Tinder weight filter

Wibbs

LOUD NOISES!! Well the big difference is someone who is fat can with effort lose the weight. In theory. Depends how big and how long they're that size for and how much mad willpower they have going on. Even then people, men and women tend to slowly put the weight back on. Take stomach bypass surgery. Massive loss of weight very rapidly, but after a few years the majority regain weight and many creep back up to the weight they were.

As for mental torment? The "lose the lard lassie" stuff is everywhere. Thin is in and women in general are much more aware of and advertised to about their weight. Many women are on near lifetime "diets" and eating disorders are far more common in women and anorexia has the highest death rate of any mental illness, so yeah a fair amount of "mental torment" going on.

Small mickey? Yeah, not great and like being short there's feck all you can do about it(maybe mickey transplants that work will come along in the future?). Depends how small I suppose. If it's the size of a thumb you're kinda boned. Or not. Four inches in old money isn't too great, but more to work with, different positions, more foreplay and the like(good bet anyway. Plus gay women on average get off more than straight and no willies in sight). And yes for some, if not a fair number of women "size does matter", at least within a normal range(average/normal is within 5-6 inches IIRC?). Put it another way a woman won't stay if the relationship is crap even if you're hung like a shire horse. I'd reckon mickey size is more for the owners benefit. Internal bragging rights type of thing. A feeling of masculinity if you're packing more than the average bear. Apparently some men are worried about small bits and bobs in a gym changing room type environment. Which has nada to do with women.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

Who cares what someone else finds attractive?
Nobody should be made feel bad cause they don’t fancy a fat girl no more than a girl should be made feel bad about not liking short guys it’s all subjective and nobody is wrong

completedit

Amaris Tasteless Smallpox wrote: »

Who cares what someone else finds attractive?
Nobody should be made feel bad cause they don’t fancy a fat girl no more than a girl should be made feel bad about not liking short guys it’s all subjective and nobody is wrong

It's wrong if you're on the wrong side of both. It's an absolutely brutal life let me assure you. I don't think people know what it's like, I explained elsewhere on here, when you're a short guy you don't even figure in the race, girls just don't think of you as dominant or sexual unless your handsome enough that you can compensate for your height. As I explained as well, most guys are average but if you have a bit of height and a bit of a big frame, you will have a chance with girls.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

completedit wrote: »

It's wrong if you're on the wrong side of both. It's an absolutely brutal life let me assure you. I don't think people know what it's like, I explained elsewhere on here, when you're a short guy you don't even figure in the race, girls just don't think of you as dominant or sexual unless your handsome enough that you can compensate for your height. As I explained as well, most guys are average but if you have a bit of height and a bit of a big frame, you will have a chance with girls.

But that’s the individual persons issue, that’s not girls being vain bitches. I know a few short chubby lads in relationships so obviously some people find it attractive. But that’s not the point. Some people aren’t attracted to fat people, some people will be. It’s all okay. Nobody has a moral duty to find someone else attractive. It sucks if you draw the short straw but ultimately that isn’t anyone else’s fault

completedit

It definitely is tbf. And it's not all okay, how the **** can it be all okay? Tell that to people who cry at home and want to ****ing step out on front of a train because they've been rejected outright and humiliated because of their dick size.:mad::mad::mad::mad:

One eyed Jack

completedit wrote: »

THERE IS NO NO NO SIMILARITY BETWEEN A FAT GIRL AND A GUY WITH A SMALL DICK. NONE. NONE. NONE. The mental torment that comes with a small dick is much more than a girl who is fat.

If there really is no similarity in your mind between the two, then how can you possibly compare them, let alone say one is any worse than the other in and of itself?

Insecurity about oneself no matter what it is can be utterly debilitating, or one can be indifferent to it, depends entirely on the individual.

Gimme A Pound

completedit wrote: »

It definitely is tbf. And it's not all okay, how the **** can it be all okay? Tell that to people who cry at home and want to ****ing step out on front of a train because they've been rejected outright and humiliated because of their dick size.:mad::mad::mad::mad:

It very much IS ok for a person not to be attracted to someone. It's not voluntary - they cannot help how they feel so it's unreasonable to view it as a choice.

It's appalling to belittle someone for a physical trait though - that's different.

bloodless_coup

I think a couple of lads in this thread have small lads.

Hammer89

doylefe wrote: »

I think a couple of lads in this thread have small lads.

