Joined at the hips

steddyeddy

One of my friends has been going out with a girl for two years. Every single time we go out he takes her with him. She goes mad when he doesn't. He brought her on a stag. I asked him for advice in confidence a while ago and he brought her along too. When I brought this up with him that the whole couples thing is driving me crackers him and her insisted on trying to set me up with someone despite the fact I'm emigrating soon. None of the other lads or female friends do this to this extent.

Do you know any couples that can no longer function as individuals and have to involve their OH in everything? I've stopped going out with them am I being unreasonable?

purplecow1977

steddyeddy wrote: »

One of my friends has been going out with a girl for two years. Every single time we go out he takes her with him. She goes mad when he doesn't. He brought her on a stag. I asked him for advice in confidence a while ago and he brought her along too. When I brought this up with him that the whole couples thing is driving me crackers him and her insisted on trying to set me up with someone despite the fact I'm emigrating soon. None of the other lads or female friends do this to this extent.

Do you know any couples that can no longer function as individuals and have to involve their OH in everything? I've stopped going out with them am I being unreasonable?

He brought her to a STAG?!??! Why would she even want to go?! Can't imagine it would be met with a good response if the shoe was on the other foot and a man was brought along to a hen! (Unless he was the stripper!)

She sounds very very insecure.

pmasterson95

Shoot her. Solve your problem.

steddyeddy

purplecow1977 wrote: »

He brought her to a STAG?!??! Why would she even want to go?! Can't imagine it would be met with a good response if the shoe was on the other foot and a man was brought along to a hen! (Unless he was the stripper!)

She sounds very very insecure.

It's not her alone to be fair. It's both of them and she's a little more sensible than him.

A friend of ours is long term single and he asked him out, invited his OH and two of their coupley friends. I mean have some sensitivity. They did the same with me when I was single.

SmilesInMass

steddyeddy wrote: »

It's not her alone to be fair. It's both of them and she's a little more sensible than him.

A friend of ours is long term single and he asked him out, invited his OH and two of their coupley friends. I mean have some sensitivity. They did the same with me when I was single.

Maybe they wanted him to fill in numbers for an orgy? An extra man is always useful in that situation!

cassid

Its healthy to be apart in a relationship, when away for a few days its great seeing your partner again, you need to be able to miss them.

I know a few women who don't allow their partners out without them, or they have to be home by dark even if thats 7.00pm.

Am married 15 years and would drive him to the pub to get some peace and quiet, not that he is any bother, sometimes just like the house to myself when the children are in bed

ShoulderChip

SmilesInMass wrote: »

Maybe they wanted him to fill in numbers for an orgy? An extra man is always useful in that situation!

I am with you there!
I dont see any need for women in an orgy.

steddyeddy

cassid wrote: »

Its healthy to be apart in a relationship, when away for a few days its great seeing your partner again, you need to be able to miss them.

I know a few women who don't allow their partners out without them, or they have to be home by dark even if thats 7.00pm.

Am married 15 years and would drive him to the pub to get some peace and quiet, not that he is any bother, sometimes just like the house to myself when the children are in bed

It's both of them and not his GF. He insists on her coming too.

corner of hells

steddyeddy wrote: »

It's both of them and not his GF. He insists on her coming too.

Very considerate of him insisting she comes.
Does he sleep in the wet patch ?

Aineoil

steddyeddy wrote: »

It's both of them and not his GF. He insists on her coming too.

That's not healthy for either of them.

purplecow1977

steddyeddy wrote: »

It's both of them and not his GF. He insists on her coming too.

But is that because if he doesn't he'll get an earful?!

I just don't see why 2 people can't spend a bit of time apart!

A night out with the boys, should be just that!

Going on a stag?! She should have more cop-on & say no! Will ye go off and enjoy yourselves!

Topper Harley

steddyeddy wrote: »

He brought her on a stag.

This is just beyond weird. It defeats the whole purpose of a stag.

cassid wrote: »

Am married 15 years and would drive him to the pub to get some peace and quiet, not that he is any bother, sometimes just like the house to myself when the children are in bed

If things don't work out, I'd like to marry you next.

mailforkev

How was he allowed bring her on a stag? Why did your group of friends accommodate this oddbod?

Stag options are very simple.
A. Friend comes minus girlfriend.
B. Friend doesn't come.

jamesbere

pmasterson95 wrote: »

Shoot her. Solve your problem.

Only solution really. Especially when she's goes on the stag. She probably has a tracking device on him

libelula

Jesus. If my fella brought me with him everywhere he goes, I'd throttle him! I've my own stuff to be at.

There are some major insecurity issues there OP, I can't say I blame you for ditching the friend

Talib Fiasco

He is p*ssy whipped by her.

hatrickpatrick

I've broken up with women for pulling this crap. My honest advice is, at the first hint of something like that developing, get out.

