Anyone else not want children?

kunst nugget · 05-04-2019 10:30AM

TheBoyConor wrote: »

Are you for real?

Jesus man, I really hope you are never in the position where a family member is getting news that they have motor neuron disease or incurable cancer. Sure I'm sure you will reassure them by saying, "well sis/bro, could be worse, at least you're not having a baby! Lucky break for you , wha?"

You'd wanna adjust your attitude.

Some people are going to use hyperbole when talking about issues like this. It's really up to you whether you choose to take offence or not. You could just ignore it...

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5 · 05-04-2019 10:35AM

SusieBlue wrote: »

I really really want them. I'd have one now if I could, the lack of man in my life makes it a bit more difficult though.
Its a deal breaker for me and not something I'd be willing to compromise on.

Yeah that's the thing with them innit, you can't really compromise and half have a kid.

I've never wanted them and always been upfront about that with partners. My OH is more ambivalent about it, leaning more strongly towards no whenever he has to be around small kids :pac:

Like another poster said I'd be open to step parenthood, but intending to be in this for the long haul so moot point. Far as I know.

If it came down to it I don't know if I'd cave to keep the relationship, I'd hope not but who knows. Be a nice solid foundation for the kid anyway, that seems like the basis for juuust enough emotional trauma that they'd turn out funny.

Credit Checker Moose · 05-04-2019 10:36AM

Neither me or Mrs Moose can have kids. We are now at an age now where we could be not bothered jumping through all the hoops of Tulsa. The little hitlers will probably say we are now too old in any event.

Being told you do not meet their criteria for fertility treatment does not inspire confidence in any Irish doctors. Yet they allow the underclasses to breed unrestricted. Fcuk 'em all.

Ah well, everything to the cats home in the will.

kunst nugget · 05-04-2019 10:41AM

Credit Checker Moose wrote: »

Being told you do not meet their criteria for fertility treatment does not inspire confidence in any Irish doctors. Yet they allow the underclasses to breed unrestricted. Fcuk 'em all.

God, with that winning personality, I thought you would have been a shoe-in.

Trump Is Right · 05-04-2019 10:52AM

Easton Ambitious Suicide wrote: »

Be a nice solid foundation for the kid anyway, that seems like the basis for juuust enough emotional trauma that they'd turn out funny.

Yeah don't become a parent... good call.

fleet_admiral · 05-04-2019 10:55AM

Didn't want any kids or anything to do with them til my mid 20's. Now I couldn't bear life without my son and would love more

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5 · 05-04-2019 11:02AM

Trump Is Right wrote: »

Yeah don't become a parent... good call.

I feel like I could really turn out a couple of good comedians or literary novelists. I mean yes, at some point they probably would say to a therapist "it would have been easier to deal with if she had just hit me" but I'd definitely get a carefully worded thank you in some kind of awards acceptance speech.

Deebles McBeebles · 05-04-2019 11:03AM

Credit Checker Moose wrote: »

Being told you do not meet their criteria for fertility treatment does not inspire confidence in any Irish doctors. Yet they allow the underclasses to breed unrestricted. Fcuk 'em all.

I don't think a doctor is present for every caravan conception.

pgj2015 · 05-04-2019 01:07PM

seamus wrote: »

I mean this in all seriousness and with no malice intended, that you should probably go see a therapist for your confidence issues.

There's nothing wrong with not wanting kids, but being so terrified that you're too inept to have kids that you would rather die instead, sounds like a deeper problem to me.

i have no problems regarding confidence pal, if i did have children i would be well able to look after them, i run my own business and make a very good living, i have been in a long term relationship in the past where the woman had a child, i got on great with the child but i suppose the child wasn't mine, i have a nephew who im very fond of etc but I just dont want my own kids, there is nothing wrong with that.

seamus · 05-04-2019 01:11PM

pgj2015 wrote: »

i have no problems regarding confidence pal, if i did have children i would be well able to look after them, i run my own business and make a very good living, i have been in a long term relationship in the past where the woman had a child, i got on great with the child but i suppose the child wasn't mine, i have a nephew who im very fond of etc but I just dont want my own kids, there is nothing wrong with that.

