Shake my hand. No you Scumbag.

MarkAnthony

So I'm in the chipper after work, maybe 10pm. Sitting there in my suit and tie waiting for me fish supper. Two socioeconomically challenged gentlemen walk into the establishment and start being low level dicks. Not my problem I sit there on the stool minding my own business.

Clearly both of them enjoy the odd tipple of more than the few beers they have in their hands. Again absolutely none of my business, but you know that habit Dublin junkies have of believing they're Oliver Bond's answer to Oscar Wilde one of them tries to engage with me over what he believes to be the shocking price of chips. I just shake my head and say 'dunno'. He walks back up to the counter and I resume my staring into space.

His mate walks past me towards the counter and says "Don't be shaking your head at him" not referring to my previous encounter but that his mate is not on at the guy behind the counter. Being rather late my reply was rather blunt "I'm not shaking my head at him but I'll shake my head at who the f**k I like thanks."

Anyways much squaring up and me telling them to step back later I've launched one of the scrawny ****es across the chip shop. Few mutual digs his mate decides (probably because at this point their beers are spraying everywhere coupled with the fact that I'm 6'2 and 18 stone so by sheer weight I getting the upper hand) that he's going to break it up.

Anyway what's irking me more than the moron behind the counter not calling the guards is these Scumbags were giving out because I wouldn't shake their fecking hands. You've just assaulted (and by the way I'm fully aware of the legal definition) me because I'm in a suit and tie and you thought you could be intimidating.

If you got to the end of this well done. Fully looking forward to some closure AH p!ss take style.

Gran Hermano

So two junkies battered your sausage?

actuallylike

you're so cool

SweetChaos

MarkAnthony is Irelands version of Epic beard guy!!!! YAY

wretcheddomain

MarkAnthony wrote: »

So I'm in the chipper after work, maybe 10pm...

I'm 6'2 and 18 stone so by sheer weight I getting the upper hand) that he's going to break it up.

You really shouldn't be ordering a portion of fish supper given the circumstances.

It should at least have been large curry chips with four quarter pounders.

Sheep Lover

At 18 stone you'd want to be staying away from chippers, tubby

Dr Turk Turkelton

Something fishy about this story op but they do sound like right Pollacks.

bodice ripper

Why not just say "I wasn't shaking my head at him", and avoid all the unpleasantness?

MarkAnthony

Sheep Lover wrote: »

At 18 stone you'd want to be staying away from chippers, tubby

You were beaten to that one though tbh.

Chancer3001

You're sh1t at writing.

Read like you were the one who assaulted him first.

RobYourBuilder

Again absolutely none of my business, but you know that habit Dublin junkies have of believing they're Oliver Bond's answer to Oscar Wilde one of them tries to engage with me over what he believes to be the shocking price of chips.

All you had to do was humour him and he would have thought you a great lad altogether. "I know, man. Celtic Tiger prices during a recession, wha?"

I bet you were condescending as f*ck to the chap.

Two socioeconomically challenged 

Sitting there in my suit and tie 

You where not in the office. You where in a Dublin chipper late at night. Gotta act accordingly. Some head the ball engages you in conversation: humour them.

josip

One of them was probably the driver of a red car on the Drumcondra Road this morning...

MarkAnthony

bodice ripper wrote: »

Why not just say "I wasn't shaking my head at him", and avoid all the unpleasantness

You're right of course but you're stuck between the devil and the deep blue sea. Say nothing they carry on. Say what you suggest they're likely to carry on. Tell um to feck off many get the message you're not scared and may actually feck off. Having lived worked in innercity Dublin for quite some time it's not as easy as just ignoring them when you're on your own.

Anyway that was way too serious.

ComfortKid

With you're attitude it's a pity they didn't put you to sleep.

The Backwards Man

I'm in local scoffing a single fish, a treat to myself after giving blood.

Not a scobe in sight, you need to change your chipshop.

Sheep Lover

MarkAnthony wrote: »

You were beaten to that one though tbh.

Who cares? I fashioned the general portrayal of the situation more eloquently and less wordy.

How were the chips after anyway?

