What's the etiquette here??

Arthur Pants

Should have picked it up and brought it home with you.

Heard that the top brass in Croke Park have decided to initiate their Project Brown business continuity plan to deal with the potential situation in the shítters in HQ tomorrow and Sunday. Tens of thousands of Galway, Clare, and Limerick supporters arriving full of warm beer and Supermacs looking to "offload the lunch" before the games. Could get messy. They've been in touch with the team down in Ringsend.

Completely different scenario to last weekend where it was the Gardaí who were on alert to deal with all the jackeens and Nordies hanging around Drumcondra.

You the man

Down in the canaries at the moment on 'important company business' . The weather is magical but the local fayre is play a wreck with me insides. Think I need a few pints of mediocre Guinness to clear out the dirty water..

Happened upon an older establishment last evening that required the Jax roll to be disposed in the bin- we all know the reasons why. Couldn't bring myself to do it tho, as the wasps and bluebottles would invade within minutes...

Brendan Bendar

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120857981#Comment_120857981

Fair auld ‘bang’ off the bin there I’d guess..

Nothing worse than a choritzo shïte Man, was in a local place in Alicante once and they had the bin system, fcuking whack when I opened the door nearly tumbled me.

Saved mesel the trouble and sent a load of arse mince directly into the bin, well, most of it anyway.

Left rapidly….

Brought the dog for a walk in St Anne’s this evening after the dinner. Had an extremely spicy chilli con Carne before I headed out. Was down near the Red Stables when I got a sudden and violent cramp “down yonder”.

Was going to head into the trees beside the Rose Garden when all of a sudden I spotted two portaloos near the Red Stables. Bounded down to them and into the first portaloo. Straight out a second later. Into the second, which wasn’t much better but didn’t have a load of “pottery batter” splashed all around the unit.

Perch job and warm toilet paper. Not great but better than a hover and dock leaves job.

Slideways

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120864340#Comment_120864340

Where was the hound while you were dropping a weight division.

Hope the poor fućker didn’t have to come into the stall with you!

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120864473#Comment_120864473

She was grand outside - they have a water bowl for the dogs just at the entrance to the cafe there for those who know the area. I emerged to finding her sniffing the crotch of one of those labradoodles.

If I wasn’t a happily married man then I would definitely have been up for doing something similar with her hot milf owner.

cj maxx

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120857981#Comment_120857981

That reminds me of working in NYC with Mexican fellas . They always put the soiled bog roll in the bin and not flushed

the bang of the place in the hot summers was awful

mfceiling

https://twitter.com/fesshole/status/1681082617376956416?t=K5YBNCPPgvY_WmpSk5ERwg&s=19

Brendan Bendar

Required items

Cardboard about one foot by six inches

One electric egg whisk

Eye protection goggles(optional)

Method

cut hole in cardboard enough to accommodate egg whisk blades and reach the ‘load’.

place cardboard ‘template ‘ into pan

insert egg whisk into template hole and ensure robust contact with the load.

Apply eye protection goggles (optional)

Engage the egg whisk at full power for 45 seconds until the load resistance had turned to mulch.

Remove the egg whisk and cardboard template, survey the viscosity ‘slop index’ of the load.

Engage flush.

Insert egg whisk into dishwasher at the ‘two saucepans 70 degree setting’ .

When cycle complete Return the egg whisk to the instrument bay ready for the next savory omlette as required.

Job done, load gone, no panic.

padd b1975

I don't really have a problem with multiculturalism, but a line has to be drawn with bins becoming a recognised part of cleanup.

FFS...

You the man

Don't think tis the culture this time Pad.

It's the prehistoric sh1tters that ain't up to the job.

Just called into the local for a few sociables after work. Decided I’d make room for the dinner. Some absolute mutant had left cubicle 1 in an awful state. A pong that would floor a Bangladeshi sewage inspector, the bowl left like a F1 pit lane, and a dead otter half submerged in the water.

I presume it’s one of the all-day barstool and bookies crew. Subhuman.

Grouptherapy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120876350#Comment_120876350

Encountered this situation in Brazil some years ago. The bang from the bin was horrendous. Even the Bluebottles were coughing.

Link below might be of use to anyone traveling in the near future. There should probably be a sticky on this thread for references like this actually. Maybe some Mod will pick it up...

https://brilliantmaps.com/flush-toilet-paper/

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120890472#Comment_120890472

Can’t sticky posts in a thread btw

Gremlinertia

Appropriate use of sticky though to be fair..

. .

Utter Consternation

The wife walked in on me taking a nasty sh1te the other day in the jacks under the stairs. Fairly fcuking foul by all standards, and smell was very concentrated due to the small size of the WC.

She's going around with nose PTSD after it. Has the 10,000 yard stare and all. She's not herself since. I'd be open to any advice from anyone with similar experience as to how to get her out of this funk.

A steak dinner, then up to the bedroom, stick on Aerosmith, and make sweet passionate love to her for 8-10 minutes?

mfceiling

Put a lock on the door?

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120897923#Comment_120897923

I’d say a dominos would do in fairness, no cleanup needed either.

Floppybits

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120891260#Comment_120891260

Nothing worse than that happening.

You the man

Ah here, this has to breach all etiquette that is upheld here..

Or does it?

Animals...

Brendan Bendar

Absolutely…and no cistern on show that one could ‘top deck’ after getting a bad pint or encountering surly bar staff.

Not cricket lads…. Not cricket…

new pub with weird toilets.. deck sake

imagine the amount of drink fuelled embarrassment and shame that place is going to fuel now

then there’s the toilets

Brendan Bendar

Very strange, very strange….

Id be very nervous in there, like,could some wide load pop in after a day gannetting down the pints between trots to the ‘bewkies’ and Just say “Howya bud” then back up to the pot next to you and blow out an arsefull of ripe gut mulch with a ‘whang’ off it that would lift tiles off a wall.

”Sorry about that Bud, had a win on the nags , that red wine has me guts in flitters , give her a flush when she settles, I have a big bet on the dogs in Catford in two minutes”

Door slams…

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120911655#Comment_120911655

It’s exactly the type of animal you invite into your life with these sorts of notions Brendan.

Brendan Bendar

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/120911755#Comment_120911755

Exactly Mr.R. A nice quiet area to sit down and discharge a lumpy load of solid midden seems to be too much to expect these days.

Some fcukkers have no breeding at all, there was a lad down at the club, and he had others very similar, who took to the shïtters before a round and the kernt always left the door open!!

You could rush in for a quick wizz before teeing off and next thing there would be a blast of wet air, then the pace car and then the full field crashing into the first corner.

You’d look around and there would be our man, scuns around the ankles, usually well bronzed and not a bother on him.

We can’t accept these tandem shïtters….no way.

Sounds like one of those golf clubs “up past the airport”, Brendan. Taxi plates in the car park, and lads with prison tattoos hoovering back 4.50 pints of Carling in the bar while shîttin’ on about Rory not having the complete mental game these days.

The Captain’s Prize being a complete driveway power wash. Shower of scobies.

Jacksie T Malone

Are the jacks unisex at least? Maybe couples could take dumps together. Have a competition, see who can leave their toilet in the worst condition.