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General Chat Thread (PLEASE READ POST #1)

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Comments

  • #452
    Faith
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,662 Mod ✭✭✭✭Faith


    Addle wrote: »
    I was going to go to the church alone and not go to the reception, but bride told me not to bother with church when I let her know.

    :eek::eek:

    Weren't you doing a reading?! What a bitch! Doesn't sound like there was much of a friendship there if she over-reacted like that.


  • #453
    Addle
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,817 ✭✭✭Addle


    Faith wrote: »
    :eek::eek:

    Weren't you doing a reading?! What a bitch! Doesn't sound like there was much of a friendship there if she over-reacted like that.

    Ya, it's certainly made me think.
    I feel bad about it all and she probably hasn't given it another thought.


  • #454
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 17,847 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Would many invitees turn up unexpected, as in they don't bother answering invitation, yet come anyway?


  • #455
    stargazer 68
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,196 ✭✭✭stargazer 68


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Would many invitees turn up unexpected, as in they don't bother answering invitation, yet come anyway?

    Well they shouldnt do but Im sure some would. When my sister was doing her invites the woman who did them was saying that her daughter got married a couple of years ago.

    When the date had passed and the replies hadn't been received she text everyone who hadn't responded and said 'so sorry you can't make it to the wedding - we were looking forward to seeing you'. Replies soon turned up :D


  • #456
    Sarah1916
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 252 ✭✭Sarah1916


    Dovies wrote: »
    Well they shouldnt do but Im sure some would. When my sister was doing her invites the woman who did them was saying that her daughter got married a couple of years ago.

    When the date had passed and the replies hadn't been received she text everyone who hadn't responded and said 'so sorry you can't make it to the wedding - we were looking forward to seeing you'. Replies soon turned up :D

    that is a great idea ;)
    Might try that when my time comes for receiving replies.
    Nothing like a bit of scaremongering to get answers


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  • #457
    ChampagnePop
    Closed Accounts Posts: 501 ✭✭✭ChampagnePop


    Addle wrote: »
    Ya, it's certainly made me think.
    I feel bad about it all and she probably hasn't given it another thought.

    Really sorry to hear, she doesn't deserve your friendship - your much better off without false people like that in your life.


  • #458
    stargazer 68
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,196 ✭✭✭stargazer 68


    Sarah1916 wrote: »
    that is a great idea ;)
    Might try that when my time comes for receiving replies.
    Nothing like a bit of scaremongering to get answers

    I will be adopting this approach myself! ;)


  • #459
    Gatica
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,302 ✭✭✭Gatica


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Would many invitees turn up unexpected, as in they don't bother answering invitation, yet come anyway?
    people are forgetful. The best thing to do is chase up any stragglers on the RSVP after the date you've given has passed. With friends we basically texted them, some facebooked and with family just gave them a buzz. I guess this would be more complicated if you're having a huge wedding.


  • #460
    SarahMollie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,841 ✭✭✭SarahMollie


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Would many invitees turn up unexpected, as in they don't bother answering invitation, yet come anyway?

    They should obviously but I think it depends on the personalities and relationships. For example, my OH had 3 invites addressed to him this year, he didnt reply to one of them, but that was really becouse he's close with the lads getting married and they already knew he (we) were going regardless, so everyone just took it as a given.

    I'd 2 on my side, one was a colleague so I just told him in work that we'd be coming (that invite didnt contain an RSVP card, just phone numbers to text), and the other couple live out of the country but had a website set up, so I was able to RSVP using a form on that which was super easy.

    I think giving people electronic options to RSVP is a good idea versus having to send back a card, although some people who are more traditional may not like this approach. As with many things about weddings, you can't please all of the people all of the time.


  • #461
    cactusgal
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 830 ✭✭✭cactusgal


    cactusgal wrote: »
    Disclaimer: I know that weddings are expensive and that brides and grooms can ask (or not ask) anyone they want for their day. But. I just got an invite to a family wedding with no plus one. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years and we live together. Granted, the bridal couple barely know him, so I get it, but boo :( I know that it's an invite and not a summons, but I feel kind of obligated to go bc one of my siblings is coming from abroad to attend, they haven't been given a plus one either, and wouldn't like to go on their own. But I wish my boyfriend could come, too!!
    Rant over.