MarkAnthony

RobYourBuilder wrote: »

All you had to do was humour him and he would have thought you a great lad altogether. "I know, man. Celtic Tiger prices during a recession, wha?"

I bet you were condescending as f*ck to the chap.


You were not in the office. You were in a Dublin chipper late at night. Gotta act accordingly. Some head the ball engages you in conversation: humour them.

Why the feck should I perform for a couple of scumbags. I'm just home from paying their dole and as you can read from the OP I said nothing to them so how I can condescend them is beyond me.

MarkAnthony

Sheep Lover wrote: »

Who cares? I fashioned the general portrayal of the situation more eloquently and less wordy.

How were the chips after anyway?

How do you think they were I'm 18 stone and live 3 minutes walk from the chipper! Pretty nice.

Ruu

How long did you sit there waiting for your fish and chips to realise that you have to order at the counter and not wait for someone to come along? Bet your monocle was severely disjointed!

DVDM93

I'm getting my fish at home tonight off two scumbag junkie birds up ya boyya!

The clunge plunger

Opiate his chips after that ordeal.

NMB

chips are relative - but gorgeous in the Roma

NMB

or macari

RobYourBuilder

MarkAnthony wrote: »

Why the feck should I perform for a couple of scumbags. I'm just home from paying their dole and as you can read from the OP I said nothing to them so how I can condescend them is beyond me.

Anything for an easy life. You wouldn't have got into a straightner if you humoured the chap. Might have had the ears waffled off you for a few minutes, mind. Still, better than getting into a fight wearing what I imagine was an expensive suit. F*ck it though. If you wanna get into unnecessary scraps, be my guest.

There's a lot more to communication than the spoken word, btw.

wretcheddomain

MarkAnthony wrote: »

How do you think they were I'm 18 stone

Why do you feel the need to tell everyone, multiple times, that you're 18 stone?

It's not exactly something to be proud of.

pablo128

Fair fcuking play to you. I genuinely love hearing stuff like this. The more wannabe hardmen get a few smacks in the gob, the less theyll be bothering and intimidating members of the public. Well done.

anncoates

AH: facilitating the pugilistic fantasies and torturous proletarian phobias of beleaguered students and neckbeards since, forever.

MRnotlob606

you should stole their heroin and shot up with your new buds in the hostel

Nodin

MarkAnthony wrote: »

So I'm in the chipper after work, maybe 10pm. Sitting there in my suit and tie waiting for me fish supper. Two socioeconomically challenged gentlemen walk into the establishment and start being low level dicks. Not my problem I sit there on the stool minding my own business.
....................

MarkAnthony wrote: »

I'm just home from paying their dole and as you can read from the OP I said nothing to them so how I can condescend them is beyond me. ....................

Ye see if you didn't make the remarks about your suit, them being "socioeconomically challenged" and being "just home from paying their dole" I'd believe you weren't being condescending at all. However.

Ranchu

MarkAnthony wrote: »

Why the feck should I perform for a couple of scumbags. I'm just home from paying their dole and as you can read from the OP I said nothing to them so how I can condescend them is beyond me.

You pay their dole and they give you a bit of excitement on a Wednesday night. I bet you feel good to be alive after a bit of interaction with the proles.

MarkAnthony

RobYourBuilder wrote: »

Anything for an easy life. You wouldn't have got into a straightner if you humoured the chap. Might have had the ears waffled off you for a few minutes, mind. Still, better than getting into a fight wearing what I imagine was an expensive suit. F*ck it though. If you wanna get into unnecessary scraps, be my guest.

There's a lot more to communication than the spoken word, btw.

I'd been humouring people for 8 hours at work. Sometimes you're not in the mood. When he spoke to me I spoke back. I wasn't looking in his direction (except when speaking to him), as indicated it's none of my business what he was at until he started an altercation. Lived in the area for more than a decade never had an issue.

Sheep Lover

wretcheddomain wrote: »

Why do you feel the need to tell everyone, multiple times, that you're 18 stone?

It's not exactly something to be proud of.

