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Giving money to parents

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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 12,449 ✭✭✭✭pwurple


    The 1/3 seems to max out your contribution to 100 per week. So if you work less it's less.

    This sounds fairer than i've heard other families do, where it's 100 per week no matter what.

    You will have saved enough for your car in a few months with that saving account.

    I was moved out by 18. Honestly, it seems a lot cheaper than that option.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,246 ✭✭✭judeboy101


    If you have gone from paying nothing to paying €400 pm for effectively the same service then you need to demand an upgrade in that service. Remind them that the service they give now will influence the level of service they get in whatever home you stick them in when they are old.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,872 ✭✭✭Macker1


    judeboy101 wrote: »
    If you have gone from paying nothing to paying €400 pm for effectively the same service then you need to demand an upgrade in that service. Remind them that the service they give now will influence the level of service they get in whatever home you stick them in when they are old.

    :eek::eek::eek:
    The mind just boggles at this response..... must be trolling


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,835 ✭✭✭Cork Lass


    unicorn97 wrote: »
    Tax is also a wonderful thing.

    It sure is, it pays SUSI grants for students.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,246 ✭✭✭judeboy101


    Macker1 wrote: »
    :eek::eek::eek:
    The mind just boggles at this response..... must be trolling



    Why? If you are getting a free service and are then asked to.pay for said service, do you not have the right to demand a better service?


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  • Registered Users Posts: 12,313 ✭✭✭✭Sam Kade


    I could feed a family of 4 on €100/week and not junk food, they are royally ripping you off there kid.


  • Registered Users Posts: 18,968 ✭✭✭✭Del2005


    judeboy101 wrote: »
    Why? If you are getting a free service and are then asked to.pay for said service, do you not have the right to demand a better service?

    There's no such thing as free. They are being asked to contribute to the running of the house. By your logic the parents should be taking all the wages as they've bought school books, paid for school, bought clothes and given lifts, along with feeding and cleaning. The OP is earning money so should be making a contribution and the father earning slightly above average is not a lot for a family of 5.

    There's no tax due for the parents as they can earn €12k under rent a room.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 57 ✭✭White Ninja


    Sam Kade wrote: »
    I could feed a family of 4 on €100/week and not junk food, they are royally ripping you off there kid.

    If you have a spare room you should advertise that it can be rented out for E100 per week, inc food and bills. There would a line forming at your door, doesn't seem like a bad deal to me.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,333 ✭✭✭Loveinapril


    Sam Kade wrote: »
    I could feed a family of 4 on €100/week and not junk food, they are royally ripping you off there kid.

    What about the rent, electric, gas, internet, cable TV? Not only is it fair that all working adults contribute at home, it is good practice for the OP to learn to manage their money. The parents only get €400 per month when the OP has worked the max. amount. The real world is not as flexible! I think the percentage idea is great, and I wish my parents encouraged me to save as much!


  • Registered Users Posts: 16,986 ✭✭✭✭Sleeper12


    bonyn wrote:
    The time for these games is up to the child being 15 or 16. Now, they're not kids. They're adults you're just treating like kids with this bank account in their name that they dont know about with funds earmarked solely for buying a house. Look, you charge rent, and you don't need the money so you put it away from them. I get it. I'd love to find out someone did this for me, if there were no strings attached. Just be careful you're not inadvertently controlling them financially.

    I don't see how they are being treated like kids. I charge them rent. Definitely not controlling them. They don't know about it. It's purely a leg up on the property ladder when the time comes. I want them to pay their way now but I don't need the money. I'd like to live another 30 years of more and don't see much point in keeping it till then and then leaving it to them. A lot of parents give their kids money gift when buying a home. This is all I'm doing. I don't need the money and I wouldn't try make money off my own kids, not in a million years. That's not to say if parents need it towards bills then they should use it that way. I'm not being high and mighty here. If I wasn't flush I'd be using the money they give on bills


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,866 ✭✭✭donspeekinglesh


    Sleeper12 wrote: »
    We take money from our kids 22 & 24. They don't know it but it goes into 2 separate accounts. When they are ready to buy their own homes they'll get it back. We collect the money not because we need it but because they need to be in the habit of handing in up.

    My parents did this too. 1/3 of every pay packet.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,884 ✭✭✭Tzardine


    Welcome to the real world. I dont mean to insult you but you sound very immature for a 19 year old.