    Do you think it would be rude to ask if I can bring my boyfriend to the afters, or is that an etiquette no-no?


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  • #462
    SarahMollie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,841 ✭✭✭SarahMollie


    cactusgal wrote: »
    Do you think it would be rude to ask if I can bring my boyfriend to the afters, or is that an etiquette no-no?

    My instinct is that it wouldn't hurt to ask. There would be very little financial impact on the couple by just having another guest for the afters, so you never know.

    The only reason I can think of to refuse this request is if they've already not offered it to other people, but if there are others already with an afters invite, I can't see how its too much of an imposition.

    Have you expressed your dissatisfaction at not getting a +1?


  • #463
    cactusgal
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 830 ✭✭✭cactusgal


    SarahMollie wrote: »

    Have you expressed your dissatisfaction at not getting a +1?

    Only on here and to my boyfriend!! I don't want to be rude or make a fuss, it's not that big a deal, just odd in that we've been together longer than the wedding couple. If numbers are an issue, I think it's better to extend an afters invite to the couple rather than a full invite to just one person.


  • #464
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 13,839 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    My dads just had a serious turn. I'm typing this from beside his hospital bed. My wedding is just over 3 weeks away and he won't be able to be there.

    This happened yesterday and the thought of wedding entered my head. I was so mad at myself for thinking about it. My sister brought the subject up today and said I can't just ignore that it's only a few weeks away and make some kind of decision.

    I'm typing this to you's as it means not opening my mouth and talking. I don't know what to do.


  • #465
    lazygal
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,644 ✭✭✭✭lazygal


    Strawberry Milkshake wrote: »
    My dads just had a serious turn. I'm typing this from beside his hospital bed. My wedding is just over 3 weeks away and he won't be able to be there.

    This happened yesterday and the thought of wedding entered my head. I was so mad at myself for thinking about it. My sister brought the subject up today and said I can't just ignore that it's only a few weeks away and make some kind of decision.

    I'm typing this to you's as it means not opening my mouth and talking. I don't know what to do.
    You poor thing. There is no need to make decisions about anything, focus on your dad and never mind the wedding. Things can always be sorted out at a later date.


  • #466
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 13,839 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    But we have people travelling from a few countries. Others would have made reservations so it would be rude to ignore it. I'm dreading saying anything to my oh as he has family travelling too.

    If I could, I'd ignore it but my sister is right, other people deserve to know.


  • #467
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 17,847 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Strawberry Milkshake wrote: »
    My dads just had a serious turn. I'm typing this from beside his hospital bed. My wedding is just over 3 weeks away and he won't be able to be there.

    This happened yesterday and the thought of wedding entered my head. I was so mad at myself for thinking about it. My sister brought the subject up today and said I can't just ignore that it's only a few weeks away and make some kind of decision.

    I'm typing this to you's as it means not opening my mouth and talking. I don't know what to do.

    You poor thing. Concentrate on your Dad. I'm sure all the Wedding plans are well under way, so delegate to a close friend. Don't start changing plans. Keep strong. x x


  • #468
    Faith
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,662 Mod ✭✭✭✭Faith


    So sorry to hear that, Strawberry :(. That's an absolutely awful situation for you. You need to do whatever you feel is best. Could you speak to your dad about it, if he's able for talking?


  • #469
    Toots
    Administrators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,992 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Toots


    Aw Strawberry that's terrible, you poor thing, and your poor dad. Don't be mad at yourself that the wedding popped into your head, that's perfectly normal. It doesn't mean you're any less worried about your dad. What is your gut telling you to do? Have you a feeling on what you'd feel more comfortable doing?


  • #470
    Addle
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,817 ✭✭✭Addle


    Hope your dad is improving it at least has some relief strawberry.


  • #471
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 17,847 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Another Bridezilla story.

