The things you do when your drunk

hells angels

I was just wondering what the worst thing you can remember doin or bein told you done when you were out of your skull Drunk???

Nothing much has happened to me i dont think. other then the odd falling on my arse...But a mate of mine was in the Oasis in monaghan a while back and he was as full a two shucks and he wandered of to the jacks...that was grand till he arrived back with his lad hangin out of his jean's...i mean in full veiw of EVERYONE it was the funnist thing i ever seen. We tried tellin him that he his solider on on parade but his was to pissed to understand...then he went and fell asleep with the leg's spread and.....Well im sure you can picture the rest so i'll let you..O ya we sent him home like that and the girls got a few photo's too...

Anyway see if anyone can top that...and i want the truth not some made up bullmuck...;)

commuterised

the worst thing I can remember doing when drunk is attempting to woo a fella with my karaoke rendition of I will survive. I was so drunk I made a complete a*se of myself. I think I tried some sexy dance at the same time too. *shudder*

BLITZ_Molloy

The UL Rag Week Steel Stomach competition.

In my advanced stage of inebriation I failed to notice the camera man. Pictures of me getting sick into a dustbin were sent to every inbox on the college network.

http://pervenche1.free.fr/Page%20IRON%20STOMACH%20CONTEST0.html (guy in blue tee-shirt)

Wolf

OH boy where to start. I rekon one of the best was the time I was knocked down. Like properly like you see in the movies where the person goes over the car. I got up gave im the fingers and walk to 5 minis of my house and got a taxi home.

Woke up the next morning and tried to stand and crumpled into a heap. Knee size of a ballon.

not nice.

hells angels

cool but but kinda nausiating..

thats the sorta stuff i wanna hear keep 'em coming!!!:D

mooman_00

absolutely banannas one new years nite/st. stephens nite (im not sure which) at a mates house was found on my own outside, in front of the garage, cycling around in circles, on a bike thats the size of a small dog(belonged to his younger sister) that had two flat tyres. I was completely oblivious to everyone standing and watching me doin my thing and was most likely there for hours..........

daveg

Originally posted by hells angels
But a mate of mine was in the Oasis in monaghan a while back and he was as full a two shucks and he wandered of to the jacks...that was grand till he arrived back with his lad hangin out of his jean's...i mean in full veiw of EVERYONE it was the funnist thing i ever seen. We tried tellin him that he his solider on on parade but his was to pissed to understand...then he went and fell asleep with the leg's spread and.....Well im sure you can picture the rest so i'll let you..O ya we sent him home like that and the girls got a few photo's too...

I nealry pissed myself laughing when I read that. Top class

Nothing bad/stupid ever happened to me (that I can remember) but I could tell you a few stories about Patch69 a bottle of grants whiskey, a squad car and a raw egg

patch

I think it was my 18th birthday. 3 of us drank a bottle of grants whiskey- in shots-all gone in about twenty mins.
Next thing I remember is trying to get into a nightclub. decided to walk up town once refused. I was walking in such a state that a squad car pulled over and asked me to get in!!!!! Which I did, happily. My mates got be back out and carried me to my flat. Woke up Later, still locked, went with the lads to a party.
Couldnt understand why a girl I had been with Was just talking and nothing more...... turned out (next day) that the contents of my stomach were all down my front throughout proceedings!!!

I haven't drank whiskey since........

patch

Christ!!!!!!!!!!!! ya, that cvnt daveg was one of my so called 'mates':D

Wolf

Jump 20 foot down into the Lagan (Belfasts Liffy) in Belfast New Year 2000.

daveg

LMFAO - what are the chances !!!

but I could tell you a few stories about Patch69 a bottle of grants whiskey, a squad car and a raw egg

I think it was my 18th birthday. 3 of us drank a bottle of grants whiskey- in shots-all gone in about twenty mins.
Next thing I remember is trying to get into a nightclub. decided to walk up town once refused. I was walking in such a state that a squad car pulled over and asked me to get in!!!!! Which I did, happily. My mates got be back out and carried me to my flat. Woke up Later, still locked, went with the lads to a party.
Couldnt understand why a girl I had been with Was just talking and nothing more...... turned out (next day) that the contents of my stomach were all down my front throughout proceedings!!!

