How fake of a person are you?

paleoperson

I feel like I am such a fake person.

I rarely respect or like people the way I pretend to. I generally do it because I find it makes things easier for me.

I try and figure people out, to think out what they would expect of me or like me to say. Sometimes I plan conversations, to make myself seem smarter or informed etc.. It's not a proper way to deal with people at all, is it?

What do you think, and how fake are you?

Wabbit Ears

We all wear a mask, some do it more than others, but we all do it.

CalamariFritti

That sounds like a lot of wasted energy, because ultimately ... who cares anyway?

brevity

paleoperson wrote: »

I feel like I am such a fake person.

I rarely respect or like people the way I pretend to. I generally do it because I find it makes things easier for me.

I try and figure people out, to think out what they would expect of me or like me to say. Sometimes I plan conversations, to make myself seem smarter or informed etc.. It's not a proper way to deal with people at all, is it?

What do you think, and how fake are you?

I do this all the time. I'd imagine we are not alone.

5rtytry56

My own morsel of wisdom:
Where ignorance is bliss, 'tis folly to be wise.

hairyslug

Possibly my wife is the only one who knows or who has ever known the real me.

nomdeboardie

My username says it all :P

me_irl

Fake it 'til you make it. Just look at Trump.

tayto lover

We all pretend.
It's a coping mechanism.

Elemonator

The Japanese have a proverb saying you have three faces, coined by a Jesuit missionary. The first face, you show to the world. The second face, you show to your close friends, and your family. The third face, you never show anyone. It is the truest reflection of who you are.

bodice ripper

I am as I appear.

dashoonage

dashoonage may or may not be my real name.

ERG89

Its sometimes better to pretend or lie than be honest. I try to be honest & imo it gets you into more trouble & issues than being "fake" ever will be.

neonsofa

In work I would be quite fake because the people who present to me need me to be put together and knowledgeable and calm. I rarely actually am. I also pretend to understand them moreso than I actually do, not in a malicious way, but if they find something difficult or frustrating, I will try to empathise with them so that they don't feel like I am frustrated or belittling their fristration. Sometimes I feel very false because I am thinking one thing but saying another, but I wouldn't be doing my job if I didn't do that. I suppose ideally my thoughts/feelings should match how I behave but in reality they don't always so I have to pretend for the sake of those I am trying to help.


Everybody else knows I'm a mess though. I don't try to hide that if I'm not being paid to :pac:

freshpopcorn

I'd consider myself polite to almost everybody!

begbysback

If I were money then I'd be a three pound note

99problems

Not fake at all , people don't like me because of it. Well that and I'm an asshole

suicide_circus

Not fake enough

nkav86

Completely, I hate people but have always worked in a customer facing role so I have the fake smile, tone of voice and just general pleasantness. But see me in person, I'm a surly b1tch type that doesn't want to be disturbed.... Delightful!

Your Face

Well its either acting fake or jailtime so...

Press_Start

Respect is earned not expected. I have my close friends, just one or two, who get my weird kind of ****ed up humour, but I still put on some form of manliness to feel alpha like we always do.
With my other colleagues I try and make jokes as often as I can, Since I was young and a friend of mine who was always very outgoing went away for a few weeks, I started cracking jokes and being a bit more outgoing. It just stuck and now that's my personality among friends.
With my mother, who I'm very close to, and my missus, I think I'm at my most natural, just making fun and laughing.
I think it depends who you're with, and it's only human nature to have a few different personality qualities to adapt to, it's being naturally adaptive and important. Those who are the same everywhere tend to be less successful and tend to bumble a lot more.
Like acting like you're at the bar when you're at work. It's fine to to have a standard level, that you can lean back to, but I feel that no-one is themselves all the time, you need to have professional and private personalities.

Widdershins

Not very. I know when to keep my mouth shut and the right things to say (most of the time) but I have never constructed an identity for myself. For a long time, I didn't even realise people do that. I mean modeling themselves on someone they admire, and building their life in that sort of image, not the standard socially appropriate facade that most of us wear in order to rub along with people and tolerate personalities we'd rather not tolerate at times.

joe40

"Sincereity is the most important thing, if you can fake that you have it made" heard that somewhere but don't know the source.
Seriously I think everyone has a persona they display but I think it would be a potential problem if this is too far removed from your true self

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

For good or bad, I'm afraid I'm just me. No point faking things. As for rehearing a conversation in advance... really?

Aongus Von Bismarck

I am an extremely genuine person.

I rarely hide behind the convenience of social norms to conceal my contempt if someone has vexed me due to their own execrable standards.

For instance, we have a middle aged woman called Frida who works as a general orderly in our office. Delivering mail, running errands etc. I generally have very little interaction with her as I have my own PA, Janos. Unfortunately Janos is now absent on Thursday afternoons as he is attending university part time (something I take some credit for, as my daily comments of his lack of formal education qualifications undoubtably got through to him.)

