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Wives... were you glad pubs weren't open today

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    #722
    .......
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,057 ✭✭✭.......


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    #723
    Shenshen
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators Posts: 9,453 Mod ✭✭✭✭Shenshen


    Alma Weak Stabilizer wrote: »
    There is no justification for a person to stay at home by choice if there are no kids. Both should be out working and earning their own money.

    Why? I'm honestly curious.


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    #724
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    #725
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Shenshen wrote: »
    Why? I'm honestly curious.
    ....... wrote: »
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    Its basically scrounging and I certainly would be totally unwilling to fund this type of lifestyle from my salary.


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    #726
    andekwarhola
    Registered Users Posts: 4,638 ✭✭✭andekwarhola


    ....... wrote: »
    So being a home maker contributes nothing to a marriage in your world?

    What a sad place.


    Can't see how somebody would stay at home all day and not work at least part time, barring incapacity or having children.

    My opinion only of course.

    Calling it scrounging is a bit extreme as it's their choice but it just strikes me as being kept or something.


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    #727
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    #728
    pilly
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,005 ✭✭✭pilly


    This is the thread that keeps on giving.


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    #729
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    ....... wrote: »
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    But they basically would be sitting at home scratching themselves as there would be nothing to do most of the time and look at all the money that would be given up (especially if both were high earners) and all that could be bought with it.

    Most people want to work anyway so its a total non-runner. Even people I know on maternity leave are itching to get back to work and out of the house and thats with all the work of minding a baby, imagine how boring it would be to be a home maker with no kids. Similar for people who retire and find they struggle with all the free time.


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    #730
    RuMan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 469 ✭✭RuMan


    ....... wrote: »
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    I'd suggest if you're in position where you don't have to work you should pursue a job you love. It wouldn't even have to be a job you love, just something you love. '
    I cant see how anyone can be fulfilled spending the whole time house cleaning.
    That seems an enormous waste of potential to me. But each to their own.


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    #731
    Murrisk
    Closed Accounts Posts: 889 ✭✭✭Murrisk


    Well, I'd agree that both members of the couple need to pull their weight. Staying home to clean and cook when there are no children does not deserve subsidisation. Two people don't create that much mess. It's not a full-time job.


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    #732
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    #733
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    #734
    andekwarhola
    Registered Users Posts: 4,638 ✭✭✭andekwarhola


    ....... wrote: »
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    If you have a domestic situation that you're both happy with, that's cool.

    I just don't think I could fully enjoy pursuing my 'various interests' if somebody else was paying for it.

    I'd also wonder what would happen if a decade or two or so down the line, we broke up and I had to put cooking, pet-minding and self-expansion on the CV when hitting the job trail.


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    #735
    Shenshen
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators Posts: 9,453 Mod ✭✭✭✭Shenshen


    Alma Weak Stabilizer wrote: »
    But they basically would be sitting at home scratching themselves as there would be nothing to do most of the time and look at all the money that would be given up (especially if both were high earners) and all that could be bought with it.

    Granted, they would not have the stress that employment usually brings.
    However, when my husband was unemployed for a while I actually realised how much I enjoyed him being home. I came home to a clean house every day, my clothes were washed, the grass was cut, all those hundreds of little jobs you somehow try and fit into the weekends and then get angry with yourself for not being able to finish all were all done.
    We both had more time to do the things we like as well as more time for each other, and I certainly didn't feel like he was scrounging. It definitely made up for the lack of money that came with it.
    But he wants to keep working, so he does.


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    #736
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    #737
    RuMan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 469 ✭✭RuMan


    ....... wrote: »
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    You didn't say that. If you are doing things great.
    Initially (other then going to the gym) it seemed you were just cleaning the house. A homemaker (without kids) isn't a full time thing. If its used an opportunity to explore interests fair enough.


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    #738
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Shenshen wrote: »
    Granted, they would not have the stress that employment usually brings.
    However, when my husband was unemployed for a while I actually realised how much I enjoyed him being home. I came home to a clean house every day, my clothes were washed, the grass was cut, all those hundreds of little jobs you somehow try and fit into the weekends and then get angry with yourself for not being able to finish all were all done.
    We both had more time to do the things we like as well as more time for each other, and I certainly didn't feel like he was scrounging. It definitely made up for the lack of money that came with it.
    But he wants to keep working, so he does.

    We barely spend an hour or two on household stuff over the weekend as there is usually very little to do not sure how two people are generating so many tasks.


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    #739
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    #740
    andekwarhola
    Registered Users Posts: 4,638 ✭✭✭andekwarhola


    ....... wrote: »
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    If it works for people, why not. Only saying what would work for me.

    Obviously if I could give up work today, I'd snap a hand off to do it.

    By the way, your username keeps making me think somebody has snipped your name from a reply :pac:


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    #741
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    #742
    Shenshen
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators Posts: 9,453 Mod ✭✭✭✭Shenshen


    Alma Weak Stabilizer wrote: »
    We barely spend an hour or two on household stuff over the weekend as there is usually very little to do not sure how two people are generating so many tasks.

