Anxiety and depression thread (Please read OP)

Shint0

StripedBoxers wrote: »

Hey folks

Does anyone here know anything about being assessed for Aspergers as an adult?

How long does it take through the public system, what hoops need to be jumped through etc.

Would appreciate any info at all.

It can be quite difficult getting a diagnosis as an adult in Ireland for a neuropsychiatric or psychological developmental disorder. The reason being it tends to be assumed if one had the condition or disorder it would have been detected earlier in childhood. Some disorders can often be mistaken for others as there can be a lot of overlap between certain disorders and can sometimes lead to a misdiagnosis. Additionally, with a lot of psychiatric or psychological conditions they are never stand alone and can be a lot of comorbidity.

As another poster mentioned some professionals are not as clued in here even though they might claim expertise in the field. The numbers presenting as adults would be relatively few and certain childhood disorders can present very differently as adults. An adult may have been living with a disorder their whole life unbeknownst to themselves and may have developed different coping strategies over time compensating for certain features and may have an impact on any assessment outcome.

I really don't think there is enough expertise in Ireland within mental health services or psychological services to tease out the intricacies and the interplay of certain conditions especially with co-occurring mental health and neuro psychiatric/psychological conditions. I think the US probably has more expertise in this area and recognise the effects of undiagnosed conditions in adulthood.

RayM

Haven't been feeling very good for a while (a long time, if I'm honest) - social anxiety, general anxiety, maybe depression too, I don't know. It's hard to tell whether the feelings of depression are circumstantial or something deeper. A lot of things have changed in my life over the last few years and I'm increasingly not coping. I hate 'drama' of any description (fear of drawing attention to myself is a big part of my Social Anxiety), and hate being the centre of attention, so I have a tendency to con people (including myself) into believing everything is okay. This has prevented me from seeking help and has left me a bit isolated. My aversion to drama means that even when I do reach out to a professional (something I haven't done in a couple of years), I have a tendency to play things down - the self-deprecating "I'm okay, really" act takes over every time. And then I feel guilty for leaving them with the perception that I'm a time-waster. Over the years, I've spoken to doctors, psychiatrists, counsellors, cognitive behavioural therapists and been on various medications, but nothing has ever really helped.

I was supposed to have an exam this morning, but I didn't turn up. I had a panic attack late last night and didn't really get any sleep. It's one thing having a panic attack at home, but the fear of hyperventilating/vomiting in front of over a thousand people in a massive exam hall was too much. It doesn't really matter - I've been very unfocused this year, my grades are poor and I'll probably have to repeat the year anyway. I'm a 34-year-old mature student - another wasted year won't do any harm. I just really don't want to mess college up, or find myself with no choice but to drop out. It's literally the only potentially good thing in my life. It's causing me huge anxiety along the way, but I can recognise that the end result is all that matters.

So I plucked up the courage to ring the doctor this morning to make an appointment. Their computer system is down though, so they told me to ring back later. It's very frustrating, pacing around the house, vomiting and trying to build yourself up to make that phone call, only for it all to be a big anticlimax. I'll ring back later and I'll probably get an appointment for Monday or something. I don't hold out a huge amount of hope, but I have to try and do something to fix myself. Again.

readytosnap

RayM wrote: »

Haven't been feeling very good for a while (a long time, if I'm honest) - social anxiety, general anxiety, maybe depression too, I don't know. It's hard to tell whether the feelings of depression are circumstantial or something deeper. A lot of things have changed in my life over the last few years and I'm increasingly not coping. I hate 'drama' of any description (fear of drawing attention to myself is a big part of my Social Anxiety), and hate being the centre of attention, so I have a tendency to con people (including myself) into believing everything is okay. This has prevented me from seeking help and has left me a bit isolated. My aversion to drama means that even when I do reach out to a professional (something I haven't done in a couple of years), I have a tendency to play things down - the self-deprecating "I'm okay, really" act takes over every time. And then I feel guilty for leaving them with the perception that I'm a time-waster. Over the years, I've spoken to doctors, psychiatrists, counsellors, cognitive behavioural therapists and been on various medications, but nothing has ever really helped.