    "When the bride finally found the wedding dress she liked - a stunning satin Marchesa gown that retailed at a staggering $10,500 - her friends soon received another group email.
    She would really love it if we could 'pitch in' around $150 each towards her 'dream dress' - that it'd mean so very much to her
    This one was entitled 'Bridesmaid dress contribution.' which made her break out in a cold sweat.
    The long email outlined how the couple were now really over budget after the expensive outlay for the dress.
    'It was "totally fine if you can't" but she would really love if we could "pitch in" around $150 each towards her "dream dress". That it'd mean so very much to her and would mean that as she walked down the aisle, she'd be wearing something we'd all had a part in.'
    As the writer bluntly posts, Carol was 'essentially asking her bridal party to chip in for her dress'.
    Aside from their own $550 bridesmaid outfit, the accommodation for the wedding, the hen's party, bridal shower AND three spa days planned, Carol's bridesmaids were also expected to chip in for Carol's dress.
    'I nearly threw my phone across the room, such was the rage that consumed me,' the anonymous poster says.
    'I'm starting to think I might have to bail on this wedding, and friendship.'"

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3653595/Woman-tells-bride-friend-asked-chip-wedding-dress.html


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  • #472
    Toots
    Administrators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,992 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Toots


    Nooooope! I'd be sending 150 in monopoly money along with a letter or resignation from bridesmaid duties.


  • #473
    Sapphire
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 390 ✭✭Sapphire


    Some people really do lose the run of themselves in a wedding, don't they?


  • #474
    Toots
    Administrators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,992 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Toots


    Sapphire wrote: »
    Some people really do lose the run of themselves in a wedding, don't they?

    I've said it before and I'll say it again; modding this forum is a real eye-opener!!


  • #475
    Gatica
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,302 ✭✭✭Gatica


    we should have a reminiscing thread to recount all the tales... one that I remember is an aunt giving out that all her kids got their hopes up about going to the nephews wedding and how heartbroken they all were that they weren't invited, etc... except it was worded more "energetically".


  • #476
    Toots
    Administrators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,992 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Toots


    Gatica wrote: »
    we should have a reminiscing thread to recount all the tales... one that I remember is an aunt giving out that all her kids got their hopes up about going to the nephews wedding and how heartbroken they all were that they weren't invited, etc... except it was worded more "energetically".
    I remember that one. IIRC she texted the bride basically telling her she was a bitch for not inviting her kids. Ah memories!


  • #477
    lazygal
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,644 ✭✭✭✭lazygal


    Sapphire wrote: »
    Some people really do lose the run of themselves in a wedding, don't they?
    I am fairly certain no one could call me a bridezilla but I do cringe at some of the stuff I worried about in the runup to my wedding. We didn't have a huge fairytale day I had dreamed about since I was a little girl, it was a mid-size fairly standard Irish wedding. And yet I was worrying about the most irrelevant crap!


  • #478
    lazygal
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,644 ✭✭✭✭lazygal


    Gatica wrote: »
    we should have a reminiscing thread to recount all the tales... one that I remember is an aunt giving out that all her kids got their hopes up about going to the nephews wedding and how heartbroken they all were that they weren't invited, etc... except it was worded more "energetically".
    There was a bride having a wedding out foreign who was giving out people weren't RSVPing to a wedding months beforehand, and they could have their holiday around her wedding so what was the problem.


  • #479
    Milly33
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,662 ✭✭✭Milly33


    Strawberry so sorry to here, i hope your dad is doing better. And dont think badly of yourself for thinking like that, you want him to be there.. Perhaps ye could have something small with your dad before the wedding itself or after.. xxx thinking of you...

    Laughing at the bridezilla stories what was the one recently where the bride and groom asked for more money in gifts tut tut.. I just have the friends of the family story which i must get to the end of one day, but one of lets say a close wedding party member all her friends got odd and her because one friend wasnt invited and that said friend after years of being their friend wont talk to them anymore, madness i never knew we were so popular


  • #480
    cactusgal
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 830 ✭✭✭cactusgal


    lazygal wrote: »
    There was a bride having a wedding out foreign who was giving out people weren't RSVPing to a wedding months beforehand, and they could have their holiday around her wedding so what was the problem.

    I remember that one! She wanted people to RSVP about 10 months ahead of time so they could plan their "hollier" around her wedding. :D


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  • #481
    Pistachios & cream
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 763 ✭✭✭Pistachios & cream


    Let's not forget the bride who didn't plan on feeding her guests and wanted the bridesmaid to pay for her own outfit and dinner. Legendary


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