That's not what you said earlier.

:rolleyes:

pgj2015 · 05-04-2019 01:16PM

seamus wrote: »

That's not what you said earlier.

:rolleyes:

Go back and read it again. where did I say I had some sort of confidence issues regarding having kids?

I don't want the responsibility of having kids, not because I lack confidence in raising kids. I enjoy my life as it is, I don't want children to change it.

Western Lowland Gorilla · 05-04-2019 01:20PM

Even if I wanted one, I can't afford a cat, let alone a flippin child.

Deebles McBeebles · 05-04-2019 01:30PM

pgj2015 wrote: »

Go back and read it again. where did I say I had some sort of confidence issues regarding having kids?

I don't want the responsibility of having kids, not because I lack confidence in raising kids. I enjoy my life as it is, I don't want children to change it.

pgj2015 wrote: »

I am 35 and am definitely never having kids. I couldn't cope with the fact i would be responsible for another human being for 18 years.

I think that 2nd post is what Seamus is referring to. Misunderstanding your phrase "couldn't cope" possibly.

pgj2015 · 05-04-2019 01:34PM

TheBoyConor wrote: »

Are you for real?

Jesus man, I really hope you are never in the position where a family member is getting news that they have motor neuron disease or incurable cancer. Sure I'm sure you will reassure them by saying, "well sis/bro, could be worse, at least you're not having a baby! Lucky break for you , wha?"

You'd wanna adjust your attitude.

The line in bold is funny but maybe it is you who should adjust your attitude as we just have differing points of view, no reason why i should adjust my attitude,i am very happy with my life, if you said you wanted 100 kids i wouldnt care so you shouldnt care about my attitude towards children.

Gimme A Pound · 05-04-2019 01:42PM

Trump Is Right wrote: »

Besides, having some horrible little runt for 18 years could easily be compared with having a terminal illness. At least with a terminal illness you get painkillers and a possible end date! :P

Stay classy.

05-04-2019 01:48PM

The talk of illnesses is highly inappropriate.

TheBoyConor · 05-04-2019 01:52PM

pgj2015 wrote: »

The line in bold is funny but maybe it is you who should adjust your attitude as we just have differing points of view, no reason why i should adjust my attitude,i am very happy with my life, if you said you wanted 100 kids i wouldnt care so you shouldnt care about my attitude towards children.

Like you, I have no interest whatsoever in having kids. I couldn't be dealing with the stress and hassle of them. No way.

You and I are both perfectly entitled to not want kids and not be shamed for it.

But what I do find offensive and object to is your flippant attitude with respect to preferring a terminal illness over a baby. If you had someone in your family who was given months to live and was about to die decades before their time then you would understand the extreme upset and grief these conditions cause to family and friends and you mightn't be quite so quick off the mark with your witty little quips and jokes about how a terminal illness is preferable to a having child. :mad::mad:

I've had a first cousin die at the age of 31 8 months after an ALS diagnosis and my father from cancer that had spread to his liver, lung and brain before it was detected.

I'd be ashamed to ever say such a thing even if my cousin and father were still with us. Fúck sake, shut your mouth, you're a disgrace.

I sincerely hope such a situation never occurs in your family.

Western Lowland Gorilla · 05-04-2019 02:16PM

TheBoyConor wrote: »

Like you, I have no interest whatsoever in having kids. I couldn't be dealing with the stress and hassle of them. No way.

You and I are both perfectly entitled to not want kids and not be shamed for it.

But what I do find offensive and object to is your flippant attitude with respect to preferring a terminal illness over a baby. If you had someone in your family who was given months to live and was about to die decades before their time then you would understand the extreme upset and grief these conditions cause to family and friends and you mightn't be quite so quick off the mark with your witty little quips and jokes about how a terminal illness is preferable to a having child. :mad::mad:

I've had a first cousin die at the age of 31 8 months after an ALS diagnosis and my father from cancer that had spread to his liver, lung and brain before it was detected.

