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Fcuking Prick of a cat

Roger Hassenforder

He's been playing with a mouse since 6.30pm in the garden.

Toying with the poor crather. Smallest cutest mouse ever. Stays still for ages, makes a run for it thinks he's away and basterd cat just stretches a paw and flicks him up in the air, and scoops him back in, and licks/sucks it. Being going on hours.

Just after distracting the fcuker with a few dreamies, picked up the mouse and put him somewhere safe. Cat now looking frantically for him where he lasr saw him.

They're cruel fcukers.
Should have got a dog.

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fritzelly

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

Cats are natural born killers OP.

If you were smaller than a cat it would rip your head from your shoulders without batting an eyelid.

If you suddenly died and were it's only food source it would eat you without batting an eyelid
A dog would mourn you til it died of starvation

Never trust a cat, when it brings its kills into the home it's not saying look how clever I am - it's saying stop feeding me and you know what will happen

Outlaw Pete

Well stop it! It's illegal.

GoneHome

fritzelly wrote: »

Never trust a cat, when it brings its kills into the home it's not saying look how clever I am - it's saying stop feeding me and you know what will happen

I just spilt my beer laughing at this, brilliant

Roger Hassenforder

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

Cats are natural born killers OP.

If you were smaller than a cat it would rip your head from your shoulders without batting an eyelid.

If something was about to rip my head from my shoulders, I'd certainly bat an eyelid or two

DEFTLEFTHAND

fritzelly wrote: »

If you suddenly died and were it's only food source it would eat you without batting an eyelid
A dog would mourn you til it died of starvation

Never trust a cat, when it brings its kills into the home it's not saying look how clever I am - it's saying stop feeding me and you know what will happen

That's clever. Stay alive by any means neccessary.

They're like humans. Remember the Andes plane crash in 1972?

GoneHome

fritzelly wrote: »

If you suddenly died and were it's only food source it would eat you without batting an eyelid
A dog would mourn you til it died of starvation

Yes isn't it that a cat would start to eat your dead body after four days if it had no other food source

Roger Hassenforder

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

That's clever. Stay alive by any means neccessary.

They're like humans. Remember the Andes plane crash in 1972?

They were rugby players though. They've been known to munch on an ear , while the owner was still alive and attached to it.

Noveight

Cats are bastards. Some dogs are bastards, especially terriers.

mdwexford

freshpopcorn wrote: »

Just stand on the mouse!

What kind of sick weirdo are you.

fritzelly

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/01/07/cats-facts-jerks_n_4520552.html

Goes off to ponder why single old cat loving women minding 15 cats tend to be on the larger size....

Roger Hassenforder

Noveight wrote: »

Cats are bastards. Some dogs are bastards, especially terriers.

In fairness, the only thing a bigger prick than a cat is a terrier.

DEFTLEFTHAND

fritzelly wrote: »

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/01/07/cats-facts-jerks_n_4520552.html

Goes off to ponder why single old cat loving women minding 15 cats tend to be on the larger size....

Fur babies.

DEFTLEFTHAND

Roger Hassenforder wrote: »

In fairness, the only thing a bigger prick than a cat is a terrier.

My late cat had a hunting partnership with my Jack Russell. The two were deadly together.

Russells are great ratters.

taytobreath

GoneHome wrote: »

Yes isn't it that a cat would start to eat your dead body after four days if it had no other food source

Its true.
A neighbor of mine died in his home and was there for about 6 weeks, he had been caring for a cat and her kittens at the time and he left his bathroom window open and when they found him most of his face was gone. The cats got into him and ate his face.

I adopted one of those cats and he still is here. A relative of the dead guy wanted to have the cats poisoned because of what they done. I got homes for all of them.

fritzelly

taytobreath wrote: »

Its true.
A neighbor of mine died in his home and was there for about 6 weeks, he had been caring for a cat and her kittens at the time and he left his bathroom window open and when they found him most of his face was gone. The cats got into him and ate his face.

I adopted one of those cats and he still is here. A relative of the dead guy wanted to have the cats poisoned because of what they done. I got homes for all of them.

Brave man - hope you're not a deep sleeper

GoneHome

taytobreath wrote: »

The cats got into him and ate his face.

