The humblebragging dishonesty of LinkedIn

"I may be a millionaire but work isn't everything - it's the little things that matter".

brownbinman

The "The State of Linkedin" on twitter is all you need

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117973809#Comment_117973809

It's amazing - thank you!

Already two tweets about men there commenting on boobs.

retalivity

Linkedin has turned into a cesspit. Endless HR people and Recruiters posting nonsense like its Facebook, Companies posting content to show how in touch they are, people with 'I would like to announce.....' and then thanking 50 people like its the Oscars.

Used to be great for finding work, maybe it still is once you wade past all the rubbish.

AustinLostin

This is stolen from twitter but:

𝗜𝗻𝗳𝗹𝘂𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝗼𝗻 𝗟𝗶𝗻𝗸𝗲𝗱𝗜𝗻 𝗯𝗲 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲:

One day, I was on my way to an interview.

On my way, I saw a stray dog.

It looked hungry and tired.

Most people ignored it.

But I didn't. I opened my lunchbox and gave it my lunch.

While feeding the dog, I got late and missed my interview.

I went home disappointed.

Next day I got a call from the same company asking me to appear for the interview.

I was surprised, but I went anyway.

I was asked by an employee to wait in the CEO's cabin.

5 minutes later, The CEO walked in.

It was the dog from the previous day, in a classy suit.

It barked lovingly, wagged its tail and gave me my appointment letter.

My eyes welled up.

Guys, that day I realised that you should never shy away from doing good.

Because Karma could be a dog as well.

#linkedinstories #mondaymotivation # #motivationalstory

"Omg so true love it!"

Marketing managers writing like teenage girls.

Cyrus

between that and the endless virtue signalling it has gone badly downhill.

these new this little girl stories are a low light as well.

StupidLikeAFox

My boss offered me 10k to jump out of a plane. All my colleagues said no, but I asked for more information. The plane had no engine and I only had to jump 3 feet to the ground. My boss gave me 10k and promoted me to CEO because I was the only one who fully assessed the situation.

- I actually read something along these lines a while ago. **** right off lads

Just get a job in the public service and forget about all that finding a new job nonsense, and the absolute delusions involved in ‘planning my career’.

Sky King

Here's a picture of my daughter. When she was one she was diagnosed with galloping leprosy, and all her limbs fell off. Today she completed her first marathon. I couldn't be prouder. #prouddad #inspiration #nevergiveup

My uncle never learned to read or write and was the janitor of the local train station for 40 years. One day just after scooping a turd out of the urinal he held a door open for a man. The man was impressed with his manners and told him they could use someone like him at the office. It tuns out the man was Bill Gates and my uncle is now in charge of 500 bathrooms in of his own skyscraper #inspiration #politenesspaysoff

Here's a picture of an old person overcoming some kind of difficulty. Be nice to old people. I have totally missed the irony that i am using this picture purely as a way of harvesting likes.

Here's a photo of me completing something, which in the grand scheme of things is actually fairly pedestrian. I believe i am the only person on the Internet who has ever faced any kind of adversity, and I also have some unspecified mental health issue which I allude to when it suits me, so I'm leveraging all this to make my lame achievements seem exceptional. I'm flattered by all your likes and comments, keep them coming in.

Delighted and Honoured to have been nominated as runner up in the Longford/Leitrim region for The Radiator Awards 2021. Winning a Radiator Award has been a dream of mine since I was a little girl.

Here's yet another picture of our staff with the ethnic minority ones front and centre. They seem aware they are being used but don't seem to mind too much. Anyway look how progressive we are. #blacklivesmatter

Hi I'm a business coach and somehow, despite not having any qualifications or experience in your field I believe I am better at your job than you are, and can show you how to be more like me. Id like to connect. You can read my copy and paste inspirational comments on your feed every time you log in.

Since I was 2 years old I had a passion for the bearings they use in slurry agitators. I've just watched the first unit in the production line roll off my very own slurry agitator bearing company. Couldn't be prouder. #followyourdreams

I hate it.

thomasm

Everyone on Linkedin is always delighted; 'delighted to announce' , 'delighted to share' , 'delighted to have passed a course in how to be delighted', 'delighted to blah blah blah.

Sky King

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117973962#Comment_117973962

"Delighted to be retiring so I don't have so subject myself o this fking corporate circle jerk any longer. Later, d1ckheads"

I'll enjoy posting that when the time comes.

Sonics2k

I swear just a few weeks ago I saw one of those "Here's an inspiring story about how I hired some homeless bloke with no fingers and now he's my top guy" that was copy+pasted by like 5 different people.

On the plus side if you click on the comments you start to see more and more people calling it out as bullshit.

cml387

The guy "working from hospital" beside his post natal wife has got to be a send up.

