At what age/point did you realise you can't house share anymore?

Softshoulder · 21-10-2020 10:32am #1

I'm almost 30 and have been sharing for a decade (if you include house sharing with friends in college) and think I might be reaching that point.

I've lived with many different people, but I'm finding they annoy me. Doesn't help I suppose they're messy and act like their mammy is around to clean up after them, sweep the floor etc.

What age did you move into your own place? Easier for couples.

xabi · 21-10-2020 10:33am

KennisWhale · 21-10-2020 10:45am

27 is when I realised I didn't want housemates anymore. That was only after 3 years of sharing as well after I moved out of home. I hated sharing my home with randomers but I can't say they were annoying people. It was my issue; I didn't like sharing a living room, kitchen and general home space with them.

As an adult, I find it is better for your independence and sense of purpose to have your own place, sharing with people is really only something younger people do as they are in their first job and still single.

Couples sharing with others is a complete disaster, it is not good for the couple to be in that situation. I appreciate the realities of the rental market the last few years would not make it easy to achieve living alone so I speak from my own perspective and what I think is best practice. Living with parents in your 20s is a whole different area but that is not healthy for parents and the adult children.

Raoul · 21-10-2020 10:46am

Fairly recently tbh. Spending all my time with the wife and kids stuck in the house during the lockdown has been tough. I need to look at getting my own place quick!

DopeTech · 21-10-2020 10:48am

28. Although I only moved out of the parents house 6 months previous. Ended up house sharing with some nutters and got the hell out of there. We have our own place now. There's nothing like coming home to your own place and not having to worry about others.

Shelga · 21-10-2020 10:52am

About 27. Rented a flat on my own for a bit then (not in Ireland!) and loved it. Now I'm back living with parents again and desperately trying to get on the property ladder in Dublin at 33.

Can genuinely say I prefer living at home with my parents to being in a houseshare though. Especially during a pandemic with frequent lockdowns.

Softshoulder · 21-10-2020 10:55am

Shelga wrote: »

About 27. Rented a flat on my own for a bit then (not in Ireland!) and loved it. Now I'm back living with parents again and desperately trying to get on the property ladder in Dublin at 33.

Can genuinely say I prefer living at home with my parents to being in a houseshare though. Especially during a pandemic with frequent lockdowns.

I'm renting but spending some time at home too and there's pluses and minuses to both.

I just have no independence at home. No privacy. Judgement for things I do etc.

weemcd · 21-10-2020 11:09am

Renting my own place in Belfast. Hope to buy in the next year or two all going well.

I think I might have seen an end to my house sharing days, fingers crossed. I'm 32 BTW, house prices in the area I'm looking at should work out less than what I'm currently paying to rent. I just need a good year next year for putting money away.

Caranica · 21-10-2020 12:01pm

Not everyone has the luxury of deciding they can't house share any more. I know a lot of people who've had to go back to it later in life after marriage break ups, others are in jobs that simply won't funds solo rental or purchase. You also have people who bought homes but for various reasons need to take in lodgers or students.

skooterblue2 · 21-10-2020 12:03pm

Raoul wrote: »

Fairly recently tbh. Spending all my time with the wife and kids stuck in the house during the lockdown has been tough. I need to look at getting my own place quick!

Have you seen Colin Furze Bunker on Youtube? Sounds like what you need!!

skooterblue2 · 21-10-2020 12:06pm

Softshoulder wrote: »

I just have no independence at home. No privacy. Judgement for things I do etc.

I know what you mean, when the parents are giving you dodgy looks at breakfast after a night on the tiles before to you and your girlfriend of 6 hours. Then you realise she is still wearing a strap-on. Cant stand Judgemental people like that.

afatbollix · 21-10-2020 12:13pm

When the stoner of the house used my toothbrush.

mojesius · 21-10-2020 12:16pm

When I was 26. I had moved from my own place to a house share. The dodgy boiler was in a press in my room and it frequently broke down. As it was in my room, my housemates decided to give me the role of unofficial house plumber and would wake me at all hours asking why the water was cold and how to fix it. I had no plumbing experience and worked in a call centre at the time.

