Fcuking Prick of a cat

fritzelly · 02-08-2018 11:24PM

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

Cats are natural born killers OP.

If you were smaller than a cat it would rip your head from your shoulders without batting an eyelid.

If you suddenly died and were it's only food source it would eat you without batting an eyelid
A dog would mourn you til it died of starvation

Never trust a cat, when it brings its kills into the home it's not saying look how clever I am - it's saying stop feeding me and you know what will happen

Outlaw Pete · 02-08-2018 11:26PM

Well stop it! It's illegal.

GoneHome · 02-08-2018 11:28PM

fritzelly wrote: »

Never trust a cat, when it brings its kills into the home it's not saying look how clever I am - it's saying stop feeding me and you know what will happen

I just spilt my beer laughing at this, brilliant

Roger Hassenforder · 02-08-2018 11:31PM

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

Cats are natural born killers OP.

If you were smaller than a cat it would rip your head from your shoulders without batting an eyelid.

If something was about to rip my head from my shoulders, I'd certainly bat an eyelid or two

DEFTLEFTHAND · 02-08-2018 11:31PM

fritzelly wrote: »

If you suddenly died and were it's only food source it would eat you without batting an eyelid
A dog would mourn you til it died of starvation

Never trust a cat, when it brings its kills into the home it's not saying look how clever I am - it's saying stop feeding me and you know what will happen

That's clever. Stay alive by any means neccessary.

They're like humans. Remember the Andes plane crash in 1972?

GoneHome · 02-08-2018 11:32PM

fritzelly wrote: »

If you suddenly died and were it's only food source it would eat you without batting an eyelid
A dog would mourn you til it died of starvation

Yes isn't it that a cat would start to eat your dead body after four days if it had no other food source

Roger Hassenforder · 02-08-2018 11:32PM

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

That's clever. Stay alive by any means neccessary.

They're like humans. Remember the Andes plane crash in 1972?

They were rugby players though. They've been known to munch on an ear , while the owner was still alive and attached to it.

Noveight · 02-08-2018 11:34PM

Cats are bastards. Some dogs are bastards, especially terriers.

mdwexford · 02-08-2018 11:37PM

freshpopcorn wrote: »

Just stand on the mouse!

What kind of sick weirdo are you.

fritzelly · 02-08-2018 11:38PM

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/01/07/cats-facts-jerks_n_4520552.html

Goes off to ponder why single old cat loving women minding 15 cats tend to be on the larger size....

Roger Hassenforder · 02-08-2018 11:43PM

Noveight wrote: »

Cats are bastards. Some dogs are bastards, especially terriers.

In fairness, the only thing a bigger prick than a cat is a terrier.

DEFTLEFTHAND · 02-08-2018 11:45PM

fritzelly wrote: »

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/01/07/cats-facts-jerks_n_4520552.html

Goes off to ponder why single old cat loving women minding 15 cats tend to be on the larger size....

Fur babies.

DEFTLEFTHAND · 02-08-2018 11:47PM

Roger Hassenforder wrote: »

In fairness, the only thing a bigger prick than a cat is a terrier.

My late cat had a hunting partnership with my Jack Russell. The two were deadly together.

Russells are great ratters.

taytobreath · 02-08-2018 11:51PM

GoneHome wrote: »

Yes isn't it that a cat would start to eat your dead body after four days if it had no other food source

Its true.
A neighbor of mine died in his home and was there for about 6 weeks, he had been caring for a cat and her kittens at the time and he left his bathroom window open and when they found him most of his face was gone. The cats got into him and ate his face.

I adopted one of those cats and he still is here. A relative of the dead guy wanted to have the cats poisoned because of what they done. I got homes for all of them.

fritzelly · 03-08-2018 12:02AM

taytobreath wrote: »

Its true.
A neighbor of mine died in his home and was there for about 6 weeks, he had been caring for a cat and her kittens at the time and he left his bathroom window open and when they found him most of his face was gone. The cats got into him and ate his face.

I adopted one of those cats and he still is here. A relative of the dead guy wanted to have the cats poisoned because of what they done. I got homes for all of them.

Brave man - hope you're not a deep sleeper

GoneHome · 03-08-2018 12:15AM

taytobreath wrote: »

The cats got into him and ate his face.

Oh Jesus H Christ I won't sleep for the night now thinking of that and my cat asleep in the next room:eek:

Carry · 03-08-2018 12:21AM

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

My late cat had a hunting partnership with my Jack Russell. The two were deadly together.

Russells are great ratters.