I used to, before I lost a good bit of weight, and greatly reduced the fat mass around my pubes, revealing more of it. Now it's like a roll of bin bags, but not as black

completedit

I'm 9 per cent bf so I'm not some typical hippo. I think that shows how small I am tbh because averages take into account fatties who if they lost weight would gain a few inches. The kind of girls I know aren't getting with fat guys so I imagine the average they've experienced is like 6 inches or so.

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts

Amaris Tasteless Smallpox wrote: »

Who cares what someone else finds attractive?
Nobody should be made feel bad cause they don’t fancy a fat girl no more than a girl should be made feel bad about not liking short guys it’s all subjective and nobody is wrong

As well, I don’t get people saying that it’s not okay to prefer tall guys because shortness is something that can't be helped, the subtext being “it’s not fair”. Life’s not fair! Should I be upset that a beautiful woman gets more male attention than me? I’ve heard people say in response to that “you can have plastic surgery!”. Yeah, most people can’t afford that or don’t want unnecessary surgery and the results are far from certain so realistically, most people have to accept that the beautiful people will more attention. Likewise, a short guy has to accept that some women prefer tall men and it’s something they can’t help.

How Soon Is Now

Uhhh im after going threw most this thread and i still dont know what the topic actually is!


Fat racist small dicks on tinder?

jimmycrackcorm

There is a fat filter.

Experienced this myself. Had a match with a beauty on tinder. Started chatting and it was like we were soul mates.

Asked her out after a week and we met up. Well, if it hadn't been for my ex, who I get on well with and who suggested that head only photos suggested hiding body issues, I would have gotten a shock when she walked in.

But I was hooked by our chats so now I'm going out with someone that I'd never have picked otherwise.

Turns out that looks aren't actually everything. Who'd have thunk it?

armaghlad

I’m not sure if this had been previously mentioned, but Tinder also needs a baby-mama filter.

Dalomanakora

jimmycrackcorm wrote: »

There is a fat filter.

Experienced this myself. Had a match with a beauty on tinder. Started chatting and it was like we were soul mates.

Asked her out after a week and we met up. Well, if it hadn't been for my ex, who I get on well with and who suggested that head only photos suggested hiding body issues, I would have gotten a shock when she walked in.

But I was hooked by our chats so now I'm going out with someone that I'd never have picked otherwise.

Turns out that looks aren't actually everything. Who'd have thunk it?

Looks aren't everything, but you can't shag a personality.

The whole deception of only posting her face would have turned me off too, but ultimately you've obviously seen something you like in her so happy days and I hope it goes well



I'm fat. I used to be an awful lot bigger, so as a size 14 now (too big for my height before anyone spouts on about average clothing sizes), I'm confident enough to post full body shots if I decide to try online dating (recently single too!). I really really hate to think how much a woman must dislike herself to only post well angled face shots. She knows she's setting herself up for disaster because of the deception but Jesus, imagine hating yourself that much?



People lie about lots of stuff with online dating though, not just weight. Age, height, job, relationship status, family status and name are some I've come across several years back.




So just carry on. If you don't like overweight women, don't ask someone on a date if they don't post full body pics. Simple really.

dartboardio

So so so glad I am in a long term relationship and don’t use these apps for absolute lowlifes ticking boxes about what you will accept or won’t accept in a partner when you’re struggling to ‘find one’ as it is

When in reality everyone is so different and a guy who claims ‘no fatties’ could end up with a girl considered fat just because he likes her. I can’t believe I’m stooping down to the level and having to justify a ‘fat girl’ but I remember being younger and I was quite overweight, I used to wonder why no one liked me, I’d see these fat girls like me and wonder why they had so many friends and people interested in them, turns out people didn’t dislike me because I was fat they disliked me because I wasn’t a nice person (negative self image so came through in my personality)

So really taught me it absolutely makes no odds. People will like or dislike for you. But how can they do that looking at a phone screen anyway

And there’s no point sayin you dislike fat girls bevause whats a fat girl? It depends on how she carries her weight I know some girls that are fat but are absolutely gorgeous and have many men that would usually go for slim girls, fancying them.

Where as when I was overweight no one was attracted to me because I didn’t carry my weight well, I looked frumpy and you could tell I didn’t like myself so that makes all the difference.

Depends on the girl, some ‘fat girls’ you disregard their weight as they seem gorgeous inside and out.