Anyway, two Thursdays ago Frida lumbered in to my office making inane small talk about the weather, her pet beagle and some other nonsense I can't quite recall. I tried to ignore her and continue with my work. The worst part is she wears some ghastly cheap perfume (along with her disastrous and unflattering fashion sense). Within 30 seconds of her presence in my office, the entire room was filled with the putrid stench of her and her perfume.

I cut across her asinine chatter and informed her that I found her aroma extremely noxious and I had neither the time nor the inclination to engage in conversation with her. I instructed her not to enter my office anymore and if she had any mail or documentation to deliver to me, she could leave it with any of the staff members outside to bring it to me. She left the room crying and had the audacity to report me to HR, despite the fact that she had invaded my office and knocked 2.5hrs of productivity from my schedule (I had to leave the office in order to let the place air out)

I always find it is much better to be genuine than to adopt a false persona and hide behind a 'nice' veneer.

I doubt anyone could ever accuse Aonghus of being less than genuine.

There are few people who have the ability to influence anothers life for the better in quite the way you do, Aonghus.

In a few short strokes of the blade you have cut down your erstwhile PA and built him up again, having improved his life prospects immeasurably by pointing out his inexcusable lack of education, and improved everyone elses immediate environment by banishing the malodorous Frida from the vicinity. She probably wears some vulgar, neon-packaged rubbing alcohol, promoted by Britney Spears and sold as part of a 3 for 2 offer in a chain drugstore. In short, she barely deserves to live and everyone is better off without her.

Keep up the good work, you're my role model.

harry Bailey esq

Aongus Von Bismarck wrote: »

I cut across her asinine chatter and informed her that I found her aroma extremely noxious......... She left the room crying and had the audacity to report me to HR

Don't even start me on that HR shower,happiness reducers I call them. As for that ungrateful wench, I'd discipline that one with a heavy hand, a bit of a loose canon I'd wager.
If I were you, I'd make a counter complaint about the toerag to be honest.

Widdershins

You're too soft on them, Aongus. They'll get uppity.

brevity

Aongus Von Bismarck wrote: »

I am an extremely genuine person.

I rarely hide behind the convenience of social norms to conceal my contempt if someone has vexed me due to their own execrable standards.

For instance, we have a middle aged woman called Frida who works as a general orderly in our office. Delivering mail, running errands etc. I generally have very little interaction with her as I have my own PA, Janos. Unfortunately Janos is now absent on Thursday afternoons as he is attending university part time (something I take some credit for, as my daily comments of his lack of formal education qualifications undoubtably got through to him.)

Anyway, two Thursdays ago Frida lumbered in to my office making inane small talk about the weather, her pet beagle and some other nonsense I can't quite recall. I tried to ignore her and continue with my work. The worst part is she wears some ghastly cheap perfume (along with her disastrous and unflattering fashion sense). Within 30 seconds of her presence in my office, the entire room was filled with the putrid stench of her and her perfume.

I cut across her asinine chatter and informed her that I found her aroma extremely noxious and I had neither the time nor the inclination to engage in conversation with her. I instructed her not to enter my office anymore and if she had any mail or documentation to deliver to me, she could leave it with any of the staff members outside to bring it to me. She left the room crying and had the audacity to report me to HR, despite the fact that she had invaded my office and knocked 2.5hrs of productivity from my schedule (I had to leave the office in order to let the place air out)

I always find it is much better to be genuine than to adopt a false persona and hide behind a 'nice' veneer.

You sound like someone who had some video tapes to return.

indioblack

We all have the Chameleon ability. It's vital to live in a world with other people.
Sometimes it's fake, false, conscious, behaviour. Sometimes people are unaware of it - it's just a reaction to oil the wheels, avoid possibly regrettable friction.
Where I work you get the same people turning up everyday - and they aren't exactly the same everyday. All manner of things will change their attitudes and behaviour.
Whether we like it or not we respond differently to different people - dependent on how we feel, what we want etc.
One of my favourites is a guy who is told so and so is on the line to him. Before he picks up the receiver he always says, "I don't want to speak to him".
Then he puts the phone to his ear and goes, "Hello, mate, how are you?".

Mongfinder General

brevity wrote: »

You sound like someone who had some video tapes to return.

He just wants to fit in...

Alf Veedersane

There is an idea of a paleoperson; some kind of abstraction. But there is no real paleoperson: only an entity, something illusory. And though he can hide his cold gaze, and you can shake his hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense your lifestyles are probably comparable... he simply is not there.

Alf Veedersane

I always have an image of Harry Flashman when I read a post by Aongus.

Agricola

Whatever gene you need in order to be able to fake the various attributes of being a people person, or to be able to manipulate others to your own ends, I just don't have. Trying to fake liking people I don't or showing interest where I have none is next to impossible for me.
Life would be a lot easier if I could.

please helpThank YOU

100 Per Cent Truly Genuine Person I am.

please helpThank YOU

please helpThank YOU wrote: »

100 Per Cent Truly Genuine Person I am.

Yoda?

SEPT 23 1989

Brutal honesty is the best policy

Sugar coating is for cakes

Neames

Be yourself.

Worst advice ever.

At work I'm different than I am at home. Just as well they'd walk all over me otherwise.