I haven't drank whiskey since........

daveg

Originally posted by patch69
Christ!!!!!!!!!!!! ya, that cvnt daveg was one of my so called 'mates':D

I couldn't believe it. The Garda says "you.ve had too much to drink son... common a night in the cells for you my boy". Pat says no problem (thinking taxi home). We had to haul him out and promise the garda we would bring him straight home to his bed.

Sev

Where does the egg come into it then?

Nemici

Had one too many ales and came out of the boozer and was waiting for a few others to follow.

Went to lean my back on a bus shelter and there was a metal panel missing, I fell straight through and my head hit the kerb and had to get 4 stitches in the noggin.

damn booze

Wolf

Needed to go to the bath room one nite. Was in bed so just sat up turned let her rip and lay back down. Big wet patch in the carpet the next morning.

Also it tike me months before I remembered that I did it and so I was wondering for ages about that wet patch.


Also really pissed at a party one night scored this girl from work that had a boy friend, then scored this girl and her boy friend was AT the party and then scored this girl and her HUSBAND was at the party. Didnt remember any of that till much later as well thought that I was with no one

patch

Originally posted by Sev
Where does the egg come into it then?

Well you see, The third guy had a great idea: ' why dont we eat some raw eggs!! -this will line our stomachs, and so stop us getting stupidly drunk!! ' .-muppet.

We were worse for doing it. Anyways, they both puked up as a result. I didn't. Hence I was totally fried whilst they retained the wits to mock me
:mad:

Wolf

LOL Idiot.

Raw eggs before drink. LOL

what were you thinking ROFL

patch

Originally posted by [-UK-]Wolf
LOL Idiot.

Raw eggs before drink. LOL

what were you thinking ROFL

Well, in my defence, we actually swallowed the eggs AFTER the whiskey....... most likely we were locked by this time!!!:o

Wolf

ROFL whisky then the eggs LOL

thats even worse.

OMG! LOL

thebomber

throw each other up against the shutters of shops.....
its fun
make a really loud noise too

ferdi

"hooking up with people you shouldnt" - a big problem
also falling down stairs, the usual

The Gopher

I fell head first out of a bus last christmas when disembarking after too much vodka-and that was at the start of the night

Too drunk to feel the pain.Unfortunately I fell out in full view of doormen and gardai and wasnt allowed into the club for about 2 1/2 hours(I hung around seeing as all my mates had went in).

UK Wolf-was it a suicide attempt?Its just I would probably get locked off my head if push came to shove and I had to end it so as not to feel pain and not have the sense to turn back.

Im a happy guy:)


But i rarely get totally twisted like that-it isnt worth how you feel the next morning,being woken up in a cold sweat after dreaming that your feet tried to eat you.Or some other freaky drunk dream you get.

banquo

one of my freinds isn't speaking to me because i got locked at about 2 in ther afternoon and clogged up TWO of his toilets with my drunken puke.

and all while i was supposed to be in school.

another time, while attending a lvc music seminar in Galway, we got LOCKED at about 4, and one of us had this GREAT idea: let's go for a jog! BUT, between the 4 of us, we could not unlock the fronbt door of the hostel.

and then one guy met some girl like 8 years his senior.
twas mad.

thedrowner

eh...drink makes my very uninhibited. and im not the inhibited when im sober. i've been told i've flashed people for drinks before.

also singing christina aguilaera songs at random strangers before having a conversation about the word peni (plural of penis) which should be used more often.

Silverfish

Originally posted by thedrowner
eh...drink makes my very uninhibited. and im not the inhibited when im sober. i've been told i've flashed people for drinks before.

also singing christina aguilaera songs at random strangers before having a conversation about the word peni (plural of penis) which should be used more often.

Hey!! I never got to participate in a penii conversation with you, Drowner lady.


Me, I just usually end up setting off the alarm in the house. Every night. Without fail.
And then forgetting I can't smoke inside the house, and setting off the fire alarm.
Sometimes, I remember something I need from my car, and set off the car alarm.

If up and awake, so is everybody else.




(Then I normally have to explain the random fat guy I've brought home, hehehe)

DerekD Goldfish

Back in the day when I was 16(makes it sound like decades ago when its only 3 years) I had a few cans of strongbow after a pats game and was completly locked after nearly choking on a chip and my mate haveing to preform the himlick manover I decided I needed to go for a piss there was a parked taxi down the lane I was drinking and you guess what happend next all over the bonnet I can only imagine what would have happend if the driver had came back.

The Sweeper

I am told I am responsible for leading a naked streak of some 10 people around a clubhouse.