Something I've noticed more is people posting the achievements of sports stars for reactions. Saw a few people posting Ronaldo when their job is the likes of an in-house recruiter for a financial institution or an auditor!

Another big one is posting overly intimate details about their personal lives, something I saw a while ago was like "This is my wife, we were about to divorce but decided to go on one last date, and rekindled our romance etc etc" - Nice sentiment but definitely not something that should be put up there and if I was a hiring manager I'd be a bit weirded out by those who either spam or overshare.

Alicano

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117973956#Comment_117973956

Round of applause!. The runner up in Longford/leitrim region awards got me 🤣

I'm on Linkedin. I genuinely would love to figure out how to change careers or get more pay. But all I get is fellow work colleagues looking to connect. WTF? Just call me or walk over to my desk. we have nothing to offer each other! 😂

Strumms

Is LinkedIn relevant these days ? Was it ever even ? I’d be inclined to believe very little I’d read on there, mostly just PR BS... if you are an employer just get their cv and letter, do some research as in they ain’t made the news for kidknapping goats in Strabane, invite for interviews, verify references, gauge their suitability by questioning them and make up your mind if you wanna hire them...

Cdemess

I met someone who was the ‘Office Champion’. I didn’t bother ask him what he did.

el Fenomeno

Hi, I'm just out of college with an Arts degree. I can't find any actual work, but I got this job in recruitment to fill the void in between sessions in Ayia Napa with the girls. Did you see my new sepia headshot for my profile picture? Anyway, I have a job spec that has a few random words in common with your LinkedIn profile. I think you're totes a good fit for it. How about you put your carefully crafted and hard-earned 25 year career in my hands? I could really do with the commish.

Kind regards,

Lindsey.

It's always Lindsey.

JupiterKid

I’ve used LinkedIn for a few years and whilst it does have its uses - networking to a certain extent (although from experience networking is best done at seminars, conferences etc. where you actually get to physically meet others) and getting notifications on upcoming seminars, events etc that may be of interest - there is also a lot of absolute rubbish posted up there.

I also find it pretty annoying that if I don’t check up on my LinkedIn every day, there are about 53 notifications waiting for me to read, 95% of them spammy rubbish. Like the others opined, lots of virtue signaling nonsense to show that “we care.”

Also “congratulating” others in your network on their work anniversaries. Like WTF is that about? 🤨🤔

is_that_so

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117973962#Comment_117973962

So that's what I'm doing wrong! I'm rarely more than pleased!

silliussoddius

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117974216#Comment_117974216

What a loser. That’s nowhere close to being a rockstar.

retalivity

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117974384#Comment_117974384

Pfffftt.... Rockstars are so last year. Need to be a Ninja now, preferably one with 'A black belt in talent sourcing'

Cyrus

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117974602#Comment_117974602

if you dont use a scooter in your office to get around are you even living?

Sky King

They could save a lot of confusion by replacing a lot of vague self appointed titles such as 'Serial Entrepreneur' & 'Thought Leader' with "Tosser".

Also, anybody who calls themselves a CEO of a company that doesn't have a couple of hundred people working for it and a turnover in the millions is a fkin eejit.

Linkedin is a bit nonsensical, however not getting with the program is equally nonsensical.

For example, say a small company was being considered for a contract the boss MD or whatever is annoyed with having to have a LinkedIn profile but wast kinda cornered into it because of modern life, so they writhe nonsense i.e their profile says they got their construction economics degree from the Sorbonne or other such nonsense. That is very telling about the kind of company it is.

Earthhorse

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058211600/the-humblebragging-dishonesty-of-linkedin

Is this your way of humblebragging that you are friends with millionaires on LinkedIn?

castletownman

It's the virtual equivalent of that one fella you see at a party who can't help but brag about how successful he is, even if the conversation begins down a completely different avenue.

Was at one recently where I was sort of flitting between a few conversations as I was leaving early, and there was one lad who no matter who he was chatting to I could overhear him say "oh yeah I started a Masters this week....."

Fair play, but not everyone cares.

Bombaby1974

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117974218#Comment_117974218

Oh and by the way, that role that I think you'd be a perfect fit for, pays 20 grand less than your current role.

So will I set up an interview?

Eh, no Lindsay, yer grand thanks.

YFlyer

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117975075#Comment_117975075

American companies don't like the whole Rubberbandit type of humour. They want to change Ireland but ignore the US.

I can only imagine that it's a couple of percent of users who go in for all that nonsense. I got a job through it pretty quickly last year along with a whole bunch of other new starters since. The only people posting that kind of shite are the ones who make a living from such nonsense.

lostinsuperfunk

This is worth a read: https://theoutline.com/post/5495/how-to-beat-linked-in-the-game

[quote]Work your way through the corporate food chain like an intestinal parasite at a gratis conference buffet.