I'd be ashamed to ever say such a thing even if my cousin and father were still with us. Fúck sake, shut your mouth, you're a disgrace.

I sincerely hope such a situation never occurs in your family.

I get the impression that they didn't want to back down from their initial remark and fought back against the replies.

Definitely ott but I don't think they reeeallly mean it.

Think the initial remark was off the cuff and now they are immaturely just arguing for the sake of it, not wanting to back down.

Anyway, back on topic.. Kids.. No thanks but each to their own..

kunst nugget · 05-04-2019 02:23PM

TheBoyConor wrote: »

Like you, I have no interest whatsoever in having kids. I couldn't be dealing with the stress and hassle of them. No way.

You and I are both perfectly entitled to not want kids and not be shamed for it.

But what I do find offensive and object to is your flippant attitude with respect to preferring a terminal illness over a baby. If you had someone in your family who was given months to live and was about to die decades before their time then you would understand the extreme upset and grief these conditions cause to family and friends and you mightn't be quite so quick off the mark with your witty little quips and jokes about how a terminal illness is preferable to a having child. :mad::mad:

I've had a first cousin die at the age of 31 8 months after an ALS diagnosis and my father from cancer that had spread to his liver, lung and brain before it was detected.

I'd be ashamed to ever say such a thing even if my cousin and father were still with us. Fúck sake, shut your mouth, you're a disgrace.

I sincerely hope such a situation never occurs in your family.

Relax the kacks, lad. You're working yourself into a frenzy over a stranger on the internet. You should probably take a break from the internet.

Gimme A Pound · 05-04-2019 02:25PM

Western Lowland Gorilla wrote: »

I get the impression that they didn't want to back down from their initial remark and fought back against the replies.

Definitely ott but I don't think they reeeallly mean it.

Think the initial remark was off the cuff and now they are immaturely just arguing for the sake of it, not wanting to back down.

Definitely. And if a person is gonna use the "I'm just expressing my view" line, well yes of course, and those who voice their objection are also just expressing their view.

Gimme A Pound · 05-04-2019 02:30PM

kunst nugget wrote: »

Relax the kacks, lad. You're working yourself into a frenzy over a stranger on the internet. You should probably take a break from the internet.

You're being a bit dismissive imo. Some things are just sh1tty things to say, internet stranger or not.

....... · 05-04-2019 02:32PM

TheBoyConor wrote: »

Like you, I have no interest whatsoever in having kids. I couldn't be dealing with the stress and hassle of them. No way.

You and I are both perfectly entitled to not want kids and not be shamed for it.

But what I do find offensive and object to is your flippant attitude with respect to preferring a terminal illness over a baby. If you had someone in your family who was given months to live and was about to die decades before their time then you would understand the extreme upset and grief these conditions cause to family and friends and you mightn't be quite so quick off the mark with your witty little quips and jokes about how a terminal illness is preferable to a having child. :mad::mad:

I've had a first cousin die at the age of 31 8 months after an ALS diagnosis and my father from cancer that had spread to his liver, lung and brain before it was detected.

I'd be ashamed to ever say such a thing even if my cousin and father were still with us. Fúck sake, shut your mouth, you're a disgrace.

I sincerely hope such a situation never occurs in your family.

Im sorry for your tragic stories but I feel like you are just looking for reasons to be offended.

An internet stranger says theyd rather a terminal illness than a baby. Its not a personal attack on you or your relatives.

Trump Is Right · 05-04-2019 02:36PM

TheBoyConor wrote: »

Like you, I have no interest whatsoever in having kids. I couldn't be dealing with the stress and hassle of them. No way.

You and I are both perfectly entitled to not want kids and not be shamed for it.

But what I do find offensive and object to is your flippant attitude with respect to preferring a terminal illness over a baby. If you had someone in your family who was given months to live and was about to die decades before their time then you would understand the extreme upset and grief these conditions cause to family and friends and you mightn't be quite so quick off the mark with your witty little quips and jokes about how a terminal illness is preferable to a having child. :mad::mad:

I've had a first cousin die at the age of 31 8 months after an ALS diagnosis and my father from cancer that had spread to his liver, lung and brain before it was detected.