My late beagle/pointer had that hunting partnership with my cat. When the cat released the live mouse in the house the two of them were in perfect harmony, wrecking the place as collateral damage while barking, chasing. encircling and terrifying the mouse.

Usually I interfered with the fireplace tongs to catch the mouse and throw the poor creature out into the garden. The dog looked open-mouthed and confused at me, the cat sashayed off and was cross for about, well, until the next feeding time.

Since the dog died last Easter the cat doesn't bring any mouse back to me. Probably he just wanted to impress the dog ... or whatever.

jonon9 · 03-08-2018 12:22AM

Captain Red Beard wrote: »

All cats are bastards.

flossy1 · 03-08-2018 12:23AM

We had a young cat, come into bedroom through the window with a young mouse . She let the mouse go so I was up all night trying to kill it . you are right she was too well fed

AllForIt · 03-08-2018 01:49AM

taytobreath wrote: »

Its true.
A neighbor of mine died in his home and was there for about 6 weeks, he had been caring for a cat and her kittens at the time and he left his bathroom window open and when they found him most of his face was gone. The cats got into him and ate his face.

I adopted one of those cats and he still is here. A relative of the dead guy wanted to have the cats poisoned because of what they done. I got homes for all of them.

Sweet story.

Purple Mountain · 03-08-2018 01:54AM

taytobreath wrote: »

Its true.
A neighbor of mine died in his home and was there for about 6 weeks, he had been caring for a cat and her kittens at the time and he left his bathroom window open and when they found him most of his face was gone. The cats got into him and ate his face.

I adopted one of those cats and he still is here. A relative of the dead guy wanted to have the cats poisoned because of what they done. I got homes for all of them.

So let me get this straight..
You brought a cannibal cat into your home??

Hammer89 · 03-08-2018 02:09AM

Roger Hassenforder wrote: »

Wouldn't buy them anywhere else!

Can you buy them anywhere else?

Grandeeod · 03-08-2018 02:36AM

Feckin cat nibbled at my plated dinner tonight and destroyed it. Bitch!

GoneHome · 03-08-2018 02:56AM

Grandeeod wrote: »

Feckin cat nibbled at my plated dinner tonight and destroyed it. Bitch!

Mine did that to a fresh sliced pan a couple of weeks ago, just got into the crust of two slices but it put me right off so I dumped the whole thing (the bread I mean, I didn't dump the cat!)

Grandeeod · 03-08-2018 03:03AM

GoneHome wrote: »

Mine did that to a fresh sliced pan a couple of weeks ago, just got into the crust of two slices but it put me right off so I dumped the whole thing (the bread I mean, I didn't dump the cat!)

I sent her out to the garden in disgust and stood by my intention to leave her out all night, Went for a late after work beer, came home and met her on the windowsill. Now she's camped out in my daughters room. I'm far too soft.:D:D and feckin hungry.:eek:

GoneHome · 03-08-2018 03:13AM

Grandeeod wrote: »

I sent her out to the garden in disgust and stood by my intention to leave her out all night, Went for a late after work beer, came home and met her on the windowsill. Now she's camped out in my daughters room. I'm far too soft.:D:D and feckin hungry.:eek:

I know what you mean, you couldn't stay angry with them for long, I was away for the last four days and had a friend calling to feed her so when I got back tonight I was delighted to see her at the back door waiting for me but then when I read earlier in this thread about the cat eating the dead man's face I'm starting to see her in a different light

prinzeugen · 03-08-2018 03:19AM

It not the having, it is the getting that is the fun part. Same with most forms of inelegant life.

From the cats point of view, he is catching the mouse multiple times which is more fun than having it. When it gets bored, it will move on to the next mouse.

Same with humans and phones. Stand outside a shop for hours to get the latest phone and get bored of it a week later, so then we start looking for the next thing.

prinzeugen · 03-08-2018 03:24AM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7lV6YzD04YY

GoneHome · 03-08-2018 03:25AM

prinzeugen wrote: »

When it gets bored, it will move on to the next mouse

It's like a metaphor for life in a lot of ways and probably not in a good way

derfderf · 03-08-2018 03:44AM

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

Cats are natural born killers OP.

If you were smaller than a cat it would rip your head from your shoulders without batting an eyelid.

I always used to be jealous of trainers playing with big cats, until i got a regular cat. He purrs while biting me, it's so unsettling. If he was a lion I'd be long dead by now.
Generally waits until me or the Mrs (moreso her) are on our own to attack. It makes sense i suppose. On our own we'd have much less chance dealing with 3kg of rage.

Fcuking Prick of a cat

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