I was supposed to have an exam this morning, but I didn't turn up. I had a panic attack late last night and didn't really get any sleep. It's one thing having a panic attack at home, but the fear of hyperventilating/vomiting in front of over a thousand people in a massive exam hall was too much. It doesn't really matter - I've been very unfocused this year, my grades are poor and I'll probably have to repeat the year anyway. I'm a 34-year-old mature student - another wasted year won't do any harm. I just really don't want to mess college up, or find myself with no choice but to drop out. It's literally the only potentially good thing in my life. It's causing me huge anxiety along the way, but I can recognise that the end result is all that matters.

So I plucked up the courage to ring the doctor this morning to make an appointment. Their computer system is down though, so they told me to ring back later. It's very frustrating, pacing around the house, vomiting and trying to build yourself up to make that phone call, only for it all to be a big anticlimax. I'll ring back later and I'll probably get an appointment for Monday or something. I don't hold out a huge amount of hope, but I have to try and do something to fix myself. Again.

Except for the student bit you could be talking about me, I don't have any answer for you, I am just telling you that you are not alone in how you are feeling. I cannot talk to anyone, I've been on what I call stupid tablets for years (at least 7yrs) I don't think they help, I am always missing appointments because I do not want to deal with people (even in the waiting room) why bother going if all they want to do is throw more drugs into me?, maybe I do need more drugs but I think I need an outlet someone to talk too, problem is if I ever get to that stage, will I be able to talk? It is a vicious cycle. I hope things improve for you. None of my family know I take medication for depression, none of them even know i have depression, I am afraid to talk about it for fear of dismissal. Here's hoping you feel better soon.

jezzer

every day is literally a massive effort, all we can do is keep going but when does it get better..

Shint0

I can identify with a lot of what you said aswell but I think I know where it originated from. From childhood I was placed in a position where I had to suppress my own emotions and needs in favour of adult emotions and needs so it became a learned response and definitely does have an impact on help-seeking behaviour and the not wanting to be seen to create drama. So it can take a long time to build up the courage to reach out but I do think it can be unlearned.

I know you are wondering if contacting the GP will have any result or if it's a futile effort but sometimes just the mere act of doing something as opposed to nothing can create a slight momentum and drive us taking further positive steps. I did laugh slightly (ironically, not malevolently) when you said you finally got the courage to ring and told nobody could deal with and would ring back in a few hours. Been there. Done that. It's like the whole world is conspiring against us at times but you have set the ball in motion now.

Sorry to hear about your exams by the way.

trixychic

jezzer wrote: »

every day is literally a massive effort, all we can do is keep going but when does it get better..

This is my issue. Everyone says if you keep persevering it will get better...... 7 yrs later and its still not any better. Easier (cause we're in a bit more of a stable place) but not better.

StripedBoxers

twill wrote: »

You can be referred to an adult psychiatrist, waiting times are generally several months. Many people choose the private route for diagnosis. Aspire Ireland has the names of doctors who will give adult diagnoses. Ring around and you will get an idea of costs. On the low end of the scale, I have heard figures of 200-350, and those are doctors I have heard good things about.

Incidentally, if the person going for diagnosis female, I personally would bear that in mind when choosing a doctor given the more subtle signs in women. That is not to say male doctors wouldn't be up to speed with this,just what I personally would feel comfortable with.

Also, my doctor told me I couldn't be diagnosed on the public system, so there may be a lack of awareness out there.

Shint0 wrote: »

It can be quite difficult getting a diagnosis as an adult in Ireland for a neuropsychiatric or psychological developmental disorder. The reason being it tends to be assumed if one had the condition or disorder it would have been detected earlier in childhood. Some disorders can often be mistaken for others as there can be a lot of overlap between certain disorders and can sometimes lead to a misdiagnosis. Additionally, with a lot of psychiatric or psychological conditions they are never stand alone and can be a lot of comorbidity.

