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Biggest scandal in your workplace (Mod Note in OP)

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    #392
    Gannicus
    Registered Users Posts: 1,736 ✭✭✭Gannicus


    begsbyOnaTrain wrote: »
    Place before that was a large MNC in Ireland. One day security turned up to the desk of a guy (a real dick) and turfed him out. He had been with the company for ten years. Apparently some mix-up had left him reporting to no-one and doing nothing for years. He'd been abusing this situation and getting a lot of "freebies" too. I love the bureaucracy of big companies.

    So the company fired him due to the fact they fecked up and weren't managing their staff.... dafuq?


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    #393
    RosieJoe
    Registered Users Posts: 3,482 ✭✭✭RosieJoe


    begsbyOnaTrain wrote: »
    My last workplace got hit hard by a phantom shttr(s?). Over the period of two months there were multiple instances. Both the mens and womens were hit. On the floor, the sink, all your standard targets. Multiple, hilarious emails sent by management encouraging people to "act like civilised adults" etc.

    Place before that was a large MNC in Ireland. One day security turned up to the desk of a guy (a real dick) and turfed him out. He had been with the company for ten years. Apparently some mix-up had left him reporting to no-one and doing nothing for years. He'd been abusing this situation and getting a lot of "freebies" too. I love the bureaucracy of big companies.

    Standard targets to most mean the toilet itself! WTF motivates people to shít in a sink? Or smear their own crap around the place with their hands!


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    #394
    begsbyOnaTrain
    Closed Accounts Posts: 272 ✭✭begsbyOnaTrain


    Gannicus wrote: »
    So the company fired him due to the fact they fecked up and weren't managing their staff.... dafuq?

    Obviously we didn't get the full story but from what I heard he'd been actively misleading local management, had been bagging "freebies" (aka stealing electrical supplies and the likes from the site for a home office, which was apparently kickass) and there was a lot of fraudulent expenses that had been approved due to being between the cracks of business units.

    I wouldn't have stole but if I were in his position, I wouldn't have told anyone either.


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    #395
    begsbyOnaTrain
    Closed Accounts Posts: 272 ✭✭begsbyOnaTrain


    RosieJoe wrote: »
    WTF motivates people to shít in a sink?

    They were never caught, so are still out there... maybe sitting beside you right now?


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    #396
    sportsfan90
    Registered Users Posts: 603 ✭✭✭sportsfan90


    Our phantom sh1tter was in the elevator.


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    #397
    Salary Negotiator
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,148 ✭✭✭Salary Negotiator


    Started a job in a bank a few years ago with about 10 other people, new bank and the recruitment process was a little rushed. I was interviewed on a Wednesday and started the following Monday and asked to bring in ID docs etc.

    1 girl didn't return from the first break and nothing was said about it. I later found out that when her bank account was being opened (needed a company account to get paid), she failed the AML check and was immediately fired/asked to leave.

    Same place a cashier stole £10K and it only came to light when he went on annual leave, turns out each night he'd just been moving balances between accounts and balancing the books that way.


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    #398
    rgmmg
    Registered Users Posts: 537 ✭✭✭rgmmg


    tylercheribini wrote: »
    **** loudly he/she must want to be caught, I don't even let a whimper when I cum at home.

    A single tear drop from cheek, and helmet


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    #399
    Fattybojangles
    Registered Users Posts: 1,128 ✭✭✭Fattybojangles


    partyguinness wrote: »
    The owner of our local busy pub/restaurant/guesthouse actively only recruits young (very) good looking teenage girls for public facing roles. To be fair he has also stuck his own daughter out there- she is hot though.

    All the fatties and munters are confined to the kitchen. Sad but true.

    Regrettably two of my sisters have had summer jobs there behind the bar/waitressing over the years.

    Do your sisters get really drunk and take it up the **** pipe like you do?

    Mod note: Banned


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    #400
    earlytobed
    Registered Users Posts: 452 ✭✭earlytobed


    On the phantom crappers, I caught one when i was serving overseas with the army. Our platoon sergeant was giving out yards about the state of the jacks as there was regularly crap all over the seat, bowl etc.
    I was entering trap 1 one day and met a local chap that used cook and clean the kitchen for us coming out.
    Turns out it was a cultural thing, he used squat over the bowel and let fly (the local toilets were hole in the floor jobs)
    I pointed out the error of his ways and that was an and to the matter.


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    #401
    oleard1987
    Registered Users Posts: 172 ✭✭oleard1987


    Fattybojangles wrote: »
    Do your sisters get really drunk and take it up the **** pipe like you do?

    seems the pub owner has joined boards as well :):pac::pac::pac:


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    #402
    AlphabetCards
    Registered Users Posts: 410 ✭✭AlphabetCards


    ^^ I have found the same problem in three universities here in the UK. They have to put up illustrations showing the correct ****ting position.


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    #403
    AlphabetCards
    Registered Users Posts: 410 ✭✭AlphabetCards


    Fattybojangles wrote: »
    Do your sisters get really drunk and take it up the **** pipe like you do?

    Strong opening statement.