    I wish I was paying only €100 a week for rent / bills / food.

    You have two choices really. Pay up or move out and do it yourself.


  • Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    OP your parents sound like they are controlling making you save 33% of your money. Do they have access to your accounts to know you are doing this? Your also only 19 and in college. You need to negotiate with your parents on a better rate than 1/3 of your wages, That's ridiculous. Negotiate a fair amountil with your parents and perhaps say you'll split the bills and food three ways.

    When I was in college my parents didn't expect a cent, and no it didn't give me bad spending habit's or any of the likes.


  • Registered Users Posts: 12,313 ✭✭✭✭Sam Kade


    If you have a spare room you should advertise that it can be rented out for E100 per week, inc food and bills. There would a line forming at your door, doesn't seem like a bad deal to me.
    They are his parents the room will be there regardless.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,379 ✭✭✭newacc2015


    Tzardine wrote: »
    Welcome to the real world. I dont mean to insult you but you sound very immature for a 19 year old.

    I wish I was paying only €100 a week for rent / bills / food.

    You have two choices really. Pay up or move out and do it yourself.

    IMO he is very mature for a 19 year. He is questioning whether or not his forcing him to hand over a third of his wage is fair or not. OP is in College, where he could have anything up to 40 hours of lectures a week plus studying and time getting to College. Yet he has to work another job etc.

    I was told in the first week of College from College admin, that job in College is beneficial to you. But only if you worked 12-15 hours per week during term time. Anything in excess of 20 was seriously compromising your studies. Say OP works those 15 hours at €9.15 per hour, after his forced savings and "contribution" to his parents he will have €45.75 a week to pay for transport, socialising and food. It is not a lot at all.

    Another option is OP parents realise that him performing well in College should be their only priority and not expecting €100 for a child they choose to have. A child they didnt pay financially to support in College. IMO a child going to College in Ireland is know the norm and really his parents should have financially paid for it.

    If you dont get a 2.1 in College these days, your degree is generally not worth the paper it is written on for a lot of employers and by a lot of employers, I mean anyone who will pay half decently. OP parents decision to be entitled to a third of their sons wages could cost him hundreds of thousands of lost pay over his career due to lost job opportunities from having a poor GPA when he graduates. Most Colleges in the UK would tell you to not even work part term during term time.

    IMO any parent who values a brown envelope every week instead of valuing their children education is a very short sighted parent and not a particularly good parent at that. OP can pay his way when he is the financial position to do so. Working full time in college is not then


  • Registered Users Posts: 22,280 ✭✭✭✭endacl


    judeboy101 wrote: »
    If you have gone from paying nothing to paying €400 pm for effectively the same service then you need to demand an upgrade in that service. Remind them that the service they give now will influence the level of service they get in whatever home you stick them in when they are old.

    If that was said, they'd be out on their hole so fast....

    Paying for a service? Fcuk right off.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,884 ✭✭✭Tzardine


    newacc2015 wrote: »
    ....OP can pay his way when he is the financial position to do so. Working full time in college is not then

    Is €1200 into the hand a month for a college student not a good financial position ?

    His parents are dead right and they should put him out on his ear if he has a problem with paying €100 a week.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 405 ✭✭HS3


    What is then1/3 savings going towards? You're giving 1/3 to your parents for your upkeep, which is fair. Does the 400 incorporate the 1/3 towards savings? Or are you putting money away for savings for a car and saving 1/3?

    I think it's a great thing for your parents to teach you! You've no idea how fantastic it will be to have that ethic! Saving €400 quid a month will build up a small fortune for you!


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,425 ✭✭✭RedXIV


    newacc2015 wrote: »
    IMO he is very mature for a 19 year. He is questioning whether or not his forcing him to hand over a third of his wage is fair or not. OP is in College, where he could have anything up to 40 hours of lectures a week plus studying and time getting to College. Yet he has to work another job etc.

    I was told in the first week of College from College admin, that job in College is beneficial to you. But only if you worked 12-15 hours per week during term time. Anything in excess of 20 was seriously compromising your studies. Say OP works those 15 hours at €9.15 per hour, after his forced savings and "contribution" to his parents he will have €45.75 a week to pay for transport, socialising and food. It is not a lot at all.