As another poster mentioned some professionals are not as clued in here even though they might claim expertise in the field. The numbers presenting as adults would be relatively few and certain childhood disorders can present very differently as adults. An adult may have been living with a disorder their whole life unbeknownst to themselves and may have developed different coping strategies over time compensating for certain features and may have an impact on any assessment outcome.

I really don't think there is enough expertise in Ireland within mental health services or psychological services to tease out the intricacies and the interplay of certain conditions especially with co-occurring mental health and neuro psychiatric/psychological conditions. I think the US probably has more expertise in this area and recognise the effects of undiagnosed conditions in adulthood.

Thank you both for your helpful replies and information.

How many appointments generally do you need with a psychiatrist and is the them who diagnoses it or another health professional?

Do you know where on the Aspire website they have the list of doctors as I can't seem to find it?

twill

StripedBoxers wrote: »

Thank you both for your helpful replies and information.

How many appointments generally do you need with a psychiatrist and is the them who diagnoses it or another health professional?

Do you know where on the Aspire website they have the list of doctors as I can't seem to find it?

Not sure how many appointments would be needed, I think it can vary. The psychiatrist (some psychologists specialise in this area too) would make the diagnosis.

Look for assessment and diagnosis - contact a professional on the Aspire website.

Keane2baMused

StripedBoxers wrote: »

Hey folks

Does anyone here know anything about being assessed for Aspergers as an adult?

How long does it take through the public system, what hoops need to be jumped through etc.

Would appreciate any info at all.

I know of a psychiatrist who can assess and diagnose adults for ASD / co-morbid disorders.

He's very reasonable also in comparison to many others.

If you want his name feel free to message me.

mickstupp

trixychic wrote: »

Where do ppl get the energy??

That is a marvellous question. I eat as much if not more than the people I know and I'm a mess after a couple of hours. I was "on" for three hours this evening in the pub this evening and the second I walked out of there I crashed. Mess.

trixychic

mickstupp wrote: »

That is a marvellous question. I eat as much if not more than the people I know and I'm a mess after a couple of hours. I was "on" for three hours this evening in the pub this evening and the second I walked out of there I crashed. Mess.

Oh I know the feeling. I can find work so difficult purely due to tiredness and lack of energy... which gets my anxieties up. Viscious effing circle!!!

Speaking of, I had an anxiety attack tonight while my family were here. They have never seen me like this and while I have told them countless times I have GAD they always roll their eyes and mock me.

It had been triggered by the stress of them being here and I could feel it coming on. After I put the boys to bed I came down and started finding it hard to breathe. I sat down with everyone and said I think im having an anxiety attack. Queue rolling eyes tutting and "fcuking whimp. .. your such a drama queen".

Then they started "look at this... it''ll calm ya down. Look at it look at it". Shoving phones in me face and laughing at me. I had to leave for the kitchen and get a drink. A minute later they all followed me.

My other half saw it then and came to see was I ok. I started shaking and crying while my family looked on shocked. Dad was saying "is there something you can take for it" my sister is going "this is fcuking weird" and my brother was saying "we have to leave now guys im tired." They all looked pretty shocked.

I hate that they saw me like that. They make me feel horrible about it and while to everyone else I can hold my head up and say "yes I have anxiety disorder and had depression for years" proudly and own it, with them I feel like I'm 30 yrs ago being scorned and outlawed for it. I was always the strong one. The one every one turns to. No one in my family ever seen me weak. I just got angry and shouted alot.

Normally I can keep it under control till they're gone at least but no hope tonight. Feeling pretty crappy!!!

Sorry for the long rant. Didn't realise I had so much to say.

Gremlinertia

Trixy, i would take from this that finally it's real to them.. It's horrible you basically had to 'prove' it to them, who asks for an x-ray to prove a broken bone, but maybe they will take it more seriously now. Hope you have managed to get to a better place in yourself so you get the rest you need tonight.

