I just......

me_irl · 27-04-2017 01:26PM

Well done.

kfallon · 27-04-2017 01:49PM

Say your bunghole was like a bloodorange after squeezing out a 6 day baked bum loaf!

nullzero · 27-04-2017 02:14PM

Irish Guitarist wrote: »

Did you leave it under the pillow for the shite fairy?

Sorry to tell you but the poo fairy doesn't exist.

Outlaw Pete · 27-04-2017 02:25PM

thelad95 wrote: »

...followed seconds later by a big glorious type 3.

So, just to be clear, you describe a Type 3 (phallic shaped) shite stretching your ring as being "glorious" and the "greatest high known to mankind"?

Have you ever thought about going for a drink in The George, OP... you may just have discovered your G spot?

ToddyDoody · 28-04-2017 04:23PM

thelad95 wrote: »

Had my first sh*te in 6 days, I swear this is the greatest high known to mankind.

I feel so light like I could run a marathon now if I wanted.

The fertiliser company won't be recruiting you any time soon.

Harry Palmr · 28-04-2017 06:10PM

Six days?! Fancy giving us a glimpse of your typical grocery list? Do you ever do any exercise?

greencap · 28-04-2017 06:58PM

Harry Palmr wrote: »

Six days?! Fancy giving us a glimpse of your typical grocery list? Do you ever do any exercise?

FFS 6 days. I'd say its pancakes and lard, with chips and bread.

I'd normally be jealous of a 6 day-er, but recently discovered a secret technique that almost instantly doubles standard yield.

You just have to raise your feet on something solid so you're in a more squat position. They make special foot stools for it.

Its amazing. Plus rumor has it several people, by way of using this technique, have achieved the fabled no-wiper.

Elemonator · 28-04-2017 07:02PM

What have I walked in on.........

Harry Palmr · 28-04-2017 07:02PM

Yep I'm aware of the "Asian" squat stance, makes sense when you think about it.

TerrorFirmer · 28-04-2017 07:08PM

My housemate actually bought a 'squatty potty' as a joke but now insists it's the only way he can go. Haven't tried it yet. Perhaps I'm missing out on a sensational experience.

Six days though, good god. I mean, when you think of all the food you're eating on a daily basis and for six days it's just backing up in your system with nowhere to go....a friend of mine didn't go for something like 10 days once and had to go to the doctor about it in the end. Towards the end of the ordeal he was actually hobbling around like a decrepit 105 year old man.

greencap · 28-04-2017 07:10PM

I just......

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