Devisive flat mate issues

Mooooo

When in college one of the housemates was a Chinese post grad., quiet enough lad kept to himself most of the time. A few strange habits, would microwave raw burgers for his dinner and that. Also had breadmakers and the like but only used them in his room and he had the box room. Anyway over the space of a few weeks in the middle of the year the we noticed a few odd things like a bit of noise in the middle of the night and the odd thing moved in the house when we may have been in and out when the Chinese lad wasn't there. Turns out his mother was over for a visit and was staying in his room., she was there 4 weeks before we figured it out. She came for 6 weeks didn't leave the house bar to go to the airport

freshpopcorn

Mooooo wrote: »

When in college one of the housemates was a Chinese post grad., quiet enough lad kept to himself most of the time. A few strange habits, would microwave raw burgers for his dinner and that. Also had breadmakers and the like but only used them in his room and he had the box room. Anyway over the space of a few weeks in the middle of the year the we noticed a few odd things like a bit of noise in the middle of the night and the odd thing moved in the house when we may have been in and out when the Chinese lad wasn't there. Turns out his mother was over for a visit and was staying in his room., she was there 4 weeks before we figured it out. She came for 6 weeks didn't leave the house bar to go to the airport

Was she baking bread?

Mooooo

freshpopcorn wrote: »

Was she baking bread?

No idea saw her the day she was leaving. Didnt bother us so made no odds

m5ex9oqjawdg2i

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Nothing at all wrong with it you don't mind your house being razed to the ground. Tea towels + grease + tumble dryers = not in my house you don't!

I've even seen them spontaneously combust on a radiator.

Your house or a house you were sharing with others?

messy tessy

The Backwards Man wrote: »

I was in a house share once, first evening there, one of the eejits used a teatowel as an oven glove.

That was enough for me, my dog has more upbringing than that.

Housemates that dry their hands on a tea towel when there is a hand towel right there. Ahhhhh! Does my head in.

bananabread12

Won't pay for toilet paper because he says he doesn't use it.

branie2

I got on well with my flatmates when I was in college

osarusan

He would come home really pissed, put some bread under the grill to make toast (even though we had a toaster, he liked his bread toasted on only one side), then fall asleep.

The toast would burn and set off the fire alarm. Happened loads of times. After we finally said it had to stop, he suggested taking the battery out of the fire alarm, and sure wouldn't everything be grand then lads.

Snugglebunnies

I lived with a Swedish girl one time who kept filling up all the bins in the house with books. I don't know where she was getting so many or what she was using them for. She obviously wasn't reading them with the rate she was filling up the bins.

Paddy Cow

I was friends with a girl for 12 years and we decided to live together. Big mistake. We were great as friends but wound each other up as housemates. It lasted three months before we went our separate ways. Haven't kept in contact since

Robsweezie

Paddy Cow wrote: »

I was friends with a girl for 12 years and we decided to live together. Big mistake. We were great as friends but wound each other up as housemates. It lasted three months before we went our separate ways. Haven't kept in contact since

what changed? was it just annoying habits?

...And Justice

Robsweezie wrote: »

what changed? was it just annoying habits?

You should have settled it with a good rattle.

Paddy Cow

...And Justice wrote: »

You should have settled it with a good rattle.

We're both straight females. I don't think that would help :P

Jobs OXO

Paddy Cow wrote: »

We're both straight females. I don't think that would help :P

Should had one of the lads come over for some FFM action then. The tension would have just evaporated

Paddy Cow

Robsweezie wrote: »

what changed? was it just annoying habits?

Personality clash. Like I said, we were fine as friends but didn't work as housemates. I live on my own now (apart from all my animals, who by the way make the best flatmates :pac:) but if I had to go back to house share, I'd never again live with a friend. I think it's easier with strangers. If they get on your nerves you can be annoyed with them but get on with your life, go see your friends and bitch about them to get it off your chest. If you live with your friend and they are getting on your nerves, it makes it a whole lot worse.

notsoyoungwan

I had one housemate who left her used sanitary towels lying open/unwrapped in the bathroom bin. Skank.