Talib Fiasco

hatrickpatrick wrote: »

I've broken up with women for pulling this crap. My honest advice is, at the first hint of something like that developing, get out.

The thing is, it's not so much that the woman is pulling this crap, it's the fact the man is allowing her get away with it which is only reassuring her to do it more. It's his fault for not manning up and telling her off, or yeah f*cking off out of the relationship

Banjo String

He brought her on a stag.

Stopped reading at this.

Take his man card away, immediately if not sooner. Stop all contract too.

The humanity.

steddyeddy

Aineoil wrote: »

That's not healthy for either of them.

Feck them it's not healthy on us! It's sickening!

moc moc a moc

steddyeddy wrote: »

He brought her on a stag.

This is the most pathetic thing I've heard in months. He should have been barred from the stag, and had his last man card confiscated.

NachoBusiness

I can't stand people.

El Weirdo

mailforkev wrote: »

How was he allowed bring her on a stag? Why did your group of friends accommodate this oddbod?

Stag options are very simple.
A. Friend comes minus girlfriend.
B. Friend doesn't come.

^This.

I honestly don't believe that this actually happened.

If it did, you and his other mates are just as bad for allowing it.

buried

"Brought her on the stag"? Sorry. Not buying that. If that actually did happen you all should have said you weren't going on it.

Deranged96

steddyeddy wrote: »

One of my friends has been going out with a girl for two years. Every single time we go out he takes her with him. She goes mad when he doesn't. He brought her on a stag. I asked him for advice in confidence a while ago and he brought her along too. When I brought this up with him that the whole couples thing is driving me crackers him and her insisted on trying to set me up with someone despite the fact I'm emigrating soon. None of the other lads or female friends do this to this extent.

Do you know any couples that can no longer function as individuals and have to involve their OH in everything? I've stopped going out with them am I being unreasonable?

OH... Other half... that's the problem, isn't it?

Nobody is half a person. Nobody needs anyone to complete them. You find someone who enhances your life and whom you love. You do not find your other half, you have two halves already.

She's terribly insecure if she can't leave his side, she doesn't view herself as an autonomous two halves person.

And it takes two to tango, so he can't be all that self assured himself.

steddyeddy

Guys I might have described the situation wrong but it's definitely not a case of home being whipped by her. Even when she's not out he calls her begging him to come out. It's just a weird weird interdependence him and her and some of their coupely friends have!

bodhrandude

I thought with the thread title you were talking about a catsuit or something like that.

biko

Somewhere on some chick forum there is a poster angry that her friend always brings the bf everywhere.

agent graves

b1tches be crazy

YurOK2

That sounds like absolute hell to me.
I'm feckin delighted when my husband tells me he's heading off somewhere, even if I'm not doing anything myself, it's nice to have a few hours to be by yourself.
There's something seriously wrong with your relationship if you need to go everywhere together. There's no trust and one or both have no self confidence.

Cold War Kid

Talib Fiasco wrote: »

The thing is, it's not so much that the woman is pulling this crap, it's the fact the man is allowing her get away with it which is only reassuring her to do it more. It's his fault for not manning up and telling her off, or yeah f*cking off out of the relationship

It's moreso her fault for bossing him around. Ideally he would tell her to get lost but responsibility still shouldn't be deflected entirely onto him.

razorblunt

mailforkev wrote: »

How was he allowed bring her on a stag? Why did your group of friends accommodate this oddbod?

Stag options are very simple.
A. Friend comes minus girlfriend.
B. Friend doesn't come.

This! It's so easy, just tell him to come on his own or not come at all.
I wouldn't be getting up to anything on a stag but I'd think I'd throw my hat at it if someone like that came along.

I'm not gonna lie. I'd take a stag over a hen any day of the bloody week. (though weekends would be my preference).

Not one me fella was going on though. Flippin Nora.

And this new shyte of a "hag" where the stag and the hen meet up. Fcuk. Off.

Butterface

Does he tag along with the gf when she's meeting her girl mates? Surely her friends would be just as pissed off when they invite her over for a girls night or whatever and he turns up!

Jaysus they'll get sick of each other quick!

Cold War Kid

I thought a hag was a gay guy's stag (lolled when I heard it being used in that context).

OldMrBrennan83

This post has been deleted.

Collie D

Forget the man card. Anyone who brings their gf/wife on a stag should be forced to revoke his penis. They both should have been told to f off at the start.

Have been on stags where we've met up with the hens the evening we got home to Dublin. Was against that idea but actually wasn't so bad and technically the stag and hen weekends had finished so no real harm.