[/quote]

Some millionaire: "the best thing you can offer your employees is that you care".

This sh1t isn't even an exaggeration.

Ash.J.Williams

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117973826#Comment_117973826

always capture your rolex and high end car keys in your photos of stuff :)

maestroamado

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058211600/the-humblebragging-dishonesty-of-linkedin

"money isn't everything... its the only thing"

Munstergirl854

Steven Bartlett and the gymshark family come to mind in this one...

I dont think it ever really took off here on a large scale compared to the UK but it suits them because they're full of **** anyway.

It is the home of toxic positivity.

Smash your goals,smash your day..I just bought my house at 24 hows your Monday?

Oh **** off Lucy.

JimmyVik

Reading a guy I work withs linkedin you would think he has turned down offers from NASA and also cured cancer in his previous jobs

They are looking for a way to get rid of him where i work. Totally useless.

Oh yeah I saw a post from a woman letting people know she bought her first house at 23. In St. Alban's, one of the most affluent areas in the entire country. I mean, she obviously got help - nothing wrong with that, I got help - but don't boast about it on LinkedIn and pretend it's a career achievement accomplished alone.

Salvadoor

Got my current job through LinkedIn so it does do the basics right

It's great to continually see my old job being reposted approximately every 4 months as that toxic $h!thole with incompetent managers tries to retain staff. The job spec for it is a heap of lies and full of BS: "come work on a great team", "fast-paced environment", "cutting-edge"

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117978702#Comment_117978702

In fairness that lad Steve Bartlett has done very well for himself, but I remember him making one of those "you don't have to go to college" proclamations. It's true that you don't always have to, and I agree there can be an unnecessary emphasis on it in some contexts. But ffs of course you have to go to college for numerous careers. And some employers will expect a third level qualification.

He was being really dismissive of college, and running down a massive group of people (of course his lackeys - college educated natch - were falling over themselves to praise him) and it seemed like he just resented not experiencing college himself. Then a guy pointed out "here in Africa you do, it's a minimal requirement no matter what" - to which Steve replied "Oh I'm not having a go at Africa - Africa is an amazing country". Africa - "country".

AckwelFoley

Linkedin is the social media platform where you can make your dick 2 foot long and then suck it yourself while wearing a suit you last wore to a wedding in 2018 that doesn't fit you anymore

Kermit.de.frog

Linkedin moved some years a go from what it was good for and meant to be. Strictly it was a CV online. Which was great.

Then they decided to go down the social media cesspit and now it's just like any other social media site which in my experience seems to have turned a lot people away. It still is kinda different in a way but it's much of a muchness.

Most people I know don't seem to use it as much, if at all.

As for the endorsements, they are just glorified likes now.

StupidLikeAFox

I did laugh at the brazen cringe of this one tbf to him

Donald Trump

"I am humbled to have received my first class degree in **** from no-name-IT. Here is a photograph of the certificate to show how humbled I am"

Would ya ever **** off.

Donald Trump

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117974056#Comment_117974056

He was just posting on boards.ie. His next post is right below this one

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117976527#Comment_117976527

Management “consultants” , life coaches, self employed trainers- it’s a little merry go round for them- it makes them look “relevant” - all their doing is churning spam

Kermit.de.frog

Is "Life Coach" another way of saying unemployed? I love how these "career" terms have taken off in the last 10 years.

AckwelFoley

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117983429#Comment_117983429

I know 2 of these guys..

Absolute wankstains. Pure spoofers. One was about to engage in a multi million euro take over of a business. The guy hasn't a pot to piss in.

Another guy is a life coach and motivational speaker and sells what ever the next bollocks of a fad is, be it water that will make you healthier or juice plus. Again..not a single pot to piss in. He's got good hair though

mistersifter

There's one insufferable fúçker who works in a university. Recently posted an entire email from a student who had thanked him for his help, under the pretence that he was congratulating the student after she graduated.

It was probably a complete breach of privacy to post the email. He's bloody awful at his job too and his LinkedIn posts are terribly written. Another of his ridiculously long posts was boasting about his father who "established lots of really successful companies" and helped poor people to get into college. Shocking lack of self awareness.

Lack of self awareness is exactly it. Look at this shyte from someone who makes a living from social media. And the utter state of the comments - "omg so thought provoking!"

road_high

Thought it was just me but the last few years in particular it is just endless American psycho babble. Also a seemingly endless parade of new graduates telling us how thrilled and proud they all are to achieved their 2.2 degree from Tralee IT and how marvellous it all has been…in 2007 I graduated from a masters and didn’t even go to the graduation. And there was certainly no big announcements on non existent social media. Maybe I’m just old fashioned now, probably! But modesty to me was and still a strong virtue. Maybe there’s just no place for that anymore where things are more cut throat than ever