Cakes and Ale

I once had a guy move in who stuck to his room almost all of the time, which is fair enough, but after a while everyone started to notice that there seemed to be less cutlery and dishes. Rest of the house investigated his room was when he was away for a few days - he was stacking up used plates and cutlery to avoid washing anything. Worst was a bean-encrusted plate on one of his bedside tables, which had been there for quite some time. After him, the gay postgrad who insisted on opening every window all the time - if someone was watching TV and stepped out to get something, the windows would be open when you came back! - seemed fairly normal.

Paddy Cow

Paddy Cow wrote: »

Personality clash. Like I said, we were fine as friends but didn't work as housemates. I live on my own now (apart from all my animals, who by the way make the best flatmates :pac:) but if I had to go back to house share, I'd never again live with a friend. I think it's easier with strangers. If they get on your nerves you can be annoyed with them but get on with your life, go see your friends and bitch about them to get it off your chest. If you live with your friend and they are getting on your nerves, it makes it a whole lot worse.

Yeah it's a tough one. Lived with a mate and it went pear-shaped. Was a lot of little things that just dragged on. But being able to go to the pub or have an impromptu BBQ/film night with a buddy is nice at the same time.

leggo

Cakes and Ale wrote: »

I once had a guy move in who stuck to his room almost all of the time, which is fair enough, but after a while everyone started to notice that there seemed to be less cutlery and dishes. Rest of the house investigated his room was when he was away for a few days - he was stacking up used plates and cutlery to avoid washing anything. Worst was a bean-encrusted plate on one of his bedside tables, which had been there for quite some time. After him, the gay postgrad who insisted on opening every window all the time - if someone was watching TV and stepped out to get something, the windows would be open when you came back! - seemed fairly normal.

That sounds like a passive aggressive way of suggesting you all smell. I've lived in a few houseshares so I could write the passive aggressive dictionary by now.

Had one housemate who used to blast music at all hours, never showered (because he lived downstairs, didn't "like stairs" and that's where the shower was), didn't wash his clothes and fell out with his Mam so stank permanently thereafter, would invite 20 people over on a whim...I could go on. It was annoying because I was living with passive nerdy lads who were afraid to speak up out of fear of losing a friend, so they put up with and I had to be the bad guy bringing up issues and teaching this dude how to adult.

It ended one night when two girls came home with him after a night out. One went to sleep on the couch while he stayed in bed with another. We were all awoken to the girls screams and yelling "YOU ****ING SCUMBAG!" over and over. She ran out and left the door open, and a couple minutes later her friend followed chasing her. By this stage we're all at the top of the stairs wondering what the **** happened. He came out, looked at us and just shrugged his shoulders and went back inside. Finally the possible sexual assault was enough to have the others speak up too and he was gone within a couple weeks. It was a harrowing experience and I always felt bad not following up with the Gardai, but what do you say having not even seen the girl in question?

mojesius

Shared a big old house with four other girls. My room was the attic room with the boiler in it. The boiler never heated the water properly and we had to pester the letting agency for months to get it fixed. Just because the boiler was in my room, I was automatically assigned the role of boiler maintenance engineer for the house. Every morning, id be awoken by one of them in their towels at my door complaining about the cold water and accusing me of tampering with the fcuking broken boiler and demanding I get up and help them fix it.

One of them moved her sister in for a few weeks and put a bed in our dining room, which had adjoining doors to the sitting room. Great craic sitting down to watch tv on a sunday evening with a cup of tea while the sister was banging her fella loudly in the next room, adjoining doors shaking violently.

Two housemates had boyfriends, who'd stay over 3/4 nights a week, which usually meant the sitting room was taken over by a couple spooning on the couch six nights a week.

Never again.

The Highwayman

corner of hells wrote: »

I work in a homeless hostel , ya'all ain't seen nothing.

I so want to hear some of your yarns

JupiterKid

So the moral of the story is: houseshare is hell. It's crappy. You have to do it cos you're young and broke. You "get on" with your housemates but in reality you'd prefer to have a place to yourself.

And roomshare with a stranger is just so so wrong on so many levels.:(

lawred2

Poor Uncle Tom wrote: »

They use the doors properly, you interfere with the fire safety of the building!



Actually, you're the one needs the education.

lame attempt at seeking a rise... You know well that someone letting fire doors slam behind them repeatedly at any time of day is taking the p!ss

leggo

JupiterKid wrote: »

So the moral of the story is: houseshare is hell. It's crappy. You have to do it cos you're young and broke. You "get on" with your housemates but in reality you'd prefer to have a place to yourself.