Tell me how

That sounds like an unbelievably tough situation Trixy. Now that they know, I hope that they respond positively.

readytosnap

trixychic wrote: »

with them I feel like I'm 30 yrs ago being scorned and outlawed for it. I was always the strong one. The one every one turns to. No one in my family ever seen me weak.

I am in that very same boat, I cannot let them see me weak and vulnerable.

trixychic

Thanks for all the replies. Don't really know what to say. Ibs flared up the smallest bit cause of the attack.

It's a great life we live... *eyeroll*

StripedBoxers

trixychic wrote: »

Oh I know the feeling. I can find work so difficult purely due to tiredness and lack of energy... which gets my anxieties up. Viscious effing circle!!!

Speaking of, I had an anxiety attack tonight while my family were here. They have never seen me like this and while I have told them countless times I have GAD they always roll their eyes and mock me.

It had been triggered by the stress of them being here and I could feel it coming on. After I put the boys to bed I came down and started finding it hard to breathe. I sat down with everyone and said I think im having an anxiety attack. Queue rolling eyes tutting and "fcuking whimp. .. your such a drama queen".

Then they started "look at this... it''ll calm ya down. Look at it look at it". Shoving phones in me face and laughing at me. I had to leave for the kitchen and get a drink. A minute later they all followed me.

My other half saw it then and came to see was I ok. I started shaking and crying while my family looked on shocked. Dad was saying "is there something you can take for it" my sister is going "this is fcuking weird" and my brother was saying "we have to leave now guys im tired." They all looked pretty shocked.

I hate that they saw me like that. They make me feel horrible about it and while to everyone else I can hold my head up and say "yes I have anxiety disorder and had depression for years" proudly and own it, with them I feel like I'm 30 yrs ago being scorned and outlawed for it. I was always the strong one. The one every one turns to. No one in my family ever seen me weak. I just got angry and shouted alot.

Normally I can keep it under control till they're gone at least but no hope tonight. Feeling pretty crappy!!!

Sorry for the long rant. Didn't realise I had so much to say.

I'm sorry to hear this, I hope you are doing okay today.

Its absolutely awful you feel that way about your family and how they have mocked you for your depression/anxiety.

I hope they now realise how real it is and how it can and does affect you.

I hope today has been a better day for you.

Tell me how

Very sorry to read that post that was just deleted. My heart goes out to the poster.
My only advice is to try to get help. GP, family member, friend, colleague, online support. Someone. I can't state how important it was/is for me to have someone to confide in.

I guarantee that it "can" get better. Wish I could guarantee that it will but that's unfortunately not possible. But I guarantee it can.

StripedBoxers

Tell me how wrote: »

Very sorry to read that post that was just deleted. My heart goes out to the poster.
My only advice is to try to get help. GP, family member, friend, colleague, online support. Someone. I can't state how important it was/is for me to have someone to confide in.

I guarantee that it "can" get better. Wish I could guarantee that it will but that's unfortunately not possible. But I guarantee it can.

I agree 100% with this post.

I hope the original poster of the deleted post is doing okay and gets some help.

*hugs* xx

Lady is a tramp

Jesus f*cking Christ.

I'm starting a new job today. After a year off work due to my f*cked up head.

Only discharged from St Pats on Friday after spending the last few months there. My psychiatrist, counseller, psychologist and all the nurses think it's too soon. They didn't want to discharge me, but are totally supporting me in my decision. I'm under strict instructions to leave a voicemail this evening to let them know how the first day went! And I have plenty of aftercare etc lined up.

The tyre on my car blew out yesterday. Making the commute to work very long and difficult until I get it sorted!

Wish me luck. Aaaaggghhh! I'm petrified.

Gremlinertia

Wow, well done Lady, you have a new job and all your support systems in place, that's more organised than i've ever been in my life!. Fingers and toes crossed for you.

jezzer

Lady is a tramp wrote: »

Jesus f*cking Christ.