I deny it completely.

Wolf

Originally posted by The Gopher
UK Wolf-was it a suicide attempt?Its just I would probably get locked off my head if push came to shove and I had to end it so as not to feel pain and not have the sense to turn back.

Are you reffering to the time I jumped into the lagan or the car. The car incident happen after 15 double blue after shocks. My mates were carring me and I just sudden went I can walk and pushed off straight out in front of a car.

The lagan was I had most of 24 foster and a bottle of after shock (over the course of a day mind you). After all it was new years 2000. I decided that someone needed to liven this sh1t up! So i said Id jump in for £20 and everyone said yeah right ill go for that........off with the boots and jacket and away we go.

Some people were annoyed with me and some thought it was funny. After I got out I managed to pull as well as get my £20. Good nite that :D:ninja:

seamus

Originally posted by thedrowner
eh...drink makes my very uninhibited. and im not the inhibited when im sober. i've been told i've flashed people for drinks before.

Originally posted by Silverfish
(Then I normally have to explain the random fat guy I've brought home, hehehe)

So, ahem, we'll be seeing you two lovely ladies at the boards beer then?

(Unless, of course, Silverfish is male, in which case you're welcome to come, but it won't make much odds to me )

Oh yeah, my drunkenness has been pretty tame, anything mad we've done I can't remember at this point. Most memorable was setting out from Shankill at 2am (on foot) and arriving in Ranelagh 5 hours later, after consuming a bottle of whiskey, a bottle of tequila and two bottle of schnapps between 3 of us. It was a Millenium eve party, so there were no taxis. We were supposed to stay the night, but the girl's dad came home and saw the damage done to his expensive house by a pack of gob****es who weren't invited, and duly fecked everyone out.

Interesting walk home.

Crucifix

I've not done anything to bad, but one time I went to take a piss, and just as I got going I heard a ****ing siren heading towards me. And once I had start I couldn't stop, and i was there trying to strangle the poor fella so I could run off. Turned out to be a fire truck, so I got to finish the job before I burst.
And one time I was staying at a friends house with a few guys, and one fella had had 8 beers, 10 shots of vodka, and 2 shots of zivinia (and he was only 16 at the time). So we helped him up to the room we were staying in, and left him there. Then when we came up to the bedroom several hours later, the bed was wet and he was asleep on the floor, wearing only the occupants little sisters jeans, with everything thrown from his bag and as much of his legs as possible in the bag, presumubly he thought it was he's sleeping bag. When we woke him, he had no ****ing idea what had happened.
That's the best of my stories, and funnily enough both urine related.

hellview

one time over at a friends and took it upon myself to get as much into me as i possibly could, dont remember a thing but a few things i was told about

I began puking into the tiolet and proceeded to give running commentery on how the puke looked and how it tasted etc

while puking i took a tiolet brush and tried cleaning the tiolet, there were no results, just a bigger mess

began copying some jackass stunts and put a muscle tenser on my ass, also stapled myself many times

for my finale before passing out from too much in me, i decleared i was a rock star and threw everything i could find all over the room and left and went asleep in a bed somewhere

when i came to i didnt remember a thing and had many people screaming at me to clean up the mess i made

Sev

Originally posted by The Gopher
But i rarely get totally twisted like that-it isnt worth how you feel the next morning,being woken up in a cold sweat after dreaming that your feet tried to eat you.Or some other freaky drunk dream you get.

That's interesting... do people find they have more peculiar, more nonsensical and less coherent dreams after a night on the piss?

It's something I've never really thought about. Surely the drink should have a similar effect on your dreaming subconscious to the clearly debilitating one it has on the wide awake conscious. Pity I rarely remember my dreams anyway.

Turner

Funniest thing was probably ata house party. I took a guys ride on lawn mower into the field next to his house. Aparently I did thousand of pounds of damage to the field. pfft said I, they should have paid me for cutting irregular shapes into the field.

Think it was a barley field.

Chief.

Doodee

hehehe where to start.....

I tend to make an ass of myself all teh time when i get pissed, done some really stupid stuff. puking all over the kitchen and toilets of a hotel, errr, waking up on walls or fields, annoy ppl so they throw cans and food at me, get into fights over the colour blue...err..
o yea, Send drunken TXT's, such a bad thing....

