Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names] - Part II

XxMCRxBabyxX

inforfun wrote: »

That and the urge to go to elverys, buy a baseball bat and smash something to pieces.

Please anyone, tell me it is a parody account by (tossed) salad couple

100% real. I've met her though not him. Watched their whole damn "love story" played out through Facebook.

dub_skav

XxMCRxBabyxX wrote: »

He's taking about fcuking salad!

#warriorfuel

Jrop

XxMCRxBabyxX wrote: »

100% real. I've met her though not him. Watched their whole damn "love story" played out through Facebook.

where's the eye roll emoji ? Sweet Mickey of the lord that's freaking horrific.
It's car crash posting

aaronjumper

So they are making drones with dildos on them for whatever reason, top comment under the article was great.
"So it's a flying fuck then?"
:pac:

XxMCRxBabyxX

Jrop wrote: »

where's the eye roll emoji ? Sweet Mickey of the lord that's freaking horrific.
It's car crash posting

Daily. They post this kind of sh*t daily...

JCX BXC

This one really got me when I read it. Who cares?



Edit: Image wont work, only link?

"Been to work now in dumbarton with lenny and Dylan has need new school shoes now their eating kfc then to asda get few bits then home Paul and zoe going to Scotland game later and Leon out shopping with his girlfriend"

RhubarbCrumble

Not a Facebook status, but along those lines so I thought it deserved a mention here.

I was in the fitting rooms in Penneys earlier on today and could hear every word of conversation from the two in the next cubicle. 'Lady' no 1's main concern was that her "Thighs are a f***ing show, I've satellites all over em" 'Lady' number two was there to make her feel better though as she replied with "Ah f**k that, I've satellites all over my thighs and a**e too specially after having the last little f****r. A bitta mock tan'll cover all the satellites, that's what I does"

I'd say Tasmin Archer would have something to say.

thesandeman

^
OK. For the men here, what's the proper word?

kunst nugget

I'm guessing it's cellulite?

RhubarbCrumble

kunst nugget wrote: »

I'm guessing it's cellulite?

Yup, that's what I took it to be.

mansize

clairewithani wrote: »

Has anyone else the taste of sick in their mouths?

Salad Cream smells like puke

coolhull

''Sum f**kin budje dat was. five uro an hav 2 waite til Marsh for dat. tawt fine fall was sposed 2 be on r side, wate till dey nock on my dor luckin 4 r voats''


^^
Translation Service available.....

coolhull

coolhull wrote: »

''Sum f**kin budje dat was. five uro an hav 2 waite til Marsh for dat. tawt fine fall was sposed 2 be on r side, wate till dey nock on my dor luckin 4 r voats''


^^
Translation Service available.....

Jeez twould take a sophisticated translation system to filter through that mess. One battle google definitely wont win

Toto Wolfcastle

coolhull wrote: »

''Sum f**kin budje dat was."

I was certain they were talking about a budgie.

marcbrophy

You know, it actually takes intelligence, to write that fcuking stupidly!

Ted_YNWA

coolhull wrote: »

''Sum f**kin budje dat was. five uro an hav 2 waite til Marsh for dat. tawt fine fall was sposed 2 be on r side, wate till dey nock on my dor luckin 4 r voats''


^^
Translation Service available.....

Some bad budget that was, €5 and I have to wait until March for it. Thought Fine Fail were supposed to be on our side, wait until they knock on my door looking for our votes.

bajer101

coolhull wrote: »

''Sum f**kin budje dat was. five uro an hav 2 waite til Marsh for dat. tawt fine fall was sposed 2 be on r side, wate till dey nock on my dor luckin 4 r voats''


^^
Translation Service available.....

I'd nearly be tempted to vote for Fianna Fail at the next election just to cancel out this idiot's vote.

PARlance

Toto Wolfcastle wrote: »

I was certain they were talking about a budgie.