One eyed Jack

dartboardio wrote: »

So so so glad I am in a long term relationship and don’t use these apps for absolute lowlifes ticking boxes about what you will accept or won’t accept in a partner when you’re struggling to ‘find one’ as it is

When in reality everyone is so different and a guy who claims ‘no fatties’ could end up with a girl considered fat just because he likes her. I can’t believe I’m stooping down to the level and having to justify a ‘fat girl’ but I remember being younger and I was quite overweight, I used to wonder why no one liked me, I’d see these fat girls like me and wonder why they had so many friends and people interested in them, turns out people didn’t dislike me because I was fat they disliked me because I wasn’t a nice person (negative self image so came through in my personality)

So really taught me it absolutely makes no odds. People will like or dislike for you. But how can they do that looking at a phone screen anyway

That’s not justifying fat girls, that’s explaining why nobody liked you. Just from reading the above few sentences alone I can see your attitude towards other people hasn’t changed as much as you like to think it has, IMO.

And there’s no point sayin you dislike fat girls bevause whats a fat girl? It depends on how she carries her weight I know some girls that are fat but are absolutely gorgeous and have many men that would usually go for slim girls, fancying them.

Where as when I was overweight no one was attracted to me because I didn’t carry my weight well, I looked frumpy and you could tell I didn’t like myself so that makes all the difference.

There is of course a point in saying you don’t like fat girls, as much as there’s a point in me saying I like fat girls. What’s a fat girl? It’s a girl who’s fat. Very simple, and there’s only so much clothes can conceal, you’re kidding yourself if you’re gonna tell me you can’t tell the difference between a girl who is a size 8 and a girl who is a size 16. I’m not saying you would have to guess their sizes exactly, I’m saying that if you can’t tell the difference, you may well need a visit to specsavers, or stop telling people what you believe should be their reality, because one of us is deluding ourselves.

I too know plenty of girls who are fat and are absolutely gorgeous and they carry their weight well and all the rest of it. They’re still fat though, and they aren’t attractive to many guys. They aren’t trying to be attractive to any guys though, they don’t need the validation. They are just as picky about their choices when it comes to potential partners because they’ve never seen themselves as charity cases to be taken pity upon in the hope of a pity date and a five minute fumble between the sheets. They’re quite aware that first and foremost for most people is physical attraction, and the whole personality stuff is secondary in terms of a potential relationship.

Depends on the girl, some ‘fat girls’ you disregard their weight as they seem gorgeous inside and out.

It does indeed depend on the girl, but there isn’t such a shortage of girls that guys can’t whittle down their potential dating pool or that girls can’t whittle down their dating pool by filtering out the tyre kickers and time wasters and people they just don’t find physically attractive. You’d swear dating apps were some kind of charity initiative the way some people go on. I’m sure there’s a market for an app for social justice warrior dating if that’s your thing, but the likes of tinder, bumble etc probably aren’t it (unless they saw it as a business opportunity of course).

cannotlogin

Forget weight filters - all photos should be accurately dated stamped.

Tell me how

completedit wrote: »

It definitely is tbf. And it's not all okay, how the **** can it be all okay? Tell that to people who cry at home and want to ****ing step out on front of a train because they've been rejected outright and humiliated because of their dick size.:mad::mad::mad::mad:

If you genuinely feel this way, you need help. It is not something that you just have to deal with on your own. There was an article on the radio during the week where a clinical physiologist spoke about body dysmorphia, how difficult it can be and how to start getting help with it.

Body Dysmorphia


The podcast in question is from Tuesday the 6th November and is called "On the couch".

completedit wrote: »

I'm 9 per cent bf so I'm not some typical hippo. I think that shows how small I am tbh because averages take into account fatties who if they lost weight would gain a few inches. The kind of girls I know aren't getting with fat guys so I imagine the average they've experienced is like 6 inches or so.

I would strongly suspect that your attitude (and expectation that you are going to be rejected) is an infinitely bigger reason why you struggle with relationships than any of your physical attributes.

Try to work on your own sense and self worth. The rest will then be more likely to happen.

Lia_lia

Some people are so picky when it comes to looks. I know plenty of overweight women who are absolutely stunning. Many women put on weight anyway after a few years in a relationship. I've put on almost 20KG (!!) since I started going out with my fella. But I was underweight to begin with and still not overweight after putting on 20KG.

The mens height thing I another one I don't understand. I've friends who are average female height (5'4"/5'5") who won't go out with anyone over 6 foot. And then give out they are are single My OH is the exact same height as me (5'9") and doesn't bother me in the slightest.

kerryjack

I turned down this big heafty lady one night about 20 years ago i think she was Canadian she was 6 foot tall and 3 foot wide. I do often think back and wonder what she would be like , its a regret i have . If ye are able lads go out tonight and grab one and let me know tomorrow how ye get on.