Generally, the main thing I hated about houses shares is that you have to always be sociable, pleasant, happy, up to chatting to housemates friends/ partners when they call over. No peace or space to be yourself apart from in said bedroom with dodgy boiler.

Tar.Aldarion · 21-10-2020 1:21pm

Always wanted to, so at 26 I decided to live with girlfriends or on my own and won't go back.

ELM327 · 21-10-2020 1:28pm

AFAIR I was about 22, moved out and into my own flat.
Hate people so it's best to live alone or with the romantic interest of the day!

screamer · 21-10-2020 1:30pm

18 moved to go to college and other people and their filthy habits just drove me nuts. Bought own house at 24

Softshoulder · 21-10-2020 1:47pm

Tar.Aldarion wrote: »

Always wanted to, so at 26 I decided to live with girlfriends or on my own and won't go back.

Whose girlfriends did you live with?

skooterblue2 · 21-10-2020 1:50pm

Softshoulder wrote: »

Whose girlfriends did you live with?

It was the 60's and things were different back then with swinging and what not!!!

Marcusm · 21-10-2020 2:10pm

Softshoulder wrote: »

I'm almost 30 and have been sharing for a decade (if you include house sharing with friends in college) and think I might be reaching that point.

I've lived with many different people, but I'm finding they annoy me. Doesn't help I suppose they're messy and act like their mammy is around to clean up after them, sweep the floor etc.

What age did you move into your own place? Easier for couples.

18

PhoenixParker · 21-10-2020 2:21pm

Myself I was 26.

My observation is that most people past that point can live in a house share happily only because they have settled into a very stable house share i.e. they have found a nice dwelling, with functional appliances, a landlord willing to do maintenance, sufficient space for everyone to live comfortably, there aren't too many people, and they have each learned each others quirks enough to rub along without major issue.

There is no turnover of housemates, all housemates know each other pretty well, regular hours, no big parties etc.

It also becomes more difficult to find decent house shares past about that point because everyone of similar age is either living with a partner or in a stable house share.

21-10-2020 2:21pm

I've never house-shared. My first 'real' job was in a rural town and rent was cheap so I just got my own 2-bed apartment. After that moved in with the missus and now we've bought a house. I know I'd be a terrible roommate so didn't really want to live with any randomers. I regret it a bit because I see friends who had the time of their lives in a good house share.

nothing · 21-10-2020 2:37pm

Around 25, after 8 years of house sharing (though the first year was between digs and parents). Had lived 6 years in a 6 bed house and just couldn't take it anymore!

Session2019! · 21-10-2020 3:53pm

House sharing since 18, 30 now and only recently starting to get sick of it. Share a lovely
big house but with 4 others who are nice so it's not the worst house sharing situation, also have an unreal landlord who's an absolute dream to deal with.Looking to buy but there's little to no suitable houses in the area I want to live in my price range so will be another 2 to 3 years before I can get a bigger deposit together.

ebayissues · 21-10-2020 3:56pm

At 27 when I moved in with a disgusting house mate. I knew I was done. I was getting annoyed each day.

Now I'm less annoyed aand lore happier.

berocca2016 · 21-10-2020 4:37pm

32 (This Year) always thought I liked having company in the house, never realised my housemate was so dirty until lockdown (felt i was a maid in a serviced apartment) and also when they stopped using deodorant due to "irritation" and the smell would waft through the house. They also were physically unable (ive no idea why )to wipe their feet which meant i was constantly mopping and hoovering.

They luckily moved home home to save.... never again. Had to deep clean their room in order to turn it into an office which included shampooing the carpets.

ByTheSea2019 · 21-10-2020 4:46pm

I've always felt happier in my own place, but I've moved around a lot for short term jobs or jobs of indefinite duration so I often didn't want the commitment of a lease. You can often move out of a house share with a months notice.

Have definitely been happier when I have rented a flat to myself though.

Jimson · 21-10-2020 5:04pm

I'm 29 now and house shared on off with friends and random people till I was 27. Never again and got my own place(lucky to have a job not in Dublin or Cork)

I moved back home there 4 months with parents and siblings to try and save for a mortgage and was 100 times worse than a house share. Absolutely horrible.