I wouldn't necessarily blame the woman in this situation. I'd be blaming him more.

fatknacker

Deleted User wrote: »

I'm not gonna lie. I'd take a stag over a hen any day of the bloody week. (though weekends would be my preference).

Not one me fella was going on though. Flippin Nora.

And this new shyte of a "hag" where the stag and the hen meet up. Fcuk. Off.

I don't see much too bad with that. Many of my friends are fellas. I would not want to exclude them from my pre wedding shindig because they don't want to wear feather boas and drink willy straws.
Even I'd be in the "fk that" camp for hens.

Diamond Doll

I lost touch with a friend because of something similar. Herself and her boyfriend literally moved in together the first night they met and were inseparable ever since. I never got on with him and she knew it, yet she'd insist on bringing him everywhere. If I met up with her for a coffee, he'd be there every time, and we wouldn't be able to have a proper chat. She'd bring him on every night out, which I wouldn't even mind, but they'd just sit on top of each other in the corner all night and ignore everyone else. He used to walk her in and out of work every day - a grown woman, no reason for it, he worked the other side of town! It was just a really unhealthy relationship, I'm not sure if it was down to insecurity or what. They're still together as far as I know, several years later, so I guess it works for them. Doubt they have many friends left though!

fatknacker

fatknacker wrote: »

I don't see much too bad with that. Many of my friends are fellas. I would not want to exclude them from my pre wedding shindig because they don't want to wear feather boas and drink willy straws.
Even I'd be in the "fk that" camp for hens.

I agree, completely on that front. I know of hen nights that had men, and stags that had women (not the stripper kind).

The ones I'm talking about though aren't a mixed gender group of mates. It's that they should have been separate nights with separate friends, but the bride and groom couldn't bear to be apart for a night.

stoneill

How did she get on with the mickey measuring competition during the stag?

stoneill

stoneill wrote: »

How did she get on with the mickey measuring competition during the stag?

She forgot to bring her ruler.

Arra anyone who brings their gf to a stag is just an arsehole to be pitied. As for her, the type of woman who would invite herself to a stag should be avoided like the plague, how...needy.

bucketybuck

The rest of the guys on that stag must have been a pussy whipped bunch of numpties. Did none of them have the balls to tell the happy couple to **** right off?

kylith

steddyeddy wrote: »

Guys I might have described the situation wrong but it's definitely not a case of home being whipped by her. Even when she's not out he calls her begging him to come out. It's just a weird weird interdependence him and her and some of their coupely friends have!

And have ye told him that ye don't want her there? Like "Tommy, don't bring your girlfriend. We want to have a night out with you, not her. If you bring her we will ditch the pair of ye".

Old Perry

steddyeddy wrote: »

Do you know any couples that can no longer function as individuals and have to involve their OH in everything? I've stopped going out with them am I being unreasonable?

as a wise philosopher once said 'kick her straight in the face!!"

I love the way everyone is conveniently ignoring the fact that steddyeddy has said a few times that it's the boyfriend that's the problem, not the girl.

Easier just to assume he's "pussy whipped" I guess.

mailforkev

A few years back I used to work with a married woman in her late 30s who had never spent a single night apart from her husband. Not one. They had been married about a decade at the time.

We only found this out when the Xmas party was being organised as it was an overnighter on the other side of the country.

She 100% assumed her husband was welcome to come too. When this became apparent the boss had to have an awkward conversation to tell her that no, like a normal adult, you don't get a plus one to our Xmas piss-up.

She didn't come in the end.

Outwardly you would think she was completely normal too. She was confident and assertive with the bonus of being very good looking. But totally needy, the most unattractive trait of all.

Menas

Some couples are just like that. Do everything together.
Tis a bit strange to bring her along to a stag weekend though. The slagging one of our lads would get if he did that would be unimaginable.

LETHAL LADY

mailforkev wrote: »

A few years back I used to work with a married woman in her late 30s who had never spent a single night apart from her husband. Not one. They had been married about a decade at the time.

We only found this out when the Xmas party was being organised as it was an overnighter on the other side of the country.

She 100% assumed her husband was welcome to come too. When this became apparent the boss had to have an awkward conversation to tell her that no, like a normal adult, you don't get a plus one to our Xmas piss-up.

She didn't come in the end.

Outwardly you would think she was completely normal too. She was confident and assertive with the bonus of being very good looking. But totally needy, the most unattractive trait of all.

So basically you had the hots for a married woman and you were disappointed she didn't come to the overnight Xmas party alone.:p

PandaPoo

I know a couple like this. It's really annoying. They live in a different county to their families and the husband doesn't drive, so when she visits relatives in Dublin she brings him along. It's like she's afraid to leave him in the house by himself.

She thinks he'll die of starvation or something, because he doesn't drive. She went to a hen weekend and dropped the husband in her parents for the weekend they didn't know what to be doing with him.