Samara

I don't think I've done anything too bad, although I did freak my b/f out one night by pretending to puke on passers-by and watch them leap out of the way, well, I was highly amused by it!!

hells angels

Originally posted by thebomber
throw each other up against the shutters of shops.....
its fun
make a really loud noise too

i've done that a few time's brilliant fun!!!
i've also pissed up against a hotel front door with the pigs sittin in the squd watchin me...let's just say they weren't half pleased got out gave me a big lecture and took my(false)name and address and send they'd send out a summons funny as **** then my mate came over and started fillin them with a losd of **** about the law(his was slightly intoxicated aswell) but all in all a very funny experiance....
another time i was at The Haunted gig in wealans and pulled down a shop front...with about 200+ ppl watchin me!:D

Some good one's there..keep em comin and dont be shy..

smoke

I know one guy who becomes really crazy when he's drunk. He held the flame of a lighter to his throat for about 20 seconds one night, still has the scars!

ballooba

Originally posted by [-UK-]Wolf
Some people were annoyed with me and some thought it was funny. After I got out I managed to pull as well as get my £20. Good nite that :D:ninja:

It's not big and its not clever. If you jump into a river like the Liffey, Lee, Lagan or pretty much any river deep enough not to be able to stand while drunk you will most likely end uip dead. Two students from the Institute of Education died last year while racing across the Liffey for a bet.

Two of my best friends friends from home died during the summer when they went for a early morning swim in a river in Donegal.

My cousin died in similar cicumstances in Belgium earlier this year.

On a lighter note, my funniest was coming back from Fireworks after christmas ball last year. Decided to piss on the front door of Trinity (Asmany do, or so i'm led to believe). Not to be out done, i not only pissed on the front door. I pissed on the small door in the big door.

Security guard opened the small door and I was still pissing on him. He chased me all the way up Grafton St with my lad hanging out.

ThreadKiller

I tend not to drink spirits now. I usually end up naked & people throw stuff at me. not a good experience for everyone concerned.

While on the beer if I get really drunk I turn invisable & am able to steal stuff... no it's true really. I'm totally convinced at this stage

ballooba

Threadkiller has just reminded me of a hilarious incident in Centra on Westmoreland St during the year.

We were out on the piss and went to go into Boomerangs. Boomerangs don't generally let students in at weekends or people under 21. It wasn't a big surprise when the bouncers told us to F*ck Off.

Anyway we went to the Bridge Bar for a few pints and stayed till closing. We went to Centra for a bit of grub (it was really to cause trouble). My mate decided that he wanted a bag of nappies so asked one of the other guys to create a diversion.

The other guy cool as a cucumber walks over to the fruit and veg stand and starts casually banging two coconuts together rather loudly. Both security guards come over to deal with the heinous coconut banger and my mate runs out with the bag of huggies. the security guards never even saw him.

This wasn't part of the original plan but we stuck the nappies all over our bodies, went back to Boomerangs and asked them again if why we were too young to get in.

patch

Originally posted by ballooba
Threadkiller has just reminded me of a hilarious incident in Centra on Westmoreland St during the year.

We were out on the piss and went to go into Boomerangs. Boomerangs don't generally let students in at weekends or people under 21. It wasn't a big surprise when the bouncers told us to F*ck Off.

Anyway we went to the Bridge Bar for a few pints and stayed till closing. We went to Centra for a bit of grub (it was really to cause trouble). My mate decided that he wanted a bag of nappies so asked one of the other guys to create a diversion.

The other guy cool as a cucumber walks over to the fruit and veg stand and starts casually banging two coconuts together rather loudly. Both security guards come over to deal with the heinous coconut banger and my mate runs out with the bag of huggies. the security guards never even saw him.

This wasn't part of the original plan but we stuck the nappies all over our bodies, went back to Boomerangs and asked them again if why we were too young to get in.

LOL:D

Wolf

Originally posted by ballooba
It's not big and its not clever. If you jump into a river like the Liffey, Lee, Lagan or pretty much any river deep enough not to be able to stand while drunk you will most likely end uip dead. Two students from the Institute of Education died last year while racing across the Liffey for a bet.

Two of my best friends friends from home died during the summer when they went for a early morning swim in a river in Donegal.

My cousin died in similar cicumstances in Belgium earlier this year.

First off im sorry for your loss and my thoughts are with you your friends, but......

I realise that it not the brighthest thing in the world to do after all im a fully trained life guard and wouldnt like others to do it. But I do things like this all the time and as long as im only risking my own life it my own choice and I get a kick out of it so.......