I'm starting a new job today. After a year off work due to my f*cked up head.

Only discharged from St Pats on Friday after spending the last few months there. My psychiatrist, counseller, psychologist and all the nurses think it's too soon. They didn't want to discharge me, but are totally supporting me in my decision. I'm under strict instructions to leave a voicemail this evening to let them know how the first day went! And I have plenty of aftercare etc lined up.

The tyre on my car blew out yesterday. Making the commute to work very long and difficult until I get it sorted!

Wish me luck. Aaaaggghhh! I'm petrified.

thats brilliant, best of luck and good for you

jezzer

trixychic wrote: »

This is my issue. Everyone says if you keep persevering it will get better...... 7 yrs later and its still not any better. Easier (cause we're in a bit more of a stable place) but not better.

No, it never gets better as such, it gets bearable (most of the time) but it never ends..

I came to the realisation over the weekend that there is no such thing as happiness so i should stop trying to find it, all there is is the ability and mindset to bear the crap that is life, i have put myself in a position where i can limit the amount of crap i deal with which is something.

I cant make out this life at all, wayne rooney makes 200k a week, my neighbour cant get a job, what makes wayne rooney better that this guy?

I heard a bishop on the radio a couple of weeks ago and he really struggles with the fact that so many people in the world live in hurt whilst others thrive and live well, that will never change, so what is the point of all this?

bridgettedon

jezzer wrote: »

No, it never gets better as such, it gets bearable (most of the time) but it never ends..

I came to the realisation over the weekend that there is no such thing as happiness so i should stop trying to find it, all there is is the ability and mindset to bear the crap that is life, i have put myself in a position where i can limit the amount of crap i deal with which is something.

I cant make out this life at all, wayne rooney makes 200k a week, my neighbour cant get a job, what makes wayne rooney better that this guy?

I heard a bishop on the radio a couple of weeks ago and he really struggles with the fact that so many people in the world live in hurt whilst others thrive and live well, that will never change, so what is the point of all this?

To be honest even if I was paid 200k a week I would still have anxiety and depression. Money can make life easier but I don't think it brings happiness. I can't tell you what makes a person happy. Last week I wasn't feeling too good but the last few days I have felt pretty happy. Has anything substantial changed in the last week. No not really. Next week I could be feeling like you again. Life is strange and sometimes it seems pointless but it can get better. You won't spend every moment like you are walking on air but you can experience contentment with life.

jezzer

bridgettedon wrote: »

To be honest even if I was paid 200k a week I would still have anxiety and depression. Money can make life easier but I don't think it brings happiness. I can't tell you what makes a person happy. Last week I wasn't feeling too good but the last few days I have felt pretty happy. Has anything substantial changed in the last week. No not really. Next week I could be feeling like you again. Life is strange and sometimes it seems pointless but it can get better. You won't spend every moment like you are walking on air but you can experience contentment with life.

two things, yes you are correct, contentment can be achieved, i think thats a really good way of putting it.
When you say you are happier this week but nothing substantial has changed, think a little bit more, something definitely must have changed, something subtle, its amazing how a slight change can change how you feel so much, for example, briefly meeting an old mate, it might just be a quick hello on the street but its amazing how it can make you feel good without realizing it

On the money thing, i agree, if you suffer from anxiety and depression, no matter how much you have it wont change the fact that you suffer from those issues however something like money can really aggravate it, it leads to stress and increases anxiety and if you are constantly in money trouble it can increase depression, same goes for your work situation, i used to be in a terribly stressful work environment but i made a change, it was very difficult and led me to a lot of hardship but i am better now for it as i am in a less stressful job, the mental health issues as you say havent gone away but it makes it a heck of a lot easier to manage, as i said earlier, its about reducing the crap you have to deal with in life as opposed to chasing happiness, in your words attaining contentment

sparkyodea

Hi all,

Been reading here for a while, but decided to sign up and contribute a little! I'm late 30's and have been living with various degrees of anxiety and depression since I was 15. I've had a lot of ups and downs and I still struggle daily with various mental health challenges.

