help a gersha out hi

Witchie

So am stateside at the mo and last time I was here about a month ago my friends introduced me to this incrediblely gorgeous guy they knew. When he heard I was Irish he asked me to speak some more. He told me my accent was giving him a hard on. Then he said "don't tell me you drive stick shift" I replied "of course I do" and he said "I just came in my pants"

We left after that so that was the end of it. Until tonight.

I was back in that bar with my friends and he wasn't there so we decided to play a trick on him. I got his number, rang his phone and left a voice mail in my seductive Monaghan accent (real Monaghan none of your Carrick/Blayney muck mind) asking did he want to come for a ride in my car coz I knew how to drive stick.

Poor guy is texting me flat out for past 2 hours not having a clue who it is.

This is were I need some help...want to keep winding him up but am running out of ideas. Give me what you hot AHers.

Witchie

Ooops typo but it is feckin hot here, more so with him on my mind....

Jesus Wept

Seductive Monaghan accent is an oxymoron.

Ruu

'Lob it into me there!'

Witchie

The Rodgers wrote: »

Seductive Monaghan accent is an oxymoron.

Aye but you haven't heard me then....

Witchie

Ruu wrote: »

'Lob it into me there!'

Told him if he was here he would have to lob the gob so we could shift.

Duke O Smiley

Witchie wrote: »

. Then he said "don't tell me you drive stick shift" I replied "of course I do" and he said "I just came in my pants"

This has hurt me both physically and emotionally

Truckermal

I wouldn't blame him the Monaghan accent is fair sexy hai..

Witchie

Fierce sexy so it is. You could get in a wile hannlin with a young gersha from Monaghan you know.

Duke O Smiley

Witchie wrote: »

Fierce sexy so it is. You could get in a wile hannlin with a young gersha from Monaghan you know.

Thats not all you could get tbh

Witchie

But sure we are lovely cutties up here.

jacksie66

This post has been deleted.

Witchie

Gonna ask him if he has any road frontage.

suicide_circus

Dont drink and post kids

Niemoj

Haven't a clue what's going on.

Wompa1

I don't understand....what's going on? You want to say things to him that he won't understand. Is this meant to be cute, seductive, weird or retarded? Just give him the ride and stop posting here, you're giving us all diabetes.

Sheep Lover

"Shure mai fhanny is wetter than a newly suckled calf's mouth hai"

I can see the attraction...

Red Kev

Man goes to trouble of chatting Irish woman up.

Woman decides to take the p!ss out of him and wind him up as a thank you.

(Is it any wonder we just make a bee line to the foreign birds here.)

Red Kev

Red Kev wrote: »

Man goes to trouble of chatting Irish woman up.

Woman decides to take the p!ss out of him and wind him up as a thank you.

(Is it any wonder we just make a bee line to the foreign birds here.)

"you're giving me a hard on!" and "I just came in my pants".

Yeh. Defo the best chat up lines I've ever heard. Defo.

Crooked Jack

The Rodgers wrote: »

Seductive Monaghan accent is an oxymoron.

WRONG!

http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/merlin1/images/5/58/Charlene_McKenna_HQ_(5).jpg/revision/latest?cb=20120902101223

Crooked Jack

Witchie wrote: »

So am stateside at the mo and last time I was here about a month ago my friends introduced me to this incrediblely gorgeous guy they knew. When he heard I was Irish he asked me to speak some more. He told me my accent was giving him a hard on. Then he said "don't tell me you drive stick shift" I replied "of course I do" and he said "I just came in my pants"

We left after that so that was the end of it. Until tonight.

I was back in that bar with my friends and he wasn't there so we decided to play a trick on him. I got his number, rang his phone and left a voice mail in my seductive Monaghan accent (real Monaghan none of your Carrick/Blayney muck mind) asking did he want to come for a ride in my car coz I knew how to drive stick.

Poor guy is texting me flat out for past 2 hours not having a clue who it is.

This is were I need some help...want to keep winding him up but am running out of ideas. Give me what you hot AHers.

That's grand, south Armagh will just juke in there and take them. Ye can have the rest of "real" monaghan

jimgoose

Stop making an eejit of yourself and find something else to do. Hi.

MathDebater

Deleted User wrote: »

"you're giving me a hard on!" and "I just came in my pants".

Yeh. Defo the best chat up lines I've ever heard. Defo.

It seems to have worked.

witchie wrote:

Ooops typo but it is feckin hot here, more so with him on my mind....

Oryx

Whats a gersha?

Is it a geisha from Monaghan?

Boom_Bap

Maybe it's not you, maybe he just has a car fetish.

Tell him that you also have a clutch and have recently had an oil change.

jimgoose

Boom_Bap wrote: »

...Tell him that you also have a clutch and have recently had an oil change.

Americans don't know what a "clutch" is. He'd probably respond better to something like "four-speed Hydramatic"! :pac:

frozenfrozen

tell him you'll fly through nct

jimgoose

frozenfrozen wrote: »

tell him you'll fly through nct

Savage boo outta me on strawberry, laaaaad!! :pac::pac::pac:

Overflow

Witchie wrote: »

So am stateside at the mo and last time I was here about a month ago my friends introduced me to this incrediblely gorgeous guy they knew. When he heard I was Irish he asked me to speak some more. He told me my accent was giving him a hard on. Then he said "don't tell me you drive stick shift" I replied "of course I do" and he said "I just came in my pants"

We left after that so that was the end of it. Until tonight.

