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Worst lyrics contained in a song?

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    #32
    Eggs For Dinner
    Registered Users Posts: 2,941 ✭✭✭Eggs For Dinner


    "Put your hands up like the ceiling can't hold us"

    You're on the floor mate, that's where you should be concerned that it might not be able to support your weight


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    #33
    Harry Palmr
    Closed Accounts Posts: 40,061 ✭✭✭✭Harry Palmr


    Cream's poet in residence Pete Brown came up with a few doozies but I'm reluctant to throw them in as somehow it works.

    Ah feck it here they are
    When I was young they gave me a mongrel piano,
    Spent all my time inventing the cup of tea.
    Writing your name in the sea,
    Banging my fav'rite head.

    Missing the last bed, waving a cheery herring,
    Balancing brass bands on the tip of my toe.
    Phoning your home from my tree,
    Drinking my fav'rite loch.

    When I was old they gave me a model factory,
    I met three salads out on the motorway.
    Leaving your name at the door,
    Breaking my fav'rite egg.

    Missing the walrus, sharing my last banana,
    Balancing zeppelins on the end of my nose.
    Calling your name in the zoo,
    Blowing my fav'rite mind.


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    #34
    Lord Glentoran
    Closed Accounts Posts: 876 ✭✭✭Lord Glentoran


    The Name of the Game from ABBA.

    Not so much an ear worm as a musical tapeworm

    What's the name of the game?
    Does it mean anything to you?
    What's the name of the game?
    Can you feel it the way I do?


    Tell me, please, 'cause I have to know
    I'm a bashful child beginning to grow


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    #35
    Church on Tuesday
    Registered Users Posts: 3,858 ✭✭✭Church on Tuesday


    peasant wrote: »
    Lennon/McCartney had a few gooduns too...

    to wit:

    Aided by any amount of psychedelics no doubt :)


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    #36
    bodhrandude
    Registered Users Posts: 12,401 ✭✭✭✭bodhrandude


    Syd Barrett from Pink Floyd had some curious lyrics, one of his solo tracks Dolly Rocker had the line ' You want to meet Pearl?
    she's as cute as a squirrel's nut. ' :):D

    If you want to get into it, you got to get out of it. (Hawkwind 1982)



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    #37
    dirkmeister
    Registered Users Posts: 2,650 ✭✭✭dirkmeister


    love the way your hair falls in the summer
    I'll treat you like your father treats your mother
    And I'm kinda scared of your older brother
    Oh yeah


    You play with my hair like there's no other
    And I'm no longer scared of your older brother
    He said, "we're cool, man, I know you love her"
    Oh yeah


    This is the kind of sh!t that helped Picture This sell out 5 nights at The Point.

    I hate people.


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    #38
    Faugheen
    Site Banned Posts: 12,341 ✭✭✭✭Faugheen


    Lads how has nobody mentioned Hanson yet?


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    #39
    razorblunt
    Registered Users Posts: 17,300 ✭✭✭✭razorblunt


    "Yes,yes, oh yeah".

    Mike Skinner from The Streets had an absolute hissy fit when Chris Moyles called those lyrics shíte and lazy.
    Moyles is shíte and lazy but he's not wrong.


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    #40
    NCS
    Registered Users Posts: 280 ✭✭NCS


    Sade's infamous "Coast to coast, LA to Chicago..."

    Birdy: "If these wings could fly"

    [Wings don't fly. They generate lift for the thing which actually does the flying. Being more accurate wouldn't have made the song any worse.]

    Dua Lipa: "One kiss is all it takes
    Fallin' in love with me"

    "Takes".
    "Me".

    Migraine.


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    #41
    AllForIt
    Registered Users Posts: 8,289 ✭✭✭AllForIt


    Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want
    So tell me what you want, what you really, really want
    I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want
    So tell me what you want, what you really, really want
    I wanna, (ha) I wanna, (ha) I wanna, (ha) I wanna, (ha)
    I wanna really, really, really wanna zigazig ah


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    #42
    buried
    Registered Users Posts: 9,681 ✭✭✭buried


    "are we human or are we dancer"

    Ye're neither. Ye're $hite

    "You have disgraced yourselves again" - W. B. Yeats



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    #43
    JuanBerrosa
    Registered Users Posts: 65 ✭✭JuanBerrosa


    Collie D wrote: »
    Regardless of your taste in music or the lyrics or whatever else, Adele can sing. Definitely has talent.

    She can .... and then she starts ****ing WAILING into the mic. and ruins it all!!


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    #44
    Littlehorny
    Registered Users Posts: 2,351 ✭✭✭Littlehorny


    Remember that ****e boyband JLS had a song that went "She makes me want to oh, oh, oh,oh,oh. She makes me want to oh,oh,oh,oh,oh" repeat about 10 times and that was about the whole song.
    Modern song writing scutter of the highest order.


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    #45
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    life by sade is absolute bollox


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    #46
    spock.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,502 ✭✭✭spock.


    He was a skater boy, she said see ya later boy


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    #47
    Capt'n Midnight
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 90,760 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    AllForIt wrote: »
    Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want
    So tell me what you want, what you really, really want
    I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want
    So tell me what you want, what you really, really want
    I wanna, (ha) I wanna, (ha) I wanna, (ha) I wanna, (ha)
    I wanna really, really, really wanna zigazig ah
    Ah, the motto for Brexit , you never find out what they really really want.

    Also
    "Slam your body down and wind it all around" :confused:


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    #48
    Capt'n Midnight
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 90,760 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    Near a tree by a river
    There's a hole in the ground
    Where an old man of Aran
    Goes around and around
    And his mind is a beacon
    In the veil of the night
    For a strange kind of fashion
    There's a wrong and a right
    But he'll never, never fight over you

    But, they were just place holder lyrics to fit the tune until something better came along.