On my first post I'd just like to say to anybody that is particularly challenged at the moment, that it can get better. I was so badly ill in my teens and twenties, hospitalised for long periods of time, completely paralysed by anxiety disorders, life was a living hell. But somehow, I got through it, I wouldn't have wished what I went through on my worst enemy. But I'm still here, years later, and I've been the MD of a couple of companies, made lots of money, lost lots of money, had beautiful partners, been all over the world, and all that malarky. All the time there has been lingering, sometimes prominent, anxiety and depression.

I've been in a pretty dull and dark place for a couple of years, on the back of some challenging life situations, there are days I feel pathetic and weak, with little confidence, and I have a serious issue with self criticism.

But I'm hopeful, I think we have to be, that things can always get nicer, and easier and better.

So, blessings to you all, good will to you all, at least by seeing places like this, we realise that even in our darkest moments, we are not alone!

Hugo Stiglitz

sparkyodea wrote: »

Hi all,

Been reading here for a while, but decided to sign up and contribute a little! I'm late 30's and have been living with various degrees of anxiety and depression since I was 15. I've had a lot of ups and downs and I still struggle daily with various mental health challenges.

On my first post I'd just like to say to anybody that is particularly challenged at the moment, that it can get better. I was so badly ill in my teens and twenties, hospitalised for long periods of time, completely paralysed by anxiety disorders, life was a living hell. But somehow, I got through it, I wouldn't have wished what I went through on my worst enemy. But I'm still here, years later, and I've been the MD of a couple of companies, made lots of money, lost lots of money, had beautiful partners, been all over the world, and all that malarky. All the time there has been lingering, sometimes prominent, anxiety and depression.

I've been in a pretty dull and dark place for a couple of years, on the back of some challenging life situations, there are days I feel pathetic and weak, with little confidence, and I have a serious issue with self criticism.

But I'm hopeful, I think we have to be, that things can always get nicer, and easier and better.

So, blessings to you all, good will to you all, at least by seeing places like this, we realise that even in our darkest moments, we are not alone!

Welcome to the thread, friend.

mickstupp

Lady is a tramp wrote: »

Wish me luck. Aaaaggghhh! I'm petrified.

I hope it went ok!!!

bridgettedon

mickstupp wrote: »

I hope it went ok!!!

I hope it went ok as well.

jezzer

bridgettedon wrote: »

I hope it went ok as well.

Me too

jezzer

sparkyodea wrote: »

Hi all,

Been reading here for a while, but decided to sign up and contribute a little! I'm late 30's and have been living with various degrees of anxiety and depression since I was 15. I've had a lot of ups and downs and I still struggle daily with various mental health challenges.

On my first post I'd just like to say to anybody that is particularly challenged at the moment, that it can get better. I was so badly ill in my teens and twenties, hospitalised for long periods of time, completely paralysed by anxiety disorders, life was a living hell. But somehow, I got through it, I wouldn't have wished what I went through on my worst enemy. But I'm still here, years later, and I've been the MD of a couple of companies, made lots of money, lost lots of money, had beautiful partners, been all over the world, and all that malarky. All the time there has been lingering, sometimes prominent, anxiety and depression.

I've been in a pretty dull and dark place for a couple of years, on the back of some challenging life situations, there are days I feel pathetic and weak, with little confidence, and I have a serious issue with self criticism.

But I'm hopeful, I think we have to be, that things can always get nicer, and easier and better.

So, blessings to you all, good will to you all, at least by seeing places like this, we realise that even in our darkest moments, we are not alone!

Welcome, fantastic post, do you care to elaborate on what happened to bring you back to a dark place recently?

Do people feel that being ambitious whilst having depression and anxiety rub off each other very badly? Sometimes I feel I would be better off if i didnt give a sh&te and lived happily on the dole or in a dead end job, but for me, I am very ambitious and push myself hard which is difficult when you have mental health issues pushing against you all the time....