Jodotman

I just don't like people. I tolerate some people but mostly I hate them.
I do put on an act to friends but I always find faults.

We are all going to end up dead with maggots eating my balls anyway.

Paleblood

I'm quite fake at times. I'm not dishonest and I don't hurt or cheat people, but I'd blow smoke up anyone's arse. It goes a long way.

I first noticed it when I was 17. I was working in this posh lady's house and I spent the whole week complimenting her on her home, her gardens, her successful children. I don't know why really. I was quite poor and I guess I was either impressed, intimidated or both.

When we were finishing up on the Friday she gave me her Technics sound system. She said she was upgrading, and I'm sure she was, but the system she gave me was in mint condition and still on the market for €1200.

Since then it's benefited me a lot, from the free use of villas in Spain to getting my return flights to Australia paid for. And last year I landed a job with a law firm as a result of it. None of it from friends or people close to me. Just people I rub shoulders with that like listening to nice things being said about them and their families.

Call it kissing ass, networking, whatever. It's ruthless and I'm good at it.

stevek93

I am a different person when I visit the parents.

harry Bailey esq

Paleblood wrote: »

I'm quite fake at times. I'm not dishonest and I don't hurt or cheat people, but I'd blow smoke up anyone's arse. It goes a long way.

I first noticed it when I was 17. I was working in this posh lady's house

When we were finishing up on the Friday she said she was upgrading

Call it kissing ass, networking, whatever. It's ruthless and I'm good at it.

Methaphorically kissing ass,or just a week's rimming?Either ways,I'm impressed.

maudgonner

I'm not Maud Gonne,
Not Maud Gonne,
No I'm not Maud Gonne,
Not Maud Gonne
I'm not Maud Gonne,
Not Maud Gonne,
No I'm not Maud Gonne,
Not Maud Gonne

No I'm not Maud Gonne
(But then again neither was she.)

harry Bailey esq

Alf Veedersane wrote: »

I always have an image of Harry Flashman when I read a post by Aongus.

Harry may be flash,but gaudiness doesn't equate to class .To appreciate gussys musings,having some class is a pre-requisite. I'd probably be overstepping the mark by describing him as a misunderstood genius,but then again,a great poster would be an understatement so Aongus is in a limbo of sorts.The marmite of after hours if you will.Ive certainly learnt a lot of things about myself over the past few years as a direct result of his cryptic nuggets of wisdom.

Surreptitious

I'm not even a little bit fake and it doesn't help you get by being honest.

Temptamperu

I keeps it real!

Omackeral

please helpThank YOU wrote: »

100 Per Cent Truly Genuine Person I am.

I reckon you're more like this ;

please helpThank YOU wrote: »

Irish Culture Materialistic race of People all about 171 Cars , New Houses , etc.

doolox

Agendas.
Guile.
Two faced natures.
Public face versus private thoughts.
House devil and street angel.
Treating people differently according to usefulness and rank in the social pecking order.
Power games.
These social phenomena I find very uncomfortable dealing with or taking into account in my dealings with "normal" human beings.
For 52 yrs I thought that I was the same and functioned the same as other human beings. For 52 yrs I was bullied, ostracised and isolated by a significant number of people that I was associated with through school, work and in a social context.

Then I was diagnosed with Aspergers and began to find out my true nature as a person apart and different to most other people on the planet.

I no longer feel guilty about acting in my day to day interactions with people.

I have spent the past 6 years learning about "normal" people and learning how to cope with them and "blending in" without feeling like a fraud.

Everyone has their own limitations, fears, phobias etc which they hide or minimise in the public space.

Hopefully I have learned to do the same.

blinding

Sure I think I'm lovely......but sometimes I catch myself being a bit false..

Maybe its the only way to hold on to one's sanity......

monkeysnapper

Paleblood wrote: »

I'm quite fake at times. I'm not dishonest and I don't hurt or cheat people, but I'd blow smoke up anyone's arse. It goes a long way.

I first noticed it when I was 17. I was working in this posh lady's house and I spent the whole week complimenting her on her home, her gardens, her successful children. I don't know why really. I was quite poor and I guess I was either impressed, intimidated or both.

When we were finishing up on the Friday she gave me her Technics sound system. She said she was upgrading, and I'm sure she was, but the system she gave me was in mint condition and still on the market for €1200.

Since then it's benefited me a lot, from the free use of villas in Spain to getting my return flights to Australia paid for. And last year I landed a job with a law firm as a result of it. None of it from friends or people close to me. Just people I rub shoulders with that like listening to nice things being said about them and their families.

Call it kissing ass, networking, whatever. It's ruthless and I'm good at it.

You sound like a really nice person , and I bet ur really good at your job , you deserve all the good that's coming to you........;)





I'd love to go on a nice holiday to Spain....if only I could afford it . ;(

I used to be a lot more diplomatic.

Now, I find honesty and sincerity just so much easier in the long run. If I don't like someone, I won't pretend I do. If, say, I don't like a friend's behaviour, I'll say it to them. Have lost a few friends who deserved criticism but couldn't handle it...pffffffffft.