Because it's pure muscle from all the chips and fighting he does

case885

wretcheddomain wrote: »

Why do you feel the need to tell everyone, multiple times, that you're 18 stone?

It's not exactly something to be proud of.

Read his post again, i'd doubt he was implying he's proud of it.

MarkAnthony

Nodin wrote: »

Ye see if you didn't make the remarks about your suit, them being "socioeconomically challenged" and being "just home from paying their dole" I'd believe you weren't being condescending at all. However.

Suit remarks were based on why they thought I was going to be scared of them. My thoughts are my own, none of that was communicated to them. If they chose to imply it from the way I was sat that's really their problem.

JCX BXC

I just have to comment on how this thread is unbelievably unusual.

From my experience, people like the "scumbags" you were describing are looking for a reaction, to have a story to tell their junkie friends in the pub later. Just give short but sarcastic answers and they usually get annoyed and go away. Sure, its like your letting them intimidate you, but they have sad, poor lives and a few more criminal convictions for them is nearly something to be proud of.

Sam Quentin

Nice one Mark, 'don't be shaking your head at him'... Was the moment there was no turning back.

Nodin

MarkAnthony wrote: »

Suit remarks were based on why they thought I was going to be scared of them. My thoughts are my own, none of that was communicated to them. ........

I'm sure you don't think you did.

PizzamanIRL

Maybe they assaulted you for staring into space without a telescope.

kumate_champ07

not sure which of the people in the story is the scumbag

delw

So safe to say you battered them OP

MarkAnthony

Nodin wrote: »

I'm sure you don't think you did.

Why is there any onus on me, minding my own business, to give a flying **** how I'm coming across to someone else? What you seem to be suggesting is it's fine to be intimidating and threatening because you don't like the way someone is sat and dressed?

While I'm 99% sure you're just engaging in some low level trolling, which I have of course invited, if you're actually in the 1% category please get some help. If for example you saw a guy dressed for prayer in a mosque and you had the impression he was looking at you funny, you'd get in his face yeah? think it was okay for someone to get in his face?

pablo128

kumate_champ07 wrote: »

not sure which of the people in the story is the scumbag

Well it wasn't the fella sitting there minding his own business.

efb

a fridge too far?

MarkAnthony

delw wrote: »

So safe to say you battered them OP

I actually couldn't fight my way out of a wet paper bag, I wont say its the first punch up I've been in but certainly it's been a few years. All the more reason they thought fatty would be bullied by them. In all honesty I did lose the plot and should have defused the situation but as I've said above I wasn't in the mood.

RobYourBuilder

MarkAnthony wrote: »

I'd been humouring people for 8 hours at work. Sometimes you're not in the mood.

It's part and parcel of living in the city centre. People strike up conversations with one another. Blow ins don't seem to understand this.

When he spoke to me I spoke back.

I've no doubt that you spoke to the chap in a gruff and condescending manner. Your posts reek of a sense of superiority.

Lived in the area for more than a decade never had an issue.

That will probably change.

Anyway what's irking me more than the moron behind the counter not calling the guards

Why do you think that was?

Turtyturd

And that wraps up this segment titled 'Things that didn't happen today'.

MarkAnthony

RobYourBuilder wrote: »

Your posts reek of a sense of superiority.

Any yours of that sense of inverted snobbery.

Ush1

Did they give you a free fish an chips or were you already finished?

Sam Quentin

kumate_champ07 wrote: »

not sure which of the people in the story is the scumbag

Did you read his story, he was 100% right to do 'what he had to do'... It wasn't a wee squabble at work with one of his sober work-mates, at least we'll not be reading in the paper tomorrow about a man viciously attacked in a chipper on the way home from work.... Anyway I know a lot of these comments are just trying to wind him up, deep down you all wish you could handle it like he did.

punisher5112

Op are you chuck Norris?

I know you are getting on a bit only a junkie would think they had a chance.

Ahhhhhhh heeeeeere leave it ouuutttt.

Plazaman

.....not referring to my previous encounter but that his mate is not on at the guy behind the counter....

I've re-read this sentence several times and still have no clue what happened.