do wish I could have those 8 years back now though I would be a dangerous youngfella now haha

I often wonder to what extent single sex schools play a role in things of this nature. I think non mixed schools create young men unfamiliar with their female peers. I think this is can and does play a role in the phonemona of angry young sexually frustrated men.

🙄 There's no helping you if you believe this absolute nonsense. In my experience men care far more about the size of their manhood than any woman ever will.

Edited because strangers on the net have no business knowing details about my sex life!

I think the Incel thing is predicated on the belief that you need a woman to be happy. These guys are holding women responsible for their happiness and when women wont bestow a relationship and sex upon them they get angry and lash out. Women dont owe men anything, and men dont owe women anything because I've seen this antagonistic attitude some women have towards men when men wont give them what they want, whether that be commitment or whatever. Each sex holding the other responsible for their happiness and fulfillment in life and this amounts to a massive sense of entitlement and entitlement is the root of all trouble. The incels need to mature and realise their happiness is their responsibility, no one elses.