O knee an eja wud tink dat ya mod ting

XxMCRxBabyxX

Some fun for our resident translators. Comments on a Journal.ie aeticle:

do ppl actually earn dis amt muni?? 👊ðŸ¼ðŸ‘ŠðŸ¼ðŸ˜‚😂

If u go int d artical it says it wnt affect dem at all coz dey clearly hav muni t wipe dere ass with on 100k a yr😂

PARlance

XxMCRxBabyxX wrote: »

Some fun for our resident translators. Comments on a Journal.ie aeticle:

Do people actually earn this much money?

If you read the article it says that it won't effect them at all because they cleary have money to wipe their arses with, on 100k a year.

inforfun

Too bad that complete illiterate spunkfaced knobhead gets more out of this "budje" than me who works 40 hours a week.

Samaris

Deleted User wrote: »

Jeez twould take a sophisticated translation system to filter through that mess. One battle google definitely wont win

Google Translate was able to identify it as English with Detect Language on, but that's about all it could do with it!

Samaris

coolhull wrote: »

''Sum f**kin budje dat was. five uro an hav 2 waite til Marsh for dat. tawt fine fall was sposed 2 be on r side, wate till dey nock on my dor luckin 4 r voats''

Maths sexing budgerigar that was. Five bonsai techniques an Hepatitis A virus two [town in Maine] towards bog for that. Tension Fine Fall was supposed two be on letter side, WATE.com unsorted glacial sediment they hook on my Department of Revenue lucky for letter website.

Makes total sense! :P

razorblunt

Carnacalla wrote: »

This one really got me when I read it. Who cares?



Edit: Image wont work, only link?

"Been to work now in dumbarton with lenny and Dylan has need new school shoes now their eating kfc then to asda get few bits then home Paul and zoe going to Scotland game later and Leon out shopping with his girlfriend"

Anytime one makes it back from Dumbarton alive is a cause for celebration.

Jrop

Thanks for cheering me up. Came home last night to find a leak in the kitchen called out an emergency plumber to be told the leak is coming from the apartment upstairs. GRR

kunst nugget

Jrop wrote: »

Thanks for cheering me up. Came home last night to find a leak in the kitchen called out an emergency plumber to be told the leak is coming from the apartment upstairs. GRR

That's a really shít facebook status. :mad: Up your game, son!

mackeire

HI WE ARE (company name) WE TRY HELP GET RID OFF ALL YOUR OLD AND UNWANTED STUFF FOR FREE BUT WE DO CHARGE TO TAKE AWAY SOFAS AND BED AND MATTRESS, S SO IF YOUR THINKING OFF CLEARING OUT THE ATTIC OR GARAGE OR STUFF LAYING AROUND SURE GIVE US A MAIL TODAY WE ALSO PROVIDE DELIVERY,S FORM HOUSE TO HOUSE OR SHOP TO HOUSE IKEA RUNS AND ALOT MORE WE ALSO PROVIDE RUBBISH CLEAR OUTS ASWELL AS GARDENING HOUSEHOLD WORK AND A LOT MORE SO GIVE USE A MAIL TODAY TANKS

loyatemu

coolhull wrote: »

''Sum f**kin budje dat was. five uro an hav 2 waite til Marsh for dat. tawt fine fall was sposed 2 be on r side, wate till dey nock on my dor luckin 4 r voats''

I'm sure he'll have found a job by March Marsh...

Boom_Bap

mackeire wrote: »

HI WE ARE (company name) WE TRY HELP GET RID OFF ALL YOUR OLD AND UNWANTED STUFF FOR FREE BUT WE DO CHARGE TO TAKE AWAY SOFAS AND BED AND MATTRESS, S SO IF YOUR THINKING OFF CLEARING OUT THE ATTIC OR GARAGE OR STUFF LAYING AROUND SURE GIVE US A MAIL TODAY WE ALSO PROVIDE DELIVERY,S FORM HOUSE TO HOUSE OR SHOP TO HOUSE IKEA RUNS AND ALOT MORE WE ALSO PROVIDE RUBBISH CLEAR OUTS ASWELL AS GARDENING HOUSEHOLD WORK AND A LOT MORE SO GIVE USE A MAIL TODAY TANKS

why are they shouting

kunst nugget

Boom_Bap wrote: »

why are they shouting

Because they're trying to be heard over the Tanks. They clarified it at the end.