I'd be ashamed to ever say such a thing even if my cousin and father were still with us. Fúck sake, shut your mouth, you're a disgrace.

I sincerely hope such a situation never occurs in your family.

Throwing a hissy-fit just because you can't force everyone to see things your way is a bit immature...

Do you think you are the only one who has dealt with tragedy in their life? The entire world has to deal with ****ty things... not just YOU! Not everyone reacts to these things the same way as you. And people are entitled to react how they wish.

For some people, there are worse fates than disease and death... you may not believe that, but it's true!

I would much prefer a miserable death, rather than a miserable life...

At least at the end of some horrible disease, you get to die! Sweet relief... where as a miserable life is much longer... it goes on for a lifetime!! (literally)

If someone wants to compare raising kids, as a fate worse than disease and death FOR THEM... then that's their opinion. They are entitled to it. You don't get to control other people's opinion, by throwing a tantrum!

Gimme A Pound · 05-04-2019 02:39PM

Trump Is Right wrote: »

Throwing a hissy-fit just because you can't force everyone to see things your way is a bit immature...

Do you think you are the only one who has dealt with tragedy in their life? The entire world has to deal with ****ty things... not just YOU! Not everyone reacts to these things the same way as you. And people are entitled to react how they wish.

For some people, there are worse fates than disease and death... you may not believe that, but it's true!

I would much prefer a miserable death, rather than a miserable life...

At least at the end of some horrible disease, you get to die! Sweet relief... where as a miserable life is much longer... it goes on for a lifetime!! (literally)

If someone wants to compare raising kids, as a fate worse than disease and death FOR THEM... then that's their opinion. They are entitled to it. You don't get to control other people's opinion, by throwing a tantrum!

Nobody's trying to control anyone. They are voicing their opinion also, nothing more.

Nobody can possibly know that they'd prefer terminal illness to having a child. And more than likely would prefer to live, even with a child on the way.

05-04-2019 02:42PM

I think this has taken a very dark turn. Can we not just go back to the financial burden etc. and leave these very subjective and strong opinions?

m5ex9oqjawdg2i · 05-04-2019 02:43PM

ibarelycare wrote: »

I’m nearly 34. Don’t want kids and neither does my bf. I’m terrified of regretting it when it’s too late, which is a very likely possibility. But for me that’s not a good enough reason to have one.

If you are terrified of regretting it you could look into freezing your eggs for a later date if you change your mind. Adoption is also an option.

Everybody has the right to decide on whether they want children or not. If you have an issue with that choice, you are an ignorant so and so.

TheBoyConor · 05-04-2019 02:48PM

I'm not trying to control your opinion. Have whatever the fúk opinion you like. Just know that if you have an unpopular opinion you might get called out on it. And I'm calling you out on your immature and insensitive comparisons and your even more immature defence of the indefencible.

I don't give a crap whether you have kids or not but it is not cool to make quips and jokes about terminal illnesses.

You know, with views like yours it is probably for the best that you do not have a child. You'd be an unfit parent.

You must be very young.

....... · 05-04-2019 02:55PM

TheBoyConor wrote: »

...it is not cool to make quips and jokes about terminal illnesses.

You are not the gatekeeper of humour.

Step away from the internet and have a lie down or something.

ibarelycare · 05-04-2019 03:00PM

Ush1 wrote: »

*citation needed

Source: am asshole

kunst nugget · 05-04-2019 03:00PM

Samira Shrilling Waistband wrote: »

You're being a bit dismissive imo. Some things are just sh1tty things to say, internet stranger or not.

Aye, I am being dismissive because a stupid hyperbolic comment like that made by a complete stranger was best ignored. Listing all the people you know that died of terminal illnesses just to show how offended you are is a tad OTT imo. If a comment like that is enough to set you off, I would think some counselling would be in order.

Anyone else not want children?

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