Oh Jesus H Christ I won't sleep for the night now thinking of that and my cat asleep in the next room:eek:

Carry

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

My late cat had a hunting partnership with my Jack Russell. The two were deadly together.

Russells are great ratters.

My late beagle/pointer had that hunting partnership with my cat. When the cat released the live mouse in the house the two of them were in perfect harmony, wrecking the place as collateral damage while barking, chasing. encircling and terrifying the mouse.

Usually I interfered with the fireplace tongs to catch the mouse and throw the poor creature out into the garden. The dog looked open-mouthed and confused at me, the cat sashayed off and was cross for about, well, until the next feeding time.

Since the dog died last Easter the cat doesn't bring any mouse back to me. Probably he just wanted to impress the dog ... or whatever.

jonon9

Captain Red Beard wrote: »

All cats are bastards.

flossy1

We had a young cat, come into bedroom through the window with a young mouse . She let the mouse go so I was up all night trying to kill it . you are right she was too well fed

AllForIt

taytobreath wrote: »

Its true.
A neighbor of mine died in his home and was there for about 6 weeks, he had been caring for a cat and her kittens at the time and he left his bathroom window open and when they found him most of his face was gone. The cats got into him and ate his face.

I adopted one of those cats and he still is here. A relative of the dead guy wanted to have the cats poisoned because of what they done. I got homes for all of them.

Sweet story.

Purple Mountain

taytobreath wrote: »

Its true.
A neighbor of mine died in his home and was there for about 6 weeks, he had been caring for a cat and her kittens at the time and he left his bathroom window open and when they found him most of his face was gone. The cats got into him and ate his face.

I adopted one of those cats and he still is here. A relative of the dead guy wanted to have the cats poisoned because of what they done. I got homes for all of them.

So let me get this straight..
You brought a cannibal cat into your home??

Hammer89

Roger Hassenforder wrote: »

Wouldn't buy them anywhere else!

Can you buy them anywhere else?

Grandeeod

Feckin cat nibbled at my plated dinner tonight and destroyed it. Bitch!

GoneHome

Grandeeod wrote: »

Feckin cat nibbled at my plated dinner tonight and destroyed it. Bitch!

Mine did that to a fresh sliced pan a couple of weeks ago, just got into the crust of two slices but it put me right off so I dumped the whole thing (the bread I mean, I didn't dump the cat!)

Grandeeod

GoneHome wrote: »

Mine did that to a fresh sliced pan a couple of weeks ago, just got into the crust of two slices but it put me right off so I dumped the whole thing (the bread I mean, I didn't dump the cat!)

I sent her out to the garden in disgust and stood by my intention to leave her out all night, Went for a late after work beer, came home and met her on the windowsill. Now she's camped out in my daughters room. I'm far too soft.:D:D and feckin hungry.:eek:

GoneHome

Grandeeod wrote: »

I sent her out to the garden in disgust and stood by my intention to leave her out all night, Went for a late after work beer, came home and met her on the windowsill. Now she's camped out in my daughters room. I'm far too soft.:D:D and feckin hungry.:eek:

I know what you mean, you couldn't stay angry with them for long, I was away for the last four days and had a friend calling to feed her so when I got back tonight I was delighted to see her at the back door waiting for me but then when I read earlier in this thread about the cat eating the dead man's face I'm starting to see her in a different light

prinzeugen

It not the having, it is the getting that is the fun part. Same with most forms of inelegant life.

From the cats point of view, he is catching the mouse multiple times which is more fun than having it. When it gets bored, it will move on to the next mouse.

Same with humans and phones. Stand outside a shop for hours to get the latest phone and get bored of it a week later, so then we start looking for the next thing.

prinzeugen

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7lV6YzD04YY

GoneHome

prinzeugen wrote: »

When it gets bored, it will move on to the next mouse

It's like a metaphor for life in a lot of ways and probably not in a good way

derfderf

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

Cats are natural born killers OP.

If you were smaller than a cat it would rip your head from your shoulders without batting an eyelid.

I always used to be jealous of trainers playing with big cats, until i got a regular cat. He purrs while biting me, it's so unsettling. If he was a lion I'd be long dead by now.
Generally waits until me or the Mrs (moreso her) are on our own to attack. It makes sense i suppose. On our own we'd have much less chance dealing with 3kg of rage.