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I've never bought condoms

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  • 03-07-2021 4:37pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 2,639 ✭✭✭


    Is it really awkward or what? Do you ask the store assistants for advice on what condoms to buy or how does it work?


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Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 3,683 ✭✭✭Signore Fancy Pants


    You must be buying them for someone else.

    Don't worry your little head about it.


  • Registered Users Posts: 13,885 ✭✭✭✭Thelonious Monk


    Can't say I'm surprised


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Is it really awkward or what? Do you ask the store assistants for advice on what condoms to buy or how does it work?

    Just buy them on Amazon


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,793 ✭✭✭Hijpo


    Is it really awkward or what? Do you ask the store assistants for advice on what condoms to buy or how does it work?

    Buy four boxes of condoms (various varieties) three containers of lube and two bath towels.
    The other people will feel so awkward the awkwardness of buying condoms wont be an issue for you.


  • Registered Users Posts: 270 ✭✭beerguts


    Condoms! Just get the lad to pull out of ya before he is done. Don't worry about STDs, just keep shouting 'No homo' while riding and that will prevent the cock rot


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  • Registered Users Posts: 242 ✭✭berocca2016


    Is it really awkward or what? Do you ask the store assistants for advice on what condoms to buy or how does it work?

    Go into a pharmacy, there'll be no qualms if you have any question.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,515 ✭✭✭Buddy Bubs


    The young one behind the counter will teach you how to put one on. Just ask


  • Registered Users Posts: 717 ✭✭✭limericklad87


    Bring them to the counter and ask where the fitting room is and do they have 30 day money back guarantee


  • Registered Users Posts: 293 ✭✭Fils


    Try one on in the pharmacy first, boots offer a fitting service.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,452 ✭✭✭gogo


    You just have to walk discretely to the counter and slap it out, they take a quick look and will tell you what you need fairly quickly.
    Don’t put it up on the counter or anything, they don’t seem to like that.. just hold it on your hand and wave it a bit so they can see …


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  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Is it really awkward or what? Do you ask the store assistants for advice on what condoms to buy or how does it work?

    You try them on in the shop.


  • Registered Users Posts: 12,564 ✭✭✭✭whiskeyman


    You have to book a sizing consultation first.
    Any shops will take a booking.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,221 ✭✭✭TheDavester


    somebodies telling us about being a virgin


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,452 ✭✭✭gogo


    somebodies telling us about being a virgin

    Maybe he has 10 kids.. and doesn’t want anymore?


  • Posts: 13,712 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    OP if you heard some of the things that pharmacists hear on a daily basis, you wouldn't be worried.
    Someone in our friend group works as a locum pharmacist, she's seen some shit, literally. They get all sorts, like fellas coming in with their willies wrapped in tissue paper, oozing some kind of putrid discharge, asking for help. I'm still barred from that place.

    It's just a box of condoms, do a bit of googling on brands. The pharmacist isn't remotely interested.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,498 ✭✭✭Pauliedragon


    Has Mr Feg made a cum back? Just buy some rubbers op the 1st packet you find. They all work just fine.


  • Registered Users Posts: 13,036 ✭✭✭✭Purple Mountain


    Ask the woman behind the counter to show you where the XL sizes are.

    To thine own self be true



  • Registered Users Posts: 2,639 ✭✭✭completedit


    OP if you heard some of the things that pharmacists hear on a daily basis, you wouldn't be worried.
    Someone in our friend group works as a locum pharmacist, she's seen some shit, literally. They get all sorts, like fellas coming in with their willies wrapped in tissue paper, oozing some kind of putrid discharge, asking for help. I'm still barred from that place.

    It's just a box of condoms, do a bit of googling on brands. The pharmacist isn't remotely interested.

    I look like a 'bro' but if that the personality of Mark Corrigan from Peep Show. Things like this are awkward for me.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,753 ✭✭✭NewbridgeIR


    You can buy condoms in Dunnes and Tesco. Just get them there with your grocery shopping.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,639 ✭✭✭completedit


    Ask the woman behind the counter to show you where the XL sizes are.

    Mantis Toboggan


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,034 ✭✭✭Swaine


    Buy them in Tesco and use self service checkout. No need to interact with anyone.

    Enjoy your posh ****.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,081 ✭✭✭theguzman


    Crisp packets for the win


  • Posts: 13,712 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    I look like a 'bro' but if that the personality of Mark Corrigan from Peep Show. Things like this are awkward for me.
    Just explain to the pharmacist that you're a bro, show him all the women on your insta., etc to prove that you're not just after a posh ****. Awkwardness averted.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,275 ✭✭✭km991148


    Next time you are in for a haircut just ask for something for the weekend.

    Oh wait I just realised - its 2021 not the 1960s..


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,189 ✭✭✭Ubbquittious


    I went to a shop once and asked for a pack of johnnies. Girlie behind the counter asked me if they were cigarettes

    Another time in UK an Indian lad behind the counter looked at me confused , paused for a whlie and then said "jiggy jiggy!"


  • Registered Users Posts: 13,036 ✭✭✭✭Purple Mountain


    theguzman wrote: »
    Crisp packets for the win

    Except if they're Monster Munch.

    To thine own self be true



  • Registered Users Posts: 23,842 ✭✭✭✭Larbre34


    Buy them in Tesco or Boots with the self checkout, bish bash bosh, home to stir her tea!


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,575 ✭✭✭monkeysnapper


    I remember as a young man of that age .... my mother would go into the local boozer on a Saturday afternoon so I planned on calling in just to say hi after working my Saturday job .... it was just a ploy to go into toilets to get my wrappers .... God I was so nervous...watching to door and bar to see if there was anyone in toilets....

    Like a military exercise I nearly knocked the bloody door in going in .... 1 pound coin at the ready.... .... prize in hand .... mission accomplished!!!!

    Only stupid me left the dam things in my ars pocket and my mum washed my work pants and they came out in wash ...

    Op.... just go to chemist ....

    Oh .... and girl dumped me shortly after so didn't need them anyway.... ��


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,452 ✭✭✭gogo


    I went to a shop once and asked for a pack of johnnies. Girlie behind the counter asked me if they cigarettes "

    This could of been me…. First year in college, working part time in a shop and a lad asked for johnnies, straight up from the country and thinking I was down with the lingo in Dublin, I got him 20 John Player Blue .. he rolled his eyes and said johnnies again, and I went back and got him 10 John player blue, him grumbling for ffs under his breath.. back and forth it went … until he roared at me that I was a f’in eejit.. ….. he was right to be fair


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  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    Hijpo wrote: »
    Buy four boxes of condoms (various varieties) three containers of lube and two bath towels.
    The other people will feel so awkward the awkwardness of buying condoms wont be an issue for you.

    Or even better, buy a 4 pack with a "happy birthday mum" card.


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