Liveline thread 28/09/16 to date

Dan Jaman

Perhaps the neighbours are faintly grateful the wailing sounds of the saxophone are finally silenced.

TheHomeService

She'll get short shrift from Joe soon. Look at the time.

Atlantic Dawn

€2500 would get you nice setup for the college year, if you didn't step outside it you wouldn't know you were in a mobile home...





I wouldn't be too keen on the colour of the bathroom suite but other than that it's a goer



https://www.donedeal.ie/mobilehomes-for-sale/a-b-i-mobile-home/11650872

Dan Jaman

"You look after yourself."

Joe not giving a shoyte about Ray.

ButtersSuki

Jan_de_Bakker wrote: »

I miss the days of :

Caterer doesn't turn up for a communion , claims someone called him on his mobile threatening to batter him if he turned up -all parties are on LL and caterer just digs and digs and digs (my personal favourite - can't find it anywhere tho ... )

I missed dat wan so to speak Jan. Can you provide more details? Or perhaps a reenactment through the medium of dance?

furiousox

Alzheimer's, graves, death and general misery.
What a wankfest for JD today. :rolleyes:

djemba djemba

Only heard a bit of the first caller today. Did Joe find out how her first husband died.

somesoldiers

djemba djemba wrote: »

Only heard a bit of the first caller today. Did Joe find out how her first husband died.

"Suddenly" was all he could get despite best efforts

ButtersSuki

Going to listen to Seamus now on my way home. I have a sick bag in the car for emergencies, I'm hoping I won't need it so to speak.


The sick bad is white Joe (I know you read the thread and I know that not knowing the colour of the bag was going to annoy you so I answered your question before you asked it so to speak).

Atlantic Dawn

What's long and hard and got white stuff in it...a torpedo of cocaine...



http://www.rte.ie/news/2016/1025/826729-cocaine-discovered-clare/

ButtersSuki

Atlantic Dawn wrote: »

What's long and hard and got white stuff in it...a torpedo of cocaine...



http://www.rte.ie/news/2016/1025/826729-cocaine-discovered-clare/

Gettin' the Funny Fryday Festivties off to an early start Atlantic wit dat dubble entend-reh so to speak? Well done! Well done!

Anything meaty or funny today?

I was busy at work, couldn't listen to much of it.

I tuned in once to hear someone suggesting the assassination of the much-loved (mar dhea) Dickie Rock.

Hew must have lobbed a syringe harpoon into Joe's posterior, for Joe demonstrated very little rage, just that faint constipated/ straining sound he sometimes makes when he gets too close to the mic.

iamnotme

Atlantic Dawn wrote: »

What's long and hard and got white stuff in it...a torpedo of cocaine...



http://www.rte.ie/news/2016/1025/826729-cocaine-discovered-clare/

A lot of media types praying there won't be a drought come the Xmas soiree season.

foggy_lad

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

Anything meaty or funny today?

I was busy at work, couldn't listen to much of it.

I tuned in once to hear someone suggesting the assassination of the much-loved (mar dhea) Dickie Rock.

Hew must have lobbed a syringe harpoon into Joe's posterior, for Joe demonstrated very little rage, just that faint constipated/ straining sound he sometimes makes when he gets too close to the mic.

That noise is the hand-relief valve that is fitted to his blood pump going off as the temperature of his blood biles up, If he doesn't clear that little pipe in every show he could keel over

ButtersSuki

Well I listened to Seamus........I'm almost lost for words. His type are more common than you think; not doing exactly what he's doing per se, but more the mé féin-er, sleeveen, chancer (one of Joe's favourite words remember?)-type that is somewhat harmlessly labelled as a "cute hoor" in Ireland. The reality is underneath it all they're really disgusting opportunistic leeches that will do anything and screw over anyone for a shilling....so a typical Fianna Failer really. What's most surprising about Seamus is that he didn't have the cop-on not to go on De Lahv Lahn, normally these types would have enough between the ears to keep their mouths shut.

Joe was giggling like a schoolgirl at her first One Direction concert, he was definitely in awe of Seamus at stages though for "balance" (LOL), he asked a few slightly difficult and awkward questions that Seamus was able to deflect rather easily. I'd say Neol and the accountancy team got a call from Joe at 3:00:01 to find a property or two in de unadulterated kip dat is Dubalin Town for his next investments so to speak.

After all his fawning over Seamus, next week he'll be discussing the rental market and housing shortage in the city and lambasting landlords for charging "outrageous and disgusting" rents, conveniently forgetting of course that Seamus is single handedly removing 40 rentable properties off the market all by himself.

ButtersSuki

iamnotme wrote: »

A lot of media types praying there won't be a drought come the Xmas soiree season.

No, Gerry Ryan is dead.


What? Too soon?







Damn, my slot on Funny Fryday is gone now......

sligojoek

Couldn't listen today. The carpenter on the job had i104 on his ghetto blaster before I got there.

Is he plugging the book again? He'll get another christmas out of it, so to speak.

ButtersSuki

sligojoek wrote: »

Couldn't listen today. The carpenter on the job had i104 on his ghetto blaster before I got there.

Is he plugging the book again? He'll get another christmas out of it, so to speak.

Joe: Wat colour was de ghetto blaster? Was it yella?

Atlantic Dawn

sligojoek wrote: »

Couldn't listen today. The carpenter on the job had i104 on his ghetto blaster before I got there.

Is he plugging the book again? He'll get another christmas out of it, so to speak.

I'd say for health and safety reasons a carpenter is not allowed listen to Liveline, they would be inclined to wreck the place with a hammer with some of the callers.