Also headge jumping what fun that is. Tho this one time I ran fully tilt at the headge and WHAM! I hit the concreate wall behind the thin heage. Quiet funnly peeled off got about 5 steps away wheeled on one heel and felt flat on my back.

ballooba

That post wasn't really meant to be a rant at you, just in case anyone read the post and thought that it would be really funny to jump into the Liffey on the way home some night.

Hedge jumping I do think is funny though. Especially when people hit walls.

azezil

oh the usual - titanic re-enactments, striping, sleeping with men....

thedrowner

Originally posted by ballooba

This wasn't part of the original plan but we stuck the nappies all over our bodies, went back to Boomerangs and asked them again if why we were too young to get in.

brilliant!

just reminded me of something i did when i was younger ( about 6!!!!)i went into the bathroom, invaded the press and found my mam's sanitry towels. then i stuck them all over my wall thinking they were some sort of 3-d sticker

my friend was worse tho. she put them in her shoes when she was 12 (and therefore knew what they were) to make them more comfy!!!!


oh and seamus...when is the baords beer on?

Sangre

Not to long ago I was in town on Feb 15th, the Saturday after Valentine's day. We couldn't get in anywhere except a few pubs, so eventually after consuming quite a fair bit of alcohol we returned to a friend's free gaff.
At this free gaff I appearentely drank a hell of a lot more, I was force fed alcohol for ppl's amusements. At one stage I got a bowl and filled it with alcohol and tried to force his dog to drink it, then I proceeded to show the dog how to drink it from the bowl.
Then upstairs whil playing some pool I suddenly proclaimed 'Dont you hate pants' to a room of college birds . I then proceeded to take off my pants. Afterawhile I then again proclaim 'Now my shirt is chaffing me ' And took my shirt off.
Thinking this was funny my friend took my pants and threw them out the 2nd floor window 'in a fit of passion claiming I would never need them again'.

Didnt find them until the morning. Not to wild but its the most recent event.

uberwolf

couldn't make it to jacks one night when i got home, so puked out window on to roof, birds eating my puke woke me in the morning.

Caesar_Bojangle

My mates usually smack the shiite out of one another and recreate anything they have seen on Jackass/dirty sanchez. A few weeks back, a mate stapled his sack after watching it on dirty sanchez. Good god was he in some pain afterwards, he was lucky he didnt rupture one of the actual testes.

Bicky

dont remember doing it but i burned a smiley face like this one on my arm with a fag. will be a hard one to explain to my future kids.

One night in dublin when i was 17 me and a friend got thrown out of the palace nightclub for fighting. The others started it for no reason and we got thrown out cos we beat them up.
Anyway i was living on the north circular road at the time and we were walking up oconnell street on the way home. At the junction of parnell and oconnell there is a cab company called ballymun cabs.
Me and my mate were still hyped up on young male testosterone and my friend was goin on about how he hit this one guy a soild box and all the while taking it out on the air with massive swings.
walking along he seen a supermacs drinking cup perching perfectly on one of those 3 or 4 foot high black metal bollards that stop people parking there and hit it a slap knocking it high into the sky and drowning the queue waiting outside ballymun cabs. i remember looking into my friends eyes and seeing the fear hit him like a brick as he realised that not only were we not the hard men we thought, but we were in fact about as tough as a five year old girl. A group of big brutes turned on us and chased us all the way to the temple nightclub.
**** mister motivator. want to lose weight? then i suggest you do this two nights a week and you will learn to run like a cheeta

Silverfish

Originally posted by seamus
So, ahem, we'll be seeing you two lovely ladies at the boards beer then?

(Unless, of course, Silverfish is male, in which case you're welcome to come, but it won't make much odds to me )

............there WILL be beer, won't there? Where and when??
So I'll actually have messageboard witnesses to my drunken random-fat-guy chatting up and bringing home thereof.



( Yes, yes, I'm female. Officially and for the record.)

Duffman

Singing Monty Python's "Every Sperm is Sacred" at the top of your voice in Donnybrook village gets amusing reactions from frightened punters...


Also dancing through the streets of Turin at 3am with a viola singing Irish folk songs while handing out letters from Romano Prodi at the same time to random and terrified Italians...


Hrm... also tearing down election posters, have debates with them at the kitchen table then putting them in bed beside sleeping m8s....

Also had a heated argument recently about the validity of the statement "roundabouts: striaghtforward when you know how.."