Dtp1979

kerryjack wrote: »

I turned down this big heafty lady one night about 20 years ago i think she was Canadian she was 6 foot tall and 3 foot wide. I do often think back and wonder what she would be like , its a regret i have . If ye are able lads go out tonight and grab one and let me know tomorrow how ye get on.

Looks like she dodged a bullet tbh

skittles8710

Lia_lia wrote: »

Some people are so picky when it comes to looks. I know plenty of overweight women who are absolutely stunning. Many women put on weight anyway after a few years in a relationship. I've put on almost 20KG (!!) since I started going out with my fella. But I was underweight to begin with and still not overweight after putting on 20KG.

The mens height thing I another one I don't understand. I've friends who are average female height (5'4"/5'5") who won't go out with anyone over 6 foot. And then give out they are are single My OH is the exact same height as me (5'9") and doesn't bother me in the slightest.

You can't put on 20kg and not be overweight... unless you were on deaths door beforehand ,!!!

completedit

Sounds like Lia_Lia has found her way to COPEnhagen.

Wibbs

completedit wrote: »

Sounds like Lia_Lia has found her way to COPEnhagen.

Jesus. Hardly. :rolleyes: While I have an issue with the "many women put on weight" in longtermers*, that's under three stone? Depends on hight and starting weight. A mate of mine is 5'10" and she was very thin. She put on about the same weight(cos she got healthy and into fitness. No bloke involved) and she looked better and was still within the realms of slim. And I say that as someone who favours thin and delicate of frame women.





*just as I would understand however hurtful it might be that if I bloated out and got lazy that a partner could and likely would find that a major turnoff.

Lia_lia

skittles8710 wrote: »

You can't put on 20kg and not be overweight... unless you were on deaths door beforehand ,!!!

Nope. I’m just over 5’9” and was 54 kg at my thinnest. Was too thin, but not on deaths door by any means. Now I’m 73-74 kg. I’m tall and a size 12 so definitely wouldn’t be considered overweight.

Bigbagofcans

Lia_lia wrote: »

Some people are so picky when it comes to looks. I know plenty of overweight women who are absolutely stunning. Many women put on weight anyway after a few years in a relationship. I've put on almost 20KG (!!) since I started going out with my fella. But I was underweight to begin with and still not overweight after putting on 20KG.

The mens height thing I another one I don't understand. I've friends who are average female height (5'4"/5'5") who won't go out with anyone over 6 foot. And then give out they are are single My OH is the exact same height as me (5'9") and doesn't bother me in the slightest.

But some people are just not attracted to overweight people no matter how much people try to convince them otherwise.
I'm not attracted to men who aren't in shape, I can't choose who I fancy.

Same goes for height. I'm just not into small/average height guys and there's nothing wrong with that.

Dalomanakora

Bigbagofcans wrote: »

But some people are just not attracted to overweight people no matter how much people try to convince them otherwise.
I'm not attracted to men who aren't in shape, I can't choose who I fancy.

Same goes for height. I'm just not into small/average height guys and there's nothing wrong with that.

Absolutely. Men and women have preferences.


It's just sad that people on boards seem to hone in on women who are overweight - there's fcuk all said about overweight men, whereas according to many posters on boards, you're a lazy, fat, unmotivated slob if you're 10lbs overweight.



If posters on boards who hate fat women saw me out and about, they'd think the same of me. She's fat, she's lazy, she's a slob. Little would they know by looking at me that I've worked my arse off over the last year to lose 4.5 stone, despite being literally bedbound from serious illness for a chunk of time.


They'd just make nasty, unkind assumptions as to who I am just because I'm not at THEIR ideal size YET.


The vitriol towards women who are overweight is fcuking vile.

completedit

What are you on about? Men are absolutely crucified for everything, remember a man is only as good as his worst flaw. Men get absolutely abused for everything, hair, hairline, height, dick size, fat just isn't that high on the list for men.

Dalomanakora

completedit wrote: »

What are you on about? Men are absolutely crucified for everything, remember a man is only as good as his worst flaw. Men get absolutely abused for everything, hair, hairline, height, dick size, fat just isn't that high on the list for men.

Please, show me all of the threads on boards where men are crucified for their penis size, hairline etc.

Once you've found them, compare them to the sheer number of threads about women's weight.



You've consistently projected your on insecurities on people in this thread and I really think you should talk to someone. It's not normal or healthy to hate yourself so much and you deserve happiness.