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    #404
    partyguinness
    Registered Users Posts: 8,207 ✭✭✭partyguinness


    Fattybojangles wrote: »
    Do your sisters get really drunk and take it up the **** pipe like you do?


    Nothing you will ever have to concern yourself with that tragic micropenis affliction of yours.


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    #405
    Fattybojangles
    Registered Users Posts: 1,128 ✭✭✭Fattybojangles


    partyguinness wrote: »
    Nothing you will ever have to concern yourself with that tragic micropenis affliction of yours.

    Its fatty by name fatty by nature here pal


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    #406
    EmmetSpiceland
    Registered Users Posts: 10,535 ✭✭✭✭EmmetSpiceland


    sportsfan90 wrote: »
    Our phantom sh1tter was in the elevator.

    Wrong on so many “levels”.

    The tide is turning…



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    #407
    Dr. Bre
    Registered Users Posts: 7,541 ✭✭✭Dr. Bre


    sportsfan90 wrote: »
    Our phantom sh1tter was in the elevator.

    Prob gets out at Turd floor


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    #408
    tylercheribini
    Registered Users Posts: 2,014 ✭✭✭tylercheribini


    You should never evacuate yourself in an elevator when theres a fire.


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    #409
    Seth Brundle
    Moderators, Politics Moderators Posts: 38,916 Mod ✭✭✭✭Seth Brundle


    partyguinness wrote: »
    My youngest sister is the head off Penny in The Big Bang Theory in all aspects.
    I wouldn't mind head off Penny from the Big Bang Theory the!


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    #410
    MetzgerMeister
    Registered Users Posts: 19,854 ✭✭✭✭MetzgerMeister


    We had a phantom ****ter not so long ago. Deposits left at the door into the canteen, various spots around the warehouse, outside the door into the jacks. He would always strike at night (obviously on night shift) and these deposits would be there in the morning.

    We eventually caught him and gave him a kick up the hole.

    Bloody cats!!


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    #411
    Ted_YNWA
    Registered Users Posts: 71,799 ✭✭✭✭Ted_YNWA


    MetzgerMeister wrote: »
    We had a phantom ****ter not so long ago. Deposits left at the door into the canteen, various spots around the warehouse, outside the door into the jacks. He would always strike at night (obviously on night shift) and these deposits would be there in the morning.

    We eventually caught him and gave him a kick up the hole.

    Bloody cats!!

    Can never trust them Kilkenny folk.

    :pac:


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    #412
    Canyon86
    Registered Users Posts: 1,223 ✭✭✭Canyon86


    A company i worked for hired an indian chap, due to lax background visa checks this guy worked for a 1year plus all the while having no valid visa,
    He had intially arrived on a student visa but it lapsed when he dropped out of college

    It all came to a head one day when the Gardai turned up looking for him, turns out he was stopped driving illegally and gave the companys name,


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    #413
    debok
    Closed Accounts Posts: 814 ✭✭✭debok


    Fattybojangles wrote: »
    Do your sisters get really drunk and take it up the **** pipe like you do?

    Bravo some shout.


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    #414
    Hotblack Desiato
    Registered Users Posts: 33,965 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato


    partyguinness wrote: »
    All the fatties and munters are confined to the kitchen. Sad but true.

    that must eat into the profits...

    Life ain't always empty.



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    #415
    punisher5112
    Registered Users Posts: 24,647 ✭✭✭✭punisher5112


    Guy got off dart went to where toilet door is for staff and took a dump...

    Funny thing that same day another thicko took a dump on a seat on the 46a at around the same time and also at dun laoghaire.

    Madness....


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    #416
    Redneck Reject
    Closed Accounts Posts: 587 ✭✭✭Redneck Reject


    Seems the Boss's wife has a boy toy. Boss came home early so her ladyship instructed us to pretend he was a future prospect in stable management.Boss and wife go inside,Boytoy goes his own way. Pretty sure that wasn't in my job description.


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    #417
    jackboy
    Registered Users Posts: 4,462 ✭✭✭jackboy


    There was recently a notorious phantom shi**er in a Midwest MNC. He was leaving his load in corridors outside clean rooms. Management were able to whittle the suspects down to a few. They then just used some nonsense, including threatening DNA profiling, to flush him out. He admitted it and was fired. He was a seemingly normal guy, married with 3 children.


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    #418
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    jackboy wrote: »
    There was recently a notorious phantom shi**er in a Midwest MNC. He was leaving his load in corridors outside clean rooms. Management were able to whittle the suspects down to a few. They then just used some nonsense, including threatening DNA profiling, to flush him out. He admitted it and was fired. He was a seemingly normal guy, married with 3 children.

    Imagine having to try to explain that to the wife.


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    #419
    bear1
    Registered Users Posts: 12,811 ✭✭✭✭bear1


    Ward J. Littell wrote: »
    Imagine having to try to explain that to the wife.

    **** hit the fan at work and they are sending our jobs down the toilet.


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    #420
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    "honey ive been ****canned"


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    #421
    punisher5112
    Registered Users Posts: 24,647 ✭✭✭✭punisher5112


    Remember a guy years ago was riding school girls and got a couple pregnant, the dad and a few others arrived to where he may have been working that day....

    He didn't last much longer and disappeared after that.


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