    I take 2 hours every week just hoovering and mopping the house.
    This is before doing things like washing the windows, dusting, cleaning the kitchen, cleaning the oven, cleaning the bathrooms and doing the laundry.
    And all that is before I even set foot into the garden, or wash the cars.
    On top of that, you have the regular maintenance that comes with having a house - you'll have to clean out the gutters occasionally, paint walls sometimes, cut back the trees, weed the flower and vegetable patches, fix things that get broken, etc.


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    #743
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    #744
    Shenshen
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators Posts: 9,453 Mod ✭✭✭✭Shenshen


    andekwarhola wrote: »
    If it works for people, why not. Only saying what would work for me.

    Obviously if I could give up work today, I'd snap a hand off to do it.

    By the way, your username keeps making me think somebody has snipped your name from a reply :pac:

    I'd be one of the weird people - I do like to work.
    Yes, if I won the lotto I'd quit the job I'm doing now, but I would simply change to working full-time for charity.
    I don't honestly know if my husband would enjoy me being home as much as I enjoyed him being home, he never had the chance to experience it yet. All I can say is that I loved it when he was home full-time :D


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    #745
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    ....... wrote: »
    This post has been deleted.
    Shenshen wrote: »
    I take 2 hours every week just hoovering and mopping the house.
    This is before doing things like washing the windows, dusting, cleaning the kitchen, cleaning the oven, cleaning the bathrooms and doing the laundry.
    And all that is before I even set foot into the garden, or wash the cars.
    On top of that, you have the regular maintenance that comes with having a house - you'll have to clean out the gutters occasionally, paint walls sometimes, cut back the trees, weed the flower and vegetable patches, fix things that get broken, etc.

    Don't do anything during the week either really bar cook the dinner and load/empty the dishwasher. Cleaner once every two weeks covers the vast majority of household cleaning so never have to hover, dust, clean bathroom etc. Laundry throw a wash on once a week at most and hang up to try takes 5 mins (or bring it home), don't do ironing (shirts dropped into cleaners for pressing nothing else really needs it), grass about 2 hours every second week, grocery shopping about 30 mins Sunday night, buy lunch everyday so no prep. Aside from cutting grass I don't think combined we would spend more than one to two hours on house hold stuff across a normal weekend (not including cooking). I'm only there about half the weekends also as I go home so in theory it builds up (but its so little it really doesn't).


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    #746
    Shenshen
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators Posts: 9,453 Mod ✭✭✭✭Shenshen


    Alma Weak Stabilizer wrote: »
    Don't do anything during the week either really bar cook the dinner and load/empty the dishwasher. Cleaner once every two weeks covers the vast majority of household cleaning so never have to hover, dust, clean bathroom etc. Laundry throw a wash on once a week at most and hang up to try takes 5 mins (or bring it home), don't do ironing (shirts dropped into cleaners for pressing nothing else really needs it), grass about 2 hours every second week, grocery shopping about 30 mins Sunday night. Aside form cutting grass I don't think combined we would spend more than one to two hours on house hold stuff across a normal weekend (not including cooking). I'm only there about half the weekends also as I go home so in theory it builds up (but its so little it really doesn't).

    Not to de-rail the thread here, but I would refuse to live in a house where floors and bathrooms were only cleaned every 2 weeks, nevermind the state the cooker and oven would be in.


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    #747
    pilly
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 9,005 ✭✭✭pilly


    Shenshen wrote: »
    Not to de-rail the thread here, but I would refuse to live in a house where floors and bathrooms were only cleaned every 2 weeks, nevermind the state the cooker and oven would be in.

    Oh this thread was de-railed a long time ago. ;)


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    #748
    .......
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,057 ✭✭✭.......


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    #749
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Shenshen wrote: »
    Not to de-rail the thread here, but I would refuse to live in a house where floors and bathrooms were only cleaned every 2 weeks, nevermind the state the cooker and oven would be in.

    Would you believe I sometimes think once every 3 weeks would be enough such is how clean the place still is after two weeks (don't even know if the cleaner cleans the oven, we don't and it's pretty much spotless), obviously jobs get a rub after use if stuff has spilled etc.


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    #750
    RuMan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 469 ✭✭RuMan


    Shenshen wrote: »
    Not to de-rail the thread here, but I would refuse to live in a house where floors and bathrooms were only cleaned every 2 weeks, nevermind the state the cooker and oven would be in.

    Well if the only alternative was spending all day every Saturday and Sunday cleaning I think I'd take the "dirty" house.

    Couple of hours a week, anything more is excessive. How dirty could a house be if everyone's at work most of the week ?


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    #751
    irelandrover
    Registered Users Posts: 3,715 ✭✭✭irelandrover


    Alma Weak Stabilizer wrote: »
    Would you believe I sometimes think once every 3 weeks would be enough such is how clean the place still is after two weeks (don't even know if the cleaner cleans the oven, we don't and it's pretty much spotless), obviously jobs get a rub after use if stuff has spilled etc.

    I'm going to have a guess at this but i'd say your "spotless"and Shenshen's "spotless" are completely different


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