    Another option is OP parents realise that him performing well in College should be their only priority and not expecting €100 for a child they choose to have. A child they didnt pay financially to support in College. IMO a child going to College in Ireland is know the norm and really his parents should have financially paid for it.

    If you dont get a 2.1 in College these days, your degree is generally not worth the paper it is written on for a lot of employers and by a lot of employers, I mean anyone who will pay half decently. OP parents decision to be entitled to a third of their sons wages could cost him hundreds of thousands of lost pay over his career due to lost job opportunities from having a poor GPA when he graduates. Most Colleges in the UK would tell you to not even work part term during term time.

    IMO any parent who values a brown envelope every week instead of valuing their children education is a very short sighted parent and not a particularly good parent at that. OP can pay his way when he is the financial position to do so. Working full time in college is not then

    Not sure what industry you're looking at, but once you get past your first job, a lot of places don't care what you got in your degree, it's more about the work experience after that.

    I've dealt with plenty of people of various cultures who had parents who don't believe they should work while in college, and while it's not universal, most of them don't have the kind of work ethic as those who had to work through crappy jobs to get to their professional level.

    OP if you weren't getting the grant and were expected to fund College 100% yourself, I'd definitely consider negotiating with your parents, but as you have all of these advantages and a relatively well paying job in college, I think it's quite prudent of your parents to teach you to save. I know a phenomenal amount of people in their late 20s and early 30s (even some in their 50s) that are in so much trouble financially because they don't know how to organise their money properly.


  • Registered Users Posts: 297 ✭✭bonyn


    newacc2015 wrote: »
    Working full time in college is not then

    That's not what the op was asking. But thanks for playing.

    Fyi, depending on the course most degrees aren't worth the paper they're printed on. First class honours in a masters in cultural studies isn't going to get you a job in tesco quicker than a decent junior cert.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 665 ✭✭✭Lemsiper


    GrumpyMe wrote: »
    Why shouldn't he be paying tax?
    If he earns income above his tax credits he'll be due to pay income tax!
    Yet another of life's lessons!

    Speaking from personal experience I didn't pay when I was a full time student.


  • Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Speaking here as both a parent (with a house and bills!!!) and as an eldest child who paid some rent to my parents too...

    400eur is fair if you're working a 40 hour week every week (to my eyes). More than fair if you were in full-time no-holds-barred employment. Yes you're an adult, and yes you should pay your way. However you are also a student, and by the sounds of it, they aren't funding your education in any way.I appreciate your mum isn't working but on the other hand - that's her problem, not yours. (under the circumstances).

    Every family is different and every family has it's own thoughts on this.Clearly your parents feel that this is a fair contribution. Unless you can somehow change their minds, (and I would certainly have a discussion with them about the fact that you aren't always on a full 40 hour week and in those cases, 400eur is not fair), you're probably stuck with it. The alternative, as other people have said, is to move out. And unfortunately, that will cost you way more money.

    How exactly are they "forcing" you to save 400eur? Is it in an account they have access to or something?? Because really, once you hand over the rent to them, what you do with the remaining money is your business. Obviously, saving the money is great and I'd definitely recommend it, but I don't see how they can "force" you to do it either.


  • Posts: 17,728 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    ..........

    I suggest that you show them what it would cost to move into a rented house with a few mates, point out that they are charging you over the odds (remember a landlord probably pays 42% tax on rental income - I sincerely doubt your folks declare what you pay!) and point out that paying a ........

    Rent a room scheme ;)
    €10k per annum tax free.

    I suggest you inform yourself before advising others about tax affairs etc.


  • Registered Users Posts: 297 ✭✭bonyn


    Augeo wrote: »
    Rent a room scheme ;)
    €10k per annum tax free.

    I suggest you inform yourself before advising others about tax affairs etc.

    This is clownish..
    The comparison made is renting from a landlord who pays tax, and the parents who do not. And therefore should not be profiteering so much.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,006 ✭✭✭bmwguy


    Can I just ask if the people here saying the parents are out of order are financially independent, paying their own rent or mortgage, electricity, gas and refuse bills, insurance, car fuel repayments and repairs, pension, tv licence, food bills, furnishing a house, clothing themselves, saving for a holiday?

    Honestly would like to know, I very much doubt it though. You are going to get some shock in the future.