    The moral is that if it's a good tune the lyrics aren't important.


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    #49
    Hercule Poirot
    Registered Users Posts: 4,231 ✭✭✭Hercule Poirot


    Harry Palmr wrote: »
    Ah come on Carly Simon did a drop the mic number on Warren Beatty with You're So Vain.

    My nomination looking beyond the obvious "Do Do Do Da Da Da" syncopation type nonsense is by Adrian Gurvitz

    " I'm going to write a classic
    I'm going to write it in an attic"

    It always makes me do a combined roll eyes/snigger with it's humourless sincere delivery

    I'm not saying You're So Vain isn't a great song - but that line literally makes no sense


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    #50
    Gimme A Pound
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,482 ✭✭✭Gimme A Pound


    Shakira - "Lucky that my breasts are small and humble, so you don't confuse them with mountains" - wtf?! I'm assuming it's a phrase that sounds less stupid in Spanish and was directly translated.

    "I've got all of Ethiopia... inside of me" - I mean really now Neneh Cherry.

    "Hail a gypsy cab takes me down from Harlem to the Brooklyn Bridge...
    Someone sleeps tonight with a hunger far more than an empty fridge." Alicia Keys singing bollox.
    Deleted User wrote: »
    life by sade is absolute bollox
    Des'ree - don't diss Sade! :)

    Although I never thought about that glaring error as mentioned above - "Coast to coast L.A to Chicago", haha. :D


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    #51
    Omackeral
    Registered Users Posts: 32,956 ✭✭✭✭Omackeral


    "We talked for hours and hours about Sweet and sour"

    You shut your fcuking red hole Ed Sheeran. Utter ****.

    Also this;

    22f40b22118abc2f3a8a53f6b83e27a2.jpg


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    #52
    Magnatu
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 260 ✭✭Magnatu


    bogmanfan wrote: »
    'I've got soul but I'm not a soldier'


    What is that supposed to mean? Shocking.
    Jimmy Bottlehead wrote: »
    "Are we human? Or are we dancer? "

    Neither mate. You're utter cack.

    These are the two that really bother me.


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    #53
    timthumbni
    Registered Users Posts: 4,845 ✭✭✭timthumbni


    Omackeral wrote: »
    "We talked for hours and hours about Sweet and sour"

    You shut your fcuking red hole Ed Sheeran. Utter ****.

    Also this;

    22f40b22118abc2f3a8a53f6b83e27a2.jpg

    To be fair few songs could compare to bohemian rhapsody. It’s pretty unique and doubt anything like it will ever be produced as a piece of music again.

    I saw Cheryl Cole on factor recently. I don’t watch the show but happened to see her whilst flicking channels. Jaysus for a good looking girl she really can bore the tits out of 3 minutes.


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    #54
    dr.fuzzenstein
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 16,635 ✭✭✭✭dr.fuzzenstein


    peasant wrote: »
    Lennon/McCartney had a few gooduns too...

    to wit:

    In fairness, Lennon was being mischievous with it and also said "let the fcukers work that one out".
    If you look closer at it, there are influences from Lewis Carroll, a nursery rhyme, two acid trips and references to transcendental meditation in it.
    You just don't get this class of nonsense anymore these days.
    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Am_the_Walrus


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    #55
    Zorya
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,194 ✭✭✭Zorya


    Squeeze me baby till the juice runs down my leg
    Squeeze my lemon baby till I fall right out of bed
    Bed bed bed and then a few yeahs I think

    Plus sorry Johnny Cash but I snigger every time you fall into the ring of fire and it burns burns burns the ring of fire

    As for

    You picked a fine time to leave me Lucille
    Four hundred children
    And a crop in the field
    :eek:

    But I may be mishearing :pac:


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    #56
    Sebastian Dangerfield
    Registered Users Posts: 1,793 ✭✭✭Sebastian Dangerfield


    Freedom has a scent
    Like the top of a newborn babies head

    U2


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    #57
    Spleerbun
    Registered Users Posts: 262 ✭✭Spleerbun


    Not sure if anyone has mentioned Pitbull yet, probably because he jusy says so many absolutely ridiculous things that people just tune him out when he comes in on a song. The famous "Kodak" line of course springs to mind, or my personal favourite:

    "Honey got me swishing like a dreadlock, she don't wrestle but I got her in a headlock, yabba dabba doo"


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    #58
    standardg60
    Registered Users Posts: 4,288 ✭✭✭standardg60


    Hercule Poirot wrote: »
    I'm not saying You're So Vain isn't a great song - but that line literally makes no sense

    One of the greatest and most ironic lines in song writing history..what's not to understand about it?
    By never revealing who it was about, anyone who did think it was about them, including Beatty, proved her point!


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    #59
    timthumbni
    Registered Users Posts: 4,845 ✭✭✭timthumbni


    Sebastian Dangerfield wrote: »
    Freedom has a scent
    Like the top of a newborn babies head

    U2

    I actually used to like U2. Now I actually have to turn off any music source with them in it within 10 seconds as otherwise I get a nervous tick.


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    #60
    Sebastian Dangerfield
    Registered Users Posts: 1,793 ✭✭✭Sebastian Dangerfield


    timthumbni wrote: »
    I actually used to like U2. Now I actually have to turn off any music source with them in it within 10 seconds as otherwise I get a nervous tick.

    Im the very same. The only thing more annoying to me than the sound of Bono's voice is a video of Bono with sound on it


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    #61
    Wheeliebin30
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,593 ✭✭✭Wheeliebin30


    Hercule Poirot wrote: »
    "You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you...."

    Yeah, makes sense....?

    It does to people with some sense.


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