Lads I might die in a storm in 8 hours, can you make up prayers to help me?

faceman · 08-01-2017 4:08pm #1

Howyiz. So I'm on a plane to San Francisco at the mo. It's rather lovely. Emergency exit seat, bit of steak for dinner and watching ghostbusters on the telly box (although sound is coming through only 1 headphone.) Theres even wifi.

But the end is nigh. San Francisco is being battered by a storm the severity of which has not been seen in 20 years. People have died already. (On a golf course apparently)

I hate flying so no doubt we are flying into a storm of doom and won't be able to land or will run out of fuel or something. Not due to land for 8 hours.

So there's feck all else for me to do on the plane bar watch movies and surf the web. (Fapping is out so don't even go there!)

So I'd like to the prayers of AH to get time through what could my last 8 hours on this planet.

Can you send me your love via a prayer in true AH style? Religious denomination or lack thereof doesn't matter.

Amen brothers and sisters.

https://www.flightradar24.com/EIN147/c1ca998

The Raptor · 08-01-2017 4:11pm

Trust your pilots, they won't land unless it's safe to do so.

Dr Crayfish · 08-01-2017 4:12pm

Just shut up and die

Barry Badrinath · 08-01-2017 4:13pm

Dear Jesus.

If the plane should go down dont thinketh negative of me for bashing tyne meat whilst in my seat.

If I am to go down, dont let me drown. Id rather an epic explosion over the ocean and spray my body bits all over a sunbathers t1ts.

Yay God

Amen.

ChikiChiki · 08-01-2017 4:14pm

Thinly veiled I'm going to San Fran thread.

You lucky git. Always wanted to go there. :-)

Arevaci · 08-01-2017 4:17pm

faceman wrote: »

San Francisco is being battered by a storm the severity of which has not been seen in 20 years. People have died already.
Amen brothers and sisters.

Surely you can't be serious?

john9876 · 08-01-2017 4:20pm

Allahu Akbar

maudgonner · 08-01-2017 4:20pm

No, no, no. It's Mr T who doesn't like flying! :mad:

Falthyron · 08-01-2017 4:21pm

Don't have the fish.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HA6KGogOrjM

Johnboner · 08-01-2017 4:22pm

1 like = 1 prayer

looksee · 08-01-2017 4:23pm

Yup, he is serious. There is a shocking storm going on over SF, flights delayed, trees down, desperate. I wouldn't go there if I were you. Make sure you have one of the two parachutes.

gifted · 08-01-2017 4:23pm

Any of ye remember that Mod called faceman???....a right nobber he was lol lol

frozenfrozen · 08-01-2017 4:24pm

put your head between your knees

and kiss your bum goodbye

eeguy · 08-01-2017 4:24pm

You'll be grand. trust the pilot

https://youtu.be/QkCQ_-Id8zI?t=3m24s

alchemist33 · 08-01-2017 4:25pm

Dear Lord, if I don't make it back please delete the browser history on my laptop.

130Kph · 08-01-2017 4:25pm

Are you on an A330?

Just curious.

MrPudding · 08-01-2017 4:26pm

Dear pilot, air traffic control and meteorologists, please do your jobs. Amen.

MrP

Blazer · 08-01-2017 4:27pm

faceman wrote: »

I hate flying so no doubt we are flying into a storm of doom and won't be able to land or will run out of fuel or something. Not due to land for 8 hours.
Amen brothers and sisters.

I thought it was BA who was the pussy when it came to planes..

IvyTheTerrible · 08-01-2017 4:27pm

Didn't you have a thread like this a few months ago?
I think you need to do something about your fear of flying!

Ferrari3600 · 08-01-2017 4:28pm

DON'T CALL ME SHIRLEY

Yourself isit · 08-01-2017 4:28pm

A big storm in San Francisco probably no bigger than named storms here.

OldMrBrennan83 · 08-01-2017 4:28pm

This post has been deleted.

lawred2 · 08-01-2017 4:29pm

50mph gusts

Ooooooooh

I think you'll be grand

faceman · 08-01-2017 4:32pm

130Kph wrote: »

Are you on an A330?

Just curious.

Yeah the least best plane to be on in turbulence.

riffmongous · 08-01-2017 4:34pm

Father Dagon!

accept this sacrifice and bestow on us your favour!

Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn! Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah-nagl fhtagn

Barry Badrinath · 08-01-2017 4:35pm

faceman wrote: »

Yeah the least best plane to be on in turbulence.

Just think of the Earth as a big dartboard.

Aaand youre the dart.

Be grand OP, be grand. Also, can ive yer stuff?

somefeen · 08-01-2017 4:35pm

Have you ever seen a grown man naked?

ceadaoin. · 08-01-2017 4:36pm

I think you need some medication for flying. You're always making these threads! It might be a bit bumpy but I'm sure it will be fine

I'll be flying the same route later in a couple of weeks. Hope it's all calm by then, turbulence turns me into a shaking mess tbh

frozenfrozen · 08-01-2017 4:38pm

we will all die eventually.. unfortunately for you today's your day

faceman · 08-01-2017 4:44pm

ceadaoin. wrote: »

I think you need some medication for flying. You're always making these threads! It might be a bit bumpy but I'm sure it will be fine

I'll be flying the same route later in a couple of weeks. Hope it's all calm by then, turbulence turns me into a shaking mess tbh

Have you ever tried to open a parachute while on medication?

The_Valeyard · 08-01-2017 4:51pm

Oh, kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go
'Cause I'm leavin' on a jet plane
Don't know when I'll be back again
Oh babe, I hate to go

But, I'm leavin' on a jet plane
Don't know when I'll be back again
Oh babe, I hate to go

FizzleSticks · 08-01-2017 4:52pm

This post has been deleted.

MightyMandarin · 08-01-2017 4:57pm

Dear Santy,

I know it's january and all but this random person on the internet could possibly die in the future. Be sound and let him see the end of ghostbusters pls.

Fleawuss · 08-01-2017 4:58pm

Your last 8 hours on earth and you rush to AH begging for prayers?

Sad bastard

pablo128 · 08-01-2017 5:02pm

Is it possible to sit at the rear of the plane? I've yet to hear of a plane reversing into a mountain.

mattser · 08-01-2017 5:03pm

If you're flying to San Francisco,
Be sure to wear some sturdy underwear...........................:o:o.gets coat.

RobertKK · 08-01-2017 5:05pm

We all gotta die sometime...

May the Lord have mercy on your soul.

Its all alt right · 08-01-2017 5:16pm

You might just get lucky OP.
Looking at the live weather app at 8 hours from the first post it starts to die down a bit. Best of luck.
https://www.windytv.com/?35.572,-117.125,7

sadie06 · 08-01-2017 5:24pm

Dear Jesus,

Let this not be my end, for it is far to early.
Let the Gate that I see be Golden, not Pearly.

Amen.

Best of luck!:)

08-01-2017 5:29pm

The world is ending in SF at the moment....or it's actually no worse than one or two storms you'd experience in the British Isles (yeah, I said that) most winters. The big problem at the moment are roads flooding.

Worst case scenario is a diversion to LA, but as the storm is starting to pass the OP is probably going to land without incident.

ygolometsipe · 08-01-2017 5:31pm

If you get me out of this one, thanks in advance

suicide_circus · 08-01-2017 5:48pm

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OlDEzmSff3M

08-01-2017 5:52pm

Nervous?

First time?

trashcan · 08-01-2017 5:54pm

I don't know if you're up there , but if you are, I could really do with your help right now.....

Superman.

08-01-2017 5:54pm

faceman wrote: »

Emergency exit seat, bit of steak for dinner and watching ghostbusters on the telly box (although sound is coming through only 1 headphone.) Theres even wifi.

.

You need to buy the ones they supply on the plane- most normal headsets aren't compatible with the input jack used in planes.

08-01-2017 5:55pm

Looks like you picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue OP

corner of hells · 08-01-2017 6:16pm

The_Valeyard wrote: »

Oh, kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you'll wait for me
Hold me like you'll never let me go
'Cause I'm leavin' on a jet plane
Don't know when I'll be back again
Oh babe, I hate to go

But, I'm leavin' on a jet plane
Don't know when I'll be back again
Oh babe, I hate to go

"He , jumped from 40000 feet without a parachute...... etc. "

In reality most of us will never see or experience a plane crash .

Except me , I survived.