    When I started working I paid up at home, no problem. My parents didn't need it, didn't particularly want it either but I insisted. When I went to buy a house, I paid my deposit out of my own savings and got a mortgage, then I got a significant lump sum from my parents unexpectedly as a gift, which was nice, as I was flat broke!


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,012 ✭✭✭2RockMountain


    I'm sorry but €400 per month is absurd. They are your parents. You're being robbed. You can rent a room for that amount or less depending on where you live
    400 a month is absurd. Especially if your parenta demand that much. My mother asks for €20 per week. Move out and rent a room.

    teenagers.jpg

    Rent a room - yeah, sure, go for it.

    Then go looking for electricity to charge your multiple devices. Then go looking for broadband wifi to connect your multiple devices. Then go looking for a washing / ironing service to look after your clothes. Then go looking for some food, maybe some drink, maybe some hot water for showering and warmth on cold winter evenings.

    See how far you get with your €400 a month.


  • Registered Users Posts: 297 ✭✭bonyn


    teenagers.jpg

    Rent a room - yeah, sure, go for it.

    Then go looking for electricity to charge your multiple devices. Then go looking for broadband wifi to connect your multiple devices. Then go looking for a washing / ironing service to look after your clothes. Then go looking for some food, maybe some drink, maybe some hot water for showering and warmth on cold winter evenings.

    See how far you get with your €400 a month.

    This is the thing. Ok, the op's 19 but there was someone else in this thread babying a 24 year old.

    Yes. Let them move out. Wash their own clothes. Cook their own meals. Moan that the broadband on their phone is too slow to stream.

    It's not that hard, and they'll act like adults. And the parents can still do their duty in an emergency. better than depriving them of money then when they're 30 springing a few grand on them and say "congrats, you're ready to be an adult"

    Op has the worst of both world's in my view. Big bills but little independence.


  • Moderators, Regional Midwest Moderators Posts: 11,088 Mod ✭✭✭✭MarkR


    Not sure what the big deal is. You likely consider yourself an adult now. If you don't like paying, leave. With all the money you save (assuming you can live on 400 per month), you could probably hire a chauffeur for the car.

    Life is deceptively expensive. Everything costs more than you think, never mind the things you haven't thought of.


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,026 ✭✭✭TheIrishGrover


    The sense of entitlement from some of these posts is truly breathtaking. How were these people raised to develop such greedy, self-centered attitudes?:
    If you have gone from paying nothing to paying €400 pm for effectively the same service then you need to demand an upgrade in that service. Remind them that the service they give now will influence the level of service they get in whatever home you stick them in when they are old.

    DEMAND AN UPGRADE IN THAT SERVICE? Please, PLEASE let this be a troll. The pure arrogance in that sentence alone is simply shocking. Who the hell does this person think he is to talk to parents like that? What an absolute horror of a human being.... (OK Grover, calm down, he's obviously a troll :) )
    I'm sorry but €400 per month is absurd. They are your parents. You're being robbed. You can rent a room for that amount or less depending on where you live

    Parents. Not slaves. He's earning. Contribute. He can rent a room for that somewhere outside the city. Then commute to college/work. Then pay electricity. Then pay heating. Then pay internet. Then pay TV. Then pay water charge. Then pay upkeep on house. Then cook. then clean. And on and on and on. He is earning more than some people and they have to pay their own way.
    I suggest that you show them what it would cost to move into a rented house with a few mates, point out that they are charging you over the odds (remember a landlord probably pays 42% tax on rental income - I sincerely doubt your folks declare what you pay!) and point out that paying a percentage isn't fair. Suggest a flat rate of 250-300/month.

    Threatening them with the taxman? I'm simply flabbergasted.


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  • Posts: 18,749 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    If the OP is receiving a full Susi grant, he is because they assessed his parents on their income.
    Clearly they are not that rich.
    Anyway, OP, of course you should be giving your parents that much, I wish I could live somewhere that all my bills are covered for 400 Euro a month!

    My friends daughter is 21. She has never had a job, IN HER LIFE!! She has never handed up money at home & asks the mother for cash hand over fist.
    My stupid friend, with 3 younger kids & on benefits, gives her whatever she wants.
    I keep telling her, the daughter will keep on asking for her whole life if it goes on like this.

    OP, be glad your parents are teaching you about life & the value of money.
    I wonder how much you have cost them over the last 19 years........


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