Yes he was plugging book again, think it's Thursday night in same place that Funny Friday is on in, he mentioned a number of times that the event is free, free, free, of course the plug he gets from the state broadcaster is also free, something that would be a massive no at the BBC.

sligojoek

ButtersSuki wrote: »

Joe: Wat colour was de ghetto blaster? Was it yella?

Well done, caller. It's almost identical to that. My little Nokia phone and external speaker hadn't a hope against it. If I get there before him tomorrow I'll set it to R1 and superglue the tuning knob. That'll teach the young whippersnapper.

sligojoek

Atlantic Dawn wrote: »

I'd say for health and safety reasons a carpenter is not allowed listen to Liveline, they would be inclined to wreck the place with a hammer with some of the callers.

Yes he was plugging book again, think it's Thursday night in same place that Funny Friday is on in, he mentioned a number of times that the event is free, free, free, of course the plug he gets from the state broadcaster is also free, something that would be a massive no at the BBC.

There were days I felt like taking the angle grinder to the radio.

Hitchens

ButtersSuki wrote: »

Well I listened to Seamus........I'm almost lost for words. His type are more common than you think; not doing exactly what he's doing per se, but more the mé féin-er, sleeveen, chancer (one of Joe's favourite words remember?)-type that is somewhat harmlessly labelled as a "cute hoor" in Ireland. The reality is underneath it all they're really disgusting opportunistic leeches that will do anything and screw over anyone for a shilling....so a typical Fianna Failer really. What's most surprising about Seamus is that he didn't have the cop-on not to go on De Lahv Lahn, normally these types would have enough between the ears to keep their mouths shut.

Joe was giggling like a schoolgirl at her first One Direction concert, he was definitely in awe of Seamus at stages though for "balance" (LOL), he asked a few slightly difficult and awkward questions that Seamus was able to deflect rather easily. I'd say Neol and the accountancy team got a call from Joe at 3:00:01 to find a property or two in de unadulterated kip dat is Dubalin Town for his next investments so to speak.

After all his fawning over Seamus, next week he'll be discussing the rental market and housing shortage in the city and lambasting landlords for charging "outrageous and disgusting" rents, conveniently forgetting of course that Seamus is single handedly removing 40 rentable properties off the market all by himself.

Please try to remember, in Joe's little universe you cannot be a chancer if you're trying to 'better' yourself !!!

ButtersSuki

Hitchens wrote: »

Please try to remember, in Joe's little universe you cannot be a chancer if you're trying to 'better' yourself !!!

Joe: But but but but but but but but but but shure isn't dat all Seamuín is tryin' to do? He's only tryin' ta put a few shillins away so he and de wife can have a little breakeeen so to speka and maybe buy a few bukes at Christmas and dat so to speak? Speaking of which, me award winnin' buke is still available so to speak, priced under €20 as I did insisted at €29.99 and is called in case you missed it de udder 5,000,000 toymes I did plug it on de show "De Childers Dat Did Doyed for my profit in De Rising so to speak" says I. And wat harm is it in all in anyways is Seamusín is artifically and illegally inflating de entire rental market; shure isn't de Air B'N'B only for de fordeners so to speak?

ButtersSuki

sligojoek wrote: »

There were days I felt like taking the angle grinder to the radio.

Joe: and wat colour is de angle grinder?

ButtersSuki

I don't remember the exact attempted play on words he tried at the end of the call with Seamus but it was delivered with the usual awakwardness of a Duffy pub/joke - Seamus mentioned something about a dodgy stomach after eating some spicy pork (careful!) and Joe tried to shoehorn flatulence into an "AIR' B'N'B comment. Is it any wonder he thinks Brindin O'Cardle is a comic genius?
And obviously a very appropriate and professional sidetrack to take on national radio at lunchtime. He's so immature on top of everything else that's wrong with him. Thick and proud of it.

ButtersSuki

Hitchens wrote: »

Please try to remember, in Joe's little universe you cannot be a chancer if you're trying to 'better' yourself !!!

Just like de salt a de irths selling de baccy on Moore Street. Nothing wrong wit that in Joe's eyes. No connection to crime gangs at all.....:rolleyes:

SEPT 23 1989

I presume its Act III of Duffy's Carnival of Death today

foggy_lad

I keep going back to what a fantastic crimin probation ossifer Joe must have been, I'd say he was sacred shoitless and threw in the best of recommendations for the best of people. sur he even encouraged crimbinals to shuve mobile phones up their jackseys and ring the show from the prisons a few years back! Hard up for callers much Joe?

ButtersSuki

foggy_lad wrote: »

I keep going back to what a fantastic crimin probation ossifer Joe must have been, I'd say he was sacred shoitless and threw in the best of recommendations for the best of people. sur he even encouraged crimbinals to shuve mobile phones up their jackseys and ring the show from the prisons a few years back, - criminals who were subsequently killed for doing so btw but that's noting to do with Joe; once he got his call from prison, broadcast it on the national airwaves and got a few headlines in the paper Joe had no further use for him. He was cast aside like one of the €50 notes Joe uses to wipe his ass after a fine feed of coddle washed down with lashing of Bollinger '57 in De Samsung Kitchen @ l'Ecrivain. Hard up for callers much Joe?

FYP

ButtersSuki

foggy_lad wrote: »

I keep going back to what a fantastic crimin probation ossifer Joe must have been, I'd say he was sacred shoitless and threw in the best of recommendations for the best of people. sur he even encouraged crimbinals to shuve mobile phones up their jackseys and ring the show from the prisons a few years back! Hard up for callers much Joe?

I would imagine Joe's "technique" involved asking "WHOY?" a lot, suggesting they drop their ill-gotten gains at a presbytery and singing Come Bye Ah a lot.