I was back in that bar with my friends and he wasn't there so we decided to play a trick on him. I got his number, rang his phone and left a voice mail in my seductive Monaghan accent (real Monaghan none of your Carrick/Blayney muck mind) asking did he want to come for a ride in my car coz I knew how to drive stick.

Poor guy is texting me flat out for past 2 hours not having a clue who it is.

This is were I need some help...want to keep winding him up but am running out of ideas. Give me what you hot AHers.

He may be hot, but he must be a f**kin idiot.

Boom_Bap

"I don't have run flat tyres so I always go down"

jimgoose

Boom_Bap wrote: »

"I don't have run flat tyres so I always go down"

What about a four-on-the-floor 'box??

Boom_Bap

jimgoose wrote: »

What about a four-on-the-floor 'box??

Would she need to bring 3 friends for this or would the 4 count as limbs?

jimgoose

Boom_Bap wrote: »

Would she need to bring 3 friends for this or would the 4 count as limbs?

Limbs, chief. That other business would need synchromesh. :cool:

Boom_Bap

Boom_Bap wrote: »

Maybe it's not you, maybe he just has a car fetish.

Tell him that you also have a clutch and have recently had an oil change.

and lubricant.....

brinty

I need to go to the DMv
do you wanna give me a proper going over before hand
I might need an overhaul after it...
you can get under my bonnet anytime ye like
do you like my headlamps...
wanna put your key in my ignition and rev me up

Boom_Bap

jimgoose wrote: »

Limbs, chief. That other business would need synchromesh. :cool:

Could lead to a gasket being blown.

brinty

Boom_Bap wrote: »

Could lead to a gasket being blown.

I'd say his head gasket went when he came in his pants

jimgoose

brinty wrote: »

I'd say his head gasket went when he came in his pants

Beware of a mayonnaise-like substance on the dipstick or around the filler-cap. 'Tis often a sign of big trouble! :pac:

brinty

i'd say witchie might need to get her oil checked...
but her dipstick is missing
could American boy help her out??
and loan her his dip stick???

Boom_Bap

I think this is a song that could be the soundtrack to any leather upholstered back seat action

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iD_qRi-jVw4

TOOT TOOT

Witchie

Wompa1 wrote: »

I don't understand....what's going on? You want to say things to him that he won't understand. Is this meant to be cute, seductive, weird or retarded? Just give him the ride and stop posting here, you're giving us all diabetes.

He met me back in May and was turned on by me being Irish so wanted to give him hints as to who he was talking to by saying loads of Irishisms.....he hasn't cottoned on. I left him another voicemail last night coz was too tired to text anymore so he might know by now but hasn't responded.

Red Kev wrote: »

Man goes to trouble of chatting Irish woman up.

Woman decides to take the p!ss out of him and wind him up as a thank you.

(Is it any wonder we just make a bee line to the foreign birds here.)

Aw here, am having the craic with the lad.....he seems well up for it. Told him I wasn't sure if it was the right guy I was texting and would need a photo and he sent me one.........nom nom nom......I wish I could be so lucky as to have him chatting me up, he is fecking gorgeous but maybe what I lack in the looks department might have been made up for by the craic we have been having by text and I might get lucky.......or not.

Overflow wrote: »

He may be hot, but he must be a f**kin idiot.

Aw he was a bit drunk I think so not sure he is totally dim. He is hot though. ummmmmmm

I think you should PM me his picture.

For....science.

TheLastMohican

Deleted User wrote: »

I think you should PM me his picture.

For....science.

I'd advise a look under his hood. He's bound to have a leaking oil problem. This can be fixed with a quick drainage, tightened jubilee clip and a half gallon of margarita engine oil.

Witchie

TheLastMohican wrote: »

I'd advise a look under his hood. He's bound to have a leaking oil problem. This can be fixed with a quick drainage, tightened jubilee clip and a half gallon of margarita engine oil.

His battery must be flat since we have radio silence all morning. Maybe I need to jump start him.....

brinty

Witchie wrote: »

His battery must be flat since we have radio silence all morning. Maybe I need to jump start him.....

do ye know how to operate jump leads...

_Whimsical_

I hate to be the bearer of bad news but if he was so taken with the accent wouldn't he recognise it in voicemails?
I think I'd put down the phone and slink away quietly at this point... or possibly 8 hours ago but it's still a good idea. If his phone has gone dead he's probably over it.

osarusan

Maybe he wanked himself into a coma.

brinty

Witchie wrote: »

His battery must be flat since we have radio silence all morning. Maybe I need to jump start him.....

Maybe his phone is off after he woke up in bed with his wife and realized that she spoke hill billy not Oirish???

Witchie

brinty wrote: »

do ye know how to operate jump leads...

Bejaysus am a bit of an auld expert with the leads boy.

Witchie

_Whimsical_ wrote: »

I hate to be the bearer of bad news but if he was so taken with the accent wouldn't he recognise it in voicemails?
I think I'd put down the phone and slink away quietly at this point... or possibly 8 hours ago but it's still a good idea. If his phone has gone dead he's probably over it.

He said the voicemail was breaking up so he couldn't hear it properly.....He could just be asleep it is not even midday here and if he was up drinking late he could be sleeping. Anyway sure it was all a bit of a laugh with his mates to see if he would remember me so not exactly worried about him.

brinty wrote: »

Maybe his phone is off after he woke up in bed with his wife and realized that she spoke hill billy not Oirish???

He is single.....:D

brinty

good girl slip them on his nipples, connect em up to the power source and he'll be fine...