Got my own place last month and love every second of it. I probably would of having a mortgage from living at home after 16 months, but now will take roughly 34 months but feck it. I couldn't stick it.

salamiii · 21-10-2020 5:06pm

when my girlfriend kicked me out for cheating on her with 2 of her best friends

James Bond Junior · 21-10-2020 5:09pm

26. Bought my own place. Didn't like living alone so I rented a room for a while until herself moved in.

SusanC10 · 21-10-2020 5:11pm

I was 28. Was in a houseshare with my then boyfriend now Husband and we had just got engaged. There were 2 other housemates.
We stayed another year in that houseshare and saved and bought our own place.
Had been in houseshares for the best part of 10 years by then including college. Some great and some not so much.

gmisk · 21-10-2020 5:12pm

I would say mid 20s I really knew.
I had shared since I went to uni at 18
Drove me to save and buy a house early 30s.

I do not miss it one bit.

waxmelts2000 · 21-10-2020 5:14pm

House shared in various houses and apartment for 11 years. Some good and some not so good!
When I hit 30 I'd had enough and bought my own house ( 19 years ago, 2 more years and it will finally be mine!|
Good luck OP

cubatahavana · 21-10-2020 5:28pm

Bob the Builder · 21-10-2020 6:11pm

28. i.e. this summer. Looking forward to moving into my new apartment at the end of the month.

Really enjoyed living with my current housemates tbh - been here for four years. But it's time for me to move onto living on my own.

Especially with me being WFH for the past six months, and thin walls in my house, I'd say my housemates who work nights and my neighbours next door will be looking forward to being able to get a sleep-in in the mornings.

Also, everyone thinks they're the dream housemate... It takes a lot of self-awareness to know when you're the problem.

Milena009 · 21-10-2020 6:21pm

I have been doing different versions of house sharing for years, with flatmates or boyfriends however now I'm at 26, ready to start saving for our own place

505_ · 21-10-2020 6:52pm

Great memories from a house share with friends throughout my twenties. The realisation came in my late twenties. Priorities change, different things get on your nerves etc.

Squeeonline · 22-10-2020 6:41am

I felt like I was done sharing in my late 20's. Been living with just the other half for a couple years now and I could never go back to that ****e. Filthy housemates with no concept of personal hygiene...

Very glad I wasn't in that situation during lockdown and work from home. Mighta killed someone.

messy tessy · 22-10-2020 7:43am

30, was living with a 'friend' who left the room in an absolute state, moved out and let me deal with it. Nice.

Since lockdown I'm back with the parents and it is the best house share I ever had!

LawBoy2018 · 22-10-2020 8:02am

My last house share was bleak af! I'm 24 and I was sharing with a random Brazilian couple on Gardiner Street, paying €900 a month!! The apartment was tiny and there were always junkies lurking in our doorway.

Having said that, I long for the day when I can share a place with my friends again. I've been living back home with my family since March and although I love them, I've never felt more isolated. I live in rural Ireland and my mum visits my 89 year old grandad multiple times a week, so I haven't left my house or seen any friends since July. Sorry for spouting TMI, I just don't have anyone else to talk to anymore.. fml

Curious1002 · 23-10-2020 10:37am

I became "independent" three years ago when I was 38. Came to Ireland in 2010 and the only way to save money was to become a housemate. I've met some great and not so great characters on the way but overall it was all ok - you learn a lot, you chat to people so dont feel lonely, you help them and you are helped, you share responsibilities, you celebrate big news and you share their grief too. Ten years on I have saved enough to be able to put 70% deposit on my own place but prefer the freelance life with no mortgage commitment so I rented a studio when our landlord decided to sell the house. I realised that most of Daft ads were saying "we are a great bunch in our 20'- something and look for similar" so i would not have a chance for a house share anymore. It was the time to rent a place just for mtself.

My advice is dont attach a specific age to when you want to feel independent. Some things come naturally, you will know and feel the right time... i would have liked to still share a house, it's just that i have no chance to find one these days.

