controlling partner?

....... · 09-01-2017 04:52PM

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....... · 09-01-2017 04:53PM

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rondog · 09-01-2017 04:59PM

It is normal.Some people hit a punch bag to release stress,some lift weights,some might throw an object.Some people might shout and clench their fists.
Its widely known that people that suppress anger and frustration have it manifested in other malign health issues.
Once someone isn't going around hitting people its

....... · 09-01-2017 05:01PM

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rondog · 09-01-2017 05:04PM

Kicking a chair is also controlled in that its not someone you are hitting nor is it a verbal assault on a client that would not go down well.Instead,its venting anger at an inanimate object that doesn't feel hurt and enables you to release pent up anger.

GingerLily · 09-01-2017 05:05PM

rondog wrote: »

It is normal.Some people hit a punch bag to release stress,some lift weights,some might throw an object.Some people might shout and clench their fists.
Its widely known that people that suppress anger and frustration have it manifested in other malign health issues.
Once someone isn't going around hitting people its

When you shout and punch walls in front of your partner and tell them you hate them do you apologise afterwards? Do you make amends? Do you own up to your bad behaviour? Have you ever considered anger management?

I grew up in a home full of domestic violence, I thought it was the norm until I became an adult. And to be honest it doesn't even matter if it is the norm, the OP does not want this, and that alone is enough reason for her to walk away.

twill · 09-01-2017 05:07PM

rondog wrote: »

It is normal.Some people hit a punch bag to release stress,some lift weights,some might throw an object.Some people might shout and clench their fists.
Its widely known that people that suppress anger and frustration have it manifested in other malign health issues.
Once someone isn't going around hitting people its

You're seriously trying to normalise roaring abuse into someone's face?

....... · 09-01-2017 05:07PM

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09-01-2017 05:14PM

rondog wrote: »

I work for a multinational corporate and ive seen people kick things,throw things at every level when they get angry

rondog wrote: »

I work in a highly pressurised/stressful environment and its quite common for people to vent their anger by throwing things,kicking a wall etc.

I'm fascinated to know what you think is a highly pressurised enough work environment to justify throwing things and kicking walls. :eek:

implausible · 09-01-2017 05:17PM

rondog wrote: »

Again, I know of a good few relationships where partners scream at eachother and get angry/throw things,these people also happen to be in very happy and strong relationships.

I'm going to guess that the reason these relationships are "happy and strong" is because (a) they apologise and make up afterwards and (b) there are two of them doing it.

In this case, the OP's partner has not apologised, has said he will do it again and is implying it's her fault. Also, only one person was being roared at. Does that really sound happy and strong to you?

njs030 · 09-01-2017 05:19PM

rondog wrote: »

Kicking a chair is also controlled in that its not someone you are hitting nor is it a verbal assault on a client that would not go down well.Instead,its venting anger at an inanimate object that doesn't feel hurt and enables you to release pent up anger.

Self control in the work place and in personal situations is very important.
You should have skills to deal with situations without it spiralling into pent up anger and needing to kick and punch anything. Trying to justify it because other people do it is just an excuse, screaming abuse at your partner is abuse and thank goodness most people can see that and won't put up with it.

Even really stressful jobs like police etc don't routinely act in that manner.

09-01-2017 08:04PM

shesty · 10-01-2017 11:43PM

rondog wrote: »

Kicking a chair is also controlled in that its not someone you are hitting nor is it a verbal assault on a client that would not go down well.Instead,its venting anger at an inanimate object that doesn't feel hurt and enables you to release pent up anger.

I have worked in several workplaces-including a number of years on building sites where, let's face it, things can be rough-and I have never seen or heard of anyone who thought it ok to vent their anger in a physical manner in the workplace.Where on earth do you work? It seems incredibly childish that any adult would be in so little control of themselves and their emotions that they would behave like that. Nor do I know anyone who thinks it's ok to treat family and friends like that.It's not.It might be normal to you but that doesn't make it ok.

OP if he reacted in such a violent manner to something so minor (relatively speaking), and would be ok with reacting that way again, I can't inagine how he might react to something he perceived as being a major issue. Please take the advice offered here.I know it's easy for us to say, and incredibly hard for you to do, but I think you would be doing the right thing.

controlling partner?

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