And roomshare with a stranger is just so so wrong on so many levels.:(

I don't know. I'm older and crankier now and more comfortable in my skin so I think I'd appreciate a place to myself now if it made financial sense (I could afford it but something would get the squeeze between savings, my future and social life), but in years past I would've seen it as lonely hell. There was a two year period when I was living with two mates in Dublin City, we were all single in our 20's and going out weekly bringing girls back, and it's probably the most fun period of my life. At the time I used to always say "this is what we'll think of when we're older and beat down by life and reminisce on the good old days." We had our ups and downs but now they're all just funny stories we talk about when we see each other.

The past six months, I've lived with one mate I'm not as close with (and I like it that way, despite how good it was I wouldn't live with close mates again, I've ticked that box and now want space to myself) and a girl we got off Daft and, in terms of the things that could wreck your head, it's been the best six months. We all flow nicely with each other's lives, everyone does their bit, no issues with paying bills, it just works.

So I wouldn't say house shares are all hell. Bad house shares are, for sure, but if you use the experience, learn from it and be smart about future decisions, it can work and work really well. Like I said, when I'm married with kids I'll probably long for my house sharing days at times!

lawred2

Cakes and Ale wrote: »

I once had a guy move in who stuck to his room almost all of the time, which is fair enough, but after a while everyone started to notice that there seemed to be less cutlery and dishes. Rest of the house investigated his room was when he was away for a few days - he was stacking up used plates and cutlery to avoid washing anything. Worst was a bean-encrusted plate on one of his bedside tables, which had been there for quite some time. After him, the gay postgrad who insisted on opening every window all the time - if someone was watching TV and stepped out to get something, the windows would be open when you came back! - seemed fairly normal.

Obviously he was telling you all that you stank. How did you not cop that?

lawred2

House shared for a long time and generally speaking aside from some oddities I never really had any major issues..

I do remember one occassion where some girl had made some cous cous and there were some leftovers sitting in a bowl - this bowl was some earthenware thing.

It sat in the fridge for months. Every day you would see it there taking up space in the fridge. There was a plate sitting on top of it and every now and then I'd take a peek inside - those leftovers were being colonised at an impressive rate considering the chilled environment. Well after one month too many I finally broke, grabbed the bowl and horsed it out into the trash. I certainly wasn't cleaning out the toxic contents.

Given that it had sat in the fridge for such a length of time - one would have presumed that this girl cared little for her bowl.

That evening - an inquisition as to where the f**k the bowl had gone.

Seriously, she noticed it missing immediately despite leaving it to fester for months in the fridge. Was she engaged in some science experiment?

gramar

osarusan wrote: »

He would come home really pissed, put some bread under the grill to make toast (even though we had a toaster, he liked his bread toasted on only one side), then fall asleep.

The toast would burn and set off the fire alarm. Happened loads of times. After we finally said it had to stop, he suggested taking the battery out of the fire alarm, and sure wouldn't everything be grand then lads.

Was he English and were you living in New York at the time?

leggo

Over-shopping is a big pet peeve of mine. I lived with one lad who went through a phase of trying to be The Rock and wanted the diet to match. So one week I come home with my shopping and, we had two fridges, and BOTH were filled to the brim with this prick's food! I texted him to say I was moving whatever off the measly two small shelves I only ever used out onto the kitchen table and he could find a new home for them when he got in. For some reason, he was angry at life for teaching him this lesson and ignored me for a while afterwards. I guess I was wrong to want to have food myself. It was selfish of me in hindsight.

He's still not The Rock by the way.

JupiterKid

House shares when they work out well can be great but in my experience when you have a few people of different personalities, values and upbringings and attitudes to sharing spaces and cleanliness it's a recipe for trouble.

It just takes one incident for house relations to sour hugely and often irreversibly. People do what they do and this can clash badly in a houseshare environment. But it's a rite of passage for most of us.

Poor Uncle Tom

lawred2 wrote: »

lame attempt at seeking a rise... You know well that someone letting fire doors slam behind them repeatedly at any time of day is taking the p!ss

Taking the p!ss or not, removing the closing mechanism on a fire door isn't the answer.