Ironman76 · 23-10-2020 10:47am

I was 35. It just got intolerable.

I would sooner live in a little crappy shoebox of a place on my own than a bigger house sharing.

F##k no!

Rachiee · 23-10-2020 10:51am

I dont think people who have managed to get a mortgage before the tighter lending restrictions came in realise that it is now practically impossible to get a mortgage as a single person to live in Dublin.

Not only that but to rent a one bed apartment costs about double what a mortgage on it would cost. So if you are renting a one bed for 1600 a month and a mortgage would be 850 , if you approached the bank you'd be told they can't lend to you in case you wouldn't be able to afford the repayments.

With the average house cost at 267 000, and the average amount a single person can borrow is 133,000 a single applicant would need savings of at least 80,000 to buy in Dublin , how could this be saved when some people are spending as much as 60 per cent of their income on rent !

Sorry for the rant but some people saying it's immature to be in houseshares, well not everyone is lucky enough to meet someone they can buddy up with on a mortgage.

s1ippy · 23-10-2020 10:58am

Eh I got a job during third year of college so I could afford a studio apartment of my own. Those were the days, it was only €400 and it was gorgeous, top floor of a Victorian building overlooking the park. I had some very lovely but very messy and slovenly friends... They could call over and create localised mess, but I knew I wouldn't have to clean up the scale of disaster they create in their own liebensraum.

I shared again immediately when I left college, but with my friends in their 30s and my OH. Two years of that was grand, but then we wanted space of our own.

Tbh I'd have loved the company of housemates who I'm friendly with during this. The students next door to us always sound like they're having the craic!

quokula · 23-10-2020 10:59am

I house shared from age 20 to 28, I moved around a lot so had a lot of different housemates. Never had any problems, flatmates always either fell into the category where we got on well or we just didn't see much of each other because our schedules were different. I met people through house sharing from various walks of life who I never would have met through my usual social groups which was actually quite nice.

I stopped because it was time for my partner and I to get our own place but if I was single I'd have been happy enough to keep doing it for a few more years at least.

23-10-2020 11:00am

Bought first place at 24.

23-10-2020 11:08am

Bob the Builder wrote: »

............ and thin walls in my house, I'd say my housemates who work nights and my neighbours next door will be looking forward to being able to get a sleep-in in the mornings.

Also, everyone thinks they're the dream housemate... It takes a lot of self-awareness to know when you're the problem.

Were you WFH as a builder or what :pac:

Jafin · 23-10-2020 11:26am

If we're talking about house sharing with strangers/friends rather than family then...when I was in college, which I finished when I was 24. The final year was honestly just horrible. I was living with five other people and some of them had no regard for anyone else's belongings and would regularly take food from the fridge and freezer that wasn't their own. I'm not just talking a slice of bread here and there. There was one week I did my weekly food shop and when I got up the next day there was at least 70% if my food just gone. I never found out who it was, nobody would admit to it.

I did a house share once more after that when I worked abroad in Asia for 6 months and that experience was fine, but once I moved back home living with my mother in 2016 and started working full time I decided never again and started saving to buy a property myself (renting on your own can be quite expensive and I view rent as dead money, personally). Currently sale agreed on an apartment so hopefully in a few months I'll finally have my own place.

victor8600 · 23-10-2020 11:26am

28. I actually liked living in shared houses, it was a great way to meet new people. Especially if you have enough money to choose a larger house with fewer occupants. After a while though, my wife wanted a bit more privacy and opportunities to decorate her own place, so that put a stop to the house sharing.

ec18 · 23-10-2020 11:53am

not so much an age but when realised myself and partner were most likely going to be together for the long haul, needed to stop house sharing....I was fine with it while single and in early days of our relationship

JimmyVik · 23-10-2020 11:59am

frozenfrozen · 23-10-2020 12:12pm

There's a limit to how many times you can clean up after others while feeling like you're bothering them by being at home where you live as well.

The whole setup of the last one was so annoying id never do it again

At what age/point did you realise you can't house share anymore?

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